Chapter Seven

L ast night was the worst night of my life. I have lost brothers in the past, but it hurts a little more knowing it was someone you thought was so invincible.

All night I held Kaitlyn to my side, only letting her up when Kolby woke up for a feeding. She slept peacefully next to me as I stayed awake. I was restless. Unable to turn my mind off.

Who would have done this? It makes me wonder where Fend is. The prospect said he hadn't been around in a while. Rogue had said not to trust anyone. That it was an inside job.

Could Fend be the one who turned on my father?

It's almost inconceivable. Fend has been my father's best friend longer than I've been alive. Then again, I have seen people do a lot of stupid shit for less. Did they have a falling out? Could my father have fucked with a girl he fancied?

It could be anything.

As soon as the sun rose, I was ready to rise with it, but one thing stopped me.

The gorgeous mother of my child is lying in my arms. I've been dreaming of having her here for weeks. Months even.

I finally got her here, but at what cost.

The club will be in shambles until they vote a new president in. Until that happens, I need to keep a close eye on things.

"Your thinking is going to wake Kolby up," her raspy voice says from under my chin.

"I've been quiet about it," I joke.

"How are you feeling this morning?" she asks.

"Determined. Rogue knew the life he got into. I hate that he's gone, especially knowing he was reaching out for help, but I can't dwell on that. I need to focus on fixing what's broken in the club and figuring out who did this," I admit to her.

"I'm here for you. You know that, right?" she whispers.

I press a kiss to the top of her head. "You and Kolby are what are going to get me through this. I should shower."

I disentangle myself from her as I get out of bed and head toward the bathroom. Part of me wishes she would have called me out for being short with her, but the other part is glad she seems to understand me. I need some space to think. To figure out what comes next.

By the time I'm done with the shower, Kaitlyn has Kolby in his playpen while she cooks breakfast.

"I made you and Fang some breakfast sandwiches. What's on the agenda for today?" she asks.

"I need to go see my mom. She has no clue about my father. I should've went last night, but I needed to be here."

I don't add that I needed to be with her.

She nods as if she understood my meaning anyway. "Do you want me to go with you?"

The fact that she even asks means the world to me. I've told her about my mother before. Back when we were just a fling. She knows how much energy that woman sucks out of me.

"Thank you. It's best if I go by myself. Besides, she hasn't made the effort to come meet Kolby, so I don't want to take Kolby there," I say honestly.

She nods. "Okay. Let me know if you need me."

I move toward her, kissing her forehead. "Thank you."

She hands me two bags, now filled with the breakfast sandwiches she spoke of. I walk out through the garage, finding Fang gearing up for the day.

"I'm going to see my mom. Keep an eye on them for me. Especially until we find out what's going on," I tell him.

"Of course."

I hand him the bag, almost breaking into a smile at how happy he looks.

Leaving him inside, I head out to my bike.The ride to my mother's is about forty minutes. She chooses to live far outside the city in the middle of nowhere.

When I pull up, I'm not surprised to see her old beater in the front yard. It's the only thing she won't get rid of because she needs it to get more drugs.

Opening the front door, I call out for her. "Mom? It's Colt."

"In here!" she yells, sounding sober.

When I make it to the kitchen, I'm surprised to find her dressed and seemingly clean.

"Hey, Mom. What's going on?" I ask, looking her over.

"Nothing. What are you doing out here? Don't you have a family to take care of?" she asks, sounding a little nervous.

Swallowing hard, I gesture to the chair. "Have a seat, Mom."

She shakes her head, tears in her eyes. "It's okay. He told me it was coming. Your father's dead, isn't he?"

"He told you what?"

"He said that he thought his life was in danger and that if he died, you would be coming to see me. How did he pass?" she asks, finally taking a seat.

I sit across from her. "He was murdered."

Her hand flies to her mouth. "Oh god."

"Yeah. I'm going to find out who did it, though."

She nods as tears stream down her face. "He told me to stay out here and stay out of trouble. It's why I haven't been to see the baby. He said it was safer for me here."

"Is that why you are sober too?" I ask.

She nods. "I know I wasn't always the best mother, but your father never asked me for anything, so when he asked for this, I listened."

"Well, whatever he was into, it wasn't good. Fend is missing. Do you think Fend could have killed him?" I ask.

She shakes her head no. "Fend? No way. They were thick as thieves. They loved each other."

