Chapter 3

* * *

COLTON

A month later…

Colton staredat the chief in shock and disbelief. In one swift move, he turned halfway in his chair where he was seated looking at the other man, reached over, and slammed the office door shut – turning back toward Reese.

"Wanna run that past me again, sir?"

"Look, Colton," Reese began quietly, putting his elbows on the desk and resting his chin on his hands. "Let's talk openly. No egos, no pride, no hurt feelings. I know you are mad right now because I've been in your shoes, but hear me out, and let's look at this from a distance. You want to make chief someday, then you are going to have to take a different approach on things and make the hard decisions. This is one of them."

Colton swallowed and nodded tightly.

"As I was saying," Reese began. "You've got all the skills it takes and the time under your belt, but I know you've struggled in the engineer position. You've bolted into a fire after another team member more than once – and my goal is to get you back into the fight… but that won't be as a captain, brother. I don't need you doing crowd control and barking out orders – and honestly, with me caving and allowing you to fill in as the engineer after Julio quit was a mistake."

Colton sucked in his breath at the candid words being spoken between them – and waited. That was the hardest thing he'd ever done because everything in him wanted to argue his point. He was ready for captain, but there was something in the chief's voice that made him pause.

"Alex quit. Julio quit. You guys have been struggling for a while to stay cohesive as a team. Please interrupt me and tell me if I'm wrong," Reese paused, looking at him. "You want to be in the game, you like the rush of fighting a fire… and you worry about your teammates because you aren't there. Right?"

"Yes, sir."

"I understand," his chief said softly. "I really do because it was a drastic change for me that really hurt when someone got injured or died. As an engineer, your job is to maintain the truck – and that takes you from the front lines. As a captain, you'll be monitoring, talking to the media, and keeping people back, all while monitoring your team and their safety. You will rarely enter the building. You'll have the rank, but you won't be hands-on in that position either. Do you understand what I'm trying to point out to you?"

Colton sat there stiffly, thinking and processing everything.

"You, Alec, and Lance are close – and there is so much potential for you three to sync into an actual team, but only if the players are in the right spots. You need to be back in the thick of it, where you excel and honestly, Alec and Lance need you there to save their butts."

"What's your plan, sir?" Colton asked stiffly, his voice trying not to sound resentful or angry because he could see Reese's point of view – and he was right. He did want to help his team, but the need to step forward for the open position of captain was hard not to take.

"Well," he began, getting out a sheet of paper and scribbling before him. Obviously, the older man had thought this out quite a bit because he could see notes, hash marks, and other scribbles on a paper just below Reese's elbow. "I have an engineer who has requested moving to our firehouse from another station – and I have two capable people who have requested the position of captain for the truck to give us a full team."

"Who's the other person?"

"Lance."

"I quit."

Reese barked out a laugh and shook his head.

"I'm teasing you… and I know," he chuckled. "Lance actually requested you be moved back on the line with him."

"He did?"

"Yeah, something about ‘he's not scared of Chuck-E-Cheese' – whatever that means…"

Colton chuckled, knowing Lance was referring to rats and mice again. That man was utterly afraid of rodents, which made him giggle. He put a little stuffed one in his bunk once, and the younger man has stripped his bed ever since.

"How would you feel about Justin Dailey taking over as captain – and that does not leave this room, Colton," Reese warned sternly, pointing at him.

"Justin… from the other truck? Won't that put them short of a person?"

"Chase isn't going anywhere and is after my position. I don't plan on quitting or retiring anytime soon, so we are both where we need to be. Andy is asking for an engineer position, but I think he would do better staying with a team that has an experienced engineer who moved to captain…"

"Chase," he finished, staring at the paper that Reese was slowly drawing an arc on. "So we move Andy up to engineer to take Justin's spot. Chase can coach Andy. We bring in an engineer that Justin can coach – and Justin becomes your captain because he has a team of three linemen that he can trust to have each other's backs."

"I see."

"It's not personal, but the best decision for the truck and the team. Don't you agree?"

"When am I going to get my chance?"

"When you are ready to give up the front lines and take more of a mentor, teaching role. I believe you are close but not there yet… and it's not skill. You have that in spades, Colton, but rather, you still crave the excitement and the fight – and I respect that. I would rather have you mad at me now for this choice rather than lose you because you were no longer satisfied with your job or lost interest in being a firefighter."

