Chapter 20

Icouldn't believe my parents had shown up at the wedding. I should have anticipated they'd want to cause a scene. It was what they were best at. We figured out early on that we couldn't have friends or significant others over. Not unless we wanted to be humiliated.

No one else's parents reeked of smoke and alcohol and looked like they hadn't bathed in days.

I wasn't sure I could return to the ballroom. I was embarrassed by their presence. It reminded me of who I really was. I wasn't a man who could be proud of co-owning this inn with my sister. I'd always be the kid from the trailer, the one whose mother berated him and embarrassed him in front of others.

Those were my roots. There was no escaping them. No amount of money would ensure my parents stayed away. They'd always come back, demanding more, ruining everything I'd built.

Maybe it was best if we sold the inn and started off somewhere new, somewhere no one knew my name or who my parents were.

When the feather-light touch landed on my hand, I startled.

Fiona snatched it back. "Sorry, it's just me. I wanted to make sure you were okay."

I pushed off the counter, rage pouring through my body. "I can't believe you thought it was a good idea to post pictures of the wedding on social media. What did you think was going to happen?"

Fiona took a step back. "I was just doing what Marley wanted. I thought your guests would love the images, and maybe you could hold weddings here in the future."

I couldn't even process whether that was a good idea because I was so angry that she'd brought my parents to my doorstep, into the ballroom where my sister's wedding reception was being held. "It was reckless."

"I'm sorry." Fiona's voice was shaky and unsure. "I didn't know that they'd be watching the inn's social media pages or that they'd show up here."

"You had to know. This is what they do." I suspected I was being unreasonable, but I couldn't stop the words from coming out.

"You never introduced me to your parents. You said they were too awful for me to be subjected to them. I know what you told me. But I didn't know them or how they'd react. I promise I didn't know this would happen."

How could she have known? But the logical part of my brain had shut down when I realized it was my parents standing in the entryway to the ballroom. They marred something beautiful. Something I thought was safe from their presence. I didn't expect them to show up here, and I should have. "My mother ruins everything that's good."

I ran a hand through my hair. My mom tried to ruin me and Marley, but we'd survived. We'd come out better than them, but maybe we hadn't.

At least my father had seemed slightly embarrassed by her behavior. Maybe it was seeing Marley dressed up in her wedding gown. She was gorgeous, and I didn't know much about fashion, but I had a feeling her dress was worth a lot of money.

Marley was all class. But I felt like there was this stain on my soul, one I'd never clear away.

"You're not them, you know."

I laughed, but there was no humor in it. "You don't know what you're talking about. You grew up in a loving family. You weren't embarrassed by your trashy parents or picked on because you lived in a trailer."

"Well, no, but you know that says more about those kids then it does you, right?"

I couldn't see anything right now. Every muscle in my body ached. I felt like I'd run a marathon without drinking any water. My heart hurt, my back was tight, and I just wanted to disappear. "You brought my parents here. I can't forget that."

Fiona sucked in a breath, her eyes filling with pain. "You know I didn't do that on purpose."

"Do I?" My voice was cold, but I couldn't bring myself to care. I needed to protect her from me. I needed to push her away before her life was tainted too. "You're just as impulsive as you were when we were nineteen, asking me to marry you."

Her hand went to her chest, and pain flashed across her face. "You can't possibly mean that."

"You need to go. Back to your family and your job."

Fiona had shrunk under the weight of my words, but then she straightened, seemingly gathering courage from somewhere deep inside of her. "I'm sorry about what happened. It was never my intention for them to see it."

I shook my head. "Just go."

Fiona let out a frustrated breath. "I'll leave. But you're going to regret everything you said tonight."

"Don't hold your breath." I forced myself to say and do anything necessary to get her to leave. She needed to be as far away from me as possible. I wouldn't rest until she was gone, until my parents couldn't touch her.

I'd kept them away from her when we were dating as teens, and I wouldn't let them near her now. She was mine to protect. But as she turned on her heels and walked away, I couldn't help but think I'd just lost her forever.

I tried to tell myself it was for the best. We never had a future together. We had moments in time where we could enjoy each other, but we wouldn't work long-term. My family didn't make sense with hers. The inn didn't elevate my worth. I'd always be trailer trash, just like my mom said.

Emmett walked into the kitchen a few minutes later while I was drinking ice water. "You okay? Fiona just walked out with a couple of suitcases."

"You help her to her car?" I asked tightly.

"Talon helped her carry her things out."

My stomach sunk even though it was what I wanted. "Good."

"You don't want to run after her, tell her you're an idiot for whatever you said or did?" Emmett's voice was gruff.

I snorted. "The best thing she could do is leave. She's better off without me."

Emmett sighed long and hard. Then he grabbed two glasses from the cabinet and a bottle of scotch I kept under the sink. He poured two shots, shoving one over to me.

