Chapter 18 Arya

" What the hell is his problem?" Ashlyn muttered, glancing at Tobias over my shoulder a few tables away as we sat in the dining hall for dinner.

I didn't turn my head. I knew I would see that brimstone glower on Tobias's face aimed at my back, and I wasn't in the mood. I just remained hunched over the tuna sandwich I wasn't eating.

"Who even does that? We were only out for a few hours, and we even had Caesar's permission to do so. Talk about major control issues."

I shrugged. "I mean, I guess I get it. He's afraid that something bad is going to happen to me out there. But that's no excuse to go all alpha-hole on me. What does he expect me to do, stay in this fish bowl for the rest of my life?"

"Alpha-hole, nice." Ashlyn snickered. "I wish he would get over himself, already. He obviously has it bad for you, but rather than confess his feelings for you and make whatever this thing is "—she waved her hands in the air in front of me—"between you two official, he's being a bossy, controlling dick wad. "

I dragged my hands down my face. "I so don't care right now. I have enough to worry about with all my training."

"How's that going, by the way?" she asked, and I was immensely grateful for the change of topic.

"Actually, it's going great. I feel so much more confident with the harpy stuff than my mermaid powers. It just seems to come so much easier." I frowned. "Sometimes I think maybe I'm not really a mermaid at all, but then I don't feel more at home anywhere but in the water. It's...weird."

"You never know. You might feel differently when you get to fly as a harpy," she suggested with a shrug. "When are you going to try shifting?"

I snorted. "I'm not ready for that. As a mermaid, I don't really have a choice. Saltwater gets on my skin, and shifting is automatic. I wouldn't know the first thing about trying to shift into something totally new at will. Especially something that's so completely opposite of a mermaid."

"I know better than anyone else at this school what that feels like. I tried so many times to shift and failed. Little did I know all I had to do was die first." Ashlyn laughed, but it didn't reach her eyes. "But it's what we are. It'll happen for you eventually. After all, you're the chosen one." She winked.

"Ugh, don't remind me." I hung my head. "I have my first siren lesson after this. Yet another thing that I have no clue how to do."

"Again, welcome to the club." She raised her soda can in a mock toast. "As an ex-member, I have faith in you." She offered an encouraging smile.

"Thanks." I picked up my sandwich, deciding to eat it quickly so I wouldn't have to feel the heat of Tobias's scowl on the back of my neck.

* * *

My legs wobbled with uncertainty as I entered the music classroom for my first siren lesson with Celeste. The room was empty, of course, but I still felt strange about training for a skill that would assumedly bring about the end of a centuries-old war in the same place where my classmates and I sang choir songs.

Shouldn't this be done in the gym? Or the mer training room?

Celeste was perched at the base of the theater-style steps, and when I looked her way, she patted the spot beside her. I swallowed nervously and walked toward her, taking a seat.

"Have you been drinking plenty of water today?" Celeste asked.

"Umm, yes?" I answered, unsure as to what that had to do with this lesson. I always drank a ton throughout the day, more than what was considered normal for non-mer.

"Good, that should help." She laced her fingers and placed her hands in her lap. "Now, before we start, let's talk about what happened in the alley, when you used your siren voice in front of Hadrian. Can you tell me how it happened? What were you feeling?"

I let out a shaky breath and replayed the incident in my mind. "Well, one of the vampires had gotten hold of Ashlyn and was going to hurt her. I felt so useless, being the only one of my friends who didn't know how to fight, and when I thought she was going to get hurt, I... I refused to let that happen. So I yelled at the vampire to let her go. And he did."

Celeste nodded. "I see. And were there any other times in your past that you might have used your siren voice without knowing it? Any time that you voiced what you wanted and the person did exactly what you said? "

Her question was one I'd been debating for several nights. There had been two other times in her life that I remembered hearing that voice come out of my mouth, that I'd felt that strange vibration throughout my core. The time in the Simulation Room with the fake vampire and the last time I ever spoke to my mother.

"Well, there may have been," I answered. "The night that my mom..." I couldn't finish the sentence. My throat tightened and closed, silencing me. I swallowed and skipped past it. "There was a party with the kids at my school. I had never been to a real party, and I wanted more than anything to go, but my mom, with her silly rules, refused to listen to me, to budge at all. I was so tired of being held back from normal things kids are supposed to do. So I told her to let me go to the party in a voice that wasn't mine, and she did." I looked down at my lap, self-hatred churning like storm clouds inside my gut. "It all seems so stupid now."

I didn't want to tell her about the other incident. It would mean coming clean about the prank, and I just didn't want to deal with that.

Celeste put her hand on my shoulder. "I'm so sorry your last moments with your mother were so tremulous. I had no idea. No wonder you carry such sorrow. But you must learn to forgive yourself someday. Your mother wouldn't want you suffering over it forever. Don't you think?"

I nodded, knowing that forgiving myself wasn't something that would happen any time soon. Shoving it into a box deep inside and ignoring it? That was something I could do, and I was getting damn good at it.

