Chapter Eighteen

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

C HARLOTTE LAUGHED WHEN she read the latest text from Cal.

Just moved three mares into a pasture so they can have sex with Ice Man. I feel a little like a matchmaker.

She was glad he was joking about the ranching chore. Heck, she was just glad to hear from him. Since Harper's breakthrough at the pond, Cal hadn't been around as much as she wanted. Then again, anything less than 24/7 wasn't enough, but there was no way for that to happen. Not only because he'd had ranch work to do but also because he was obviously still in need of time and space to think.

Charlotte missed him. Not just the sex. Though, she definitely missed that since their one actual time together had been amazing. But she missed Cal, too, and had to accept this absence might be his way of distancing himself from her so he could try to protect her heart. Of course, her heart was whining about that. Her body, too.

Six days.

That's when Cal's leave ran out, and there were times, like now, when Charlotte could hear those minutes ticking away. Cal was likely feeling the same time pressure since this was a huge decision. She only hoped it was the need for reflection that was keeping him away.

The visit with Paul had to also be bothering him, so that might be playing into this lack of connection she was feeling with him. Cal had told her about the conversation he'd had with the man, about Paul's idiotic notions when it came to Harper. But Charlotte figured Cal had left some things out, that he hadn't spilled all of what had been said. Whatever had gone on, though, Cal had asked that she call him immediately if Paul showed up to see Harper. So far, he hadn't.

And Charlotte hoped that continued.

Even if Harper wanted to see her father—and Charlotte wasn't at all sure she did—the man was just plain toxic. This time away from him might give Harper the chance to heal. She had certainly gotten a good start on that by beginning the therapy sessions and even doing some mild exercises on the equipment in the barn.

She answered Cal with the emoji of Shady-Looking Guy with Googly Eyes for his matchmaker comment and was debating if she should do a follow-up text to mention anything about his current ranching duties when she got a reply.

Horse sex already in progress. Minimal foreplay. And quick. One minute. Should I come over later and see if we can last longer?

Instant fire. Instant need. And she was laughing, and burning, when she answered him with a Yes. I can time you .

He didn't send a reply. Instead her phone rang with a call from him. "When's a good time?" he asked.

Charlotte would have said now if she hadn't heard a shriek, and she was pretty sure her mother had made the sound.

"Did Mandy find another doll?" Cal asked. He'd obviously heard the screech as well.

"Possibly, but if so, she must have shown it to my mother. Izzie's here." And she was apparently coming up the stairs since Charlotte could hear her muttering and her footsteps.

"Then I'll let you go. Text me and let me know when it's a good time for me to come over."

"Hopefully, the text will be in five minutes or less," she murmured, and she ended the call just as Izzie appeared in her doorway.

Her mother was out of breath and looking a little frazzled. Charlotte actually saw a couple of strands of hair out of place, and alarm shot through her when she realized there was something wrong with Izzie's eyes.

"What happened?" Charlotte asked, motioning to her own eyes.

"Oh, that. I put makeup on one and then forgot to do the other. I didn't notice until I got to work and then realized I didn't have my travel cosmetics bag in my purse."

All of that was completely out of the norm for her mother. "Is everything okay?"

"No, it is not," Izzie was quick to say. "When I got here, Mandy was coming out as I was going in, and she was holding out two of those dolls that the workers found. She was holding them away from her body, and I ran right into them."

That would have indeed been an unpleasant experience. "I thought you liked the dolls and wanted to display them."

Her mother huffed. "No, I don't like the dolls, but I was trying to placate some members of the garden guild and town council by agreeing that we should have more local arts-and-craft stuff on display."

Charlotte had no trouble hearing the frustration in her mother's voice, but part of her felt guilty for wanting to hurry Izzie along so she could fire off that invitation to Cal.

"Uh, did something else happen?" Charlotte asked. "I mean, you seem upset."

"I am upset," Izzie snapped, and then she groaned, muttered an apology and groaned some more. "I saw the latest poll results this morning, and I'm almost certainly going to lose reelection."

Another first. Charlotte had heard her mother mention dips and rises in polls, but she'd never seemed this down about it.

