CHAPTER 15

“It’s sticking,” Drew said as she unclipped from her board. “That first turn was rough. I had to practically twist myself out of it. The rest weren’t bad. How much time did I lose up top, though?”

“Not much,” her coach replied. “But let’s take a look at the waxing and see what we can fix.”

“It’s a slow track, yeah?” she asked. “I felt like I was molasses up there. I’m used to going a lot faster. Was it me, the board, or–”

“It’s the course. I think they’re going to have to make some changes to it before the competition. I’ve watched others go down it around your practice times, too. Let’s get the board taken care of now and talk about how to take it if it stays slow. On the third jump, you weren’t in the air long enough and landed too early.”

“I know. And it’s slow – I couldn’t get up to speed anywhere. It’s like they didn’t pack the snow at all and just said, ‘Fuck it. It’s just training today.’”

“I don’t think they said that, but I’ll talk to someone to find out what’s going on,” he replied.

Drew took a drink from her water bottle and said, “I almost don’t want to go again until they fix it. I don’t want to get used to going slow.”

“Then, let’s focus on something else I noticed,” her coach suggested.

Drew nodded, and they both moved out of the way of the other boarders who would be training on this course today. It wasn’t her usual one. She’d been too optimistic about making the team – or, rather, hadn’t been optimistic at all – so her coach had suggested a change of scenery to help her with that. There weren’t that many boardercross courses in the world, though, and obviously, most of them were only available to train on during certain times of the year. Drew had been lucky enough to have been born to two skiers who loved the mountains, and when snowboarding picked up in popularity, a half-pipe, a slopestyle course, and a boardercross course were constructed nearby, so she had the chance to grow up in her sport and not have to go far.

Team USA didn’t use her course to train, though. They were using Woodward Copper, Colorado, as their training facility for these games, and that was where Drew’s coach suggested she do some training today to make sure her face was very much on the selection committee’s mind when they made their choice. Drew wasn’t sure whether that was a good idea or a bad one, or if it would even do anything for her cause, but she’d already seen several people from the team’s administration out on the course and meandering about inside the buildings where the athletes trained, changed, and worked out. Today was the day Drew would find out whether or not she’d gotten a call-up to train with the team, and she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t nervous.

If she didn’t make it, she’d clearly be embarrassed for coming all this way, but if she did, she could stick around for the first US event, which would be more of an exhibition event, primarily for the newly selected team to continue to compete for a spot on the final Olympic roster. It was the first chance they’d have to show everyone post-selection that they had what it took to compete at the most well-known sporting event in the world for their country. Since they always selected more boarders than they needed – to allow for injuries, people removing themselves, and a myriad of other reasons – there was still a chance that even if Drew got selected, she wouldn’t make the team or would end up as an alternate. She wasn’t sure what would be worse: sitting on the sidelines waiting and maybe hoping – even though that was bad – that someone got hurt or would otherwise pull out so she could have another chance, or sitting at home and not having that chance at all because she wasn’t even an alternate.

After training, Drew changed and walked out of the locker room, finding Chris Marcum, the director of the ski and snowboarding teams, standing there, looking down at his phone. She thought about walking right by him, but that would be rude. On the other hand, if she said hello and she hadn’t been selected for the team, she would be able to see it on his face, and that would end her hope.

“Hey, Drew,” he greeted when she looked up. “I was hoping to grab you for a minute since you’re here anyway. Is that okay?”

“Uh… Yeah. Sure,” she replied and swallowed because he’d been waiting for her.

She couldn’t read his face how she’d hoped she would be able to, though, so she was left with following him down the hall and into his office, having no idea if she was about to have her heart broken or be given some really amazing news.

“You decided to get some training in here,” he noted. “Your coach called and asked if it was okay, and I thought it was a great idea.”

Drew placed her bag on the floor and sat down in the chair opposite his desk.

“Yes, I wanted a change of scenery. And I’ve always loved these facilities. Thank you for letting me get some runs in.”

“It’s slow, though, right?” he asked. “I’ve got them taking a look at it, but I saw your times from today and yesterday, and they were slow. I checked others, and it’s all of you. They made a change to how they build the thing a few weeks ago, and so far, I’m not a fan.”

“I was just telling my coach that.”

“We’ll get it fixed before the event. Don’t worry.” The director smiled at her before he looked at his computer monitor and clicked his mouse a few times. “Listen…”

Drew’s face fell then. She’d tried to keep herself together, but this was it. She’d be going home after this because the thought of training here with the athletes who had been selected pulled at her heart in the worst way. She’d go back to her hotel room, pack up as quickly as possible, and get the first flight out of town. She’d also have to decide if she was done for good or if she wanted to compete in non-team events until she’d retire either at the end of this season or another. The decisions she’d been putting off were about to be put right in her face. She would no longer have the excuses for not settling down, like her parents – and if Drew was being honest with herself, like she – wanted to. She would need to find a job that didn’t involve being on a board, and she had never had a job that didn’t involve being on a board. Her life was about to change, but as much as she’d known this was coming, she still wasn’t prepared for it.

