20. Sammie

CHAPTER 20

SAMMIE

T his is absolute bullshit. How dare other people dictate our lives. This is 2024, for fuck's sake. It's not Salem in the 1700s. The Council can go and take a flying leap off a short pier for all I care. Lewis gets one bond. In three hundred years, he has one . One chance at happiness. Over my dead body is he losing that. I throw the blankets off and stalk from my room to the living room.

He isn't here.

The shower is running. My gut flips. I pad to the bathroom door and rest my hand on the doorknob. Letting my head hit the door, I force breath into my lungs. I have never needed someone as much as him. Ever. Bond or no bond. Even before today, he was my choice. I turn the knob and open the door. He looks out from under the falling water and stills. I walk in and leave the door open.

"Sammie, no."

I unbutton my shirt and let it fall. I walk toward the shower, pushing my pants over my hips. My heart flings in my chest, breath short and choppy. His toned body tenses. And he closes his eyes, washing out the shampoo from his hair in a hurry. Wiping the hair from his eyes and the water from his face, he steps partially out of the water. I open the glass door and step into the water. He steps back into the stream, dark eyes watching every move, his arms tense by his side.

God, he is stunning. I drag my gaze from his face, down his throat to where his Adam's apple bobs, down his rapidly heaving chest, over his hard stomach, tracking down the V between his hips to his hard length.

Holy shit.

His leg muscles are tensed. Like he is using every fiber of his being to stay rooted to the spot.

"I will break you, Sunshine." His voice is almost inaudible.

I lift my gaze to meet his and press a finger over his lips. "No, you won't. I won't let you."

I run my finger down his neck and between the ridges of his chest and move into his space, covering his mouth with mine before pushing back.

"Do you have any idea how much I need you?" I whisper over his mouth.

"That's the bond talking," he utters.

"No, it's not," I say, letting my hands wander to his hips. I trace circles around his stomach and dip them lower now and then. He growls into my neck. Stepping around me, he slams a hand onto the shower wall, caging me under his frame. He kisses his way down my neck and over my collarbones. My body is on fire. Like it's going to burn me alive if he isn't inside me.

His hand leaves my hip and tracks to my center. His fingers find my apex before brushing over my wet core. My body shakes and he presses his hardness into my belly. His lips find my breasts, tongue flicking over a nipple before sucking it, releasing it with a pop. He leans back and finds my gaze.

"You sure you want to do this, Sammie?"

"Yes."

He slips a finger into my core, and I buck against the wall. His mouth finds mine. "Tell me to stop, Sunshine."

"No."

"Samantha. Tell me to stop."

"Never. Don't you dare."

He crushes me against the shower wall. I gasp, but I was ready for this. I dig deep, chasing the wind from earlier, and hold him back with one hand. Far enough he can't hurt me, close enough he can love me. His face lights up with surprise when he realizes I am holding him back. A smile washes over his hooded features. "Good girl."

I close my eyes and let him closer. He drops to his knees and grips my hips. Water flows down over his head, through his hair, and down his face. He lifts me up and holds me against the wall before moving my legs over his shoulders. He buries his head into my center, his finger brushing over the bundle of nerves throbbing for him.

One broad stroke of his tongue and my body turns limp, my legs shaking with every hot stroke. The water gushes over us both, and I run my hands through his hair. Closing my eyes, I arch my back from the wall and moan.

Lewis slides two fingers into my center, and I tighten around him. He growls, and the vibrations send me over the edge. He holds me until the last wave of oblivion subsides before standing and pressing a kiss to my forehead. He turns and opens the shower door. I grab his hand.

"Where are you going?"

"To make you dinner."

"What about you?"

"I'm not worried about me, Sammie." He steps from the shower and closes the door. "Besides, I just watched the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I'm satiated." His body betrays his words. He is hard, and huge, his veins flushed to the surface over every muscle.

Liar.

I move under the water. His gaze tracks me as I move my hands over my breast, before letting a hand slide to my still throbbing wet heat.

He clenches his jaw, eyes feral.

I close mine and sink a finger into my wet heat, hoping it will torture him enough to come back into the shower.

The whip of the wind of something fast makes me open my eyes.

The door is shut.

Lewis is gone.

S omething savory baking drags me from my pouting in the bedroom and into the kitchen. If it wasn't for the rumbling in my stomach, I would wait him out. Lewis is dressed and puttering around the kitchen, chopping ingredients for what looks like a green salad. I spy the baking dish on the counter sitting on the heatproof mat. Lasagna. My favorite.

"Hungry?" he asks.

I slide onto the stool at the counter as he scrapes the chopped peppers and tomatoes into the salad bowl, forearms flexing. My voice is low and breathy. "Starving."

He stops and looks at me. I bite my lip and pull in deep breaths, trying to stamp out the heat pooling in my core. And failing.

Lewis clears his throat, pushing his sleeves up past his elbows, and nods to the side cupboard. "Wine?"

"Sure," I say, sliding from the seat. I make my way around the kitchen and grab a bottle of red. I slip between him and the counter. "This okay?"

He slams his palms either side of me and lowers his head, nuzzling my neck. "You are not making this easy for me, Sunshine."

I twist back a little and put the bottle down. "Good."

As I turn back, his mouth finds mine. My spine curves around the edge of the counter as he presses into me, hard. I shove my hands into his hair. The kiss is deep, and I open my mouth wider, letting him in. His tongue finds mine.

I run my hands down to the hem of his sweater and slip them under the soft woven fabric, finding his hard stomach. I walk my fingers up his stomach and over his chest. He pulls back and rips his shirt and sweater from his back and tosses them to the floor.