"It's my breakup with Taggert," Izzie went on. "People really like him, so being with him gave me a boost." Her sigh told Charlotte that the elevation in status hadn't been just in the job but her personal life, too. "But now that everyone's heard that it's off between us for good, voters are turning away from me."

Now it was Charlotte who sighed. She figured she knew where this was going, and the destination was the same as it usually was. "And it's my fault," she said before Izzie could.

Izzie stopped pacing and looked her straight in the eyes. "No, it's not."

Her mother said it with such conviction that it stunned Charlotte. This was another first.

"The breakup with Taggert is my fault," Izzie went on. Instead of pacing, she dropped onto the foot of Charlotte's bed. "I'm to blame for the drop in the polls, for people seeing the truth about me. Taggert saw it. He saw that I'm a mean, manipulative person."

"That's a bit harsh," Charlotte told her. "You wanted a fairy-tale wedding—"

"I wanted a husband that people respected," Izzie interrupted. "One who wouldn't run out on me for another woman."

"One that you loved?" Charlotte asked because she truly hoped that had been part of Izzie's relationship with Taggert.

"Yes, love," she muttered on another of those heavy sighs. "But he saw right through me."

Charlotte decided to try to cut off any more personal bashing. "No more mean and manipulative stuff. You have good qualities, or Taggert would have never gotten involved with you in the first place."

A burst of air left her mouth, a sort of laugh but definitely not a happy one. "He wanted fairy-tale, too, because he was so lonely, and for a while he was able to overlook my faults. Oh, God," she moaned, "I have so many faults."

Huffing, Charlotte went to her, caught her by the shoulders and was about to give her a lecture about whining and self-loathing. Izzie stopped her in her tracks.

"The note wasn't meant for you," Izzie blurted out.

Charlotte was confused for a couple of seconds, and then the meaning of that slowly started to sink in.

"You mean the note Dad left?" Charlotte asked.

Izzie nodded and kept their gazes locked. "He didn't leave it for you but for me."

Charlotte shook her head. "But it had my name on it," she pointed out.

"Because I wrote it on the outside of the paper." Izzie stopped, and tears began to slip down her cheeks. "I was going to say, Charlotte, here's the note your dad left for me . But then you came in, all upset and begging me to do something to stop him from leaving. You even said you wanted to go with him."

She had. A lot of that night was an emotional blur, but she recalled that well enough.

"And when I heard you say that, I snapped," Izzie went on. "I was so angry, not just at him but at you. Because you both wanted to leave me. So I gave you that note."

Charlotte eased her grip from her mother's shoulders and stepped back. "You did what?" was all she managed to ask.

Izzie stood, too. "I didn't want to lose you," she responded.

Charlotte's mind did a whirlwind recap of those moments. Of when her mother had indeed given her the note. The note she'd thought was for her.

I can't do this anymore. You've made it impossible for me to stay .

There it was. Those words that had tormented her for nearly twenty years. Words that drowned her in guilt. Had made her feel like crap and unworthy of being loved. Had made her think that she owed her mother so very much because she'd driven him away.

But now those words took on a totally different meaning.

Charlotte attempted to say something. Anything. She even tried one of those shrieks usually reserved for creepy dolls. She couldn't even manage that. Thankfully, she could move, so she headed for the door and just kept on walking.

Izzie called out to her, but Charlotte ignored it and hurried down all the stairs. She didn't stop in the foyer. She went straight to her car and started driving. No uncertainty in where she was going.

She needed to see Cal.

He couldn't fix this. No one could. But she needed him to hold her and make her believe she wouldn't fall apart.

It wasn't a long drive to Saddlebrook, and she was equally thankful when she didn't spot Izzie trying to follow her. She still might, but Charlotte couldn't handle seeing her right now.

When she got to the ranch, it occurred to her that Cal might still be in one of the pastures with the horses, but then she saw him making his way from the barn toward the house. He saw her, too, and headed her way. Slowly at first. But after she stepped out of her car, he must have noticed her expression because he quickened his pace. She hurried to him, and once they met, she went straight into his arms. Charlotte held on, using him as the anchor that she very much needed.

