Chapter eighteen

I’m so fucking lucky that I have Lexi. I accepted years ago that I have shitty parents and they would never change. Being confronted with that still hurts. Not a lot, but it’s there. Having Lexi stand beside me yesterday while my dad spewed all that crap, quietly lending me his strength, meant everything to me.

There is no way I’m letting go of him.

I stare at Lexi sitting at my desk wearing my sweats and an old T-shirt, typing away at his laptop to finish an assignment, and my dick thickens. That man is covered in me.

I can never get enough of him. It was only an hour ago that I had my dick in his throat, choking him, making his eyes weep. Yeah, I need him again now. I crawl across my king-size bed and pull the desk chair back, spinning him around. His beautiful blue eyes are full of amusement.

“Do you need something, Ryder?”

“Yeah, you to make me cum. I’m horny.” I give him my most charming smile.

He throws his head back and laughs. “You’re always horny.”

“Yeah, well, you’re always around.” Shit, that makes him frown.

“Do you not want to spend as much time with me?”

“No, no, no, I always want you around.” I run my hand through his hair, the tension leaving him. I want him around too much. Moving in together when you’re only halfway through junior year of college is probably too soon. Right? Right!

“I’ve got an idea for a great game.” I change the subject before I do or say something wrong.

“Whatcha got?” I see the competitive spark light up his face.

“I think we should see who has the bigger dick.” I’m so fucking smart. “It’s a good idea. Let’s see who has the biggest cock in length and girth.”

“What does the winner get?” He folds his arms, making the muscles in his biceps strain. Fuck, that’s hot.

Focus, Ryder

“Okay, the winner gets a blowjob.”

Lexi laughs, “We get blowjobs all the time anyway.”

“Yes, but this will be a special blowjob.”

“Now I’m intrigued. What makes this blowjob special?”

“Weeeeeell,” I say, elongating the word as I try to think of something. What could it be? His blowjobs really are out of this world already.

An idea suddenly comes to me.

“Now, hear me out. I was on this mom forum—” I start before he interrupts me.

“Wait, why were you on a parenting forum?” His eyebrows knit together.

“It was for my business class. We were doing an assignment on how much the baby and toddler industry is worth. I had to look some things up, and this public forum came up. There were a bunch of moms talking about how they like to keep things interesting with their husbands, and one said she puts pop rocks in her mouth and then goes down on him.”

“That sounds dangerous.”

“Imagine it, Lexi.”

“Yeah, I am. That’s why I said it sounds dangerous.”

“It’s not dangerous.”

“What if one of the rocks gets inside my dick and explodes?”

“That’s not going to happen.” I don’t think. “I can go first, so you put the pop rocks in your mouth to explode and then swallow my dick.”

He smirks at me. “You win either way.”

I lean into him so I’m a breath away from his mouth. “Are you telling me you don’t fucking love it when my dick is in your mouth? That the weight of my hard cock, heavy on your tongue, isn’t a prize? I see you, Lexi. I know how much you crave me inside you. How addicted you are to my taste.”

I pull back, and his eyes are dark with lust. His cock tents his sweats, and there is a small dark patch where his precum stains the fabric.

“Drop your pants,” he growls, pushing out of the desk chair and standing.

I’m not wearing underwear, only sweats, so taking them off leaves me completely naked. Lexi does the same, but I take off his T-shirt. It’s only fair that we’re naked together.

We hold our hard cocks next to each other, the tip of his nestling in my pubes.

“Yours is definitely longer, but I think mine is thicker. There’s only one way to find out for real,” I tell him seriously.

“Oh yeah? And how’s that?”

I just smile and pull him down on the bed on top of me. Actually, this won’t get me what I want. I roll us so I’m on top of Lexi. I kiss up his body over his big thick thighs. More kisses to his groin and that sexy little treasure trail. His belly button, his abs, his nipples, his stubbled jaw.

I taste them all.

He’s panting underneath me. And that is when I finally take his mouth. I can’t help but rut against him. My dick slides next to his, and it’s the best feeling ever.

