13. Carter

Something is going on in Sam’s head. I’m trying not to let my anxiety run straight toward the negative, but that’s always easier said than done. He’s been extra quiet since we sat down to eat. While he’s participated in the conversation, he’s not going into any great detail with his responses to my questions like he did the other night.

Is it acceptable to ask what’s going on? I’m not sure I can continue ignoring his weird behavior, even if it’s not okay to ask.

I scoot my plate away and reach out to grab his hand.

He looks up at me and gives me a warm smile. Maybe it doesn’t have to do with me.

“Are you happy?”

His question seems to come out of the blue. “Uh, yeah. I would consider myself happy. Why?”

“I just… You… What I mean is… Hmm.”

He looks so cute as he stutters through his thoughts. I can’t say I’m not confused, though. I keep ahold of his hand, needing him to know I’m with him regardless of not understanding where this is going.

Finally, he pierces me with an intensity in his eyes. “I was thinking about how I have a good life, you know? I can’t really complain because I have everything I could need, but when I’m with you… it’s like something clicks into place. I don’t know. I’m probably not making any sense. Just ignore me.”

He starts to get up to clear his plate, but I stop him. “Wait a minute. I think I know what you’re talking about.”

When he sits back down, I attempt to explain how I’ve been feeling since we met a couple of weeks ago. “I’ve always struggled with anxiety. There’s a constant stream of thoughts going through my head that tells me I’m not good enough in every aspect of my life. It’s why I enjoy cooking. My brain can’t dispute the fact that I can make a damn good meal. Being with you feels similar to when I cook. The noise fades away until the only thing I think about is you.”

Sam grabs my arm and pulls me onto his lap. I settle my legs on either side of the chair so I’m straddling his hips. When his arms wrap around my back to bring me closer, I bury my nose in his neck. Everything in my body melts into his embrace. It’s comforting to know I’m not alone in the intensity of my feelings for Sam.

“How is it possible to feel like this when we’ve only hung out a few times?” I ask without moving from my hiding spot on his shoulder.

Sam’s hands run up and down my back in soothing circles. “Experience. We’ve both dated enough to know the signs of a real connection. This, what we’re starting here, is going to be important, Carter. You’re going to be important to me. I swear to you now that I’ll give you everything I have to make this work.”

I sit up, needing to look him in the eyes when I respond. “I give you the same promise, Sam. You’ll have me until you no longer want me.”

“I’m not sure that day will ever come.” He smiles as he leans in to kiss me, sealing our commitment to each other. His tongue sneaks out to lick my bottom lip in a tantalizing caress. I open to him, giving him entry into not only my heart but my body, as well.

My shorts are growing too tight to be comfortable, and while I have no desire to create any amount of space between us, I need more room to do what I want with him.

I wiggle off his lap, keeping my lips fused to his until I have to break the connection. Then I grab his hands and lead him into the living room, where I promptly push him down onto the couch. He lands with an oof and then begins to laugh.

I find myself grinning as I climb on top of him. “I’ve never laughed this much with someone I’m dating. I’m always too busy worrying about saying the wrong thing. You make me want to be myself no matter what we’re doing.”

“I think that’s the best compliment anyone’s ever given me.”

I press my lips against his to keep from getting too emotional. The kiss turns dirty in minutes, our tongues dueling for dominance. I press my hard length into his hip. It only teases me more, rather than providing any sense of relief.

Sam’s hands slide down my back and into the waistband of my shorts. When he grabs my ass and grinds his erection into me, I lose all sense of control I thought I had. I frantically pull at my clothes, only to freeze in place when Sam begins to take his clothes off, as well.

“You’re fucking gorgeous,” I blurt and promptly blush until my face is as bright as a tomato.

Sam’s eyes rove over my bare chest. “You’re one to talk.” He sits up and runs his tongue from my unbuttoned shorts to my chest.

“Fuck,” I whisper.

Sam’s grin is full of male pride. “Just getting you back from the other night.”

He digs his fingers into the elastic of my underwear to pull them off, along with my shorts. My cock juts out from my body, practically smacking Sam in the face. It’d be funny if I wasn’t so turned on.

Then his mouth wraps around my head, and I’m lost. The noises that fall from me are embarrassingly needy.

“You’re too good. I… Sam,” I whine.

He laughs when he pulls off me, his mouth moving down to my balls. One hand strokes my length while his fingers begin to wander, and I gasp when he teases my hole.

“Ohhh, God.”

“Can I have you?” Sam asks, his lips tickling the skin on my hip.

“Mmmmm.”

“Was that a yes or a no?” Sam laughs.

“Yes. A most emphatic yes.”

Sam stands from the couch to drop his shorts, and I can’t help myself. He’s so beautiful, he deserves to be worshipped. I take him into my mouth, laving at him until he’s breathing hard.