I didn't wait for him to take his; I just threw it back, enjoying the bite of the liquor on my throat. I slammed the glass on the counter. I welcomed the rush.

"You're an idiot. You know that, right?"

"Fuck off." I'd heard he was the asshole Monroe brother. The one who resisted change on the farm and fought his brothers and mother over everything. But right now, I didn't want to talk to anyone.

"I was the first of my brothers to fall in love. When I met Ireland, she was engaged to someone else, but that didn't stop me from wanting her."

I lifted my head, the throbbing a dull ache now due to the alcohol. "Why are you telling me this?"

"Because maybe you need to hear it."

I gestured at him to continue.

"Ireland wanted to hold her wedding on my farm. I said yes, not because I wanted to see her marry someone else but because I wanted her to be happy."

I scowled. "I don't see how this has anything to do with me."

Emmett gave me a hard look before he continued, "On the day of her wedding, her fiancé's girlfriend showed up to tell her that he'd been sleeping with her."

That had my attention.

"Ireland ran from the wedding, and I found her by a waterfall near my cabin. She was dressed in her wedding dress, and she was crying. I wanted to ease her pain." Emmett threw back his shot, then poured another. "I took her to see the pond, and then it started snowing. She was stuck in my cabin for a couple of days."

I whistled. "You still wanted her."

Emmett nodded. "I won't bore you with the details. But she hadn't loved her boyfriend by the end. They'd been doing the long-distance thing, not well obviously. Maybe she thought what we'd shared was some vacation fling, a break from reality, but it was always more for me. When we decided to give the relationship a real shot, I think I panicked. I wasn't used to having a girlfriend or being committed to anyone. When she got too close, I kicked her out of my house. I thought I didn't deserve her. That I wasn't good enough for her."

"You fucked up."

Emmett nodded. "Just like you. I fell back on old limiting beliefs. But the thing is, you are your own person. You are not the house you grew up in or how your parents act. You define the man you are now."

"I thought if I enlisted in the military, I'd be a man worthy of her."

"You still don't think you're worthy of someone like her."

My jaw ached from grinding my teeth.

Emmett held up his hand. "You may not believe me, but think about it. Until you know you're worthy, you won't be." He walked out of the room without another word.

I poured a second shot and drank it. He hadn't helped me. His situation had nothing to do with mine. The alcohol was starting to cloud my brain. I needed to go back to the reception. I stopped in the bathroom to wash my face, then pat it dry.

Upstairs, the party was still going on. Plates of crumbs were on the tables, so I must have missed the cutting of the cake.

As soon as Marley spotted me, she crossed the room. "Is everything okay?"

"I took care of it."

Marley's hands rested on her hips. "You took care of our parents, or you took care of Fiona?"

"Hopefully, we won't see Hank and Shay for a while, and Fiona is staying at her family, where she should have been all along."

Heath walked up in time to hear my last remark. "Fiona left?"

Marley waved a hand in my direction. "Can you believe him?"

Heath had the audacity to chuckle. "Actually, I can. You always fuck everything up before you can get what you want."

I ran a hand through my hair. "I just had a messed-up conversation with Emmett. I think he was trying to help, but he didn't make any sense."

Heath arched a brow. "Emmett talked to you?"

"Something about a runaway bride and thinking he wasn't good enough for her because Ireland was some socialite."

Heath nodded. "Ireland was a trust-fund baby. I'd forgotten about that."

"I'm glad it made sense to you," I said tightly.

"He thought Ireland was better than him. He didn't deserve her, so he pushed her away. Kind of like how you kicked Fiona out and told her to go home."

The hair on my neck stood on end. Had I done the same thing? "I wanted to protect her from my family."

"By not seeing her anymore? By hurting her? How is that protecting her?" Marley started pacing. "You turned down her proposal for the same reason. You wanted to protect her, make her decisions for her. You thought you knew what was best for her, and it sure as fuck wasn't you."

"You got that right."

Heath shook his head. "You're missing the point."

My jaw tightened. "This is your reception. You should be enjoying yourselves."

Marley paused. "I would be enjoying myself if you weren't being such an idiot."

A fast song came over the speakers.

Sarah approached us with a smile, seemingly oblivious to what was going on. She grabbed Marley's hand. "Come dance with us."

Sarah pulled Marley onto the dance floor, leaving me alone with Heath. "Spare me the lecture."

Heath chuckled.

"And stop laughing at me."

"I have to say it's nice being on the other side."

The tension made the muscles in my neck tight. "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"I messed up with Marley too." Heath moved to stand next to me.

"I didn't mess up," I insisted.

"You just kicked the love of your life out of your inn."

I let out a shaky breath. I turned down her proposal, and now I'd kicked her out on Christmas Eve. "I'm an asshole."