"I've never met a siren," Celeste continued. "In fact, I haven't heard of one in our history for centuries, so little is known about them. About you. But from what you've told me, it seems that your powers stem from your will. The two times you've used your siren voice, you truly wanted the things you asked for. So I think if we want to harness this power of yours, we need to focus on exercising your will. "

"Forgive my ignorance, Celeste, but what can my powers even do?" I asked. "So far, all I've seen them do is control people, make them do things against their will. I don't know if that's something I really want to practice on other people. No one should be forced to do anything they don't want to."

"I'm sorry to say that I know little more than you," she admitted with a shrug, forcing her brilliant red locks to spill over her shoulders. "Yes, they can be used to control people, and that is what they are most known for. But it is said that, at least in the ocean, the siren call can be used to beckon sea creatures. There are some legends that say a siren's voice can even bring back the dead." She snickered at the sight of my eyes bulging. "But we won't bother with such dark magic, I promise you."

"So...how exactly are we going to practice using my siren voice?" I asked, biting my lip. I wasn't at all comfortable with the idea of trying them on Celeste.

Her smile widened, a mischievous twinkle in her emerald eyes. She turned toward the storage closet door and called, "Cora, we're ready for you now."

Cora? What the fuck?

The door opened, and Cora entered the room with her arms crossed under her chest and a scowl on her face. My heart fluttered as Cora came closer, worrying about what was expected to happen.

Was Celeste going to pit us against each other again? As much as I hated Cora, I was not prepared to fight her right now. The next time I sparred with her, I wanted to make sure I could completely kick her Barbie ass.

"Cora is still serving detention for kicking you out of your room in the mer wing," Celeste explained, waving her delicate hand toward Cora. "As one of her sessions, I thought she'd be the perfect person to practice your siren abilities on. "

"Wait, what?" Genuine surprise loosened Cora's default nasty expression, and she dropped her arms to her sides.

"Seriously?" Wicked delight shot through me at this new prospect. Not that I had a clue how to activate my siren voice, but I couldn't ask for a better guinea pig than my bully.

"I foresaw this exchange, and it works out perfectly." Celeste winked at me, ignoring Cora's resistant comments and obvious growing apprehension. "There's something you want from Cora, very much, I should think. Something she owes you."

"I owe her nothing," Cora sneered even as fear darkened her mascaraed eyes.

I couldn't stop the smile from spreading across my face. Cora had been the root of every social problem I had since coming here, and what I wanted deeply was for all her hazing bullshit to stop. Celeste was giving me the opportunity, and permission, to make that happen.

Having made my decision, I rose from the step and approached Cora, concentrating on what it was I wanted. With each step I took closer, Cora tripped backwards, shrinking little by little in fear, until she was backed up against the wall.

Now we were face-to-face, and the vengeful desire was so potent, I could feel the power welling up inside me. My doubts vanished. I knew this would work, and it filled me with impish confidence.

"Apologize to me for the awful shit you've done," I commanded, that familiar yet foreign voice vibrating through my body as it flowed mellifluously past my lips.

Cora's beautiful doll face went blank as the command worked its magic. Then her brows puckered, and she said with full sincerity, "I'm sorry, Arya. I've said so many horrible things about you. I kicked you out of your room. I've turned as many people as I could against you. I even tried to get you severely injured by locking you in the sim room. I blamed you for Letti getting hurt, and even after she woke up and said you were innocent, I still hated you. You didn't deserve any of it. I'm so sorry."

Hearing those words was more satisfying and more healing than I could have ever imagined. I could do so much more. I could destroy her. And for a very tempting moment, I considered doing just that.

But I wouldn't stoop to her level. I was better than her in every way that mattered.

"Forget this apology and return to life as you know it," I ordered with my siren voice. "But the next time you try to hurt or spread rumors about someone, imagine those same things are happening to you."

Cora's eyes remained blank for a few seconds after I stopped talking, then she came back to her senses.

"Please don't hurt me," she begged, wincing, having forgotten the whole ordeal just as I decreed.

"I'm not going to hurt you," I said, taking great satisfaction in her fear of me. "You can go."

Her eyes widened, and she looked over my shoulder at Celeste, who nodded. That was all she needed to scramble out from under my shadow and scurry out of the room.

Celeste stood and looked at me. "You surprised me. You could have ended her hazing once and for all."

"Oh, I wanted to," I confessed. "But I knew it wouldn't mean anything if I forced her to change. This way, she'll have to actually reflect on her actions before she bullies anyone, not just me."

She beamed at me and put her hands on my shoulders. "You are exactly the right person to have the powers of a siren, and I am so proud of you for making a choice even I would've been too selfish to make."

My heart swelled with unexpected pride. Celeste was the only mother figure I had left. That the head mer would say such a thing to me... I almost wanted to cry with joy.

"For our next lesson, I think we'll try using your siren voice in the lake. See if we can't have some fun with our aquatic neighbors," she said with girlish excitement.

"I can't wait," I said honestly.

Now that I knew I could use this voice for good and not just for self-gain, I was eager to see what else it could do. And I couldn't wait to see how well it worked on Cora in the coming days.