5

The nightmare started the way it always did, with me standing in my temple and Aesop saying what he did, Hera's cruel words, hands touching me that shouldn't… But then she was gone, and I was staring into Colton's beautiful eyes.

And he killed Aesop.

He'd made his staff appear and plunged it into the man holding me while I was human weak.

Isiah broke the magic on the temple, and I was strong again.

Demarcus was tearing open the throats of the other priests while a wolf killed the others.

By the time I turned around, they were all dead, Colton's staff still in Aesop's chest.

"I hate that I even have a drop of that monster's blood in me. You can't think I'd ever be on his side, right?" Colton whispered as I kept starting.

The wolf that I knew was Jamie somehow plopped down next to me as if wanting to be praised for doing a good job. I scratched him behind the ears as if it was the most normal thing in the world and muttered a thanks to Isiah and Demarcus for saving me.

I woke with a start, Jamie's face buried in my hair, and his hand on my stomach. I felt too trapped even if I wasn't and used my power to move out of bed so I didn't wake him.

And dressed myself.

I didn't realize where I was going until I was standing in front of the entrance to the underworld. I walked right in and past Cerberus, muttering that I owed him treats and apologizing for his neglect.

The air was as suffocating as I remembered, and I didn't want to walk all through it and search for her. I didn't want to risk calming down or returning to my sanity.

I wanted to be this upset.

I appeared in front of Hera and found her chained up by my brother's power. She stared at me with hate and her crazy, blame filling her eyes.

The whip was in my hand before I even realized what I was doing.

"You wouldn't dare," she taunted me. "You were always too weak, Kismet."

"You killed Kismet. She's gone," I whispered, my voice sounding unlike mine and haunted. My arm moved and the whip hit her, her cry of pain not even registering.

Or maybe healing me? I wasn't sure, but I did it over and over again.

I watched blood drip from Hera and hit the ground. It was like I saw it, but it wasn't me.

I whipped her until I didn't have the strength to lift my arm anymore. My chest heaved from exertion as I stared at the bloody sobbing mess that was my sister-in-law and my biggest threat.

And all I wanted was the strength to kill her.

I screamed as someone touched me and turned to defend myself.

The whip stopped before it reached them, their power not allowing it to touch them. It took me another few moments to register who and what happened.

"Hades!" I gasped, immediately dropping the whip when I realized it was him. I held up my hands and backed away from him. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean—I didn't realize it was—"

"I'm fine, Sister," he whispered. "Don't touch her. Back away."

"She's broken," Hera chuckled darkly. "I didn't kill her, but I did win."

"Shut up, you beast," Poseidon snapped.

"She's right," I choked out as I sank to my knees. "All I want is the strength to end her so I can stop living in fear she'll finish what she started. The dream has changed, but she'll still—it's not over."

"I won't let her hurt you, Sister," Hades muttered. "I swore that to you, and I will keep my promise." He moved to kneel in front of me. "What happened tonight?"

I blinked at his hands that were near me but didn't touch mine. Then I looked at the blood on my hands… Hera's blood. "The nightmare changed after all of these years. It scared me."

That probably made no sense to him—it didn't to me, but I was so fixated on the blood.

And then it was gone.

I looked up at his face and wanted to cry when I saw how cold and distant his once-kind eyes were. "I'm sorry I ruined everything. I ruined us."

"You ruined nothing. You were right that there is still time and we can fix it all. I have faith in you still—in us. Have faith in us too, Sister." He offered me a hand, and I knew it was a challenge more than an offer for help.

Still, I took it. He was reaching out to me, and after abandoning Hades to the underworld, I would always take it.

He stood and brought me to the now-cleaned-up and healed Hera.

And she had to be gagged if she was quiet. He touched her and I felt a surge of power.

My eyes went too wide and he smirked, nodding that he'd done exactly as I'd thought. He'd given me some of her power.

I didn't know how to handle that—any of this or what I'd done, so I left.

I just went home, not thinking about how I looked or the state I was in.

And the horror on Colton's face at the condition I was in when I appeared in my kitchen probably said exactly what I looked like.