He pulls back from the kiss. “I want to know who wins the competition.”

“We both do, baby.” I bend and kiss the mushroom head of his cock before going to my nightstand and grabbing some lube. Lexi places his hands on my hips as I slick us up.

I start frotting against him, and Lexi matches me thrust for thrust, nails digging into my hips. My mouth closes on that sexy patch of skin where his neck meets his shoulder.

I wonder if that has a name.

I lick him before I start to suck. He needs to be covered in my marks. I know I said it’s too soon to live together, but matching tattoos would be a great idea.

Thoughts leave me as the tip of his cock catches against the underside of mine with every thrust. The sensation is amazing, and I take his beautiful puffy lips again.

This is perfect. He is perfect.

He moves his hands down over my ass and gently caresses my hole.

“I’m gonna come,” I blurt.

“Come. Come all over me,” he says, “I want you to make me smell like you. Like I’m yours.”

His words send me over the edge, and I’m gone, shouting his name as I come all over his abs. He follows after me a minute later, our seed mixing together.

I grab some tissues from my nightstand and clean up our collective mess that, to be fair, is mainly covering Lexi. Once we’re all cleaned up and I’ve thrown the tissues in the trash can, I drape my body over his before taking his mouth and plunging my tongue between his lips. Slow and sensual.

We spend a few minutes just making out, and I feel his cock start to get a second wind.

This man really is perfect for me. I can’t help but thrust a little. It comes to a screeching halt when what sounds like a shotgun goes off in my room. It’s actually my door banging open, and standing at the entrance is Kait.

“Shit.”

I grab a sheet to cover Lexi and me as I scramble off him.

No one says anything for a good thirty seconds. For the first time since I’ve known her, I can’t read Kait’s face.

“What’s up, sis?” Lexi squeaks. False bravado isn’t his thing.

“Get dressed. I want both of you in the living room in two minutes. I’m not fucking around.” She slams the door behind her as she leaves.

I tear the sheet off and scramble to get my clothes on, Lexi hot on my heels.

“Where did I put my T-shirt?”

“You used it to clean up our cum last night. You’ve been shirtless since then,” Lexi says, pulling his sweats and T-shirt on. “It’s going to be okay. You don’t need to panic.”

“I’m not panicking.” I realize my words might not match my actions, considering I’m tearing my drawer apart to find a shirt.

“You sound like you’re panicking a little.”

“Yeah, well—” The retort dies on my lips as a very familiar, very famous message notification plays in my room. “What is that?”

“Oh, I think I’ve got a notification for something,” Lexi says, picking up his phone and then doing something with it before locking it and putting it back in his pocket.

I’m not stupid. I know what that sound was. Every queer person with internet access and a smartphone knows the sound of that notification. It’s DateMe. It’s not a regular hook-up app. It’s for anyone looking for a relationship.

And that tone just played on Lexi’s phone, and he shrugged like it meant nothing. It means something to me. He means something to me. This isn’t just sex to me, but is that all it is to him? I try and think back over our few weeks together, and we have had a lot of sex. More sex than I’ve ever had in my life. We’ve also hung out together and cooked, and I took him on another drive.

That’s more than just sex. So why does he have that app? Why doesn’t he want me to be his boyfriend?

My eyes sting and my throat hurts.

I want to cry.

Lexi looks up from putting a sock on, and his eyebrows knit in confusion.

I turn away from him and storm into the living room, throwing myself into the armchair so I don’t have to sit next to anyone. Like the guy I happen to be having strong feelings for and assumed was my boyfriend, but is apparently just a sex friend. back in his pocket.

I’m not stupid. I know what that sound was. Every queer person with internet access and a smartphone knows the sound of that notification. It’s DateMe. It’s not a regular hook-up app. It’s for anyone looking for a relationship.

And that tone just played on Lexi’s phone, and he shrugged like it meant nothing. It means something to me. He means something to me. This isn’t just sex to me, but is that all it is to him? I try and think back over our few weeks together, and we have had a lot of sex. More sex than I’ve ever had in my life. We’ve also hung out together and cooked, and I took him on another drive.

