Chapter 35

Chapter Thirty-Five

Landon

Listen to A Symptom of Being Human

by Shinedown

I tried desperately to focus on my castmates even as my attention kept going back to my phone. I’d had spotty service all day, which seemed to be part of the course in this remote hell. My entire body throbbed after the endless shooting. I’d been up since six am to gather eggs and be chased by the demon chickens who probably wanted to eat me since he looked so skinny. Then I had to muck stalls and give the horses a bath with Brody. Covered in sweat and bugs, I’d gotten wet from the hoses and ended up with a too-clingy shirt and molded shorts. No one let me change and I spent the next few hours uncomfortable and ignoring stares from all the guys on set.

Ugh.

Things kept getting worse. After the debacle with Clayton, the producer told me it was great for prelaunch, and that Lydia believed I’d be the break-out star from all of them. They were already angling for me to be the last one with Brody and Clayton so we all fought it out together.

Guess reality wasn’t as real as I’d believed.

Ronnie and Abby were talking in loud voices, and the guys were getting trashed at the run-down, half-assed bar down the road. All I wanted was to go home to bed, but didn’t want to add any extra incentive for the girls to hate me, so I agreed to go out for a drink.

Big mistake.

I looked down at her phone again.

“Still waiting to hear from Adam?” Brenna asked with a bit of sympathy. She ended up being the only one to really give me a chance, even though she took crap from the others.

I sighed. “Yeah, he leaves for LA soon and I’ve been having trouble with my connection.”

Brenna wrinkled her nose. “Me, too, it sucks out here. Hey, I’m afraid I’m going to be the next voted out.” Her voice held worry. “It’s all about stupid alliances here. Any way you can make nice with a few more people so they don’t gang up on me?”

I tried to act like I cared, which was sad because I’d taken this job for a reason. Every day I spent here I questioned my decision. “I’ll talk to whoever will listen. We should get Corinne out since she’s always about the drama.”

Brenna snorted. “No one’s letting her go yet. Especially Brody and Ronnie.”

“Then I’ll say Amy’s name. She’s an easy loss.”

“Thanks.”

I got through another half hour and then I stood up. “Gonna head back.”

“One more drink!” a few shouted out. “Last round.”

I shook my head. The music was high, the guys were stumbling, and usually I’d be in the middle of the party but not tonight. There was an instinct to keep my wits with these people. I trusted no one.

Not like my friends.

Pain hit my gut. The idea of not seeing them all hurt. But how could we piece together what had been so broken? I still had hope after some time we may come back together, even stronger. Being around these strangers only made me realize what I’d lost.

I snuck out of the crappy pub and began to walk back to the farm. My stupid shoes forced me to go slow so I wouldn’t twist an ankle over the broken pavements. The light in the distance guided me as crickets chirped and mosquitos swarmed and gnats nibbled at my bare legs. No amount of bug spray made a difference here. I swore I’d never leave the city and solid concrete again.

“Wait up.” I cursed under my breath as Brody fell in step with me. “You shouldn’t walk alone out here.”

I rolled my eyes. “I don’t need you as an escort. You should’ve finished your drink.”

“I’m pretty trashed. Gonna be hurting tomorrow.” He offered me a smile and I gave it back, though my walls were up. I knew Brody was playing a game but hoped he wasn’t as big of a dick as I imagined. “Phone still not working?”

I shook my head. “It’s so annoying to feel cut off out here.”

“Yeah, it’s not Hollywood.” We walked in silence for a bit. “How do you feel you’re doing?”

“On set? Okay.”

“I mean, with all of the girls. Me and Clayton. I noticed you get really tense around me.”

I lifted a brow. “I have good reason.”

“I only want it to be a good show.” Frustration radiated from his aura. “This is important to me. If we do it right, we can all walk away with a bigger following and opportunities. A love triangle will keep people watching. But you have to play your role.”

I was so sick and tired of the role thing being thrown in my face, but I understood why. My biggest question is why had I changed so much since Adam? I’d truly believed this is what I always wanted, but now I know it’s not. At least, not like this. “I hate all of this fake shit,” I muttered. “No one else was told to be kissing two guys or act like an idiot in front of the camera. Do you know how embarrassing it was when Corinne dumped that bucket of hay over me? And she got praised for it!”

“Because it was funny and she’s giving Lydia what she asked for. A girl’s feud. A love triangle. God, it’s easy enough if you shut up and give in. You’re supposed to get to the winner’s circle, but not like this.”

I winced but accepted the truth. Brody was right. It was my choice and I needed to be real with myself.

We were approaching the house when he suddenly turned. “Maybe we should practice. Like you did with Clayton.”

I frowned and tried to push him away, but he backed me up so my back slammed against a tree trunk. What the hell was going on? I was getting sick of these guys pushing me around, trying to take what they wanted when it was solely mine to give. “Get off me,” I growled, trying to duck under his arm.

He shook his head and looked disgusted. “Get over yourself. I’m not gonna force you, Landon. But you’re a wreck, so why don’t you just kiss me and get it over with. There’s no camera. I’m gonna come at you hard during shooting, and if you’re like a scared animal, no one’s buying shit.”

I dragged in a breath and calmed down. He had a point, and even though he was drunk, he wasn’t his usual aggressive self.

But no way in hell was I kissing him in the dark, in the woods, without the safety of a camera crew.

“Thanks for the offer, but I’m good. I hear what you’re saying. Okay?”

He squinted at me, looking a bit sulky, but finally nodded. “Yeah. Okay.” A grin tugged at his lips and he leaned in. “Sure you don’t want to do this privately on our own?”

I pushed at his chest. “Nice try but?—”

“Get the fuck off her.”

Both of us jumped as a furious male voice rang out. I stared at the figure standing close, hidden by shadows. My heart began to pound for a few seconds, hoping Adam had somehow taken the drive upstate before he left to say goodbye to me.

But when the darkness cleared, it was Max that leapt toward us, grabbed Brody, and threw him to the ground.