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Chapter 30

Chapter Thirty

Anya

T he next morning, I’m still sore inside from our rough sex. On top of that, my period starts for the first time after my pregnancy. I flinch at the cramps in my belly and the deeper ache in my womb when I get ready for work.

I woke up alone. Saverio must be having his physio session already. Why he needs to do it so early beats me. I guess old habits are hard to break. Maybe he misses his morning jogs and workouts. I don’t know what came over him that made him leave in such a rush after fucking me in the lounge yesterday. That’s not how he is. Normally, he takes care of me first. Livy and I had dinner alone while Saverio locked himself in his study, and when he finally came to bed, I was already asleep.

There’s no time to question him. Having overslept, I’m running late for an appointment with Nicole. While I dress, Livy plays with Claire in the upstairs television room that I’m turning into a playroom. After making a quick smoothie, I drink my liquid breakfast while breastfeeding Claire. Then I leave her with Livy and make it to Manhattan in record time.

“Sorry I’m late,” I say when I’m getting comfortable on the examination chair in Nicole’s consultation room.

“It’s five minutes.” She fits surgical gloves. “Don’t sweat about it. I’m going to do a pelvic exam to check the health of your uterus and cervix, exactly like last time. Take a deep breath and relax your muscles.”

I do as she’s instructed, doing my best to relax even though it’s not easy when I’m still raw from wild sex and every touch is uncomfortable.

“How are things at home?” she asks, her face scrunched up in concentration as she pushes a flat hand on my abdomen.

“Fine.”

“Are you still working crazy hours?”

I smile. “Same as you.”

She scoffs. “We should do a ladies’ night sometime soon again. It was fun, minus the hangover the next day.”

That makes me laugh.

She straightens and discards the gloves. “Everything looks fine. I’m going to do an ultrasound to get an exact read on the measurements, and then we’re done.”

“Do you want to come over for a barbecue this weekend?” I ask while she washes her hands at the basin before fitting a new pair of gloves.

She returns to squeeze a dollop of gel on my stomach. “Would love to.” Her smile is teasing. “Does Sav know he’s invited?”

“Saverio is slowly but surely coming around. He’s back at After Dark.”

“I heard.” She drags a transducer over my abdomen while studying the monitor. “You’re good for him. He’s different around you. You definitely have a positive influence.”

I chew my lip, considering that.

She stills. “You know that, right? The two of you were made for each other.”

“Yet he keeps on telling me he doesn’t love me.”

She puts away the probe and hands me a few paper towels. “Then why are you still with him?”

Accepting the stash, I wipe my stomach clean. “Because his actions say otherwise.”

“That’s good then. Actions are what matter. If he doesn’t treat you right, I’ll be the first to tell you to dump his grumpy, sexy ass. But I’ve known him for five years now, and I’ve seen how he was before.”

She takes a deep breath. “When I first met you, I questioned his motives for being with you. I knew how badly he wanted a child, and let’s just say I thought his agenda for dating you weren’t all that clearcut.”

“You’re right.” Admitting it hurts, but I try not to show it. “Saverio has always been with me for the wrong reasons.”

“Look, Anya, I’m going to say this straight out because I don’t like to mince my words. He’s never obsessed about anything like he’s obsessing over you. The way he behaves with you is about more than simply getting Claire in the package deal. He’s sweet with you, and that man doesn’t do sweet. He’s much more agreeable in general. He actually makes an effort to get along with people, and that says a lot because Sav never makes an effort for anyone unless it serves his own agenda.”

“That’s exactly what he told me. He said he only takes care of me and Claire for selfish reasons.”

“The way he takes care of you goes beyond selfish. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have sacrificed his life to save you.”

“Yeah.” I pull down the hospital gown, discard the sheet covering my legs, and sit up. “That was my argument too.”

She pats my shoulder. “Give it time. Both of you have just been through a rough patch, and that’s putting it lightly.”

My smile is half-hearted. “Thanks.”

She turns serious. “Don’t give up on him. Sav is loyal to the people he cares about, and there aren’t many. I thought he’d lose his mind when Rachele left him, but I’m afraid it’ll truly be the end of him if you walk away.”

