40. Lyla

"Hey, butterfly." Sage's voice filters through the fog.

White noise I've been swimming in. Endless static.

I blink my eyes open, and it takes a moment for me to focus. Everything is white—so white.

First, I think I see Sage standing over me, but then another face draws my attention beside him.

Ellie.

Her dark hair is braided like it always was, and she smiles so big her face splits open with sunshine. A white light so bright I can't look at it.

"Lyla." She reaches her hand out, but I'm too weak to take it.

"I miss you, Ellie."

And I burn.

From my chest to my bones. Every part of my body aches, and I want to let go.

"Not yet, Lyla." Ellie's voice fades in and out, and I'm not sure what she's talking about. "Not yet."

Her lips don't move with her words, but her voice is echoing around me.

"I love you."

I don't know if she says it, or I do. Ellie smiles, her bright blue eyes shining through the blinding white light. So bold and saturated they're all I see.

A smile so big her face fills with sunshine again. And when I blink at the brightness of it, she fades away.

Sage steps into my line of sight, blocking the beam of sun shining through the window.

"Sage." His name comes out hoarse.

He squeezes my hand. "Take it easy."

Sitting down on the side of my bed, he holds my hand in his lap.

"You tried to leave me again." His thumb brushes over the back of my hand, back and forth.

"Doesn't ever work." The smile hurts my cheeks, but I can't help it because he's real and I'm still here. "You always find me."

"Always will." He lifts my hand and kisses the back of it.

Sage holds my hand on his thigh. His shirt is splattered with blood, and there are dark streaks painting his jacket.

"How long has it been?"

"About twelve hours." He shakes his head. "Your heart stopped, but Doc got it started again."

His eyebrows tense, and his jaw clenches.

"Hey." I rub the back of his hand with my thumb. "I'm okay now, right?"

He nods. "You're stable now, yeah. But fuck."

Sage stands up, running his hands through his hair and pacing the side of my bed.

Wherever we are, it's not a hospital. It's a regular bedroom, so maybe it's a room in the neighborhood.

"Sage."

"You can't do that, Lyla." He leans down so he's caging me between his arms, looking down at me. "I can't lose you like that."

"To be fair, I warned you." I tip my chin up.

Even if it hurts to move—to talk—I can't help antagonizing him.

Sage reaches up and holds my jaw, brushing his thumb over my chin. "You're lucky I love this sassy fucking mouth because you're killing me."

"You love it, huh?" I smile.

He nods, leaning in to kiss my lower lip before grazing his mouth over mine. "I love you, Lyla. I've loved you as long as I can remember."

"So you meant it then? You don't want to take it back now that I'm not dying."

"Never." He plants his lips on mine and kisses me.

He's gentle, which is rare for him, and when he presses a little harder, and I flinch at the pain in my side, he pulls back.

"Do you need me to call Doc?"

"I'm okay." I shake my head. "Where are we?"

"His house."

That explains the amount of medical equipment.

Sage sits down on the bed next to me again, taking my hand in his.

"What about—" I choke on my words for a moment, and I'm not sure if it's the pain or the swell of emotion from everything flooding me at once, but pressure builds behind my eyes. "Where's Kane?"

Sage's eyes hold the answer. One I knew when I asked the question, but I have to hear it anyway. My dad didn't do much for me and Ellie growing up, but he saved my life. I took one bullet, but he stepped in front of me before Helix could hit me with another. I watched him get shot three times as my mind started to fade out.

It's a blur of screams and explosions and blood, but I can still hear the ringing of gunshots above it all.

"He didn't make it," Sage answers, reaching up to brush the tear from my cheek. "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault."

"I brought you there."

"Don't." I grip his hand. "You didn't do this. Helix did."

Defeat wells up in his gaze. "We don't need to talk about this right now. You should rest."

I shake my head. "I need to know what happened. Please tell me."

I'd like to think he pauses for my sake, but when he looks down at my bandaged side, I realize it's probably not any easier for him to relive it.

I died.

"Helix convinced a few of the guys to overthrow the club. They set the bombs around the clubhouse to create a distraction. It looks like his plan was to use that time to take out Kane. With Kane dead, he probably thought Steel would finally give him what he wanted. Obviously, that's not the case."

"Because you killed him?"

Sage's face tenses, and he nods.

It's not the first time Sage has killed for me, and if I asked him his body count, I'm sure he'd tell me. But I don't. It doesn't matter. I trust Sage has never taken a life he didn't feel deserved to be taken.

Maybe it's because I'm a biker's daughter at heart, whether I've embraced that or not, but I accept that he does what he needs to protect me and the club.

A knock comes at the door, and we look up to see Blaze standing in the doorway.

"Welcome back." He smiles at me, his gaze sagging with exhaustion. "How you feeling?"