That’s more than just sex. So why does he have that app? Why doesn’t he want me to be his boyfriend?

My eyes sting and my throat hurts.

I want to cry.

Lexi looks up from putting a sock on, and his eyebrows knit in confusion.

I turn away from him and storm into the living room, throwing myself into the armchair so I don’t have to sit next to anyone. Like the guy I happen to be having strong feelings for and assumed was my boyfriend, but is apparently just a sex friend.

“Hey, why have you got a face like thunder?” Kait looks at me, confused. Ugh, why does she have to look like her brother when she’s confused.

So fucking inconvenient.

I cross my arms. “No reason.”

“Yeah, okay. That’s totally believable.”

Lexi comes rushing into the room with only one sock on.

“Why did you leave so quickly?” I hate that he looks worried, and I'm the one who put it there. I’m stressing him out, and it makes me fucking angry.

“Why don’t you tell me, Lexi?” He looks at Kait. She just shrugs and sits on my coffee table as if I don’t have any more seats right there.

“I’ve got no idea what’s happening.”

“I heard the DateMe app go off on your phone. Don’t worry. I get it. I’m good enough for you to fuck, but I’m not good enough to have a relationship with. That’s great. Just fucking great. Thank you very much.”

“You’re angry that you think I want to date someone else?” His eyebrows shoot to his hairline so fast that it would be comical in a different situation.

“Yes, Alexis Torrance Hart, that is exactly why I’m angry.”

He looks at Kait. “We will discuss how he knows my middle name later.” His gaze meets mine. “I didn’t know you wanted to date. Let alone me.”

“Of course I want to date you. I already am, which kills me.” I run my hands through my hair, gripping the short waves in frustration.

“Wait, so you want to date me, honestly?” Lexi says, kneeling in front of me and gently pulling my hands free.

“Yes, I would love to fucking date you.”

“You’ve always said no boyfriends and no repeats. I didn’t think I had a chance. I was shocked this was a regular thing. I didn’t want to rock the boat and ask you for more in case you said no and ended it,” he says, close to tears.

I stand and pull him into my arms, giving him a bone-crushing hug before taking his lips.

“I kept saying you’re mine forever.”

“I thought that was just sex stuff in the heat of the moment.” He sniffles.

“Okay, well, I’m saying it now. You are mine, and we are boyfriends.” I kiss his temple. “Now delete that dumb app.”

“I already did. I downloaded it ages ago but never created a profile. That’s what the notification was for.” I smile at him like the goofy loon I know I am when around him.

“This is great,” Kait says, clapping and standing from the coffee table. “I’m glad you guys got that all sorted out and that my best friend and my twin brother are boyfriends. But I am still pissed at both of you because you missed movie night. No more of that. I understand you want to spend time alone but respect the sanctity of nineties movie night. I had to call Josh to come over and spend the evening with me.”

“Who’s Josh?” Lexi asks.

“Isn’t that the name of your football guy?”

She just stares at us.

“I’m sorry. We won’t do that again,” Lexi says, cracking.

“Good. And no ganging up on me. You two are not allowed to exchange sexual favors to get your pick chosen for movie night. It’s not fair.”

“Why don’t we just take it in turns? You can go first?”

“Oh yeah, sure. Good. Okay, I’m gonna leave you to it. I really am happy for you both,” she says softly, pulling us in for a hug for a whole five seconds before she waves her goodbyes and leaves.

“So, boyfriend, give me your cell.” I do as he asks.

“You’re too late. I’ve already deleted all my dating apps.” I tell him with a self-satisfied smirk. I did it after we first had sex. That was a mind-blowing night.

“That’s great. But I was actually thinking…there we go.” He pushes a couple of other buttons before handing my phone back to me.

“What did you do?”

He has a wicked look on his face.

“I ordered some pop rocks.”

Fuck me. Best boyfriend ever.