"Who else could it be?"

"I don't know much about the club anymore, but your father did leave you something. Let me go get it."

She gets up, leaving the room. Minutes later, she comes back with a folder.

"He said that everything that he knew would be in this folder. He dropped it off several days ago and said to give it to you when you came looking for it."

"Did you look inside?" I ask.

She shakes her head. "Your father said not to."

I nod, opening it. I pull it out and glance at it. I realize then that this shit is a lot more convoluted than we thought it was. This is way more than a simple betrayal. This is going to affect the politics in this entire area.

Even the Noche Oscuras.

My baby mama's family.

Fuck.

I pull into a parking spot and shut the car off. My phone vibrates in the cupholder, and I read the text.

Dad: Where are you?

Me: Just pulled up. I'll be in in a minute.

I back out of Dad's text thread and open the one between Colt and me.

Me: I made it to the restaurant.

Colt: Okay, let me know when you are on your way home.

I roll my eyes. "Last I checked, I was an adult who didn't have to report their every move," I mutter to myself.

A pang of guilt hits me. I know Colt isn't asking me to report my every move because he's controlling, but because he's worried. His father was just murdered, and shit is hitting the fan in his world.

I know Fang has been following me at a distance. They are trying to give me my independence without leaving me vulnerable.

Yet, it still grates on my nerves. It reminds me of all the times my father did the same thing. It never mattered if I was a teen or an adult, he always had one of his guys on me. Honestly, I'm surprised he hasn't since Colt got here. I'd say it's because he trusts Colt, but that would be a lie.

More likely, his guy is hanging even further back and out of sight. I'm sure Colt has a tail too. My father would never leave my safety to someone else.

Sighing, I text him back. It's a small concession to make for his peace of mind.

Me: Will do.

I drop my phone into my bag and pull down the visor. I run my hand through my hair and make sure it looks okay before getting out of the car. I go to the back seat and pull Kolby's car seat out of the base.

"Here, let me take him."

I startle as I look over my shoulder to see my dad.

"You scared me." I look up and smile. "I told you I would be right in."

"I was just excited to see you." Dad winks as he takes Kolby's car seat from me.

I roll my eyes as he pulls me in for a one-armed hug.

"How are you doing, sweetheart?" he asks as I lock up the car and we start moving toward the restaurant.

"I'm good. How have you been?"

He shoots me a smile. "Busy, you know how it is."

"I'm not surprised," I quip, making him laugh as he opens the door for the restaurant.

The hostess looks up with a friendly smile. "Hi, just the three of you today?"

"Yes, and if we could get a booth, that would be great," I tell her.

"Of course, follow me."

We follow her through to the back of the restaurant.

"I can take him," I tell my dad as we come to a stop next to the table.

He ignores me and slides Kolby's car seat into the booth and then sits down.

"Your server will be over to help you in a minute," the hostess says with humor in her voice as I sit down.

Sure enough, the server passes the hostess and comes right to us.

"Good afternoon. What could I get you guys to drink?"

"Water for me with a lemon, please."

"I'll take a Coke," Dad says over his shoulder as he removes Kolby from his car seat.

"Of course, I'll get those right to you guys. In the meantime, here are some chips and salsa for you to enjoy," the server says before she bounces away.

Gently, I kick my dad under the table. "You could have said please."

He rolls his eyes. "The please was implied. Now tell me, how are things going with this little fella?"

"Great, honestly. He's a dream baby. Before he was born, I read so many horror stories about babies waking up every hour, having colic, and who knows what else, and then he was born and showed me that I never had anything to worry about."

"You've always had a flair for overthinking."

"Thanks for the reminder," I deadpan, making him chuckle.

After a moment, he clears his throat. "And Colt?"

I groan as I take a bite of a chip. "Not you too."

"Hey, I'm not asking how your mother would. I'm asking because this is the first time you've ever lived with a man, let alone one you don't know very well. I also don't know him well, but I know his father. I want to be sure my little girl is being taken care of."

"I know him well enough to make a baby with him." I wink.

Dad groans, making me laugh. "I like to believe Kolby was created out of immaculate conception. Don't ruin it for me, otherwise I might have to hunt Colt down and castrate him."

"How does it feel to be delusional?"

"It's a fun place. Ten out of ten recommend."

The server drops off our drinks and takes our order. Thankfully, we've been here so many times that we don't need to look at the menu.

