Chapter Seventeen

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Colby

T he next few weeks got busy around Harmony.

At least, it did for Vince and Colby. Their days were spent working on the farm and in the orchards, working on the garden at home, and brewing beer. Colby's new equipment had come in, and they'd started the remodel in his shop, getting it all cleaned up, organized, and Colby's brewing operation going. The second batch had been even better than the first, and he currently had two different styles fermenting.

They dug up the grass and rototilled the land, mixing it with composite soil to get it ready for Vince's garden, then got fruits and vegetables planted. Technically, this should have been done a little earlier in the year, but they would find a way to make it work. Colby wanted this for Vince, wanted him to have something at home that he loved, the way Colby had his beer. They also built a protective fence around the planting area to keep it safe from animals.

It had been hard work, and they hardly had any downtime, but Colby loved it, loved his life in a way he couldn't ever remember loving it before. It felt…right. Like even though he was still in Harmony and still working at Covington Acres, he had some things in his world that were just for him. It wasn't perfect. His mama still asked him about dating and still watched him with Vince as if wondering if something was going on with them, and random people around town would ask him when he was getting married or if he'd give his parents more grandbabies, but he could handle that.

Dennis still gave him shit about growing up and settling down, but Colby just blew him off. He might not be dating Vince, but they had what was probably the most real relationship Colby had ever had. He had Vince and his beer, and those two things were important to him.

And there was something exciting about no one knowing his secret except Vince. There were so many things the two of them shared, so many things he made Colby feel, that sometimes he couldn't wrap his head around what it all meant, so he usually tried not to think about it.

"Mmm. Mornin'." Vince rolled toward him, wrapping an arm around Colby's waist. He'd been lying there thinking while Vince was still sleeping. They were off at the farm today and would be heading to Roe and Holden's for a barbecue.

"Good morning," Colby replied, trying to get his mind off his thoughts from just moments ago, but it was hard when he couldn't help but notice how content he felt. It was a stark contrast to how unsettled he'd been before. Really, it didn't make much sense. He still didn't have any more experiences than before—well, other than the beer and being with a man, and it helped knowing they had trips planned. Plus, he thought a lot of it came simply from his friendship with Vince. "Cereal for breakfast?" He nuzzled Vince's throat. "Please."

"You can't bribe me into saying yes by distracting me with that sexy body and delicious mouth of yours."

Colby grinned into Vince's skin. Why was it so easy for Vince to make him happy? To have fun with Vince? "Oh, I think I can," Colby replied before lashing his tongue against Vince's collarbone. He trailed his hand down Vince's body, wrapping a fist around his hard shaft and giving it a slow stroke.

"Fucker. You don't play fair," Vince said, throaty and arching toward Colby.

"I'll blow you for Fruity Pebbles." He used his teeth to nip at Vince. He could have cereal if he wanted, obviously, but this was a fun game. He liked that Vince seemed to want to take care of him in some ways, that he liked cooking breakfast for Colby and that they could barter for Colby's daily sugar rush.

"I think my dick is a much better way to keep your mouth busy than your fake food."

He chuckled, kissing his way down Vince's body. "It's real food, asshole. But this works for both of us. I'll get my protein from you, and then I'll wash it down with something sweet." He dipped his tongue into Vince's belly button.

"I feel like I've created a monster, and I should probably feel bad about that, but I don't. Let me feel that talented mouth of yours, and you can have a whole fucking box of cereal if you want," Vince said, which was exactly what Colby wanted.

He took Vince's cock into his mouth, loving the morning musky scent of him and the taste of his skin. He was getting better at this, bobbing on Vince's cock in unison with his hand until Vince exploded in his mouth.

He was lucky enough to have Vince return the favor afterward, and when they sat down at the table, both opting for cereal for breakfast, Colby realized he basically hadn't stopped smiling all morning.

And it was all because of Vince.

"Hey, brother." Holden gave Vince a hug when they got to their place. Most everyone was there already. Their parents and siblings hadn't come out, but Clint, August, Deacon, Grady, and the kids were there, along with Merilee and Ozzy, and Lindsey and Larry.

"Hey, man," Vince replied, returning the affection before they headed toward the picnic tables where everyone was congregating.

Roe manned the grill. He thought of himself as a barbecue expert, something Colby liked to tease him about.

"Deke, did you bring us some ice cream?" Colby asked.

"Yep. I handled dessert for everyone." Deacon gave the kind smile he was known for, making his handsome face even more attractive.

"He's got a new flavor. It's a surprise, though," Grady added, wrapping his arm around his partner.

Colby felt a pinch in his chest. That wasn't anything new, not really. Being around all the happy couples…it reminded him at times that something inside him was broken, different from others because he wasn't capable of having that. Even when it came to Vince, they were similar in not wanting the marriage and all that, but Vince had been in love before. He had a feeling Vince would fall in love again someday. He'd just decided not to now because of fear.

Still, whatever it was Colby was feeling while looking at his friends didn't feel the same this time. He couldn't put his finger on what it was, and frankly, he didn't want to think about it right then. He just wanted to enjoy the day.

"Of course that's the first thing you ask about." Vince nudged him with his arm.

"Just making conversation," Colby countered.

"About treats. I notice you didn't ask your brother about those ribs that smell so good." He cocked a brow.

"Yeah, what's up with that?" Roe teased.

"Uh-oh. I don't want to get in the middle of a sibling rivalry," Deacon countered, and they all chuckled.

"The food smells good, but the ice cream will be better." Colby winked, and Roe playfully charged him. He dodged his brother, who came at him again, this time catching him.

