23. Kirsten

When I woke up the next morning, my mood had not improved. Jace was still caught up in his head, and I was getting tired of him taking out on everyone else. After getting home from dinner last night, I'd hoped a nice long night of rest would help. It hadn't. Plus, my head was throbbing from the accident.

I lay there, a pulsating drum beat blasting away between my ears. There had to be a spell that could take the pain away, but I didn't want to deplete more of my energy. I never knew whether I'd need the full power of my magic today. Better to be fully energized and in pain than worn out and comfortable. For all I knew, Eren would attempt to kidnap or kill me yet again.

Rolling over, I grabbed my phone from the nightstand. The message from Jace the night before was still open on my screen. I'd never replied to it. He wasn't actually angry at me, that much was obvious. It was all in his head, but that didn't mean he could lash out at everyone who cared about him. He was angry and anxious and didn't feel like he was enough. I wished I could fix it for him, but I didn't know how. But if he didn't figure it out soon, I worried he'd have a breakdown.

The sun was barely up, but I could hear muffled footfalls in Jace's room next door. I listened to him moving around, getting ready for the day. His door opened, and his footsteps moved in the direction of my door. Acting like a child, I closed my eyes and pretended to be asleep in case he checked on me. I didn't have the mental capacity to talk about what had happened the night before.

The clunk of his boots stopped right outside my door. I imagined him, hand raised, ready to knock. He didn't. A few seconds later, his steps trailed away as he went downstairs. The front door opened and closed, and the house descended into silence again.

I opened my eyes and huffed. Why hadn't I gotten up to talk to him? Why was it like some insurmountable thing I didn't have the energy for?

How could I help him? I'd tried comforting him as best I could, tried to talk him out of feeling the way he did, but I simply couldn't imagine how he felt. I'd never been a man, much less a shifter alpha. I needed to talk to someone about it, if only to get it off my chest.

I got dressed and went downstairs, where I made French toast out of a loaf of sourdough. Harley joined me ten minutes later.

"Oh my god," she said, eyeing the slices frying on the pan. "Carbs and sugar? A woman after my own heart."

"I thought you'd be happy," I said, sliding a couple of pieces onto a plate and handing it over, along with a bottle of maple syrup.

"You," Harley said, pointing at me with her fork, "look like shit."

"Thanks. Just what every girl wants to hear."

"Well, it's the truth. You didn't sleep well, did you?"

"No," I admitted. "I kept tossing and turning. I'm still mad at Jace and the way he acted. It's like I told you last night at dinner, he's being such a big baby about all this. He's become a completely different person. Hesitant, overbearing, easily pissed off. He keeps freaking out on me."

Harley took a few bites, then nodded. "Here's the deal," she said. "I'm not justifying the way Jace is acting. When he got all snippy in the hospital, I kinda wanted to punch him, so don't get the wrong idea, but—"

"Are you going to say something to make me mad?" I asked, dumping my own breakfast onto my plate.

"Not mad, but maybe something that will help you see things from his point of view. How about that?"

"Proceed," I groaned, shoving a piece of French toast into my mouth.

"So, I sort of see where he's coming from. He's Mr. Big Bad Alpha, biggest dick on the block, right?"

I shrugged and took another bite. "Yes, to the big bad alpha, and… well, yes to the other part, too."

"Ha! I knew it." She flashed me a triumphant smile. "Anyway, as I was saying, he's never not been at the top of the pyramid. He's waited a hundred years for his mate, then she shows up and almost immediately gets kidnapped and nearly assaulted. He doesn't even get to save her; she saves her own damn self. Not only that, but then she almost gets hurt again. On his own land, no less.

"From what everyone has said, this Eren douche is half the man Jace is, yet he keeps getting closer and closer to screwing him over. It's like getting your ego stepped on. Add to that, this hotshot Flynn shows up. It's no wonder Jace feels a little inferior right now. I can see why he's losing it a little. Nothing he does is helping the situation."

I stared at her for a long moment, letting that all sink in. Jace had admitted that he felt less capable than others, including me. But the way Harley explained it made even more sense. Eren had gotten under Jace's skin. The asshole was always one step ahead. If I had to guess, that was the real reason Jace was so tightly wound. The other stuff only exacerbated it all.

"Well, shit," I said. "That makes it seem a little less childish, I suppose. He's freaking out because he doesn't think he can keep me safe. Is that what you're saying?"