My shoulders heave with the sigh I blow out. “I’m not going anywhere. No matter what he says, I’m staying.”

“You won’t be sorry. Sav will do his best to make you happy. That’s just who he is.”

I nod even though a bruise settles in my chest. He may never tell me the words I want to hear, but he doesn’t need to say that he loves me to make me happy. A part of him still belongs to Rachele. I understand that. I can live with that. I can love enough for both of us. I have to. We’re in this now, and the only way I’ll survive—both physically and emotionally—is if we stick together.

Nicole puts up a bright smile. “As far as your exam goes, you’re as good as new. Your period is right on time too, twelve weeks after the birth to be exact, which is around the earlier date for moms who breastfeed exclusively. It may be a bit irregular at first, but your cycle should settle into your normal pattern soon. Are you considering a contraceptive yet?”

“You know Saverio’s diagnosis. If we don’t need one, I don’t see the point.”

She removes her surgical gloves and discards them in the trash can. “Unless anything develops before, I don’t need to see you until your annual checkup.”

I get off the chair and go to the changing room. “Let me know when you’re available for that barbecue.” While dressing, I call through the door, “We’ll surprise Saverio.”

“Oh dear. Saverio hates surprises.” When I step out, dressed, she adds with an evil smile, “I can’t wait to see his face.”

I follow her outside. “He’ll probably never forgive me.”

“His bad.” She pauses in the reception area. “But let’s do lunch before then. Wednesday afternoon? And bring Livy and that gorgeous baby of yours. I’ll find us a baby friendly restaurant.”

“Sounds good. I’m already looking forward to it.”

The patients waiting in the reception area shoot me dirty looks that I presume are for chatting to Nicole and making them wait longer than they already have. Nicole and I say our goodbyes, and then I settle the bill at the counter before driving to After Dark.

Livy is at the bar, doing a stock take. She seems to be cut out for the job. I find Saverio behind his desk in the office, bouncing Claire on his knee. She can already hold up her head, which makes me ridiculously proud. She sits with her back against his stomach, sucking on her thumb. He has his big arm wrapped around her front to keep her steady while he reads something on his laptop.

The sight is so sweet my heart melts on the spot.

He looks up when I enter, something like caution and concern coming over his features.

“Hi.” I go over to kiss the top of Claire’s head before pressing a kiss on my husband’s lips. “How did it go?”

“Good.” His smile is reserved. “What did Nicole say?”

“Everything looks fine.”

Relief sparks in that strikingly blue eye. “I’m happy to hear that. I’ve been a little too adventurous in the sex department and definitely too rough.”

Tilting my head, I prop a hand on my hip. “I hope that’s not an apology, because I liked what we did, and I’d hate for you to regret it.”

His gaze narrows with dark possession. “Oh, I don’t regret being inside you. I can never regret claiming every hole in your body and making you mine. The only thing I’ll regret is hurting you by going too far.”

I watch him carefully. “Is that what bothered you yesterday?”

A shutter drops in front of his uncovered eye. “I should’ve been more careful.”

“You didn’t do anything I didn’t enjoy, and we didn’t take any risks.”

He splays his fingers over Claire’s tummy, his large hand bigger than her tiny body. “Let’s not discuss this in front of her.”

As if to agree, Claire takes her thumb out of her mouth and makes a gibberish sound.

“Okay,” I say slowly. For some reason, I’m not reassured. “Are you sure you’re all right?”

His expression softens. “I’m good, but it’s not me who deserves the concern.”

“How about us ?” I ask, unable to keep the vulnerability from my voice.

Reaching up, he cups my nape and pulls me down for a kiss.

“We’re good,” he declares in a deep, raspy timbre as he brushes his thumb over the back of my neck in a soothing gesture.

“Okay,” I say again, frowning as I straighten.

Something feels off, but I can’t put my finger on it.

“I got you a decaf latte.” He points at the travel mug waiting on my desk. “Extra-large.”