The shock on my face at him sitting at my kitchen table in only boxer briefs eating my fucking leftover dinner was probably the only thing that snapped him out of his surprise.

He cleared his throat and focused back on the food. "I apologize, but I woke sitting here with my staff in hand. I was depleted, and there was blood on my staff. I'm not going to ask what happened or why you brought me here, but I was starving, and you weren't here. So… Please don't send me back yet. I'm shaky and…"

I sank to the ground and was grateful when he stayed where he was and didn't come help me, didn't touch me. It took me several minutes before I could calm my racing heart or make my mouth work, still overloaded from the power Hades gave me.

The first thing I did was use my power to clean myself up and then I went to the fridge for something to drink, bringing him a water as well. I didn't sit with him but leaned against the counter.

"The nightmare changed tonight," I admitted, thinking it was only fair for him to know that if he had been involved. "It started as normal but you killed Aesop instead of what really happened. Jamie and Demarcus killed the others while Isiah broke the magic that had been placed on my temple. I woke and went to confront Hera where she's being kept."

He frowned. "So who's blood was on my staff? It couldn't have been his."

"I don't think anyone," I said after a minute. "It would be on the table if it had been real. You were dressed in my nightmare. It was probably some sort of echo. Maybe you were dreaming of me at the same time or—Isiah and Jamie would be in some state of the dream as well if I had really involved you all. Demarcus is awake."

He slowly nodded before raising his head, giving me a look full of such sorrow it twisted my insides. "I wish that was what happened. Truly. If it was within my power or I could have—I would have made that your reality, Arabella. Even if it meant I was never born."

And the fool truly meant it. He would have sacrificed his whole damn family tree so I'd never been brutalized and suffered for thousands of years.

I didn't know what to say to that or how to handle his feelings when my own were such a mess. I looked over at my empty living room area and made the same couch I had in the apartment appear. After studying it a few moments, I made it bigger to fit the space and a different color for the lighting.

Then I added the blankets he liked and a few pillows.

That was my permission for him to stay. Hopefully, I'd made that clear.

Well, that, and I didn't send him back. He couldn't get home unless he wanted to walk all the way in his boxer briefs.

As I reached the stairs, I made a lot of treats. I always needed them when I was out of sorts, and Colton had to be after waking in my house in that condition. No matter how much I hated him or what had happened between us, I had never meant to… I wasn't trying to torture him.

I wanted to cut him out of my life and move on.

I swallowed a snort.

Sure I did. Clearly, my subconscious really did.

Jamie woke when I entered the bedroom, blinking around and rubbing his eyes. "Colton's here. Are you okay?"

"No," I whispered, tears filling my eyes. "A lot's happened, and I don't even know how to explain it all. I did something weird even for me, and I need to know if you're okay?"

He slowly nodded. "I had a weird dream that I protected you in wolf form. My wolf is upset that he hasn't met you yet. I meant to ask if you would meet him now that we're being intimate, but he's being pushy. Also, I wanted to talk to you about adult stuff."

I nodded too. "The twins suggested you have your own room so it's not like we're living together-living together yet and I can be…"

"I think that's perfect. I just want my stuff not in limbo."

"Thank you, Jamie," I rasped. I tried not to cry, I really did, but… Yeah, I quietly cried.

He was amazing and held me in the shower, needing to shower off the nightmare and the underworld. He washed me and promised everything would be okay.

"Your phone has been going nuts while we were in the shower," Jamie informed me.

And it was Isiah. That couldn't be good.

I brought him over to the kitchen, hoping Colton would handle him for the moment, and texted Demarcus asking to speak. I also summoned my brothers while using my power to dry off and dress.

Same with Jamie.

A few minutes later, we were all gathered in my kitchen, and I defaulted to my normal of making more food appear when I was unsettled. "I apologize for the time, but I did something new, and it affected Colton and Jamie, so I thought I should check on the two of you as well. Then I saw you were trying to contact me, Isiah."

"I did some magic unfamiliar to me, but I don't know what I did," he blurted, his heart racing too fast.

"But you didn't," Colton said firmly, giving me a look. "He hasn't done it. He just thinks he did. His magic has not done that spell. He cannot. He's not powerful enough."

