Chapter 1

The flight here was somber. Laney hardly said a word, just stared out the window until the jet landed. Even then, she held back. Laney’s usually so full of light, but when Evie called to tell us what happened to Nessa, her brightness dimmed.

“She’s going to pull through,” I tell Laney as we exit the plane.

She just shakes her head, tears welling in her eyes.

“But what about the baby?”

My eyes widen, making me nearly miss the final step. Adrian catches me just in time though. My man is always looking out.

“Did you just say baby ?” I ask.

Laney rolls her lips as she wipes a tear from her face. The cars we are taking should be here any minute. “I was going to tell everyone at dinner, but then Evie called…”

Oh shit. Poor Ness.

My heart hurts for her. Adrian and I have been hoping to grow our family for a while now. Me being trans, we were hoping to have a biological child, but the hormone therapy involved could have put my health at risk.

Receiving that news shattered the picture we hoped for, but we’re excited about looking to grow our family through adoption instead.

I can’t help but imagine what it would be like to lose a child. I immediately feel a bone-deep pain accompanying the thought, but I won’t let it take hold because that helps no one right now.

Instead, I force myself to look at what I can do. When Nessa makes it out of this, we’ll all be here for her. Until then, we need to hold everything else together.

“What can we do?” I ask Laney, laying a hand on her shoulder as Havoc pulls her into him.

She sniffles but stands a little taller as two cars park in front of us.

“I need you, Adrian, and Havoc to go to the house with Damien and Lev. They have over forty traumatized kids there that are going to need some help. Damien’s alpha team is there, but they are trained to defend, not to babysit.”

I give her a soft smile before walking to our black Mercedes.

“Don’t worry, I’ll flash them that Akio charm and all their worries will fade away.”

Laney’s lips lift, but not all the way. She’s my best friend, almost as close as a sister. Seeing her hurt makes me want to burn down a building or send Adrian to blow something up so we can bask in the heat of the flames.

“I’m sure they will love you,” Laney says, opening the door to her bright pink Bentley. Havoc kisses her on the cheek before coming to our car. “Who knows, Akio, one of them could be your future kid.”

Hope surges in me at the thought of finally starting our family. Adrian and my’s decision to adopt was difficult. We don’t have a hero complex, or desire to rescue a child to make their life sunshine and rainbows. Being part of an assassin organization that keeps the underworld in check means we know all too well how dark the world can be.

Settling on the decision to adopt came with a lot of counsel from Dr. K. She used to work in adoption, and gave us a lot to consider about the process. While she once said it was her greatest love, she has also told us it brought about some of the biggest heartbreaks she has ever faced.

Seeing a child forced into someone else’s mold because they weren’t accepted as they are is one of the most painful things she has witnessed.

Adrian and I have used her guidance to set realistic goals and expectations for ourselves, as well as our future child. Adoption is hard, but there is a special kind of joy to be there and fight alongside them. One thing my partner and I agree on is that we’re prepared to fight for our future child just as hard as we have fought for each other.

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We arrive at a massive property with a resort style building at the center. Gardens and flowers frame the road as we approach, giving it a quaint, fairytale vibe, despite its size.

Damien meets us at the door and ushers us in. “It’s chaos, but they are all really great kids,” he says, greeting us all with a huge hug.

“What can we do?” I ask.

Damien looks around, exhaustion clear on his features.

“All of the older kids are fairly settled. The problem is the younger ones. I can’t seem to get them to shower.”

Dr. K walks in at that moment. She took a different flight and I’m shocked she was able to get here around the same time as us.

“What seems to be the problem?” she asks Damien.

“Hey,” he grins at her before picking her up in the biggest hug. Dr. K pats his back gently but seems relieved when he finally sets her down. Damien’s still learning boundaries.

“A few of the kids won’t shower, two boys and two girls. The girls started screaming as soon as we turned on the water, and the boys tried to run and hide. Az helped me get them back in the bathroom, but I have no idea what the problem is.”

A young boy approaches; he looks like he could hardly be eight or nine. He’s hesitant to speak at first, but seems to steal himself with courage.

“Pokey is scared of the water because the guards used it as a form of punishment for the little ones. They hit us older kids, but the little ones were tortured with frigid water. Sometimes they would push their faces into buckets of it, others they would force them to stand against the wall while it was freezing as they sprayed them with a lot of force.”

I crouch down to meet him on his level. I hate that these kids have already been through so much, but this one opening up so quickly is a good sign.

“Thank you for telling us. Do you think you could help us earn their trust?”

He nods, then looks back up at Damien. “Kai promised to kill the man who did this to us. Are you going to help?”

Damien looks to Dr. K who comes to crouch down by me.

“We’re going to do everything in our power to ensure you’re safe and well cared for.”

He blinks at her for a minute before she asks, “What’s your name?”