"Like I've been shot."

Blaze laughs, even if Sage glares at my joke. Blaze's cut is stained in blood, but he wears it proudly, the same way Sage hasn't changed either.

"Can I get a second?" Blaze asks Sage.

Sage looks at me, and I pat his hand. "I'm okay."

"No." He shakes his head. "Whatever you need to say to me you can say to Lyla."

Blaze walks in, crossing his arms over his chest and facing the bed. "You sure?"

He nods.

"All right." Blaze scratches his head and looks Sage over. "Steel's headed back to Vegas. He needs to put everyone's loyalty in check and make sure there aren't any straggling traitors. But there's still a lot of work to be done."

"Like a ceremony, I assume." Sage glances at Blaze's blood-splattered VP patch. "It's gonna be Prez, right?"

Blaze nods, before glancing at me. It's not his fault my father is dead, and that he's taking the role he's earned with that tragedy, but it doesn't mean he wanted it to happen the way it did.

He looks back at Sage. "Things are chaos around here. Half the council died in the explosion, not to mention the number of members it took out. This mess is worse than when we took down Satan's Reapers. I need people I can trust by my side."

"Tell me you didn't come in here to ask me what I think you're about to."

Blaze steps forward, taking his knife out of his pocket. He flips it open and works at the stitches on his patch, slowly slicing it off his cut. After breaking the final stitch, he tosses the vice-president patch onto the bed.

"Just think about it." Blaze points at it with his knife. "We could build something different. Something like it used to be. Something better than this."

"I'm not even patched."

"You're more of a Twisted King than half the fuckers here. Plus, I trust you. Just"—he tips his knife—"think about it."

Blaze nods at me before turning and leaving the room, and when I look at Sage, he's staring at the patch on the bed.

Picking it up, I trace the letters, remembering when his dad used to wear this title.

"Don't worry, I'm not doing it." Sage takes the patch from my hands and sets it on the table beside the bed.

"Why not?"

"Why not?" he repeats. "Look at you, Lyla. I've almost lost you twice to all this shit. The first time I didn't see you for eight years, and the second time stopped your fucking heart. I'm not doing it again."

"So it's because of me?"

"No." He rakes his hand through his hair. "But it's not who I am."

"But what if it is?" I challenge him. "What if this is exactly who you're meant to be. You heard Blaze, you could make a difference. You could make this place better."

"You don't even want this," he reminds me.

"I know." I pick at my fingernail. "I didn't. But—"

"Don't say it," he cuts me off.

"What?"

"Destiny." He narrows his gaze.

"You're reading my mind now, huh?" I smile.

Sage climbs into the bed beside me and holds me as close as he can without moving me or tugging at any stitches.

"Yeah, guess I am." He plays with my hair.

"Just hear me out." I lace my fingers through his. "I never wanted this because I didn't understand it back then. I didn't know how to be Kane's daughter and still be myself. I didn't know how to move on, but I didn't know how to stay put either. And I used that to push you away over and over again. But the truth is, it doesn't matter what you are or who I am. Because biker, not a biker, here, there—you're where I belong, Sage."

I press my lips together feeling the tears brim in my eyes.

"If this is what you want, don't turn it down because of me. I'm yours, Sage. Now, forever. I'll follow you wherever that leads so long as you keep me."

"Keep you? You're never fucking getting rid of me now." He tips his forehead to plant a kiss on my shoulder. "I told Kane I didn't patch in because once you were gone and my dad was dead, this place wasn't the same. It wasn't family anymore. And that's the truth."

"But…"

He looks up at me, and I can't help but smile.

"But… sitting with you in the neighborhood and standing with you at the clubhouse… you're my home too, Lyla." He brushes the back of his knuckles over my cheek. "If you want to run, we'll run. If you want to stay, we'll stay. Life wasn't fucking worth it without you. I'm not doing it again."

I look into his eyes, and I believe him. If I asked Sage to give it all up, he would. And I think he kind of did. When I left, he went on pause. But that's not what I want for him. I love him beyond my own selfish fears. I see who he is, and he's someone who can bring good back to this place. Someone who can bring healing after all the violence.

A man who cares so much about everyone else, he doesn't leave much for himself.

So like he's done with me, I'll be that strength for him. I'll follow him to the end of this, wherever that leads.

Sage is my destiny.

"What do you want to do?" I ask him, cupping his jaw with my hand. "You kept me safe. Let me do the same. Trust me to be strong enough to be by your side. I can handle it."

"I know you can, butterfly." A smile ghosts his cheeks. "And that's all that matters."

He leans in to kiss me, and the past and present collide. Everything we've been running from hits us full force, and now, I don't mind.

Together we're stronger. We're limitless.