Chapter Three

Indecent Proposal (11 Letters)

Seb

Despite still being in my human form, I could detect the very faint sounds of the crowd in the arena and David, the incubus commentator, yelling excitedly into the mic as the show began a few hours later.

Holt and Taylor had come back to the office for a while, but now they'd gone to Holt's private box to watch the wrestling. Which meant Larkin and I were alone again. Well, aside from Cora, the little Pomeranian who belonged to Corey, one of the wrestlers here. Larkin always looked after her while the giant orc was performing.

To my surprise, he'd actually stayed at his desk all evening, and did seem to be working. At least, he was staring at his monitor, chin resting in his palm, and occasionally clicking his mouse.

Aside from that and the scratch of my pencil, it was silent. Cora was snoozing on her back in her doggy bed beside Larkin's desk, tongue lolling out and little legs twitching. Neither of us had said a word since Holt and Taylor left, and the atmosphere felt… odd. Usually when I was around Larkin, I was tense because I had to concentrate on hiding any inkling of my feelings for him, but this tension was different. It was external.

It was coming from him.

I was convinced that he didn't want me in here. That I was stopping him from doing whatever he'd actually planned to do once Holt was safely distracted by Taylor and the wrestling. But I still wasn't budging. Call it petty, call it inappropriately possessive, call it pathetic—I just couldn't bring myself to get up and leave him alone. Some shameful, ugly part of me was terrified about what he might slink off to do.

For the dozenth time, I sensed Larkin's gaze sliding over to me. I didn't react, acting like I couldn't tell he was watching me again, even as my gut clenched up tight over what it might mean.

When he drew in a breath to speak—possibly to ask me to get lost so he could make out on his desk with Vince or Dan or Gabe and Biff at the same time—I stiffened with apprehension, my toes curling in my shoes.

"H-hey, Seb…" His tongue darted out to wet his lips, which made my thighs tense as I casually looked over. "Are you… um… seeing anyone right now?"

I stared at him in silence. Why the hell was he asking me that?

"No."

He nodded quickly, throat bobbing once, twice, before he inhaled sharply again. Then exhaled. Then did it again, clearly gearing himself up to say something else.

I was on fucking tenterhooks, holding my breath as I waited.

Why had he asked me that? Not once in the last year and a half had Larkin asked me about my dating life.

"Can I tell you something?" he croaked, gazing at me with those big eyes.

My throat closed up. This was it. He'd started seeing one of the wrestlers in secret. I quickly tried to guess which one. Vince? Larkin talked about the ghoul's long tongue a lot. Dan? He also mused constantly about what it would be like to fuck someone whose head wasn't attached to the rest of them, making a whole slew of unusual sexual positions viable.

Swallowing thickly, I gave him a slight nod. Don't react. Whatever he tells you, just don't react.

"So…" He squirmed, fiddling with a pen and keeping his eyes averted. "Some of the wrestlers have… you know… made it pretty clear that they'd be down to…"

I stayed silent as he trailed off, dreading what I was about to hear.

"And I want to," he rushed out. My heart cracked, just a little. "I really want to. Like, so bad. But the thing is…"

His wings were splayed wide behind him, betraying his nerves. They shivered rapidly, the jewel tones glittering in the glow of the neon Goliaths of Wrestling sign on the wall.

Larkin's face was a deep blue, and his right knee was bouncing rapidly under his desk as he mumbled, "Imavirgin."

It took a few seconds for my brain to process what he'd just said. And when it did, I couldn't say I was all that surprised. I'd seen the signs of it making him nervous when things got a bit too hot and heavy with the wrestlers.

It made sense. That was what had been holding him back from actually taking any of them up on their offers.

But I had no idea why he was telling me.

"There's nothing wrong with that," I said calmly, closing my crossword book to give him my full attention.

"I know, but…" Larkin squirmed again. "They're all so… freaking hot and experienced and… I don't want to… you know. Make a total dingus out of myself."

I let out a slow, silent breath. So that was why he was so edgy and nervous. He was worried about his lack of experience. My chest ached a little. God, what I wouldn't give to gather him into my arms and hold him on my lap. Just hold him and make him feel better.

"Larkin," I began steadily, "No decent person would ever make you feel bad for—"

"So I was wondering." He spoke over me, voice a touch too loud and filled once again with intense nerves. My mouth snapped shut, my whole body going rigid. "I was just wondering… I was wondering if… maybe… you'd be willing to help me out."

I stared at him in stunned silence, then cautiously echoed, "Help you… out?"

He nodded, taking a deep breath and meeting my gaze. "Help me practise."

All the blood in my head rushed south and pooled in my cock, thickening it instantly. My scalp went numb. My fingers spasmed and my toes curled.