They wrestled around like a couple of kids, until Colby managed to get the better of his brother, who said, "Goddamn it. I'm too old for this shit."

They were both on their backs and panting.

"You get better with age, darlin'." Holden held his hand out for Roe and pulled him to his feet, just as the kids approached, Wyatt holding his girlfriend's hand.

"Gross. The closer we get to the wedding, the mushier they get," Wyatt teased.

"I think it's sweet," Bianca added.

"Do you think it's sweet when your parents do it?" Wyatt asked, and she frowned.

"Okay, well, I can see your point."

"Hey"—Roe ruffled Wyatt's hair—"you should be happy you're surrounded by so much love."

"You know I am, Dad. I just wouldn't be doing my job as your son if I didn't give you crap."

"We taught him well," Lindsey added, and the group laughed again.

Colby went to stand up, but Vince held his hand out for him like Holden had done for Roe. Colby took it, letting his friend tug him to his feet, immediately noticing the absence of Vince's hand when he let go. That thought made his gut twist up some. Had he ever missed the touch of anyone else he was sleeping with before? He was positive he hadn't.

"You guys wanna play football?" Sean asked.

Scout and Reese immediately said yes. Colby noticed Scout's pink-painted nails, and Reese had his black. He loved that the kids felt comfortable being themselves in Briar County. Colby wasn't dumb. He knew that wasn't always the case, especially in small towns like theirs, but they had their safe space here. Colby understood how special Harmony was because of that.

"I think I'm going to hang with Bianca," Wyatt replied.

Sean crossed his arms. "She can play."

"No way," she replied. "You can go, though," she told Wyatt, who shook his head.

"Young love," Vince said softly to him, and Colby nodded, his pulse speeding in a way he didn't understand.

Sean rolled his eyes, but Colby wasn't sure anyone else saw it. "Now we don't have an even number. Uncle Holden?"

"You got it, kid." Holden looked at Vince. "You get your ass out there too, old man."

"Then we still have uneven numbers," Vince said, "but I also won't pass up an opportunity to kick your ass." He turned to Colby, placing a hand on his lower back. "Come on, babe. Play with us?" Vince asked just as Grady chimed in with, "I'll play too."

Colby's stomach was…wobbly. That was the most ridiculous way for a grown-ass man to think about it, but he couldn't pinpoint what else fit.

"I'm, um…I'm good." On reflex, he stepped away from Vince, whose forehead wrinkled.

"Good. We haven't caught up in a while," Clint interrupted, and Colby said a silent thank-you to his friend, while also wondering why in the fuck he would need an out with Vince. That wasn't how they worked.

Vince's brown eyes found his, and Colby gave a small shake of his head that he hoped said I'm fine . And he was. He didn't know why he felt off today. Maybe he was coming down with something.

The group playing football headed toward the open area in the yard, while Wyatt and Bianca separated from the others, finding a quiet spot to sit in the grass to watch them play.

"He's really into her," Roe said. "Always wants to be with her. I'm thankful he has that experience, but I worry he's not spending as much time with the boys and not doing a lot of the things he loves."

"He'll be fine. It's normal," Lindsey told him.

"Yeah, I figure so. I remember that with friends in high school. I guess I just never had it myself, so I'm more sensitive to it."

Colby got what his brother was saying. He hadn't had that because he was gay. He'd missed certain experiences, living where and when they had. Maybe it was different for kids nowadays, but though Roe had always been accepted and affirmed when he came out, it wasn't like he was dating boys at Wyatt's age. He'd left Briar County for that.

"You're the best dad in the world, and you want what's best for him," Lindsey added, the platonic love between them clear, but Colby couldn't stop thinking about what his brother had said. It wasn't something he'd thought about before—those growing-up things Roe had missed—and not for the first time, he thought about sharing his struggles with Roe. It was different, though. Roe was gay. Colby just didn't fall for people the way others did.

The subject changed then, and Colby went over to sit in one of the outdoor chairs by Clint. August was chatting with Deacon, and his friend had been sitting there alone.

"How are things going?" Clint asked softly, just for the two of them.

"Good…great, really. We started a garden at the house for Vince. He loves that shit." Colby chuckled.

"That sounds permanent," Clint replied, making Colby shift uncomfortably, his pulse kicking up. He knew Clint didn't mean anything by it. He never would have made that comment if he'd known the truth about Colby, but that didn't stop his discomfort…or the way his eyes darted toward Vince and the unexplainable warmth he felt when Vince shot him a smile.

"It's not what you're thinking." Colby forced himself to look away from Vince, but also not meeting Clint's gaze. "We're still just enjoying benefits with our friendship. That's all it will ever be." A weight draped over him at that, one that felt almost too heavy to carry and made no sense, not really. He didn't want anything more with Vince. That's why this worked so well for them.

"That's okay too." Clint reached over and squeezed his shoulder. "What matters is your happiness."

"I'm happy," Colby replied, then looked around to make sure no one was close enough to hear them. "Maybe happier than I've ever been. I can't even explain it, really. Nothing has changed other than the sex, but…" But what? He wasn't sure how to put into words what he wanted to say, not without it sounding like it was more than it was. He just knew he'd spent most of his life feeling incomplete, and that feeling was almost nonexistent now. "Don't really know."

"And that's okay too, man. You don't have to know. Just focus on what feels good."

Colby nodded and looked at the football players again. Vince was talking to Holden, the two of them laughing, and it made Colby smile.

Seeing Vince made him smile. So did talking to him, touching him, just being with him.

Colby continued to watch them, appreciating that Clint didn't call him on it, just let him have these moments where he was happy and confused but somehow everything felt okay.