Chapter 14

FOURTEEN

ALEXA

It turns out women weren’t lying when they said the last trimester was the hardest. I’d read a number of blog posts and pregnancy forums. So many mentioned just how difficult the home stretch is.

I find myself wanting to organize and clean things, which is so not like me. My room is my first target, organized down to my sock drawer being arranged into categories.

Oddly so, it is very satisfying.

There isn’t much needed in the nursery since my sisters set everything up. The crib is ready, all the clothes are washed, and even the change table has everything ready to go. They tried to keep everything neutral since I chose not to find out the sex of the baby.

When all of it is done, it makes sense to tackle the rest of the house out of sheer boredom. I’m not sure if Mom is grateful, given her organization is next level.

“You’re in the nesting phase.” Mom laughs while making me some breakfast. “When I was pregnant with all your girls, your father had one rule. I was not allowed to touch his office.”

“And did you listen?”

“Of course not,” Mom answers with a grin. “If your father says not to do something, I automatically want to do it.”

A chuckle leaves me mid-bite of my toast. “That’s how I felt in high school. Look at me now. Back home and relying on both of you for everything.”

“Honey, you are not a burden. We love having you home again. It’s felt empty for a while.”

Dad walks into the kitchen, dressed for work in a sharp navy suit. He doesn’t at all look his age, which is probably why women still drool over him, according to Ava. The same can be said for Mom. Both of them look so young for their age. I can only hope their genes carry onto me and I look that good when I’m their age.

“What has been feeling empty?” he questions, making himself a coffee on the fancy machine. God, the smell is amazing, and I miss it so much.

“I was saying the house has felt empty with all the girls gone, so it’s nice to have Alexa here.”

Across the kitchen, Dad leans against the counter with his mug now in hand. “Yes, we do love having you here.”

“Even though I’m pregnant with no husband?”

Dad keeps his expression fixed. “We count our blessings, Alexandra. We pray for your health and safe delivery of our grandchild.”

My sisters are still shocked to this day how Dad is somewhat relaxed with my pregnancy. I guess so am I, given his history of outbursts when it came to us girls disobeying his wishes. He’s always been one to control our family, but as I draw close to the impending birth of my child, I realize he has done it all to protect his family.

And how can I fault him for that?

He loves us and will do anything for my sisters and me.

“Since I’m thirty-five weeks now and won’t be able to get around much anymore, I wanted to take a drive out today to visit a friend who moved a few hours away,” I tell them while checking my phone. “Indiana owns a bookstore, so I’m eager to see what she has in store.”

“It sounds like a great idea,” Mom agrees but then purses her lips momentarily. “Make sure you call us and give us the address in case anything happens. Oh, and pick me up something spicy.

“Like how spicy?”

Dad crosses his arms, gazing at Mom with a smirk. I wait for him to say something, but he keeps his opinion to himself.

“Spicy, no billionaires,” Mom replies.

“What’s wrong with billionaires?” Dad questions, almost annoyed.

Mom shrugs. “Reading is an escape. In case you’ve forgotten, baby, you’re a billionaire.”

Unable to hold back, I let out a soft laugh. “Ouch, Dad. So, what else, Mom?”

“Try to find me something like monsters or even Aliens. It’s been a while since I’ve binge-read Aliens.”

“Aliens?” Dad repeats, narrowing his brows. “Really, Charlotte?”

“Blame Ava. She started all this.”

“True story, Dad. Ava is the one who gives us all the book recs.”

Dad glances at his watch, then finishes his coffee. “I won’t be back home until late. We have our stakeholders arriving today from Hong Kong, so I expect to be in lockdown with them all day long.”

“Is that why you look extra smashing today, Dad?” I tease as Mom laughs. “Trying to impress a group of men?”

He chuckles, then shakes his head with a final smirk. “If old men are what I desired, sure. Lucky, I’m married to the hottest wife a man could have.”

“Ew.” I cringe, leaning back in my chair. “Did you just call Mom hot? ‘Cause, maybe I should leave the room. Actually, leave the house.”

“Thanks, appreciated.” Dad grins.

I’m unsure whether he is joking, so I quickly grab my toast and bail like I’m a fugitive on the run. Inside my room, I pack a small backpack with a few things, grab my keys, and head out to the car.

The drive through the canyons is relaxing, especially with my windows completely open and my music blaring. The small town my friend, Indiana, lives in is cute and quaint, giving me the best vibes. It’s so good to be away from the city hustle and breathe in the fresh air.

We meet for lunch at a quirky cafe decorated with cat memorabilia. At first, I thought it was odd, but then I met Petunia, the owner, and everything made sense. If you ignore how weird it all is, the food is delicious.

“I can’t believe you are here and pregnant. Lex Edwards’ daughter.” Indiana shakes her head in disbelief. “I also can’t believe I’m here running a bookstore while taking care of my grandmother. Our cheerleading days are long gone.”

I sigh, then touch her hand. “Bookstores are awesome. And besides, this place is beautiful. Your grandmother is lucky to have you. Cheerleading was fun, but seriously, I have no idea how we did the splits as we did.”

“I think that all the time.” Indiana cringes. “It’s so different from the life we envisioned in middle school when we swore we would be doctors.”

My lips curve upward. “There’s still a chance, I guess. We will just be more seasoned.”

Indiana laughs. “Oh, nice way of saying old.”

“Tell me, any hot guys worthy of a small-town romance?”

