Chapter 4

FOUR

ALEXA

It comes as no surprise Beau has been avoiding me like the plague.

We fucked up, crossed the line, and ruined this perfect friendship we have.

All because I wanted revenge.

The campus is big, but not big enough to avoid crossing paths with your man bestie after a one-night stand. Everywhere I turn, my eyes play tricks on me as if I see him. Until the one time I do, down the corridor, only for him to turn away so fast, like he can’t stand to look at me. It hurts knowing there’s this—whatever you want to call it—between us.

What the hell was I thinking?

There was no rational thinking, only me hurt by Hunter’s actions. One wrong move by one person can start a chain of events, like a domino effect, and change everything.

As much as it hurts not to be talking to Beau right now, a small part of me is relieved he’s been avoiding me. The time alone forces me to process my thoughts, all of which lead back to the same thing.

Having sex with Beau was bad, yet oh so good. At least, from what I remember. Parts of the night are a blur, but the way Beau felt inside me, not so much. The memory is very much alive.

And that’s why the struggle is real.

With him, I felt like myself, able to let go of all inhibitions which led to the best orgasm of my life. Though, it’s been a while. Was it the best or has it been so long I forgot just how good it feels to be pleasured by a man?

I’ve never looked at him in any other way. He’s been this rock for me, someone who is my security blanket in this big world I sometimes feel alone in.

Sure, occasionally I wonder how things are so easy with him, and maybe there’s a reason why like it’s a sign. But I’m quick to shut down those thoughts, scolding myself for even thinking about crossing the boundary just because he feels safe.

Too late now.

I chose not to breathe a word to anyone, keeping my promise as our little secret.

Two weeks of radio silence and me studying as if my life depended on it, the night of Nikki’s birthday finally came around.

“Would you hold still? You’re like a puppy locked up in a cage,” Eric complains while trying to fix the back of my dress.

“I’m not sure whether to be offended or flattered. Puppies are cute.”

“Darling…” Eric smiles with such grace, “… your gene pool is the best I’ve ever seen. You’re not cute. You’re stunning. But right now, stand still!”

Despite my annoyance over Eric being a control freak with everyone’s styling, I have to give it to him, he chooses very beautiful dresses. His eye for detail is next level, plus he knows exactly what colors and styles match everyone’s skin tone and shape.

The dress he chose for me is a rust color, not my usual color to wear, but I love it. It has a dainty sweetheart neckline, faux corset detail, and side waist cut-outs, making it open back. The fabric shimmers like satin but is much thicker, which is great, so my nipples don’t blind everyone.

Eric found matching Manolo Blahniks to compliment the dress. The only thing left is my hair. Luckily, he hasn’t commented on how I’m leaving in out in soft waves.

“We’re almost done,” he says, fixing the back.

“So, I guess everyone is coming tonight?”

“Everyone.”

“Right…” I breathe out, knowing I’ll have no choice but to face Beau tonight. “Sounds like fun.”

“My god, woman, what is going on with your tatas?”

I glance down. “Why, what’s wrong with them?”

“They’re extra full and perky. Every straight man’s dream.”

“Oh, yeah. Well, I’ve been in study mode, so pigging out on junk. Yesterday, I ate a footlong meatball sub. I have never liked meatballs in my life.”

“I love a good Italian meatball.”

“Yeah, they’re quite nice—”

“And an Australian meatball, nice and juicy,” Eric interrupts as he glances at the window like he’s dreaming about something which makes him happy.

Then, I remember it’s Eric.

“Ew, are you talking about actual meatballs or men?”

“Honey cakes, I’m vegan.”

“Really?” I question with raised brows. “I saw you eat a steak last time we were at dinner.”

“It depends on who I was trying to impress. I’ll order the steak if the waiter is bulky with good arms. You know, makes me seem manly.”

I close my eyes while shaking my head. “Oh God…”

“Now, if he’s young and fresh looking, I like to order vegan. Makes me very in with the times.”

“But do you tell them you’re vegan?”

