Chapter Nine

Four Months Later

Pasha

I looked around the empty space that was to be my little studio apartment. I'd been working, doing overtime, and picked up a second job to save enough money to move into my own place. Living with Avyn had been wonderful. She was encouraging; she was my shoulder to cry on and my voice of reason. There were so many times when I wanted to give up, but she pushed me to keep moving forward.

As great as it had been living with my best friend and rebuilding our friendship every day, I most certainly felt like I was a burden to her. She always assured me she loved having me there, and I was welcomed for as long as I needed to stay. Again, I appreciated that, but I needed to go.

Today was a day I had been anticipating for a while now. I'd been touring apartments for two weeks, and nothing quite felt like me. Then Avyn told me that her building had a vacancy. It was perfect because I'd grown familiar with the area and didn't have to change my routine when getting to and from my second job.

"Does everything look good?" asked Marie from the leasing office.

I turned to her with a smile. "Everything looks perfect."

"Awesome! Well, I have your leasing agreement right here on the iPad. I'll review everything with you, you'll pay your deposit, and then we're good to go!"

We stood at the small bar area while she went over the agreement as thoroughly as possible. Once she was done, I signed it and handed over my money order for the deposit. My excitement peaked when she handed over my keys. This wasn't just an apartment. It was a home that I'd secured all on my own.

Someone had taken care of me my entire life. Someone always had the power to say,"You wouldn't have that if it weren't for me." Not anymore. Now, I was taking care of myself. At twenty-eight years old, I felt like I was finally beginning to live for the first time. I had to admit it felt good.

After securing the keys on my key ring, I locked up and headed upstairs to Avyn's apartment. When I walked in, she looked like she was just getting home. She stood at the kitchen counter, sifting through mail.

"Hey, boo," she said, glancing up. "Did you sign your lease?"

"I did! I'll be out of your hair soon."

She dropped the mail and gave me her attention. "Don't do that. You have always been more than welcomed here, Pash."

"I know, I know. I'm joking. I really appreciate you, Avyn. You've been an angel."

"It was nothing, girl. I know if the tables were turned, you would do the same for me. I'm so happy things are looking up for you."

"Yeah... me too. It's been a long journey, and it's not over yet."

While I would have liked my divorce to be over and done, it was at the point of things getting nasty. Raymond expected me to be docile about everything. He expected me not to contest the divorce, and he would just be able to ride off into the sunset with his pregnant mistress. That's why he offered to pay for my lawyer.

He and his lawyer had compiled a team of legal representation they were willing to pay for. The problem with that was the fact everybody on the list was someone that he knew and would likely screw me over.

My friend Blake's sister, Sandra, was a divorce attorney. She took my case pro bono. Not only that, but she also was fighting to get me everything she said I deserved. She filed a motion going after Raymond for adultery, abandonment, cruelty, isolation, and emotional distress. She was seeking alimony and was trying to have him continue to pay for my therapy. When my wedding ring was pawned, I took that money to pay for my therapy. Maybe I could have put it off, but I did what I felt was best for me at the time. I needed to maintain that relationship for my sanity.

Raymond was livid the first time we went to court. He couldn't control the narrative, and he couldn't control me. He walked into the courtroom expecting to see his friend standing beside me as my representative. The smile on his face dropped when Sandra appeared at my side. She was one of the top divorce attorneys in the state. If he had made a valid effort to really get to know my friends, he would have known she was Blake's sister.

He managed to get my number from the court documents, and every so often, he called me from a blocked number, harassing me. I'd recorded his rants to present in court per Sandra's advice.

"Hey..." Avyn grabbed my hand, causing me to break out of my thoughts. "It may not be over, but I'm so proud of your handling everything."

"I'm trying."

"How about we go do some shopping? Somebody has a new apartment that needs furnishing!"

I smiled. "I can't go overboard now. This is a case of only having enough for the deposit."

"Actually..." She reached into her purse and handed me an envelope.

My brows furrowed. "What's this?"

"Just a little love offering from the girls and me. We know you're saving for a car and didn't want you to dip into those funds. We wanted to at least help you get the essentials... pots and pans, towels, cleaning supplies... stuff like that. Oh, and you can take the bedroom furniture from the guest room. I'm getting a new one for my room and moving the old one in there."

"Avyn... That's too much. You've already given me more than I could ask for."

"You didn't ask. I offered, and you'll take it even if I have to drag it downstairs myself. What am I saying? I don't do manual labor. I'll call up Mr. Officer to help move it. He's been asking to see me anyway."

I shook my head. "So you're gonna put him to work?"

"I'll work him out afterward." She winked at me as she slung her purse over her shoulder. "Come on. I'm sending the girls a text. They can meet us for drinks when we're done. You have every reason to celebrate right now. I'm not taking no for an answer."