"What happened?" he asked. "Is it Paul?"

She shook her head and eased back enough so they'd have eye contact. "It's my mother."

Apparently, his mind didn't go straight to an accident, probably because he knew Izzie. "What did she do now?"

"She lied," Charlotte managed to say. "A very big lie."

Cal muttered some profanity, but he didn't ask for more details. However, with his arm still around her, he got her into the house. No one was around when they stepped into the foyer, and they had the stairs to themselves as they made their way to the second floor.

And to his bedroom.

The moment he'd shut the door, he pulled her back to him, wrapping her in that hug she still craved. "All right," he muttered, brushing a kiss on her forehead. "Tell me what happened."

She did. While he held her, Charlotte poured out her heart to Cal.

C AL MENTALLY CURSED , calling Izzie every bad word he could recall that had been doled out to someone who'd done something lower than low.

And this was low.

He couldn't imagine anyone letting their teenage kid take the blame like that, but after Charlotte had told him what'd happened, he realized he wasn't that surprised. He'd always known Izzie could be selfish and a control freak. Not as bad as Paul but still there. Still just as damaging.

Thankfully, Charlotte was no longer crying. He'd hated seeing those tears in her eyes, which had in turn only caused him to curse Izzie even more. But the tears had stopped, and now Charlotte was quiet and snuggled against him. Perhaps she was also silently doling out some curses at her mom. He hoped so anyway, because he figured anger was going to be a necessary step in getting over this particular hurdle.

Shortly after Charlotte had spilled all about what Izzie had done, those tears had started, and not long after that, Cal had moved her to sit on the foot of his bed. That'd lasted until back cramps had started to set in for both of them, and they'd moved to the top of the bed for some much needed support from the headboard.

"Some people drown their sorrows with eighty proof," Charlotte muttered. "The sugar solution tastes better."

Cal smiled, and he felt some of the tightness in his chest go away. They had indeed gone the sugar route. Charlotte had declined the shot of whiskey he'd offered her, but they were both sucking on some Jolly Rancher candy he kept on his desk in the corner. At the moment, the air was loaded with the scents of cherry—her choice—and green apple—for him.

Because Charlotte seemed to be shifting away from the pain and shock of what Izzie had done, he held back any questions, but one was front and center for him. Why had Izzie fessed up now? Had the breakup with Taggert sent Izzie spiraling over an emotional edge that had in turn made her confess? Possibly. The breakup must have rattled her. But then something else occurred to Cal. Something he'd heard his grandmother and Maybell talking about.

"Your mom's popularity is down in the polls," he muttered before he could stop himself. "She probably won't get reelected."

Charlotte lifted her head from his shoulder and nodded. "I think she was crying more about that than Taggert."

That made sense. Well, as much sense as something like this could make.

"Since my dad left, I think my mother has been on this quest to prove she's perfect," Charlotte said, articulating what Cal was also thinking. "Perfect hair, makeup, clothes, along with a perfect job...and daughter," she added. "Of course, it was never perfect, but now that the facade has crumbled, I think she has as well."

Bingo. And he wanted to believe this could be the start of Izzie dropping any and all charades and leading a real life. One where she didn't have such strict expectations for herself and Charlotte.

Would he be around to see that?

That was the question that flashed in his mind like a huge, tacky neon sign. Maybe. But maybe didn't feel like nearly enough to continue whatever it was he'd started with Charlotte. And that's why Cal loosened his grip on her, ready to put at least an inch or two of distance between them, since right now they were touching in a whole lot of places.

He moved, but Charlotte immediately took hold of him and pulled him back to her. She looked him straight in the eye. "You're trying to do the good-guy thing because you're not sure where things are going between us. You're not sure where you're going," she spelled out. "And I've just had this emotional punch from hell."

That was a darn good summary. "All of the above," he admitted.

She kept hold of his arm. Kept up the direct eye contact, too. "When I walked away from my mom, you were the first person I thought of. I wanted to come here. I wanted to see you."

He groaned because this was only confirming his fear that they were getting too close. But then, he realized something.

Charlotte and he were already close.

There was no getting to it.

"Hell," he muttered.