“I wouldn’t say I tell them as such. I just talk about saving the animals and then somehow find out if they’re a top or bottom.”

A laugh escapes me, causing me to choke.

“So, back to meatballs, I think you’ve put me off now. I’ve just been in a bit of a funk. I’m sure it’s just a phase.”

Eric holds my eye contact as we both stare at the mirror. Damn, I’ve said too much.

“The problem with your generation is you expect life to be like what you see on social media. Then, it slaps you in the face like a giant schlong. Bang, bang, bang. Over and over, again.”

My lips press together while my face scrunches from Eric’s very descriptive analogy.

“Sure, I guess it sometimes feels like that. Not that I would know. I’m yet to experience a face beating with a giant penis.”

“Oh, honey. You have no idea what you’re missing.” Eric grins.

Thank God time is of the essence, and Eric abandons me for some dress emergency Nikki has over at her place.

I use the time wisely, fixing my eyelashes and adding the touches to get my smokey eye look right. When I’m somewhat satisfied with how it turned out, I leave my room and instantly hear my family’s voices in the living room. Most of us decided to get ready here at my parents’ penthouse and head to the club together.

“Looking hot, li’l sis,” Ava praises while beaming. “If you don’t find a man tonight, I give up on you. You know I chose the dress, right?”

“I thought it was Eric? And anyway, I don’t need a man,” I counter.

Dad is sitting in the big brown leather armchair, dressed in a black suit but with no tie. He’s typing something on his phone but manages to glance up for a brief moment.

“Alexandra, I commend you for not being influenced by your sister. Ava, not everyone needs a man.”

The corner of Ava’s lips curves upward, and without a doubt, she will taunt Dad because she’s notorious for it.

“Would you rather she needs a woman?”

Dad forces a smile, knowing all too well Ava is having fun.

“I would prefer all my daughters to choose what is right for them when it’s right for them,” he informs her. “As for you, dearest Ava, since your party days are over, stop forcing your wild ways onto Alexandra.”

“Me?” Ava’s eyes widen, pretending to be in shock. “I was pretty good. Millie is the one who almost gave you a heart attack.”

Mom walks into the room, wearing a silver dress that sits mid-thigh yet hugs her body perfectly. She’s incredibly beautiful, and even though some may say I’m biased because she’s my mom, I’m dead sure every man would agree.

“Mom, you look stunning,” I tell her.

“Thank you, sweetheart.”

She sits on the armrest of Dad’s chair as he gazes at her with a smirk. Oh God, did I just catch them eye fucking each other? Turn away right now.

Ava shakes her head while chuckling, but thankfully, Millie and Will walk in to distract us.

“Wait, where are everyone’s kids?”

“In-laws,” Ava responds, then glances at her phone. “Austin will meet us later. He wanted to catch up with an old professor who wanted to talk to him about some research into heart attacks or something of that matter.”

“I’ll make a note to catch up with Austin and find out what is happening,” Dad mentions.

“Imagine if you stayed a doctor,” Millie adds with a grin. “Would have been kinda cool.”

Dad keeps his expression fixed, but then his eyes soften. “As much as I loved it, I think I’m better in the business world.”

“Agreed.” Will laughs. “If you didn’t start Lexed, God knows where I would be.”

A small laugh escapes me. “Working alongside Rocky?”

Almost instantly, Will rolls his eyes. “Can you imagine? I’d kill him on my first day. Hopefully, Beau finds something he loves and stay’s clear of working with Dad.”

The mention of his name causes a slight pang inside my chest. I take a deep breath, knowing I’ll have to face him tonight.

Mom warns us of the time since we need to leave soon. Addy is meeting us there as they are staying in Masen’s parents’ apartment.

“Shall we go?” Dad asks us.

Ava nods with a wide smile. “Let’s party!”

“You know Mom and Dad fucked inside this club. Somewhere out the back.”

I turn my head to look at Ava, wondering why she would even think of telling me this information.

“What is wrong with you? I didn’t need to know that.”