"Hold me back, Sunshine."

"Uh-huh."

I close my eyes and dig into the well of power low in my center. I gather the force and let it funnel between us as he rushes me. He is almost too strong to hold back. He bites his way softly down my throat and over my chest. Teeth find my nipples through my PJs.

"Lewis."

"Sammie." My name is a low growl.

One hand moves to my hip, the other sliding behind my head and through my hair. With every ragged breath from my lips, I inch toward his face. I push on his chest, and he pulls back. My eyes alternate from his gaze to his lips.

Blood thunders in my veins as he lowers his mouth to my neck. He runs kisses up my throat. I release a low moan. His grip on my hip tightens, and I close my eyes. At this point, if he fed on me, it would be a welcome release.

He won't.

He's Lewis.

Self-control personified.

"Lewis," I choke out, wanting to see his face.

"Mhmmm," he rumbles against my neck.

"Lewis, please." The words are nothing more than breath.

He raises his head. His eyes are dilated, almost fully black, thirst and desire competing their way across his gorgeous face. He picks me up, and I wrap my legs around his waist. We make it to the sofa before he drops me and covers my mouth with his.

Warmth flickers across my palms. I push back, moving up the sofa, and Lewis trails kisses down my throat again. I pull in a sharp breath, glancing at my hands, now behind him. I clamp them shut and the small flames disintegrate to wisps of smoke.

I can't burn him.

Fuck.

I concentrate on holding him back with wind. Ragged breaths cycle from my chest. I need to change this up before I lose my concentration again and hurt him. I tap his chest with a hand, and he stills, moving from my space, eyes wide. "Did I hurt you?"

"No," I rasp. "I just—" Heat floods my neck and face.

"What is it?"

I move from the sofa and kneel on the floor. "Can I show you?"

He nods, shifting on the sofa. He studies my face, trying to figure out what I need to show him right now. I huff out a nervous laugh, and he sinks into the sofa further. I lift his hands from his lap and start working on the buckle of his pants. His eyes lower to my hands.

"Sunshine, you don't have to."

"Believe me, Lewis, I want to."

He growls, low and heady, as I make quick work of his pants. His hard length springs from its confinement and I grip it with one hand. With a moan, he lays his head back on the sofa. I lick the tip, and he tenses, his breaths quickening.

He grabs my shoulder and shoves a hand through my hair. I smile around the head of him and lower myself as much as possible. He is freaking perfect. Sliding my mouth back up, I suck and release with a pop.

"Sammie?"

"Yes?"

"If," he pants.

I move back down his length, tongue swirling around the base of his head.

"I," he rasps.

Pulling back up, I grip him tight with my hand, skating my teeth over the top of his tip.

"Move," he moans.

I take the full length of him in my mouth.

"Hold me," he utters, hands falling from my hair and shoulder to grip the sofa.

"Mhmmm." The sound vibrates through him; I feel it in my hand.

"Hold me back," he grinds out.

He moves. In an instant, I am knocked to the floor. His hands grab my shoulders, picking me up and my back slams into the wall beside the hearth. His eyes are completely black.

Hold me back.

He was trying to tell me he lost control. Pushed into the wooden cabin wall, my shoulders bark with pain. Tears burn behind my eyes. His hand moves from my shoulder to my neck, crushing it. My breath stops.

I pull at his wrist. He is built like stone. His eyes are vacant, blackened by whatever has him entranced. His teeth descend.

Shit!

I pull at the center of my power. I buck against the wall, out of air. The wall of wind I had made before is nowhere to be found. I fling my palm open and let the fire go. "I'm sorry," I choke.

Flames lick his sweater. He rears back, mouth open, canines sharp and deadly.

"Lewis, stop," I rasp.

His sweater smolders, and flames creep up his torso. I throw another round of fire. Sobs slam into the crushed part of my throat. His fingers curl harder into my neck. Fire isn't working. I raise a hand and curl my finger toward us, hoping like hell water follows.

Nothing.

I try again. The sink rattles and the pipework groans.

A heartbeat later, water is pouring over a stunned Lewis. I cough and gasp, sucking in as much air as I can gather. His face turns from stunned to devastated in a second.

I slide down the wall and close my eyes, breathing in deep cycles.

I hear his zipper work before he hits his knees on the floor in front of me. His warm hands shake, brushing over the angry burning area of my throat.

"God, Sunshine, I am so sorry."

I open my eyes. "It's okay, Lew."

Tears line his. He pulls me into his hold and his chest shudders. I pull back in his hold. Tears cascade down his cheeks and over the sharp shape of his jaw. Every breath he takes is pained and short. "God, I'm sorry, Sammie."

"I'm fine; you took me by surprise, that's all. Next time I'll be ready."

He flinches and drops his arms. "There won't be a next time."

"Lewis, no. Please, it's fine. I'm fine."

His gaze drops to my neck. "I could have snapped your neck, Samantha."

"We'll take it slower next time."

"I said no , Sunshine." He stands and disappears out the front door.

I bury my face into my hands and sob. For the first time in my life, I feel like I have lost something so precious. Something I would do anything to get back. I can bear facing the Council or being banned from magic. I can even stick it out in isolation on the run from Anjelica.

But I can't bear to see Lewis hurting. I can't bear to see him not have what he needs, all in order to keep me safe. I won't stand for him going without the one thing he has waited hundreds of years for because he thinks I am too fragile.

He can't hurt me if he turns me first.