"Exactly," she said as if she knew exactly what he meant.

And she probably did. Because she had to know that just because they'd fallen for each other, it didn't mean everything was going to be as sweet as the Jolly Ranchers they were finishing up.

"What we do here in the next twenty minutes or so," Charlotte said, brushing a kiss on his mouth, "will not play into your decision about leaving."

He wasn't so sure about that at all, but that little touch of her mouth on his gave him a jolt of lust and no doubt dulled his mind. However, even the dullness wouldn't cloud the fact that it would play into his decision. Oh, he still might take the job, still might leave, but it would be with the sickening realization that he'd be leaving Charlotte behind. Which, in turn, meant neither of them would get out of this without dinged hearts.

"You're not going to question that twenty-minute remark?" she asked, giving him another of those light kisses. "I thought you might consider that to be an insult to your sexual prowess. It wasn't," she added. "I just figured we wouldn't be able to make out for long if we didn't have a condom."

And just like that, he got another debate with himself about whether or not to open his nightstand drawer. He lost that debate, opened it and took out one of the condoms he'd bought the day before.

"I even put one in my wallet," he admitted. "Just in case."

She smiled, a really big warm smile that quickly got covered up because he snapped her to him and kissed her. Cal didn't go with one of those lip brushes, either. Since this was probably a mistake of massive proportions, he made the kiss equally monumental. Easy to do since he'd been aching for Charlotte, and no amount of mental lectures and logic had been able to cool that ache.

The kiss did some cooling.

His body was practically cheering over it. But, of course, it then did the opposite of cooling and fired up that fierce need he had for her. Cal wasn't sure how he would ever be able to walk away from her, and at the moment he didn't even want to try to wrap his mind around it. He just wanted this kiss.

Just wanted Charlotte in his arms.

Charlotte was clearly on the same page as he was, and when the kiss deepened, the flavors of the remnants of the cherries and apples mixed together with Charlotte's own taste created an amazing sensation. If he'd had any resolve about not going through with this, that would have caused it to vanish.

"We've probably used up one of those twenty minutes," she whispered, her voice all silk and breath. It was damn hot, but then everything about her fell into that category. "It'll eat up another minute for me to get you undressed. Time me," she warned him a split second before she went after his shirt.

She didn't just take it off, however. She touched. And kissed, trailing her now damp mouth from his neck to his chest. By the time she reached his stomach, Cal figured any and all time had vanished from the known universe.

The kisses and touching didn't stop when she tackled his boots and belt. But they slowed just a little, and there was a naughty glint in her eye when she tongue-kissed his erection through the front of his jeans. Breath, mouth and heat. On his dick. A combination that caused him to snap.

Time returned to his universe but only because Cal decided he needed to break some speed records to get them both naked. Charlotte didn't help with that. She kept smiling, kept trying to torture him while Cal grappled to rid her of her top. No finesse whatsoever, but he hoped the prowess was there when he managed to pull her away from his dick and he took her right nipple into his mouth. It certainly caused her to moan in pleasure.

She moaned again when he slid his hand into her jeans, then her panties.

Cal savored the sound. Savored, too, that look on her face as he touched her. It was a look he wanted to press into his memory so he could always hold on to it.

It didn't last, though, because touching like that was no doubt torture for her, too, and like him, she intended for them to finish off each other with the use of that condom. That meant more clothing coming off. Jeans and underwear. And the removal probably would have been much faster had they both not continued to grope and kiss. By the time they were naked, there was an extreme urgency—emphasis on extreme —for them to get down to business.

Cal managed to get the condom on, and there was a little more maneuvering and handling before Charlotte flipped him onto his back and straddled him. He suddenly became very aware of something.

This was the best idea ever.

No competition whatsoever.

The bright light streaming in from the windows and the position gave him an unobstructed view of her amazing, naked body. All of it. And all of her was amazing. Especially when she took him inside her.

Yeah, that was memorable, all right.

Memorable and so intense with pleasure that it flooded through him. He reacted on instinct. A primal urge to take and claim. But Charlotte must have been trying to sate those same urges because she moved into that equally primal rhythm that he knew would build the heat. Until it was hotter and hotter.