I nodded that I understood, explaining to all of them what happened.

"This is my fault," Hades said, upset in his cold eyes. "I apologize."

"You've been giving us Zeus's power," Poseidon stated, his voice carefully devoid of emotion.

"Yes."

I did a double take at Hades's response, unable to process it after all of the hits of the night. "I'm too upset in this moment to understand, Brother. Please explain to me where your head is at. Please make this make sense to me and why you didn't tell us."

"I actually understand this and agree with it," Poseidon cut in, shocking both of us. "The mistake was not telling us or not telling Arabella when she is already struggling, but I could have made the same mistake given we are not her. We are struggling trying to protect you when we did not and let you protect us from too much."

"Yes," Hades agreed. "Especially when you said you wanted my protection and I finally can protect you."

But that was all he said as if afraid to say more, so Poseidon took over. "He thought about what we said about how to take matters over from Zeus. It's not about war or letting him be as he is. Hades is stronger and can punish Zeus now. But Hades is already stronger, and we both know Zeus's power corrupted him. Hades is smart enough to have learned from that mistake."

Shock flashed in Hades's eyes before it was gone. "Thank you, Brother."

Poseidon did a double take, his gaze softening. "You were never greedy, Hades. You're trying to punish Zeus but balance the scales. Zeus feared you trying to take him over. That was his idiocy. You never wanted it. He intentionally undercut Arabella and me so we could never help—you want things even.

"Giving yourself some of Zeus's power as punishment will also make him a martyr. Hera too. Others will blame Arabella. She came back and now twisted you—all lies they will say anyways and none will believe, but if you give yourself power, there will be something for them to point to. That is also why you didn't tell us."

"Yes," Hades confirmed. "But also that you both plan to do something with the power. Zeus does nothing with it. Nothing at all, and it upsets many of us. I keep order of the underworld and souls, punish the evil, at least for as much as he and many judge me. I don't like it—I never wanted the job, but it has to be done!"

He cleared his throat and looked away.

"I'm sorry, Brother," I whispered.

"The fault is not yours."

"It's all of ours," Poseidon accepted.

"It's all of ours," I agreed, glad when Hades nodded, at least not blaming himself fully anymore. "And thank you." I gave him the best smile I could when he looked at me. "I think it's a great answer to the problem."

He studied me for several moments. "I find that surprising."

"I am fragile, Brother," I rasped. "Hera's right that she broke me." I tried to wipe the tears before they fell, but I wasn't fast enough. "It's not even to be self-serving that I want more power to feel safer. It is the best way to handle Zeus and that psycho. They won't ever stop until maybe they are weak and have nothing left."

"And we have each other to keep ourselves in line," Poseidon said firmly. "You are most powerful, but you are listening to us, hearing our advice. You will never become Zeus or out of control then, Brother." He gestured between the two of us. "We have faith in you and that we can do this now that we've stopped listening to Zeus."

"Aye," I agreed. I went over to Hades and hugged him. "Thank you for earlier. I'm sorry I almost struck you. I would never hurt you. I was so…"

"I felt it," he whispered. "I felt your pain before my minions alerted me. I am so sorry for what you suffered, Sister."

"I hate to interject, but I thought I had fed and killed but didn't remember," Demarcus muttered.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered as I parted from Hades. "I didn't realize until I talked to Colton that…" I shook my head. "I'm so sorry."

"I've done enough to you to deserve this," he said sadly. "But maybe I can start to make amends for that." He held out a business card to me. "I found a psychiatrist who is a vampire. An old one. She doesn't practice anymore but has kept up with the field. She focuses on complex PTSD and compounding traumas like war and such. She's willing to help."

"You cannot think…" Hades started to say but trailed off when I immediately took the card. "I apologize, Sister."

I shrugged. "Maybe it's nothing, but Nan who works for me said nothing helped her more than speaking with a group of others who understood her pain. She said it was the only way she made it through." I gestured to the four men who I had done something to from my dream. "And if now I can mess with them too…"

"Hey, all of us are fine, and I think it's a sign you're healing, Arabella," Jamie said easily as he made me face him. He nodded and smiled when I frowned. "Now you see that if Hera comes for you, it won't be the same as before. The past won't repeat itself. Maybe you just need different wards here or you needed this conversation with your brothers."