They sat there looking at each other – when Reese finally spoke again.

"No one is saying you aren't capable, but your heart is still out there fighting and rushing into the fire. Even in your personal life, you like the thrill and then end it when it fades. Being a part of something greater takes sacrifice, dedication, and devotion – and while I believe you are ready in your mind, your heart isn't ready yet."

"Thank you, sir," Colton said abruptly, getting to his feet because that comment stung deeper than the other man realized. The last woman he'd had a serious relationship with was Eris and that had been only a few years ago. "When is this happening?"

"I'm making the announcement at the Christmas party next week."

"I see."

"Please do not say a word. I still need to confirm the transfer for Chad to your truck and our station."

"I won't. May I be excused?"

"Of course."

Colton walked out of the office and felt eyes on him, trying to ignore all of them to prevent him from dealing with the questions – and the shame of being passed over. Oh, he agreed with Reese's assessment of him, the team, and the decision; but it still hurt.

He also didn't need the thoughts of Eris brought up again – he was having a hard enough time burying her memory as it was! He shoved on the front door angrily, taking pleasure in the sound of the slam against the building as he stormed out in frustration. This was not how he intended to finish his rotation, but maybe spending the next three days at home stewing was just what he needed.

Going home, he ignored everything and turned off the ringer on his phone. Word would spread that he'd stayed late this morning to talk to Reese, and whether the chief realized it or not – they'd set a perpetual clock into motion by their meeting. Something was going to have to give… and quickly.

Walking straight to the fridge, he nearly tripped over his sneakers and yanked open the door, grimacing. He was not eating three-day-old leftover fried chicken. Sighing, he went to his ‘go-to' and yanked open the vegetable drawer that held several packages of lunch meat instead. Pulling out several, a slice of Kraft cheese, and yanking out the mayo, he screwed open the lid and smelled it warily.

Still good.

He grabbed the loaf of bread from the cabinet and winced at the fuzzy slice toward the back of the loaf, growling out a foul word as he rolled his eyes. He pulled two slices of what looked like ‘okay' bread from the front of the loaf and pitched the rest of it in the trash. Going to the grocery was not even on his list of things to do around the house – but it was there now.

"Dang it…" he muttered, slapping together a thick sandwich and taking a massive bite, standing there in the kitchen. Chewing, he looked around and sighed loudly, echoing off the empty walls.

The house was a dump – but it was his dump and dirt cheap. Buying a place ‘As-Is' wasn't for the faint of heart. No, his house needed some serious work and he did it a little at a time. It was in a good part of town, not far from the school or the fire station, yet had been allowed to get run down by the previous owner. But for a mortgage payment of less than eight hundred bucks a month – he could live with the dated look and hard work.

When he moved in six months ago, the first thing he'd done before even unpacking was take a box knife to the carpet… yanking it all out. The stench of animal urine had been suffocating.

"Boy, that was an undertaking…" he chuckled, rolling his eyes at the memory. As he'd pulled the fifty-year-old shag carpeting original to the house, every bit of grime, dander, dust, and even the occasional earring, had showered him. He knew it would be bad, but not that bad. Nope. He'd hooked up a garden hose and literally doused himself and his clothing on the back porch before re-entering his new home.

Since then, the carpet had been replaced along with four windows on the house. A new window unit had been replaced in the master bedroom window because he couldn't afford central air just yet. Yeah, his next three days off were supposed to be used to pull off the wood paneling from another bedroom and patch all the holes that he assumed were there because they were in every wall he'd stripped so far. Then came the task of painting the room, including the ceiling, due to cigarette smoke, again from the previous owner.

He nearly devoured the sandwich in three large bites and chugged down two stadium cups full of tap water just so he could fill his stomach before bed. Walking toward the bedroom, he opted to skip the shower due to exhaustion, and he didn't really relish looking at the pink tile with the cracked grout lines or the leaking showerhead. Nope. That was just a reminder of more work to do, and he already had the tile sitting in a box in the garage – it was just getting to it and having the energy for it.

Stripping on his way to the bed, he collapsed on top of the sheets and blankets, reaching up with a blind hand for the knob on the window unit nearby. Grunting with effort, he stretched and managed to turn it on, before collapsing onto his pillow and letting himself slide into oblivion.