“Neither did I,” she informs me with a cocktail in her hand. “But obviously, Eric has a big mouth, and felt I needed to know. It’s only fair I pass the trauma onto someone else.”

Addy joins us, leaning in to hug me as she drinks what looks like a Long Island Iced Tea.

“What are we talking about?”

“Dad fucking Mom against the refrigerator in the back of this club.”

Addy closes her eyes, then takes a breath. “Ava, sometimes we need to leave the past in the past.”

“Leave what in the past?” Millie asks, overhearing us despite the music getting louder.

Addy and I turn to Ava at the same time. “Don’t say it!”

“Tell me,” Millie whines. “Don’t leave me out.”

I fold my arms beneath my chest. “Fine. Go ahead, Ava.”

“According to Eric, Dad fucked Mom when she was engaged to Uncle Julian in this club. Somewhere out the back.”

Millie wrinkles her nose and then leans back. “Ew, why are you guys even discussing this?”

Just as Ava is about to open her mouth, her attention shifts to the dance floor, we all turn to see Dad and Mom dancing, though he is whispering something in her ear, and whatever it is, she seems to be enjoying it.

“Okay, I can’t do this anymore,” I inform them.

Just as I turn the other way, I spot Beau at the door. His eyes immediately meet mine, but I quickly glance at the girl beside him wearing some skimpy gold dress. My gaze falls upon her hand, resting in his.

Confused by what I’m seeing, I glance up again as he leans in and says something. I’m unable to look away until he catches me staring at them. Only now do I pay attention to him dressed in a dark suit, possibly gray, from where I’m standing since the club lights aren’t bright. His hair looks different, messier if anything.

A heavy weight lingers inside my chest, forcing me to turn away. So, he’s been busy hooking up with other women. This shouldn’t come as a surprise, given his history.

My chin begins to tremble, forcing me to bite down on my lip. The only way to get through this night is to drink, even though I swore off drinking after what happened last time.

“Can I get a shot of whatever?” I ask the bartender.

He doesn’t seem bothered by my lack of direction with liquor. Instead, he seems amused. A bottle is tipped and poured into the shot glass. Something pink looking.

“Give me what she’s having,” Will stands beside me.

“It’s pink.”

“I’m sure I can handle it.” Will smirks, then raises his brow when it’s actually in front of him. “Shots are done with a buddy or a group. To do it alone would indicate something or someone is on your mind.”

We both throw the shot back. Surprisingly, it tastes sweet and pleasant.

“Nothing, nothing at all. No one is on my mind, and apparently, I’m not on anyone’s mind either.”

Will nods in silence, then orders another round of shots.

“You know what? I might pass,” I rush. “That didn’t sit the best in my stomach.”

The odd feeling doesn’t seem to subside, and drinking more probably won’t end well. The last thing I need is a hangover and becoming besties with the toilet bowl.

“Sure,” he simply says. “You know, my brother is over there, and you are over here. You guys have been hanging out a lot. Is it bothering you he brought someone?”

I shake my head. “Beau is Beau. He likes his women. I’m not at all surprised. As for us not talking, we disagreed on something, and neither one of us wanted to apologize. That’s all.”

“Okay…”

“But don’t go blabbing that to Millie.”

“I don’t blab, Alexa.”

“I thought married couples had some sort of code where they tell each other everything?”

“Almost everything.” Will grins, then gazes at me warmly. “But not when your sister-in-law just needed a vent.”

I lean in and hug his arm. “Thank you.”

A loud roar rumbles over the speaker as Rocky grabs the microphone to give a speech. Nikki is standing beside him, looking drop-dead gorgeous in a red strapless dress that makes her boobs look phenomenal. The color of her lipstick matches her dress, red and sexy, making her look so much younger.

“Babe, there isn’t a day that goes past where I don’t thank the Lord for blessing me with a hot wife. As much as I joke about other women, frankly, my love, no one has, or will, ever come close to you. I love you, and happy fucking birthday, baby!”