He shrugged like it was no big deal.

I didn't think it was that simple, but I was hopeful that maybe he could be right. Still, I was glad that all four of them weren't mad at me. Demarcus was upset that I wasn't ready to just fix things after our disaster of a date, but he'd done it, and I had too much else going on. He accepted that and it was all on my timetable.

I did still want to fix things with Isiah, but again… So much was on my plate. And now, apparently, I was messing with them in my sleep.

I told my brothers that I'd really liked having a late Sunday lunch with them last week and hoped we could do it again. Even with the twins and others of our family, maybe make it a weekly thing. Just food and being together, simple, and leave the rest outside.

They seemed to accept that and looked as happy to hear that I'd had as nice of a time as they'd had. I sent texts inviting Dion and Chen, as well as the twins, apologizing for it being last-minute and assuring them that we did want them to come, but time just always flew too fast.

Demarcus promised he was fine, but Isiah seemed out of sorts as well, so he asked to stay on the couch for a bit even if it was with Colton. I fully understood, and Jamie and I weren't going to be upstairs doing anything naughty with two of the other men I'd been intimate with in the house.

And when I had to be at the bakery in a few hours even.

My life was seriously weird.

I woke when I needed to and kissed a sleeping Jamie goodbye. I used my power to clean up and change before appearing in my apartment. I talked to everyone about the decision to have the bakery pickup orders only for Sundays and Mondays, and everyone was ridiculously relieved. Apparently, things had gotten worse on Sundays since the café had reopened.

I made sure to pay attention… And I didn't like what I found.

It was beyond bad. There were two different groups that treated my bakery like a playground and didn't even watch their own children. I had to step in and tell them to handle their children and if they destroyed my expensive decorations that they would be replacing them.

And a woman actually yelled at me for having expensive decorations around kids then.

"Ma'am, this is not a playground but a bakery," I reminded her, gesturing to the glass display case and long line. "There's not a kid's corner or even toys for these sorts of shenanigans. Yes, children are welcome here, but your kids have been crashing into customers and causing trouble. Please tell them to stop, and parent your children. My employees aren't day care workers."

She seemed about to blast me again when several people in line voiced their agreement with me. She grabbed her kids and left, but several other groups came in later and acted the same. It was like we were the new place that wasn't busy in the café, but only had a line and it was a good place for moms to let their kids go bananas.

No. Just no. That was a headache for us and a liability later.

And they left a mess in my pretty, freshly reopened café.

So I posted that the bakery would be pickup orders only for Sundays and Mondays going forward and tastings would be after normal closing time Friday nights. That I apologized for any inconvenience, but given the demand to increase available items, it was what was best for my employees and to meet the demands of customers.

Also, that I had been considering closing Mondays as well so I didn't break my staff, but this was the only other solution I could come up with. If there was a problem with our app, people could still come in to order, but there would be no café service on those days and takeout only basically.

I also changed the signs with my power so now it was posted that way.

Done and done.

And I headed home with my vehicle to pick up groceries so I could have a nice meal with my family… But totally forgot that Isiah and Colton were still at my house.

Why were they still there?

The twins shot me a look that obviously it was for the chance to spend time with me. My brothers seemed amused but were clearly going to leave it alone.

I introduced Chen and Dion to everyone. "I apologize for everything being so last-minute. Thank you for coming. We decided to make this a weekly family thing at one in the morning. So I picked up what we needed to grill, and let's just relax, okay?"

"Sounds great, Aunt," Dion quickly said, understanding there was some tension he didn't understand.

"You don't have a grill, Mom," Mary chuckled, pulling out her tablet. "I'll find something for the space.

"Thank you, love. There's more in my SUV. I bought a lot."

"On it," Kary and Jamie said together.

I smiled. This was exactly what I wanted. Nice and relaxing after a rough night… Even if they teased me for basically buying only meat.

I could make the rest with my power, and I did. The meat always tasted weird when it was done with my magic.