“Stop. I want to be inside you when I come.”

I shiver. “Jesus.”

Suddenly, my front door opens. “Is there any chance you’ve got some leftovers—Oh, fuck!”

Sam drops to the floor while I scramble for my underwear. I slip them on and spin to face my brother. “What the hell are you doing here, Nolan?” I yell.

“Dude, I’m so sorry. I texted you, but I’m guessing you didn’t get it. I’m just gonna go now. Good to see you, Sam. Well… not see you, but you know… Okay, byeeeee!” The door slams behind him, and I hang my head.

“So that’s what it’s like to have nosy siblings,” Sam muses. He’s sitting on my couch with a blanket across his lap and looking as relaxed as can be, as if my brother didn’t just interrupt us being intimate.

A laugh falls from my chest as the absurdity of the situation hits me. I sit down next to him on the couch and drop my head on his shoulder. “I’m so sorry. As you can see, Nolan has a tendency to drop by unannounced.” A thought pops into my head. “How did he not notice your car in my driveway?”

“I parked on the street. I wasn’t sure which side you parked on, and I didn’t want to be in the way in case my bad luck at cooking any meal resulted in us needing to get takeout.”

That makes me laugh harder, and Sam joins me in the giggles.

When we get a hold of ourselves, I adjust my head to see his face. “I’m sorry my brother saw you naked.”

I meant for the apology to be sincere, but I’m not sure how I could’ve said that without making us both start laughing again.

“Do you want to watch a movie or something now that the moment has passed?” I ask.

“Oh, I can assure you, the moment has not passed.” Sam lifts the blanket to show me he’s still hard.

“Damn.” I bite my bottom lip. I stand from the couch and hold my hand out. “Let’s go to my bedroom. All the important stuff is in there anyway.”

We walk down the hallway to my room. Sam takes in my space while I grab the lube and a couple of condoms from my bedside table. Potentially optimistic, but the last time we did this, he cut my rebound time in half.

When I turn around, I find him watching me. My face flushes a little at his inspection. He’s standing in the middle of my bedroom naked, yet I’m the one who feels exposed.

“Come here,” he says softly.

I go to him without a thought. He cups my face and kisses me reverently. How can he make me feel so cherished with only a kiss?

He walks me back to my bed and slowly presses me into the mattress while we kiss. His hands roam my body as if he’s mapping every inch of my skin. Then his fingers are pulling my briefs down my legs until I’m as bare to him physically as I am emotionally.

He moves down my body, leaving open-mouthed kisses as he goes until I’m strung tighter than a bow. Then he’s swallowing my cock, and I gasp at the sensation.

The click of the lube cap is quickly followed by probing fingers. I lift my legs to give him more room and am quickly rewarded with the wonderful dichotomy of pleasure and pain.

“Sam, you have to stop.”

He freezes and lifts his head. “I’m sorry, Carter. What do you need?”

“No, no. I just was about to come. I didn’t mean I wanted to stop altogether.”

His shoulders drop, and his wide grin makes his hazel eyes sparkle. “But isn’t that our goal?”

“I want you inside me first.”

“Your wish is my command.” He winks. His fingers slide out of me, and he quickly suits up. Then the head of his wide cock is pressing against me.

A little whimper escapes when the pressure of his entry becomes overwhelming.

“Take a deep breath, baby,” he says.

I exhale, allowing him to slip past the tight ring of muscles. We both groan the moment he slides all the way into me.

“Fuck, you’re tight,” Sam moans. He stays still to give us both a moment to adjust.

“Please, I need you to move.” Desperation laces my voice. There’s so much pressure I think I might explode the second he thrusts inside me again.

“I’ve got you.” He slowly pulls out, then pushes back in with one smooth stroke.

My breathing stutters. His hips keep up the gentle glide, moving in and out of me with deep strokes.

“More. Harder. Please.” Full sentences are too much for my scrambled brain. They don’t seem to be necessary. Sam sits up and grabs my hips, thrusting into me until our bodies are slapping together. His cock hits me exactly where I need, and my brain blips out.

My orgasm crests the peak of no return. “Yes, yes, yes!” I shout as I grab hold of myself, matching his rhythm.

Cum shoots out of me, each rope landing on my abs and chest.

“Goddamn,” Sam groans as his thrusts get choppy until he shouts through his release. He collapses onto my heaving chest despite the mess. We both take a moment to catch our breaths. I trace his spine with my fingertips to help bring us down from the high.

Sam lifts his head and presses his lips against mine in a sweet kiss. “You’re incredible. That was incredible.”

“Agreed.” I want to ask him to stay, but I might cry if he says no.

“Can I stay? Please?” His hesitance eases some of my worry, and I smile up at him.

“I was trying to figure out the best way to ask. I’d love for you to stay.”

“Good, because I’m not quite finished with you yet.”