I blow out a sigh of contentedness. “How did you know what I needed?”

He’s dead serious when he says, “It’s my job to know.”

Despite the hurt that’s like a constant pressure underneath my breastbone, warmth spreads through my ribcage. That hurt has moved in to stay. It’s not going anywhere any time soon, but he also makes me happy when he does these considerate things such as getting my favorite coffee exactly the way I like it.

“Do you want me to take Claire off your hands?” I ask. “I can put her in her playpen.”

“Not yet,” he says, affection creeping into his voice as he looks at her with a soft smile on his lips. “She seems happy here.”

Like me, he’s crazily pleased that she no longer cries when he picks her up. I leave him to enjoy the moment and go downstairs to the bar. Roy is teaching Livy how to operate the POS system the evening shift waitresses use.

When I lean on the bar counter, Roy looks up with a smile. “Hey, boss lady. I hear you have a new name in town.”

“I do?”

“Didn’t you know?” He grins. “Lady Luck.”

“Excuse me?”

He wags his pierced eyebrows. “The talk is that Mr. Bennett gave you the nickname himself, and that’s a mighty honor.”

“It’s ladybug,” Livy says with an eye roll.

“Huh?” Roy turns to her with a scrunched-up face. “What kind of bug?”

I wave a hand. “Never mind. Tell me something, Roy. What will make a bar lose its liquor license?”

He crosses his beefy arms. “Now, that’s the biggest fear of every restaurant and bar that were ever granted a license.”

Yes, nothing is worse than losing a liquor license, because losing it means going out of business.

“You don’t have to worry about After Dark, Lady Luck,” Roy continues. “We know how to keep our noses clean. Our bouncers and bartenders were trained on how to protect our license, which is the number one priority of all the staff members on the floor.”

“But say we were to lose it, what would lead to such a decision?”

Livy rests her elbows on the bar, her blue eyes lighting up with interest.

Roy takes a wide stance. “Serving minors, disorderly conduct, over-serving guests, untrained staff members, and not following the liquor laws for sure.”

I ponder that. It’s pretty much what I figured.

“Does that mean I need training?” Livy asks.

Roy shoots her a smile. “Don’t worry, Liv. You’re serving our lunch hour clients. It never gets out of hand during the daytime, and the guest list is controlled, so it’s quiet. Anyways, the bouncers will throw out any troublemakers before they have time to actually cause damage.”

“She’s got a point,” I say. “How does she become a qualified bartender?”

“She’s got to do a SmartServe program and get a bartending license. It’s easy enough doing it as an on-premises serving course.”

“Arrange it.” I nod at Livy. “Rather safe than sorry.”

“Yes, ma’am, Lady Luck.” Roy salutes me. “Anything else?”

“I want you to hire a few men to cause trouble at Obsidian—get into bar brawls and disrupt the peace, that kind of thing. Make sure they cause enough havoc inside and outside to make the neighborhood very unhappy.”

Understanding widens his eyes. “You want them to lose their license.”

“Brilliant,” Livy mumbles, an evil smile curving her lips.

“I know a few guys who, for the right money, won’t mind spending a night in a holding cell.” He scratches his jaw. “If it comes to that of course. The cops on our beat will probably let them off the hook with a warning.”

“Good.” I straighten. “Make sure they keep their mouths shut. We don’t want anyone to know they were paid to make trouble.”

“Sure thing, Lady Luck.”

“I’m not Lady Luck.”

“Yes, you are,” Dante says, coming toward us with a grin that splits his face. “Sorry, Lady Luck. I’m afraid it’s too late to undo it. Once a person has earned a mobster name, it sticks.”

“I’m not a—” I was going to say mobster, but I’m as knee-deep in this business as anyone else here. “Ugh.” Turning back toward the office, I say, “Forget it.”

“It’s an honor,” he calls after me.

I don’t reply. I’m still upset with him for going behind my back to tell my husband I brought in money instead of giving me a chance to do so myself.

“Anya,” he says, running to catch up with me.

Ignoring him, I make my way up the stairs, but he cuts me off on the gallery.