Loud cheering erupts in the club. Nikki chooses not to say anything but kisses Rocky deeply, which grosses out Will beside me.

“Seriously, why are they like this,” he complains.

Judging by the way she practically mauls Rocky on the dance floor, I’d say she’s drunk as fuck.

Most of our family are here, all my aunts and uncles. Some of my cousins made it, mainly the single ones. Andy and Jessa stayed back in LA with their kids plus Will and Millie’s.

I spend most of the night catching up with everyone, though it’s difficult given the noise. Of course, my sister is drunk, which throws off Ava’s theory about Addy being pregnant.

Eric is having the time of his life with Tristan on the dance floor. It always makes me smile to see them together. Despite the smack Eric talks about other men, I know they’re madly in love. Tristan just has a lot of patience for Eric’s big personality.

I dance with my sisters and cousins but keep the drinks to just sparkling water. The stupid pink drink made me feel weird. According to Millie, it’s called a wet pussy. I should have known something with a crude name would not settle well.

And I did my best to ignore Beau sitting in one of the booths with his girlfriend or whatever the fuck she is. They weren’t making out, and of the times I did sneak a peek, he looked annoyed more than anything.

My feet begin to hurt in my new shoes, but I don’t want to be that girl walking barefoot in a club. Thankfully, a cake is brought out as we all sing happy birthday.

A small yawn escapes me, but what starts as one soon follows with ten more. Pulling my phone out of my purse, I check the time. It’s almost two A.M. How are all these oldies still partying hard?

I scan the area and find Dad at the bar. Mom is with Aunt Adriana on the dance floor and also looks like she’s had way too much to drink.

“Hey, Dad.” I touch his arm for him to turn around with a warm smile. “I’m going to head home.”

“Early for you?”

“I was up early trying to finish an assignment.”

Dad places his hand on mine. “I’m proud of you, Alexandra.”

A smile graces my lips. “Thanks, Dad. I’ll see you tomorrow before you fly out?”

“Brunch if your mother is still alive. Will you be okay to get home? I can get the driver to take you?”

I lean in to hug him with a laugh. “It’s only a few blocks and plenty of cabs out. Good luck getting her home tonight.”

As I look around to say goodbye, I realize everyone has had too much to drink, therefore, will make a scene about me leaving. The last thing I need is drunk person guilt, especially since I’m tired and just want to go to bed.

Without lingering anymore, I make my way to the exit, welcoming the cool night air, only to be stopped at the door. I quickly look at the hand wrapped around my arm, recognizing the tattoo instantly.

“It’s not what you think,” he blurts out.

I shift my body so our eyes meet. Beau doesn’t look drunk, his eyes crystal clear. Yet all I can focus on is the smell of his cologne. Stop… this won’t help you in any way.

My arms fold on their own accord as his hand falls to his side, pushing my chest up. Beau’s gaze wanders to my tits, but he quickly turns away, looking pained.

“What is it you think I think?”

“That I’ve been fucking around the last two weeks.”

“Well, you walk into the club holding some girl’s hand. What did you want me to think?”

“She was just nervous meeting my family.”

My stomach hardens at his admission. The term ‘meeting the family’ is usually a big deal. It means you’re serious about the said person.

“It’s been two weeks,” I almost shout. “How serious can it be? I mean, where did you find her? At some bimbo shop in the clearance aisle that says no returns?”

“Wow.” Beau laughs, then presses his lips into a hard smile. “Say how you really feel, Alexa.”

“You walked away from me, left me in the middle of the night, and haven’t spoken to me since. I’m hurt, Beau. There, I said it,” I confess in an irate tone. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m tired and want to go home.”

I walk away, refusing to look back.

How dare he treat me the way he has, then try to twist things like it’s my fault.

Beau Romano is no different from Hunter Cash. Both of them are only looking out for their own needs.

Selfish men with selfish intentions.

I’m done with both of them.

Just like Dad said earlier tonight, not everyone needs a man.

Not even a best friend.