“Isaiah.” He looks at me then, a hint of mischief in his eyes. “I’ll help you if you help Kai.”

This seems like a trick, but the poor kid deserves a little revenge, so I answer for everyone here.

“I don’t know who Kai is, but my priority is making sure those that hurt you will be punished. That I can promise you.”

He seems to take that better and dips his head in agreement.

“Let’s go,” Adrian nods to Damien, who leads the way down a long hall.

When Dr. K is just out of earshot, Adrian leans in.

“I don’t know if encouraging kids to kill their parents is the best idea,” he whispers.

I look back at him. “Would you kill yours for what they did to us, or mine for what they did to me?”

Not only did my parents openly judge and shame me for my transition, but in the end, they chose their beliefs over their child and exiled me. Adrian’s parents were no better, but they still believed our ‘confusion’ would fade and that he would return to them.

They have no idea that we’ve killed for each other. That our love is what makes us happy above all else. The acceptance and peace we feel with one another is otherworldly.

The day Adrian’s parents sent a man to kill me was the day he cut them off forever. My mother’s goodbye to me was a text saying she was required to side with my father and that she wishes me the best.

I don’t wish death upon my mother, but my father banishing me from my birthright to rule the Triads, is something I hope karma really kicks him in the ass for.

However, I would kill Adrian’s parents without hesitation. They’re lying, conniving people that thought I was the poisonous one, but in truth, they’re the real evil.

Adrian stares at me for a moment, and I raise my eyebrows in response.

“Exactly. I’ll promise them whatever, do whatever is needed to make them feel safe again.”

He sighs, but I can see he agrees. “And I’ll do the same.”

We enter the bathroom to find two little girls sitting in a ball next to Az and two boys up against the wall. Isaiah immediately walks to the boys, and the smaller one reaches for him. He picks him up and holds him close.

“They’re not going to hurt you, okay?” Isaiah says.

The two boys glance between us and him. “Are they safe?” the one they call Pokey asks.

Isaiah nods. “They’re safe.”

“You managed to get them to put on bathing suits, that’s a good first step,” Dr. K tells Damien.

“They needed something that wasn’t falling off of them. They agreed easily to that. It’s when the water turns on that things get difficult,” Damien informs us.

After a little coaxing and a lot of reassurance from Isaiah, he and Damien are able to get the boys into the large shower. Before we know it, they are playing games and splashing in the water, laughter bouncing off the tiled walls. However, the two girls remain next to Az, still looking skeptical.

An idea hits me as I watch them. Getting up, I grab one of the cups from the sink and take it to the shower, filling it with water making sure that they can see each one of my movements.

As I get closer to the girls, they try to shrink away as if I were about to toss the water on them. Holding up my hands, I approach slowly but steadily and sit a little bit away from them.

“It’s warm,” I say, as I reach out with the cup in my hand. They make no move to touch it, their gazes frantically moving from me to the cup with wide and terrified eyes, emphasizing the whites around their pale green irises. I am sure that the guards were mostly men, so seeing three guys in here is probably intimidating for them.

“Try setting the cup down,” Adrian suggests, so I place it on the floor between us. Adrian sits next to me and slowly nudges it towards them.

“Safe,” he says before dipping a finger in. “Warm.”

The girls look so small, delicate even, but it is easy to see they are carbon copies of one another. One holds a stuffed bunny to her chest and the other has a hand on it while they lean on Az. The dog looks like he is in heaven under their attention.

“Do you like dogs?” I ask.

The girl farthest from me narrows her eyes at me skeptically, but the other nods, lips tilting with the smallest of smiles.

“I bet he’ll get in the shower with you. Az loves to play in the water.”

The girls exchange a look, and I turn to Damien.

“Can Az get in?” I ask.

“If it helps them, of course.” He peeks his head around the shower wall, his hair dripping on the tiles as he grins at the girls. “Az likes to run under the spray super fast.”

Their eyes widen almost comically before they look at Az and smile. However, they make no move towards the showers.

Dr. K comes to sit next to us, and they seem to relax a little more in her presence, which doesn’t surprise me. She seems to have that effect on everyone.

“Do you want to play bubbles with Az?” she asks.

They don’t answer, looking at her as if they don’t understand what she is saying.

“Bubbles,” Dr. K says before grabbing some soap and making bubbles on her skin with the warm water in the cup.

The girl who is closer to me reaches out her hand and rubs over the bubbles on Dr. K’s arm.

“B-bubbles,” she repeats hesitantly, her voice raspy from lack of use.

Damien turns around to us. “They don’t know a lot of words. That is Ami and her sister is Ani. Apparently, they were sold when they were very little.”

My heart thumps violently in my chest at the knowledge. These poor girls don’t deserve a life of pain and fear like this.

“Bunny,” I point to the stuffed animal between them, and they both nod.

“Do you both want a bunny of your own?”

They look at the dirty toy and grip it tight.