I rolled my eyes. "Okay, okay. Just let me grab my purse."

I headed to the guest room. After swiping my purse from the dresser, I started for the door. That's when I saw my journal on the dresser. I realized that I hadn't reflected on my daily feelings. Every day, I wrote one word that described how I was feeling. It helped me with keeping track of my moods. Flipping to today's date, I uncapped the pen and wrote the word... grateful.

That was the first and only thing that came to mind. Today, it was the most befitting.

Avyn and I had been in Splurge, a superstore in town, for almost two hours now.

God was really on my side today. Almost every item I would need was on sale or clearance. Avyn and I had to grab another shopping cart to carry it all. We finally made our way into a checkout line. Because it was Splurge, only a few lanes were open, and they were backed up along with self-checkout.

"I don't know why we love coming to this ghetto-ass place," Avyn said, examining her nails.

"It's a one-stop shop," I answered.

"Yeah, where you can catch a sale, a headache, hands, or a bullet."

I giggled. "Why are you so dramatic?"

"You know I'm extra. It's been that way since we were chaps. Nothing has changed."

Her gaze drifted to the crowd around us. A smirk spread across her face as she nodded to the left of me.

"Speaking of things not changing, your angel still looks as beautiful as ever."

I looked up to see the face of my rescuer. I hadn't seen him since he dropped me off at the hotel four months ago. I'd often thought of him, hoping he was blessed for his kindness. I almost forgot that I needed to pay him back with everything going on. Well, I hadn't forgotten. I just wanted to be in a better position.

He must have felt our eyes on him because he looked in our direction. A smile spread across his face. Avyn waved at him, and immediately, he began walking toward us.

"Why would you wave?" I whisper-yelled.

"Why not? I told you months ago that man wanted to check on you. Act right!" She plastered a smile on her face as he approached us. "Mr. Ellis. How nice to see you."

"Good afternoon."

He extended his hand, and she didn't hesitate to shake it. When he turned to me, his smile brightened.

"Mrs. Sinclaire. It's nice to see you."

"Mr. Ellis. It's nice to see you too."

"How are you? How is everything?"

"Well... Things are better than where we left them. I'm still going through the divorce process, but things are looking up. I signed a lease for an apartment today."

He looked at the items in the carts and smiled. "That's great to hear. I'm really happy for you. I, uh... I've thought about you."

"You have?"

"Yes." He looked down at his feet. "When I left you, something stuck with me. I guess I worried that you would be okay. Now that I've seen you, maybe my mind will rest."

"If you worried, why didn't you ever reach out? I know Avyn told you where I worked."

He chuckled. "Well, given the circumstances, I wasn't sure how you would take me checking up on you. I didn't want to come off as creepy."

Avyn tapped my arm. "Don't give the man the third degree, Pasha."

"I'm not!" I cleared my throat. "I appreciate your prayers and concern."

"It's no problem. If you need any help moving, I'm available."

"Oh, I don't—"

Avyn cut me off. "That would be wonderful! Is your number still the same?"

"It is."

"Great. I'll text you the address tomorrow morning."

I looked at her like she had two heads. What the hell was she thinking?

"Tomorrow is good. I'll see you then."

He left us with a smile and continued along his merry way. I slapped Avyn's arm.

"What are you doing?!"

"Setting the stage for you to get a good man."

"I don't want a man. Period. Have you forgotten that I'm in the middle of a divorce?"

"I haven't. If Raymond can move on while you two are together, you can move on now. I'm not saying jump in headfirst, but you could always use a friend."

"That's why I have you."

"And I love you. But I can't offer you the kind of friendship he can. You know what I'm talking about." She wiggled her eyebrows at me.

I scoffed. "You think I would sleep with that man?"

She snorted. "Shit, I would."

"I can't with you." I folded my arms. "Are you really going to give him your address? What happened to you calling Mr. Officer to help us?"

"I'm still calling him. The more manpower we have, the better. You know I don't do that kind of manual labor. I just got my nails done, and I'm not trying to break one."

I rolled my eyes as I turned back to the slowly moving line. I wasn't sure if I wanted this man to know where I lived. What if he showed up unannounced? What if he was really on some creepy shit? He knowing where I laid my head didn't sit right with me. I had enough of a messy situation and didn't know what kind of drama he could have with him. The last thing I needed was some woman to roll up behind him, threatening to fight me over a man that I didn't even want.

"Get out of your head," Avyn whispered in my ear, causing me to jump.

I wish I were able to do that. I'd been in my head for so many years that I didn't know what it was like to live worry and stress free. I knew Avyn meant well, but I got the feeling that this wasn't going to be anything like she was hoping for. I prayed that Mr. Ellis didn't have any ideas about me. He was there to help—nothing more, nothing less.