"Basically. He's also probably worried about losing face with his pack. Here's the bigger question, though," Harley said, tossing her fork onto her empty plate. "Do you want to live in a world without Jace? Every guy can be a dick now and then, just like every woman can be a bitch. Is that enough for you to cut it off and go back to your boring human life?"

"No," I said. "I don't want to lose him."

"Then you know what you need to do, don't you?"

"Shit." I tugged my phone out of my pocket.

Harley stood, put her plate in the sink, and walked toward the door. "I'm gonna head into town, see what fun there is to be had. I'll see if Tank or the other guy can take me. Looks like you might need some privacy."

"Yeah," I grunted, then shot off my text.

Can we talk? Can you come home now?

Within seconds, Jace responded.

Be there in five minutes.

He was as good as his word. A few minutes later, he walked through the door.

"Where did you go this morning?" I asked.

He gestured toward the door, eyes downcast. "Decided to go on a run. Clear my head, you know? Where's Harley going? I saw her driving away with one of the guys as I came running up the driveway."

"She, uh, needed to get something in town. Can we sit down?"

Jace's face tightened with worry. "Yeah. Sure."

We settled on the couch, and I could see him bracing himself for bad news. Did he think I was going to break up with him? Chew him out? Whatever he thought, I needed to get him to relax.

I put my hand on his thigh. "Calm down, Jace. We're okay."

As though my words had shattered some glass wall he'd erected around himself, he let out a shuddering sigh and sank into the couch. "Sorry. I'm a little wound up."

"I can see that." I took a breath, then let it out slowly. "I may not understand exactly what you're feeling, but I can empathize."

"You can?" He looked hopeful rather than bitter.

"I'll never understand what it's like to be an alpha, but I do understand the pressure you're under. Me being your mate means I'm here to help take on some of that load. I want to help you take on the responsibility. But Jace, we can't run a pack together if we can't even communicate."

Jace leaned his elbows on his knees and looked at me, a chastened expression on his face. "I'm sorry. I've been acting like a spoiled brat. If Waylan or someone else in my pack had been doing this, I'd have chewed their ass out. You're right, though. The pressure is getting to me. I've never felt anything so heavy. Even taking over the pack after my parents died was easy compared to this. As much as you don't want to lose your parents, it's something you know deep down will eventually happen." He shook his head bitterly. "But having someone trying to take the woman you love every other day? There's no way to prepare for that. I have to kill Eren. Everyone is depending on me to do that. Not just my pack, but the surrounding packs, and the innocent people of Scottsdale, too.

"I should be able to keep my mind on task, but all I can see is Eren's head on a spike. The guy really knows how to get under my skin. It's probably what he wants."

"That anger is normal," I said, cupping his cheek. "I'd be angry, too. I am angry. You just need to focus that anger on him and our plan to make him pay. Focus it on training Dustin and Ivy's packs, helping Flynn, leading your people. We need you to have your head on straight. It's okay to be upset and stressed, but it's not okay to take it out on everyone. That's a one-way street to loneliness, and I don't want that for you or us. I'm not going anywhere, and you need to get that into your thick skull."

Jace took my hand. "I'm so sorry, Kirsten. I'm a fucking idiot."

"We all know that. Was there something new you wanted to tell me?"

The smile that spread over his face warmed my heart. "Very funny. Yes, I'm a dick. I know. Again, I'm sorry. I promise I'll do better. For my pack, and most importantly, for you."

"That's all I want."

"Speaking of that," Jace said. "I've been too careful with you. You're powerful in your own right. You should come to the training session today. Help us. It would be good to practice the drills using your magic, too."

I blinked in surprise. "That sounds great, actually."

"Let's go," he said, smiling and extending a hand to me.

Jace included me in the training that day and every day for the rest of the week. I used my magic to supplement the drills and training Flynn and Langston put everyone through. Instead of treating me like some porcelain doll that could shatter at any moment, Jace allowed me to really be a part of it all. By the end of the week, I felt more powerful and in control of the offensive and defensive spells. On Thursday night, I called Tinsley to tell her how I'd managed to summon wind and rain simultaneously during one drill. I was bouncing up and down, giddy at my accomplishment.

By Friday, Flynn and Langston were happy with how well the training was progressing.

Waylan slung his arm around my shoulder in a brotherly manner. "This is because of you," he said. "This is what it was like before the schism, back when our kind worked together. The shifters brought out the best in the witches, and the witches brought out the best in us. It's pretty crazy to watch, actually. I sort of thought that was all exaggerated, but clearly not."