Sighing, I stop. “What is it, Dante?”

“You’re angry with me.”

“No shit, Sherlock.”

“You know I had to do it.”

“I would’ve told Saverio in my own time and my own way.”

“Would you?” He studies me with a tilted head. “You said the same about the loan and Bennett, yet you never did. You took a dangerous fucking bet without telling anyone.” He waves a hand toward the bar downstairs. “Well, except for Livy, who would’ve done what exactly to protect you if necessary?”

“Livy knows how to shoot.”

“That’s not the point.”

“Then what is?” I ask, losing my patience, especially as Claire’s crying reaches me from the office.

“The point is that Saverio would’ve found out eventually, and if he didn’t hear it from you or me, how do you expect him to trust either of us?”

Fine. It makes sense. “You’re right.”

When I make to move around him, he blocks my way.

I raise my arms. “What?”

“I don’t want bad blood between us.”

“I understand why you did it. No hard feelings.”

He searches my face. “Do you mean that?”

“Yes,” I say, my tone laced with frustration. “Now let me pass. My daughter is hungry, and you’re standing in the way of her only food source.”

“Sorry.”

His flustered grin is disarming. I can see why women find him irresistible. Dante is a curious mixture of danger and charm.

He steps aside. “I’ll never be as cruel as getting in the way of my goddaughter’s meal.”

“I’ll tell her that,” I say over my shoulder as I carry on down the hallway.

“You do that, Lady Luck.”

Gritting my teeth, I don’t reply. He’s just baiting me to get a reaction.

A few men hanging out on the gallery nod in greeting as I pass, their respectful, “Morning, Lady Luck,” following me to the office.

Saverio stands by the window, rocking Claire in his arms when I walk inside. Smiling down at her, he says, “See? I told you. Mommy is right here, angel.”

I go over, wanting to wrap both of them up in my arms.

Gently, Saverio hands her to me. “She already finished the bottle Livy packed this morning. It seems it wasn’t enough.”

I sit down behind my desk and throw a cotton feeding blanket over my shoulder. I’ve barely adjusted my blouse before Claire latches on to my breast.

Chuckling, I caress her head. “Such an impatient little girl.”

“Mm.” Saverio perches on the edge of the desk, watching us with pride and an odd dearness I haven’t seen on his face before. “Just like her mother.”

“I’m not impatient,” I exclaim.

His smile is wicked. “It depends on the situation.”

Dante sticks his head around the door. “Do you have a minute, Sav?”

“Not now,” Saverio says, the words a warning that rumbles in his chest. “Anya is breastfeeding, and if you catch a glimpse of my wife naked, you know I have to kill you.”

“Later, then,” Dante says, quickly retreating. “It’s about a new supplier, and your Lady Luck should be present. She can give us her take on their terms.”

I groan when he closes the door. “They’re all calling me that now.”

“I heard,” Saverio drawls. He leans closer, stealing a kiss before breathing over my lips, “Lady Luck.”

“It’s Benson’s fault. He started it with his ladybug that someone mistakenly took for Lady Luck, and now everyone has gotten it into their heads that I’m lucky.”

Saverio holds my gaze in that intense way that makes heat bloom under my skin. “It’s an honor.”

“Mm. That’s what Roy and Dante said. So, what’s your nickname? How come I’ve never heard it?”

A soft smile plays on his face as he takes me in, as if the sight in front of him pleases him immensely. “I haven’t deserved that honor yet.”

“You’re joking.”

“Not at all. To the men, I’m simply Sav.”

“Mr. De Luca, you mean. Only Dante calls you Sav.”

“It depends on how close we are.”

Yep. Like Nicole said, he’s not close to many people.

“I guess it’s official then.” I’m half frightened, half resigned. “I’m a proper mobster.”

Saverio cups my cheek. “No, tesoro , you’re not a mobster.” The pride and affection of earlier is nothing compared to the possessiveness that gleams darkly in his gaze now. “You, my love, are a queen.” He stares at me as if I’m a rare and precious object. “And a dangerous one at that.”

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