12. Cross

“We should’ve left her there. She’s trouble,” Lev says the minute a soft sigh parts Leni’s lips. She’s curled up into herself on the chair, arms wrapped tightly around her body, head shoved between her knees. Her eyes are softly closed, sealing out the world.

Leaving her wasn’t an option. Not since I cut through that Gorgon’s heart and sweet honeysuckle mixed with bitter salt filled my nose and clouded my judgment. I might not have been raised with creatures but even mortals have their myths about blood and fate.

Naturally, the Gods forged it into a weapon. A defense mechanism to stun and disorient.

Who wouldn’t stumble if they smelled their soulmate in the middle of a battlefield, who wouldn’t panic and falter?

The first waft of Leni’s scent shredded my control.

I’m not a descendent of the Gods. I shouldn’t have a soulmate, the laws of nature do not apply to abominations.

But there she is.

Marvelously beautiful, and intent on killing me.

“Really?”

I peel my eyes off Leni to look at Lev. “She’d have frozen to death if we left her.”

“Not if we left her in the water,” he deadpans, taking the seat across the aisle from her, spinning it to face me. “And you wouldn’t be bleeding right now. Wouldn’t be shot.”

“I’ve been shot plenty.”

“And how many times have you had to stitch yourself up? You’re distracted, and it’s weakening you.”

I avoid his scowl. “I overexerted.”

“It’s fucking both, and it’s because of her. You need to be away from her, you need to concentrate and conserve your energy. At least until you heal.”

When Lev looks at Leni, I can see the mess she’s become. Swimming in my smoked out, blood crusted shirt, skinned knees, ash in her hair.

“Her?” he asks in disbelief. “She’s your type? A coward who runs at the first sign of danger? She’s pathetic.”

A muscle twitches in her cheek.

I level Lev a hard look, swatting back a dozen rebuttals to keep from riling him further. “Not everyone craves violence.”

“But we do,” Lev insists fiercely, clenching his fist so tightly his knuckles turn white. “Kadmos created us for it.”

“We were created to instill peace. Fighting was a means to an end, never the purpose.”

Lev leans back, folds thick arms over his chest. “Does she know that you loathe creatures like her?”

She has no idea how I feel about her. “Go punch something, Mikhailov, you’re an asshole when you’re wound up.”

He ignores me, pushes. “A slutty fucking outfit, a couple guns pointed at her, you’re just as bad as Atlas with the hero complex. We’re not heroes anymore.”

“Stop it,” I cut him off with a growl.

But he doesn’t know when to quit. “If you’re so desperate, Sin can get you a Nymph with tattoos realer than those.”

“Enough, Mikhailov.” I’m losing my patience, tapping my foot.

“What do you even know about her?” He’s petulant. A child throwing a fit. “Fuck, just look at her. I—”

“You’re jealous,” I snap.

Lev’s face floods with color, his eyes bulging slightly as he swallows hard.

Instant, bitter regret coats the back of my teeth. Now, would be one of those moments wings shearing off a plane would be considered a silver lining.

I love Lev, but he’ll never be anything but a brother to me, regardless of his infatuation. It’s been over a century since either one of us has acknowledged it, except this time I’m not apologizing, I’m not telling him how flattered I am, how he deserves better than me. This time I’m angry.

Because Leni doesn’t deserve his vitriol.

Not after I unloaded mine.

I clench my jaw, frustration boiling inside me. He’s not wrong, despite his delivery. Leni’s managed to pull my attention away from my mission and it can’t go on any longer.

Blacking out in the street, losing control in the ring, fighting with Lev—inconveniences compared to what’s really at stake. Throwing my shadows to warm her drained me. My ribs haven’t healed since the Ballasts, and I’ll run out of thread before I staunch the bleeding. Worst of all, the curse roils under my skin, pinching and prodding, disgruntled, gnawing at me for attention.

I should’ve demanded answers from her. Does she know about us? Is that why she found me? Is that why she put me in the Ballasts? Is she trying to haunt my every thought?

Does she know it will kill me?

Instead, I let her take over my jet, sit in my seat, wear my clothes.

Certainly not a hero, not even enough of a gentleman left in me to allow her to wear something other than the blood that connects us.

Dooms me.