Dad waits for her to walk away before picking up the conversation. "Seriously, though, how is it going?"

"It's good, Dad. Colt spoils us both rotten, and we get along really well. Honestly, I can't imagine doing this without him, and I think you would like him if you got to know him. I know he's not part of your club, but he's a good man."

"That's good, and maybe we could have dinner together."

"I'd like that."

"I might regret this, but what made you choose him anyway?" he asks.

I think back to teenage Colt. He looked so hot with his leather jacket and bad boy attitude. I always had a crush on him. The boys in my dad's club were gross and did nasty things like talk about jacking off and shit. I built up an image of Colt in my head, though. He wouldn't talk about that stuff. No, he would talk about deeper things.

I guess I made him into what I wanted him to be, but I never dared cross the line.

Then, years later, I saw him in that bar. He looked exactly the same except older and rougher. That only made me hotter for him. I decided that I needed to fulfill that little fantasy I had about him.

I can't tell my father that, though. He would have a heart attack. So I decide to go to something along the lines of the truth, but prettier.

"I had a crush on him when we were teens. I never spoke to him and would never dare to, but I liked how he looked and the way I heard others talk about him. So when I saw him in a bar all those months ago, I decided to strike up a conversation with him. Really, it was supposed to end there, but the more I talked to him, the more I liked him. To this day, I learn moreabout him that I like. I don't know why it's him, it just is."

I wait for my dad's response. I know he won't like what I just said. I'm sure he never wanted to imagine me growing up and finding a boyfriend, and here I am admitting I basically wanted a one-night stand with my high school crush and somehow ended up tied to the man for eighteen years.

He looks at me thoughtfully before he asks, "What's the plan?"

"What do you mean?" I swallow hard, not liking where this is going.

"Is he staying around? Joining the club here? I would be willing to put it to our club to take him as a transfer."

My stomach rolls at the mention of Colt's MC. Nothing is off-limits with my dad. He's always been the one I've confided in, the one I've told everything to. When we are alone together, we gossip like teenage girls. So normally, I would tell him all about what I know about the rival MC, but it feels wrong now.

I can't do that to Colt.

"He's staying for now, but we haven't really talked about it too much. I'll let him know that you offered, but you can't be mad if he turns you down."

Dad hums his disapproval as he adjusts a sleeping Kolby in his arms. "I know you're an adult and that you can make your own decisions, but I don't want you going anywhere. You need help with this little one. I don't like that idea of you being far away with people you don't know when you have a whole club here to support you."

That's the crux of it. Here, I have everything. My father will support me until the end of time, unconditionally. My mother, even with her faults, would help with Kolby anytime I needed. Then I have all the men in the club, whom I call uncles, that I grew up with. They would spoil the hell out of Kolby and help me raise him. Even the women of the club have always been good to me.A whole support system built in that would come running if I called. It's the reason I'm scared to leave. If Colt asked me right now to go home with him, I'm not sure my answer would be yes.

Then where does that leave us?

"I know you want me here. I don't like the idea of leaving any more than you do, but we haven't made any decisions yet. When we do, I need you to respect it. Let's change the subject. How are things at the club?"

Dad raises a brow. "You know we don't talk about that."

"You know what I meant." I roll my eyes.

A look crosses his face, but I don't know what to make of it. "The club is fine. Nothing for you to worry about."

"Okay," I say, letting it drop.

If there was anything I needed to be aware of, he would tell me. At least, I hoped he would.

Could Colt being in my house change how my father acts toward me? Does he already see me as a betrayal?

"We're going to have a family night soon. Are you going to come and bring this little guy? Introduce him to everyone?"

I shrug. "I don't know. I'd have to talk to Colt."

"You are Kolby's mother. You don't need to get his permission to bring my grandson to a club gathering. He's a legacy."

"Dad…" I warn.

"I'm just saying he has a spot in my club."

"He's a legacy of Lotus too, Dad."

"I know, but can't an old man hope that he chooses the one he's part of?"

"All of this is giving me a headache. Can we talk about something else? Anything else?"

"Sure…"

I tune him out as he starts to talk about the modifications he is making to his bike. Usually I want to hear all about it, but today my mind is elsewhere. He brought up a lot of good points that have my head swirling.

Part of me hopes that when the time comes, Kolby won't pick a club at all, but even I know that the chances of that happening are slim.

The club life is in his veins, whether I like it or not.