“We’ve got some great boarders this cycle. And it’s a small team…”

“I get it,” she said softly.

“You’re the best female boarder in history,” he said.

“But not in the Olympics. Not for Team USA,” she added.

“Drew, I need to know one thing from you.”

“What?”

“Are you back?” he asked.

“Sorry?”

“Are you back? Are you focused? Healthy? You’ve had a rough couple of years, yes, but the old Drew is still in there. I saw it on the course today and yesterday. It’s slow, yes, but you had the fastest time among everyone on it. You look great, according to the coaches and trainers who were also there. We all know what happened at the last Games. It wasn’t your fault. You probably would’ve won that heat and the next, and then moved on to the semis, at least, if not even the finals. You could’ve had a medal around your neck right now. That’s how it goes. We all know that. But that loss wasn’t your fault. Everyone here knows that, too.”

“I’m back,” she replied. “I’m focused. I’m healthy. My knee is fine, and I’ve got no other injuries. I also just took a vacation to make sure I was well-rested. I’m training well, and–”

“And you know if you’re put on the team now, that’s no guarantee. I know you know that, but I want to be clear and upfront here. If it turns out that you’re not really back, or if there’s an injury you can’t shake, you wouldn’t be going with us.”

“I know,” she confirmed, sitting up in her chair now, feeling a little of the hope come back to her.

“You’re the best boarder I’ve ever seen, Drew,” he continued. “I don’t mean female, either. Your instincts, your speed, how you navigate every course like it’s a beginner-level, even though it’s made for the best in the world – I’ve never seen anything like it. You should’ve been in all the Games for Team USA since you started boarding, in my opinion, but I was still boarding myself when you first started out. Either way, I need that experience and leadership on this team. If you’re back, you’re with us.”

“Wait. Really?”

“Yes. Welcome back to the team,” he said and reached his hand over the desk to shake hers.

Drew stood up to take it, shook it, and let go, still a little in disbelief.

“I’ll get this course fixed, but after that, I need you to kick some serious ass on it. To be honest, I’m going out on a bit of a limb here because there were some people who didn’t see you making it back. Prove them wrong for me.”

“I will,” she replied.

Hearing that some people didn’t believe in her should have hurt, but instead, it motivated her. It made Drew just angry enough to get out there and kick some serious ass, like Chris had asked her to.

“Competition starts in three days,” he concluded.

“I’m ready,” she stated.

◆◆◆

Drew had texted Selma that night that she’d been put on the team – at least, for now. Selma had replied with a standard, ‘Congratulations,’ message and not much more than that, but Drew understood. They were both back in season now, with Selma having her own competition in Canada and Drew having one here to prove herself to the people who would eventually choose which boarders would go to the Olympics. She missed talking to Selma, though. The handful of texts they had exchanged the past few days had been nice, but she missed being able to call the woman and talk to her for an hour or two at a time, which they hadn’t done every night, but they’d gotten into a habit of doing at least once a week or, even, a couple of times a week. Drew needed to be focused on boarding right now anyway, so it was probably a good thing that she started to get some time back to herself every night.

It was the first day of the event, and Drew was the oldest boarder there, male or female, which she decided to wear as a badge of honor instead of thinking about it as a possible weakness. There were six prelim heats of six racers, meaning thirty-six boarders had been chosen to show up for a chance to show their skills. Only some of them had gotten the call out of their initial selection; the rest were hopefuls. Drew wondered if she would’ve stayed after all had she not been picked. She hoped that she would have toughed out the rejection, made her presence felt on a board, and ended up with a better result. As she took her spot at the starting gate, she ran through her routine, feeling right at home. She looked over and saw five other women. Two of them looked nervous, boards gliding back and forth as if they couldn’t find just the right position for them. The other three seemed calmer, but Drew felt only calm.

She took off at the start and hit the berm at just the right angle, catapulting herself down into the first hill, where she gathered speed, hit the small jump, and grabbed her board in mid-air, turning it just slightly to hit the snow where she wanted. The course was a lot faster now, which helped, but Drew was also feeling it today. She took the first turn in the lead and didn’t look behind her to see who was still there. She could feel at least two boarders right on her back, though, so she hugged the line of the next turn as much as she could and centered herself for the next jump. With more speed this time, she got more air and landed even later, in a good way, than she had in her last warm-up.

She took the next turn perfectly and heard something behind her that sounded like a couple of racers either falling or crashing. She knew there was still one boarder tight on her tail, and only the top three would advance, so she wanted to put some space between them. Out of the third jump, she lowered herself as much as she could, landed well, and picked up even more speed. That gave her a little more of the desired space. When she got to the final big jump, though, she knew she was in the lead by a wide enough margin that as long as she didn’t fall, she’d win, so she took the jump safely, not going for speed so much as a decent finish.

Drew had never been reckless, and this was only a prelim race, so she’d save her best stuff for the next one. She crossed the finish line first, followed by four other boarders who came in around the same time. The sixth one came in a few seconds later and must have fallen at some point.

When Drew pulled off her goggles and checked her time on the screen, it was her best in a very long time, and that was with her coasting at the end. She smiled and knew that she’d been right: she was back.