12. Cassandra

CHAPTER 12

Cassandra

" H ow was your call with Zachariah?" I asked when Talon padded back into my chambers. It was the second call he'd been able to make in the last two weeks.

I made sure to close the door behind him before he shifted back into his vampiric form.

A muscle in Talon's jaw flexed, something weary in his eyes. He slid on a pair of sweats as he shook his head. "Nothing new to note." His voice had an irritated tone to it that made me swallow hard.

"Has something happened?" A pit opened up in my stomach at the thought of more innocents being killed by the Sons of Honor, no doubt with the support of my eldest brother, and quite possibly my mother.

"No," he said. "Thankfully."

I furrowed my brow. "Then why do you look so upset?"

"I'm not," he said in anything but a believable tone.

"I know you're not hungry," I said feeling nothing but irritation rattling down that connection of ours. "Did Zachariah scold you because we haven't been able to get any information?"

Talon started pacing, as if the irritated energy inside him was too much to take standing still.

"I know it's been a month since we've arrived here," I continued, my words borderline rambling. "I know that it's been awful and it's hard to see if it's worth it since we don't have any information. I can understand how that would upset Zachariah, but even if Edward shows up tomorrow, it'll be worth?—"

"But he's not here," Talon snapped. His gaze was predator-like, his pupils slightly blown as he stared at me. "He's not here, Cassandra. He hasn't been here. There has to be a reason why, when all of our intelligence said he was coming here frequently."

I tilted my head, anger rippling beneath my skin. "And why does it sound like you think I have something to do with that?"

His lingering curious stare was enough to make clarity snap in my mind.

"Ah," I said, disappointment making my heart sink. "I see. Zachariah got in your head. I can understand why the leader of your hunter pack doesn't trust me. But you ? How can you not trust me by now? After what you've seen. After what we've..." My voice trailed off as I sucked in a breath.

I was a ridiculously foolish girl.

Allowing my hopes to fly when it came to this male. I'd thought we'd at least come to a mutual respect and trust with each other, especially after all the feeding and fucking and shared experiences we'd been having lately.

We'd had endless talks that lasted well past dawn, sharing histories and commiserating on things that we didn't even know we had in common. I'd started to envision things beyond the island that included Talon.

A life filled with wicked fights and even more delightfully wicked makeups. I couldn't believe I'd allowed myself to feel for this male when it was clear he wasn't even close to being on the same page.

The anger seemed to spill out of Talon, his shoulders dropping as his muscles relaxed, those blue eyes softening slightly. "I... I..."

"I've never seen you at a loss for words before, Talon," I snapped. "Whatever you have to say, just say it. It's fine if feeding and release and a common mission was all this was ever going to be. I was just a little taken off guard because I thought I'd earned your respect and trust by now. But one phone call from your leader and all of that is so easily crumbled. It must've not been that strong of a foundation to begin with."

I clung to that anger to help bury the loss I already felt. Chided myself for ever getting attached to someone I never really thought I could hang on to in the first place.

I shouldn't be surprised or shocked, especially since the sensation wasn't new to me. Rejection, loss. It was literally my lot in life.

Talon spanned the distance between us, but I took a step back, not wanting to fall prey to the physical chemistry we couldn't deny.

He had the gall to look hurt by my retreat.

"I'm sorry," he said, and my eyebrows rose at those two words. I'm sure he wasn't used to saying them. He shrugged, sliding his hands into the pockets of his sweats as if it would stop him from reaching for me. "It's difficult denying the concerns of someone I've trusted my entire existence."

"I can understand that," I said, folding my arms over my chest like that could protect my heart.

My heart which only I now realized was in pain . The kind of pain that made me even angrier. He had no right to hurt me like this, and I had no right to have allowed him in enough to do so.

"But I argued with him," he continued. He stepped closer, and I didn't retreat. "I argued with him, Cassandra," he said again. "I never argue with Zachariah when it comes to a mission. I've never had to, but we are of conflicting minds on this one."

I swallowed around the knot in my throat. "On whether I'm trustworthy or not," I said.

Talon dipped his head, which was confirmation enough, and I shook mine.

"I don't know what else it's going to take to get you and your pack of hunters to trust me. I've managed to earn the trust of most of the assassins and their mates. Short of letting Alek fully into my mind and giving him access to every single one of my memories, even the ones I've never shared with anyone but you, what else can I possibly do?" I asked, unfolding my arms and letting my hands smack against my thighs, the frustration vibrating from my very bones. "Will it take me murdering my own mother or summoning my brother here under false pretenses so you can kill him before we even have a chance to get information? Not that he would come even if I somehow made him believe I was in danger, because he doesn't care about me. No one does. I was abandoned at that court and Alek could have easily killed me and he didn't and yet still you don't trust me?—"

Talon embraced me, his powerful hands on either side of my face as he held my gaze. "I'm here with you," he said, emotion making his voice sound raw. "My trust is limited…not because of you, but because of my mistakes in the past. Ones I've shared with you. I lived with my brother for centuries and never once suspected him of the betrayal he dealt us. I'm sorry that my issues with opening up and trusting people are coming down hard on you, but I'm here . I have not left. I have not abandoned you to this mission alone. And I will not," he said. "I will not leave you. Not because I'm being ordered to by our king, or out of some need to watch you. I will not leave you because I can't ."

Tears threatened to blur my vision, but I held them back.

"I think it would've been less terrifying if you would've just said you were waiting to kill me." I released a dark laugh, and Talon joined in, the tension between us breaking as he softly pressed his lips against mine.

The kiss wasn't out of a desperate need for release or because of an itch he couldn't scratch. It was tender and comforting and that scared me.

"I think it would have been less terrifying if you would've tried to murder me in my sleep any one of these nights we've been here," he countered.

I looked up into his eyes, unable to express the emotions storming through my soul in that moment.

"What do we do now?" I finally asked.

"We carry out the mission," he said matter-of-factly. "And the rest?" He shrugged. "I'm here. You're here. We take it one night at a time. I know that's not exactly fair to you, but it's all I have to offer."

The smallest of smiles shaped my lips as I shifted against him, smoothing my palms over his muscled chest. "So I get to play with a snarky vampire Viking with trust issues?"

"Don't forget gods-like in bed," he added.

I laughed. "I could never forget that," I said, shaking my head.

He slid his arms around me, drawing me flush against him, holding me in an embrace that had nothing to do with our need for each other.

I rested my cheek against his chest, sighing heavily. "When we get off this island," I said. "I think I'd like to go to a cabin somewhere, surrounded by mountains and forests, not another soul for miles."

"That sounds divine," he said. "Am I invited?"

I shifted my head to look up at him. "Do you want to be?"

He smoothed some of my hair back and nodded.

"I suppose we'll both have to survive this war first," I said.

"I've survived many wars," he responded. "I have no intention of dying in this one."

"So, a cabin in the woods? It's a date?"

"It's a date," he said, and then bent down to seal the promise with a kiss.