At the end of the training session on Friday, Jace climbed up onto the bed of a truck and looked out at all the gathered shifters from three different packs.

"I want to thank you all," he said, his voice booming out across the clearing. "None of you had to do this. None of you were forced here. You came because you know that what is happening is wrong, that what Eren is doing is an abomination, and that it has to be stopped. It stops here! It ends now, and we will be the ones to do it."

A rumble of agreement rippled through the crowd, but Jace was just getting started.

"For too long, we sat back, knowing what kind of person Eren was. We all knew, every alpha and every beta. We didn't want to rock the boat. No one wanted a shifter war. No one wanted to be the one to light that fuse. I am ashamed of myself," Jace said, jamming a thumb into his chest. "So I know many of you are ashamed of yourselves, too. Here, on this ground, I tell all of you to throw aside that shame. Remember who you are. Remember that we have honor and we understand right from wrong. Victory is the only option, and together, we will take Eren down. Every person here, from this day forward, can consider themselves a brother and sister of the Crestwood Pack.

"I will stand beside you if and when Eren decides to attack one of us. If he attacks one of us, then he attacks all of us. After what I've seen this week? His men will rue the fucking day their alpha decided to screw with us."

The crowd erupted in applause and hoots of excitement. The sound did something to Jace's confidence and pride, pushing his alpha aura out in a majestic way. It cascaded over me, mingling with my inner magic, making it sing like a gong in my chest and head. It made me dizzy and excited, and my skin flushed. A giddy feeling fluttered through me, almost like I was tipsy.

Once the crowd had settled down, Jace climbed off the truck, shaking hands left and right as everyone tried to have a word with him—thanking him, complimenting him, and letting him know how glad they were to be included in the alliance. I stood off to the side, watching Jace bask in the glow of the others' adoration.

Eventually, Flynn pulled him aside for a quiet word. "Jace, thank you for everything," he said.

"No thanks needed," Jace replied. "This is about all of us, and it's about stopping an evil son of a bitch."

"Right, yeah." Flynn glanced toward me. I could see he was uncomfortable, but he turned back to Jace. "I just wanted to tell you that if things work out the way we hope… well, uh… I want to be an alpha like you. I've never seen someone handle so much while staying true to himself and his people. I wanted you to know that."

Jace looked at the bigger, more powerful man with a mixture of surprise and pride. He gripped Flynn's shoulder. "It is going to work out. You can bet your ass on that. When it does, all you have to do is ask, and I'll help you and your pack in any way I can."

Flynn grinned. "Be careful. You might have me calling you at all hours for advice."

"I'll answer the phone no matter the time."

When everyone had finally dispersed, Jace took my hand and led me back to the house. We didn't speak, but energy crackled between us. We stole glances at one another and giggled like little kids. Something strange was happening. I could still sense his aura and my magic mingling. A heady dreaminess had settled over both of us.

Inside, Jace closed the door, then yanked me close, his lips crashing onto mine. I sighed into his mouth, feeling my magic yawn to life like a blossoming flower exposing itself to the heat of the sun. Something was different.

"I need you," Jace murmured against my lips.

My voice caught in my throat, and all I could do was nod, an emphatic jerk of the head that told him what my mouth couldn't. Take me. I want you. I need you, too.

Jace picked me up, and I wrapped my legs around his waist as he took the stairs two at a time. He set me down inside his bedroom, then closed and locked the door. By the time he turned back around, I'd stripped down to my underwear. He stood, eyes locked on me as I undid my bra and slid my panties down. The look he gave me sent a shiver of lust through me. A steady, pleasurable ache radiated between my legs as I imagined what he'd do to me.

Keeping eye contact, he undressed, slowly sliding his shirt up over his head. Every item of clothing tossed aside was like a faint breath blowing on the fiery embers within my chest, feeding it to a roaring flame. My magic shimmered in my mind, sending me into a frenzy of desire. My fingers trembled, and I had to clasp them together to stop it.

At last, he stood before me naked, his body still holding a sheen of sweat from training. I had to remind myself to breathe as he stepped toward me. When his hand touched my hip, I gasped, and as it slid across my skin to cup my breast, a smile touched my lips. When he flicked his thumb across my nipple, I groaned. The energy between us crackled like static electricity.

"Kirsten," Jace said as his fingers grazed my breasts, "I don't think I can be gentle. I'm not sure I can hold back anymore."