“It is likely a sense of safety for them,” Dr. K explains. “Once they believe they are safe here, they will probably let it go and find another item that reminds them of this place instead.”

I make it my mission to get them new bunnies that make them feel safe.

It takes a lot of persuading and bubbles, but eventually we convince the girls to clean up with a warm washcloth. It’s a far cry from what they need, but it was a good starting point according to Dr. K.

Adrian brushes Ami’s light brown hair, and Ani lets me brush hers. I take my time removing the knots and adding in a little detangler before braiding it into a long braid.

Ami looks back when I’m done, and her eyes widen in awe.

“Princess,” she says as she points to her sister.

Ani smiles and shyly tucks her head down.

“Do you want to be a princess too?” Adrian asks Ami. She thinks for a minute, and then scoots over to sit in front of him.

“Dinosaur,” Ami insists.

I laugh as Adrian’s panicked eyes meet mine. He doesn't want to disappoint her, but he can hardly braid hair, much less do something that would look like a dinosaur.

“Ami, would it be okay if I tried?” I ask. She looks at Adrian then at me.

“Hand,” she says to Adrian, reaching for him.

I notice she squeezes tightly as he takes it before looking back at me. The sight of her tiny hand in his large one makes my heart melt and clench simultaneously.

“Okay,” her sweet voice says. Her grip on Adrian refuses to loosen, even as she moves over towards me.

Az is still sitting here with us while Damien left to help get the boys into their pajamas. Dr. K went with them because the little one had a meltdown when the water shut off.

Ani sits next to her sister while I grab a few green-colored plastic hair bands and a comb. I have always loved to work on hair, and am honored that these girls seem to trust me enough to help with theirs.

It might have taken three hours for them to speak to us, but it seems like Ami is really trying. She is definitely the braver one of the two, while Ani quietly observes everything before making her own decisions.

Sitting on the floor behind her, I take small twists of her hair and fan them out to look like spikes going down her head. When I glance over at Adrian, Ani is dozing off with her head comfortably in his lap.

My eyes mist over at the way he looks at her, running gentle fingers soothingly down her cheek.

Somehow, these girls have already wormed their way into our hearts, and I have a feeling they won’t be leaving anytime soon.

As soon as I finish and show Ami the results in the mirror, she squeals and hugs me.

“Rawr!” she shouts, waking Ani with a startle. Adrian helps Ani stand just as Dr. K walks in.

“Would you like to come pick out some warm pajamas?” she asks them.

They nod and take her hands, walking away happily as Adrian and I stand together in equal amounts of awe and sorrow.

“They’re perfect,” he whispers.

“And starting to trust us.”

He nods, emotions welling in his eyes that I don’t often see. “I love you,” he says before pulling me in for a kiss.

The moment we break apart, I rest my head on his shoulder as his arms wrap around me.

“I love you too.”

After changing into dry clothes, we get back to the main area where the kids are huddled together on the living room floor.

“What’s going on?” I ask Havoc and Lev, who seem just as perplexed as we do.

“They don’t want to go to the rooms,” Lev says.

Dr. K comes in then and looks around, recognition softening her eyes. “They don’t feel safe here yet. Can we bring mattresses down here?”

“Forty of them?” Havoc asks.

“Don’t be dramatic,” Lev says, chiding him with a slap to his chest. “Some of the older ones are in a few rooms, but none of them wanted to be alone, so they chose the ones with bunk beds.”

“How many beds do we need to bring down here?” Adrian asks.

“Probably fifteen. The couches fold out and a few have said they want to stay together.”

Adrian and I nod as we make our way to the bedrooms and begin bringing down beds and blankets. Some of the bigger kids help while the little ones ride the mattresses down the stairs, their squeals of laughter ringing in our ears.

Seeing them smiling and playing seems to erase some of the bloody and violent memories it’s taken to get here.

“Any news on Ness?” I ask Damien once things begin to settle. His face falls as he glances at his phone.

“She’s still in surgery. Dr. K’s leaving soon to head over there.”

His frown sets me on edge. “Damien?”

He shakes his head. “How many times can we survive these things? How many battles can we fight and walk away unscathed before one of us has to pay the ultimate price?”

I rest a hand on his shoulder and squeeze.

“As many as it takes, and when we reach the end of the line, we keep fighting.”

The two little girls who’ve stolen my heart come running over to us wearing adorable pink and blue princess pajamas with Az right on their heels.

“Play?” they ask at the same time.

Just knowing they want to spend time with us has my heart feeling a little less heavy.

“This,” I whisper to Damien, gesturing to the once somber twins, “this is why we will fight until our very last breath.”

He smiles down at the girls as they bring us a box of toys.

“For them,” Adrian says as he sits down on the ground to work on a puzzle with Ani. Ami hands me a dinosaur and makes a growling sound that has me chuckling.

For them.