32. Cary

32

Cary

I just couldn’t anymore. I’d spent too much time trying to avoid my attraction to Evan. Pretending like I didn’t want him, need him, that I’d be content simply being friends. When he stood there in that tiny excuse for a robe, his hair still dripping and smelling like the most delicious dessert, I had to know.

Did he want me like I wanted him? He had given signs and had even kissed me, but that wasn’t enough to know for sure. So, I had to ask. Finally, when he kissed me, thrusting himself onto me, I had my answer.

After that, screw everything else. I wanted him, he wanted me, and fuck if we weren’t going to explore that to the fullest extent possible.

Evan had given me all of himself, he held nothing back, and my heart, whether I approved or not, reacted with pure affection.

I lay on my back as the afterglow swept over me. Evan cuddled against me, and I didn’t think I’d been this happy in my entire life.

“So, are you okay?” Evan asked, and I smiled.

“Oh, so very good. You?” I asked. Unable to move yet, I glanced over at him.

He closed his eyes, a small smile playing on his lips.

We stayed like that for several minutes before he squirmed. “Gotta go clean up,” he said, causing me to laugh. I’d been fucked enough times to know what he meant, especially if it’d been a while.

When he returned, he had a wet towel that he handed me, then sat on the side of the bed. “I-I know I’m not much to look at, Cary, and if you regret this or wish we hadn’t done it, I won’t be upset. I’d prefer to, you know… know before I start having feelings and all.”

I leaned up, pulling him to me. “Where’s this coming from?” I asked.

Evan shook his head. “I’m overthinking. I do that. Just ignore me. I enjoyed it.”

I guided his chin up, so he was looking me in the eye. “I think you are one of the most handsome men I’ve ever met, Evan, and I really liked having sex with you.” Evan humphed like he didn’t believe me. “Hey, are you questioning my taste?”

He smiled then, but it was tempered. “No, but you don’t have to give me false platitudes. I know I’m a plain Jane.”

“You fishing for compliments?” I asked, pulling him back into bed and onto his back before crawling back on top.

He laughed. “Oh god, you feel so good on me.” He leaned up and kissed me, then wiggled out from under me. “Listen, I’m just being honest with you and myself. I’m not on your level, I know that. You’re like a ten, and I’m like four or a five at most.” He moved toward the bathroom, with me on his heels. “I’m just saying, if this is just sex, let me know upfront because I tend to get close, fast, and I’ve already got a sore heart. I don’t want another anytime soon.”

“Okay, I’ll play. Tell me what’s so plain about you.”

He turned back toward me instead of turning on the water for the shower. “Um, okay. I’ve got a dent right here,” he said, pointing at his right cheek above his mouth.

“Your dimple?” I asked, and he nodded.

“Yeah, my dimple. It makes me look old.”

I cocked an eyebrow, sure he was giving me grief. “Okay, what else?”

Evan turned toward the mirror and sighed. “My eyes are too big and too close together. And my eyelashes just make them look bigger.”

“You know those are assets, right? Who told you all this?” I asked, beginning to see where this was likely going.

“Oh, well, mostly my ex, Andy. He seemed to love pointing out my flaws.”

I gently grasped Evan by the shoulders and turned him toward me, cupped his beautiful, dimpled face in my hands, and kissed him. He pulled back, smiling, but it was forced.

“Okay, Evan Garland, I need you to listen to everything I’m about to say. I don’t know this ex of yours, but if what you’re telling me is true, it’s pretty classic narcissistic behavior. Point out someone’s best qualities and convince them they’re flaws. You said he told you your dimple made you look old. Dimples are basically beauty marks, on men especially. And your eyes are your best feature, like model’s eyes even, and people spend lots of money putting on fake eyelashes to make them look long and dark like yours.”

Evan stared at me, looking confused. “So, you don’t think I’m plain-looking?”

I would’ve laughed at the absurdity of his question had I not known the reason he asked. His asshole of an ex had clearly warped Evan’s perception of himself, and that pissed me off. This sweet man didn’t deserve to be treated that way, no one did.

“Evan, you are so far from plain-looking. I honestly thought for a moment you were either fishing for compliments, or playing down your looks, so you didn’t make me feel bad about mine.”

His eyes registered surprise. “Oh, no, I wouldn’t. Cary, you’re so strong and handsome. I-I feel like a paper bag next to you. I should be more like other guys and not get all emotional just because we had sex.”

“You should be you, and stop letting other people’s nasty talk define who you are. I like you, Evan, because you are sweet, smart, and quick-witted, and you’re also hot as fuck! I’ve wanted you since I picked you up at the train station. I didn’t pursue you harder because you were overwhelmed with all that’s going on here, but don’t for a second think I didn’t want to.”

A tear slipped out of Evan’s eye, and he quickly wiped it away. “I’ve wanted you so much, too, but I just thought I was too plain. I still do, but thanks for making me feel different about it, okay?”

I nodded and secretly thought about how I’d love to punch that ex of his. Stupid fucking narcissistic asshole. After my dad and mom broke up, she’d dated one, and he’d made her feel less about her gifts, her looks, and he tore down everything about her. When she finally got rid of him, it took years for her to regain her self-esteem, and she was a powerful witch. I could only imagine what this man had done to Evan.

“You’re quiet,” Evan said, taking a step closer to me.

“Just pondering the nasty spells I could cast on your ex. I’ve never been so tempted to channel my powers for ill-use in my life, but enough about him. Come here. Let’s shower together. I have ways of using that cute face of yours that don’t require talking.”

Evan laughed as I pulled him into a kiss and drew him into the shower. I ended up giving him a blow job because I wanted him to feel… special, wanted, handsome. I wanted him to see himself for everything he was, and at that moment, giving him pleasure was the only way I knew how to do that.