She takes a bite of her sandwich with a smile. “I’m kinda seeing someone. He’s a single father, though.”

“Oh,” I mouth, gazing at her curiously. “Where’s the mother?”

“She ran off with another man.”

“That’s so sad for him and the child. How old is the kid?”

“Henri is four and a really sweet girl.”

“And it doesn’t bother you? Being with someone with a daughter?”

Indiana purses her lips. “Look, it’s different. I can’t lie about that. Leo came to this town to give his daughter a quiet life and the affordability to raise her. He has an uncle and aunt the town over, so they help out when they can. I’m not used to dating someone whose number one priority is someone else. But, we are having fun, and as I said, Henri is a sweet girl.”

It dawns on me how blessed I was to be raised by two loving parents and surrounded by family. My whole life, I took it all for granted, and now I’m faced with being a single mom. I appreciate all the things I have been lucky to have in my life. I only wish I didn’t cause such heartache for my parents in high school and the year I left home to travel. If my kid ends up like me, it’s karma coming to bite me in the ass.

“What about you?” Indiana asks. “Do you have a custody agreement with the dad?”

I shake my head. “He doesn’t know.”

My phone buzzes inside my purse. I quickly pull it out in case it’s important. Ava’s number flashes on the screen, but I ignore it.

“Just my sister,” I say out loud.

The phone rings again, then again, until Ava sends me a text.

Ava

Fine, don’t pick up my call but read this.

There is a link she’s attached, so I clicked on it. It goes straight to an Instagram account belonging to Hunter Cash. Since when does he have a social account? I read the post slowly, but as each word passes, the pit of my stomach weighs down with a heavy feeling.

“It is with great sadness my wife and I deliver the news of our pregnancy loss. While we have chosen to grieve for the last few months in private, we ask for your respect to allow us to continue to grieve.”

“Alexa?” Indiana calls with a worried tone. “Are you okay? You look pale?”

“I, uh…” I stammer, unable to vocalize my thoughts. “Just a change in plans.”

I force a smile, not wanting to discuss it though I can’t stop thinking about it. Indiana shows me around town and her bookstore for the next two hours. The place is impressive, with limited edition books showcased on the wooden shelves. There’s a brown sofa in the corner and lots of greenery. The aesthetic is so pleasing, and I end up buying a ton of books for my shelf, plus some popular alien romances for Mom.

Leo and his daughter Henri visit. He walks in, carrying Henri on his shoulders as she squeals. I can’t help but smile watching the two of them, only for a pang to reach my heart, as I know my child will never experience this.

Indiana introduces them, and I don’t blame her for wanting to date him. He is incredibly fine. The whole daddy vibes make him all the more attractive.

I glance at the time and force myself to say goodbye to give myself enough time to drive home before it gets dark. As we hug it out, Indiana promises to come to visit as soon as the baby is here, and I’m settled into my new role as mommy.

Inside the car, there’s too much time to think. What does it mean for my baby with Hunter and Kathy no longer expecting a child? Do I tell him? Give him the opportunity to be in our kid’s life, or do I just leave it? The easiest option is to keep it a secret, but the guilt consumes me. Of late, I can’t stop thinking about it, but I’m too scared to face him.

My Bluetooth rings, and I see Beau’s name flashing on the screen. I pick up the call even though my mood is less than friendly.

“Are you ready for my visit?” he begins in a cheery voice. I can hear the bustle of the streets in the background, assuming he is on the way to somewhere in Manhattan. “I feel like a traitor for leaving and hanging out on the west coast.”

“Sure,” I mumble.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Don’t pull the whole nothing bullshit with me. I don’t have time to waste going around in circles when eventually you’ll blurt it out anyway.”

“It’s really nothing.”

“Alexa,” Beau warns. “I’m serious.”

“Hunter and Kathy lost their baby.”

“And?”

“What do you mean? That’s horrible.”

A heavy breath sounds over the speaker. “And why are you acting all moody because of their situation? It’s terrible, but it doesn’t change anything with you. You’re still having this baby without him.”

“Yes,” I croak. “I mean, I was just thinking, maybe without another baby in his life taking his attention, he does have the right to know.”

Beau remains silent. The only sound over the speaker is cars honking obnoxiously.

“I need to go,” he snaps.

“Beau Romano,” I threaten him. “Don’t you dare hang up on me. I need a friend right now.”

“What would you like me to say, Alexa? Sure, tell him. I’ll watch on the side with my bucket of popcorn while he convinces you to move in together to stay as a family. Then, I’ll wait for the moment when you tell me you’ve always loved him, and this feels right.”

My mouth falls open as my chest begins to hitch. The walls of my constricted lungs make it hard to breathe. Then my hands tremble against the steering wheel. How dare he think my motive is to get Hunter back in bed like that’s all I can think about.

“You know what, Beau? You’re a fucking jerk!”

I slam my finger against the end call button to let out a giant sob. My eyes water, glazed and making it hard to focus. Then, something catches my eye in the distance, something slow walking across the road.

Quickly wiping my eyes to clear my vision, I lean forward to see a baby bear walking on its own across the empty road. It’s too late to slam my foot on the brake, so I swerve at the last minute to avoid killing the poor little guy, only for my tire to fall off the road and spin the car out of control.

The adrenaline spurts to every part of me as I try to control the steering.

But then, a tree is the only thing my eyes focus on with fear.

Closer and closer, then a loud bang causes me to scream, followed by the nightmare called darkness.