It did.

Until the thrusts were faster and deeper. Until Cal was pretty sure she was close to the finish. But then she met his gaze and slowed the pace. Drawing out the pleasure. Giving them these extra moments.

Of course, the slow pace only kicked up the pace of the taking and claiming, and even though Cal wanted to hang on and on, that didn't happen. Charlotte began to move fast again, and he watched her face as the climax pulsed through her. He'd store that image away, too. That was the last thought he had before Charlotte got back to the movements that finished him.

C HARLOTTE LAY IN Cal's bed while he was in the bathroom. Her body was still humming from the climax. It was a sweet fluttering sensation that perhaps was akin to a really good sugar high.

But she dismissed that.

Nope, no sugar high could come close to matching this.

She'd come here to Saddlebrook in the worst of moods, and while she knew she'd have to deal with what had caused that mood—her mother—she welcomed this short reprieve. Her body certainly welcomed it, too, because Cal had indeed managed to cool some of the fire. It would return, of course, but for now the humming and flutters were enough.

Charlotte amended that notion when a stark-naked Cal came out of the bathroom. He grinned at her and then joined her back on the bed, where he kissed her. She kissed him back and smiled when his mouth was still against hers.

"We failed," she muttered.

He practically snapped back from her, clearly questioning how sex had been a failure when it'd been so darn good.

"It lasted more in the range of twenty-five minutes, not twenty," Charlotte explained.

He laughed, and mercy, it was good to hear it. Good to see his face when he was happy—and perhaps experiencing some fluttering, too. She wanted to hang on to this moment. Just this. When there were no dream-job offers on the table, where any thoughts of Izzie and Paul were firmly on the back burner and where everything was right with the world.

Charlotte wasn't sure how much time passed, perhaps less than thirty seconds, when the hanging-on vanished. Cal's phone rang, and because he'd also apparently set it on Vibrate, the pocket of his jeans started to jitter around.

He cursed, and she could tell he was considering letting it go to voicemail, but then something occurred to her. "If Paul showed up, Mandy might be calling."

That sent Cal scrambling off the bed so he could snatch up his phone. He froze when he looked at the screen, and that sent her scrambling. Oh, no. Something bad had happened.

"It's not Mandy," he said. "It's, uh, Rowan." Another ring, more buzzing. "After his last call, I added his name to my contacts," he said quietly.

She was about to tell him to answer it, but Cal did it without her prompt. After he took a deep breath, that is.

"Rowan," he greeted. "Sorry that I missed your last call."

Charlotte could hear the faint murmur of Rowan's voice, but she couldn't make out what he was saying. Whatever it was caused a serious mix of emotions of Cal's face. Happiness. Then not. Then something else she couldn't identify.

Cal cleared his throat. "I can make that happen," he said, but then paused. "I have a place in mind. Hold on a second, and let me see if it's all right." He muted his phone and looked at her. "Rowan's in Texas and wants to drive over so we can meet."

She practically bolted off the bed, ready to do a happy dance.

"He doesn't want anyone else from the family there," Cal specified. "And he doesn't want me to tell Audrey or Dad about his visit."

Charlotte didn't have to give that any thought to know it would be a challenge for Cal. He loved his family, and this would mean keeping a huge secret from them.

"I'm going to agree to that," Cal explained. "But I'd like to have the meeting at Port in a Storm. It's sort of neutral ground."

"Of course," she said as quickly as she could. Neutral ground, yes, but she was hoping she could also be there in case Cal ended up needing a shoulder after finally coming face-to-face with his half brother.

Cal took another breath and unmuted his phone. "I'll text you the address. It's not Saddlebrook," he was quick to add to Rowan. "It's a place for veterans, but there are rooms we can use to meet." Rowan responded, and Cal followed it up with, "See you then."

He ended the call but just stood there staring at his phone for a couple of seconds before he composed the text that was no doubt the address he'd promised Rowan.

"Uh, I need to shower and get dressed," Cal said. He checked the time. "Like, right now," he added.

"Right now?" she repeated, gathering up her own clothes.

Cal nodded. "Rowan's about twenty minutes out."