I’d have rather spent an hour in Drake’s thumbscrews than suffer her soft look of reverence. So, I put a stop to it. Inhaling honeysuckle and letting free the worst of my deeds like confession was listed as the in-flight entertainment.

“You told me you’d never lose focus,” Lev accuses, dry. Distant. Hating me.

I’m an asshole. “I did.”

I remain silent. Consider apologizing or explaining.

Explain fucking what? The Gods have ordained that Leni’s my missing piece. She will bring me calm and happiness and we’re destined to be effortlessly, unconditionally in love.

Except the same, capricious Gods cursed me to die if I veer from the path of vengeance.

Even now, my gift defies me. Shadows climb up the arms of Leni’s chair, pooling over her legs in a dark blanket in an attempt to erase any memory of me and send her running.

It’s like being gifted the sun and only ever burning under it.

She lied to me. Told me I was being hunted, but the truth is out now, isn”t it? She”s being hunted, and she chose me for her shield?

Ignore the ridiculous surge of pride and satisfaction.

“The fire,” I grunt. New topic. Safe topic.

Lev hums, as if disinterested, but he’s clenching his teeth like he doesn’t want them anymore. “Which?”

Good question.

Leni’s breathing is so slow, I wait for her next breath before I speak. “The fire at the palace.” If he wants me to focus, let’s fucking focus. “Was it to cover tracks or meant to kill?”

I trace a blurry tattoo on Leni’s elbow with my eyes, unable to shake the feeling she’s involved in all this.

An incredibly intelligent arsonist, who, whether or not she meant to, referenced the royal library. Who knows Drake and found me.

Too many coincidences.

Kadmos had a weakness for captivating creatures. He would’ve welcomed her with open arms.

Except in the market, she’d accused me of killing the king.

Good tactic to avoid suspicion.

The pieces are starting to come together in my mind, but there’s still a missing link.

Draven. Why is the name familiar to me? I comb through my files and come up empty.

Lev’s gaze flicks between Leni and me, his unspoken displeasure hanging heavy in the air. “Fire’s a coward’s way to kill.”

“Too messy,” I agree. “That’s the issue. It’s impossible to guarantee death when the proof of it is a lack of evidence.”

He nods, tapping his fingers. Contemplating. This is as far as we’d gotten in years. An actual lead. I’m supposed to be excited, not swimming in dread.

Lev’s brows slam down. “So then he didn’t burn?”

“I don’t know. The opposite doesn’t make sense either. Mythical black flames to cover fingerprints? A scent? That’s a lot of effort.”

Or not. Leni destroyed an entire block of illegal activity while on her knees, dabbing blood from my hands.

I should tell Lev that she started the fire. But before I can say anything, Leni flinches and her eyes scrunch so tight her lashes imprint on her cheeks. Her body jerks suddenly, her shoulders coiling in tension. Her features contort, and I can almost see the nightmare she’s ensnared in.

Without thinking, I reach for her hand. I’m not a soother. I don’t bring peace, but she clings to me desperately. Her nails dig into my skin, but I don’t care. All I want is to protect her from whatever lives in her nightmares.

Lev’s warning breaks through my thoughts like a siren. “You’re playing a dangerous game. Atlas will pop a blood vessel when he sees the state she’s left you in.”

He’s right. Again. But I can’t ignore this pull towards Leni, this inexplicable need to keep her safe. “She needs help.”

“The entire realm needs help. Why her?”

“She remembers me.”

Glued to our interlocked fingers, Lev’s hazel eyes are sad. He rubs his forehead. “It’s enough for me,” he whispers. “But you have thirty minutes to come up with a more compelling reason for the others.”

I have it. Painted across her shirt. I’m just not sure I want to admit it.

If she killed the king, I won’t be able to shield her from anyone—myself included.

I hold her through the landing, let her squeeze as the wheels glide onto the tarmac. Lev scolds me with silence.

I can’t let go. Won’t, now that she’s finally stopped trembling and her breathing has slowed, yet her grip has only gotten tighter.

Does she recognize me? Even in her sleep? Is that possible?

Lev unbuckles with the seatbelt sign, and when he talks, his sincerity is at odds with the grind of his thumb into my barely healed shoulder. “Regardless of what you tell Atlas.” He pushes down and searing pain bolts down my arm to lick fire at my fingertips. “You need to hold it together. Or she won’t need a knife to kill you.”