"What does that mean?" I whispered as I ran the tips of my fingers over his cock.

He closed his eyes and grinned. "That feels so good." After a few moments, he opened them again and looked into my eyes, a piercing gaze that threatened to burrow all the way to my soul.

"What I mean is that I want to claim you. Make you mine."

The words had a remarkable effect on my body. I was already wet, but now I was dripping, heat radiating out from between my legs across my entire body. My heart hammered in my chest. Being told someone wanted you forever was something everyone dreamed about. Hearing it from the mouth of the man I loved was even more intense than I'd thought it would be.

Jace pressed his forehead to mine. "Can I claim you?"

Stroking him, I gave an almost imperceptible nod. "Yes. I want to be your mate. Forever."

A look of profound happiness washed across Jace's face. That only lasted for an instant before the devouring hunger returned. His low growl vibrated through his body into mine.

He pushed me back onto the bed and climbed atop me. I did my best to keep from hyperventilating as my magic threatened to overwhelm me. Jace moved his mouth down the length of my throat to my collarbones, then let his lips graze my breasts before gliding his tongue across my nipples. I arched my back, aching to be filled, to have him thrust into me. The head of his cock grazed my clit, and I damn near came from just that alone.

"Look at me," Jace whispered. "Look into my eyes. I want to see your face when I slide inside you."

I gazed into his eyes as the tip of him pressed inside me.

He stopped. "When I start, I won't be able to stop. I know I won't." The words came out in a tremble. "Are you okay?"

"Claim me, Jace," I said. "Fuck me and claim me."

With a snarl, he thrust his hips forward, burying his full length within me. I cried out, jaw dropping open as I came, body shuddering and convulsing. I'd never orgasmed so fast in my life, and he was just getting started. An excited fear overcame me as he slammed in and out of me, faster and faster with each thrust.

Jace kissed me, moaning and growling into my mouth as he impaled me with his cock. I twined my fingers into his hair and lifted my hips to meet his, sucking at his tongue greedily.

Another orgasm was already building, fed by my magic. Jace gripped my shoulders and pulled me onto his cock, driving my body down as his hips pressed forward. I basked in the ecstasy of being taken, the carnal and animalistic way he was fucking me so erotic that I couldn't imagine anything better.

"Harder," I moaned, already tipping over the edge of another climax. "Harder, Jace."

He did as he was told, crashing into me so hard that our skin slapped together, the pop-pop-pop of flesh on flesh echoing through the room.

"Fuck!" I cried out, drawing the word out as I came again.

"Yes," Jace grunted. "Come for me, baby. You're so sexy when you come for me."

My eyes rolled back, and I slid my hands along the muscles of his chest, tracing patterns in the sweat that coated his skin. I surrendered, letting go of everything, even my magic. Power swirled in the air. Jace must have felt it, too, because he let out a howl that sounded more like his inner wolf than his human side. It was glorious and amazing. I felt like I was being devoured in the most pleasurable way I could imagine.

Jace rolled me over and entered me from behind, reaching around to massage my clit as he fucked me. I lost track of the number of orgasms crashing through my body. When he took a handful of my hair and pulled, the sweet ache in my scalp sent me into another blissful explosion.

"Oh my god," I mumbled. "Jace, you've got to come. I can't take any more."

"Say it," he hissed, still slamming into me. "Say you want me to claim you. Say it again."

"Claim me, Jace!" I screamed out as yet another orgasm rocked my body.

A moment later, he bit into my shoulder, and my eyes snapped wide open. His teeth piercing my flesh should have been agonizing, should have made me cry out in pain or for help. Instead, a warm surge of magic flooded my body and mind, more powerful and pleasurable than anything that had happened so far.

Jace, teeth still latched onto my shoulder, cried out, and I felt his cock spasm inside me, coming hard, his movements slowing until he collapsed on my back. He wrapped his arms around me, folding my body in an embrace as whatever magical spell his bite had initiated flowed across us both, sealing us together for the rest of our lives. It was like lightning and fire flooding into my veins, and I had to remind myself to breathe. My magic surged and swirled madly, as though whatever change was taking place within me was somehow feeding that part of me.

"Jace, it's amazing," I breathed. "Do you feel it?"

"I do," he said and kissed my ear. "It's the best feeling in the world."

When I caught my breath and the strange sensation of the claiming bite subsided a bit, I rolled over, nuzzling into his chest, basking in the happiness of knowing I was his and he was mine.

Forever.