Heath shot me a look. "That's what we've been trying to tell you."

"I thought I was shielding her from my parents. If she's not here, they can't hurt her."

"Is that what you said?" Heath asked reasonably.

I winced. "I was angry about her posting pictures on social media. My mom saw it and took it as her invitation to show up here uninvited."

"You blamed Fiona, when that should have rested solely with your parents."

"She can't possibly want me. Not after seeing that public display. That was the Matthews. Who'd want a part of that?"

"Did you let her figure that out for herself, or did you make that decision for her? The same way you said no to her proposal."

"It would have been stupid to quit school and marry me. What did I have to offer her? She would have resented me eventually."

"The point is that you didn't let her make that decision then, and you're not letting her make decisions now."

That caused me to pause. Was I making the same mistake I had last time?

"That's not how relationships work. You're supposed to communicate and come to decisions together. It's never going to work if you unilaterally make all of them for her."

"I didn't think that was what I was doing."

Heath gave me a look. "That's fairly obvious. And I thought I was an idiot."

"Hey," I said with a warning note in my tone.

Heath held up his hands. "I call it like I see it."

If Heath was right, I'd been pushing Fiona away my entire life. I didn't think I was good enough for her, so I protected her by rejecting her before she could realize it. But what if I was wrong? What if I was good enough? What if I wasn't my parents? The headache was in full force again, and I couldn't reach for any of the answers.

"I'm here if you want to talk."

I gestured around the room. "This is your wedding night."

Heath flashed a smile. "You could have what I do. A woman who loves you despite all your flaws."

Had Fiona loved me despite my history and the fuck-ups in my past? All I'd done was make a bigger mistake. Had I messed up the only person that loved me for me? "I think I fucked up."

"That's what I've been trying to tell you."

"What am I going to do?" The panic clawed at my throat.

"You're going to take some time to think about what you want, and if it's her, and you're willing to do whatever's necessary to get her back, then we can talk about it."

I raised a brow. "You're going to be on your honeymoon."

"I'm around tomorrow," Heath said.

"On Christmas." I didn't want to be apart from Fiona on the holiday, but I was the one who'd pushed her away. She'd already planned to spend it with her family. It would give me time to think.

"What else are you doing? Besides wallowing."

"Marley said I could join you, but you're hanging out with the Monroes. They aren't my family."

Heath frowned. "You're my family, and everyone is welcome."

"Even a Calloway?" I asked, thinking about what would happen if I managed to get Fiona back.

With a rueful grin, he said, "We didn't kick Cole out yet. Although at this point, I think the Monroes would prefer to keep Daphne and Izzy and do without Cole."

"We'll see." I had things to figure out, and I wasn't exactly in a holiday mood. I couldn't remember the last time I'd spent it with anyone other than my fellow soldiers.

Heath hooked an arm around my neck and pulled me into his chest. "I'm not letting you spend it alone. So get that out of your head."

I twisted away from his grasp. "Knock that shit off."

"We're brothers now. I get to treat you like one."

"Don't you have enough brothers?" I asked, thinking of the four he already had.

"I could use one more. Besides, I feel sorry for you. You're obviously incapable of getting in touch with your emotions."

"Like you're good with that?" I asked him incredulously.

"I just married the love of my life. I'd say I am," Heath said as Marley returned to his side, and a smile spread over his face.

"Aria said it's time for us to make our exit," Marley said with her hand on his chest and her shoulder tucked under his arm.

Heath grinned. "I'm all for that."

The two of them were staying at their cabin tonight, and Charlotte had checked into a room at the inn so they could have privacy. I had a feeling Charlotte would be living at the inn for a while. She wouldn't want to impose on them.

"Take care of her," I said, my throat tight with emotion.

Heath looked up at me and tightened his grip on my sister's shoulders. "I told you I would."

"Just making sure."

"Are you two good?" Marley asked, looking from me to her husband.

"Couldn't be better. Aiden's going to dig his head out of his ass sometime tomorrow and call us to work on a plan to get his woman back."

A smile spread over Marley's face. "Perfect. I adore Fiona."

"I do too." It just took me a ridiculously long time to figure everything out.

Marley hugged me tightly. "I want you to be happy."

I shouldn't make any promises, even though I wanted to assure her that everything would be okay. "I will be."

The guests lined up on either side of the doorway on the front porch. When Marley and Heath came outside, we threw red flower petals at them. Marley laughed when Heath lifted her into his arms and carried her bridal-style across the porch and down the steps.

I opened the passenger-side truck door for them, and he tucked her inside. When he closed the door, I couldn't help but think that leaving in Heath's truck was perfect for them. Marley adored expensive things, but she also loved Heath for who he was, Christmas tree farm and all.

Surely, Fiona would accept me for who I was and be patient while I worked through the shit from my past.