"What?" I rasped.

He groaned and squirmed, desk chair jerking side to side. "Come on, bro, you know what I mean. Help me practise. Help me… get over those first hurdles, so to speak. Lose my V-card and learn how to… do stuff."

My cock was so hard that I was genuinely worried the fabric of my pants wouldn't hold up against its straining length, but my brain wasn't yet fully on board, despite my body clamouring for me to agree. I was still confused. And my chest kind of hurt over what this actually meant.

Larkin wanted to fuck the wrestlers, he just wanted to rack up some experience first. This wasn't about him wanting to have sex with me .

"Are you asking me to take your virginity, Larkin?" I asked hoarsely.

He huffed, but his face was still flushed with embarrassment. "I mean, I guess, but purely in a… student-and-teacher kinda way. You'd be, like… my fuckletics instructor. It'd just be practice. You teaching me stuff."

"What stuff?" I couldn't help but ask. He fidgeted self-consciously.

"Just… all of it. I want to actually know what I'm doing when I hook up with some of the wrestlers." He gave me a look that was both defiant and vulnerable. "I want to be good ."

This was madness. It was insane. Why hadn't I already gently told him no? Assured him that no decent person would care that he was inexperienced, and if they did, he shouldn't have sex with them anyway?

I couldn't be his "fuckletics instructor." There was no way in hell my heart would survive having sex with Larkin, being that close to him, only for him to eventually tell me, " Thanks for the lessons, bro! " and move on to fuck his way through the Goliaths. I'd crumble. I'd lose it.

"Why me?" I heard myself ask, my voice thick.

He flushed an even deeper blue, looking down at his desk with a jerky shrug. "I dunno, man, because you're…"

As he trailed off, I tried to stop my mouth from tilting down. He didn't need to say it. I already knew.

I was boring. A safe option. Unintimidating, because I was just quiet, reliable Seb who did crossword puzzles and kept my distance and didn't strut around in skimpy panties or wrestle professionally for my career.

A rush of defiant anger burned in my chest. I needed to turn this ludicrous idea down for my own self-respect. I needed to be the adult here and tell Larkin he should lose his virginity to the person he really wanted and not care about how much experience they may have over him. Sex wasn't a competition. He didn't need to score points. He didn't need to know any special tricks or complicated moves to be good at it.

But something was stopping me. In the awkward silence, Cora snorted in her sleep and kicked her little legs like she was chasing something in her dream.

"Look, just forget it," Larkin blurted, his voice thick with embarrassment. "It was just an idea—"

"Alright."

He sucked in a breath so fast he almost choked. My whole body had gone numb as I realised what I'd just said. As I realised I'd actually just agreed to this ridiculous proposal.

To be Larkin's fuckletics instructor.

To take his virginity.

To teach him how to have sex.

Fuck.

"Seriously?" he croaked, voice jumpy with something I couldn't place. Was it excitement? Nerves? Horror, because he hadn't actually thought I would say yes?

I nodded stiffly, unable to tell if I was a little breathless because I was already massively regretting this or because I was excited about what it meant.

I'd be having sex with Larkin. Touching him. Seeing him naked. Making him come. Getting to find out all the secret places on his body that made him melt, or cry out, or lose all his inhibitions and go wild.

And he'd be doing the same to me. I mean, that was what he was asking, wasn't it? He wanted to learn how to make someone else feel good. How to suck a dick and expertly jerk someone off and make them come. He wanted me to teach him all of that.

And then he'd be going off to put all that practice to use with anyone but me.

This was going to hurt, but it seemed I was a glutton for punishment when it came to Larkin. I was weak when it came to him. And I desperately wanted to help him in any way I could, even if it meant my own heart got shredded in the process.

"But not yet," I heard myself say, my voice echoey in my own head, like I was having an out-of-body experience. "We should both… think about this. Properly. You need to take some time to decide whether this is really what you want."

"It is, dude," Larkin insisted, but his voice was still unsteady with nerves. "I just want to get it out of the way. It's, like, distracting me."

I swallowed. "Alright, well I'm still only agreeing on the condition that we take the time to think it through first. You might change your mind now that you've… actually asked me." Unable to stop myself, I curiously asked, "How long have you been thinking about this?"

He shrugged jerkily. "Like, a few hours."

Fucking hell. He was so impulsive. But now I was worried that if I called this whole thing off, he'd run off with his new, ridiculous idea and ask someone else. Someone who wouldn't treat him with patience and understanding. Someone who just liked the idea of being his first because it turned them on to fuck a virgin, but who didn't actually care about him.

Someone who wasn't me.

"Let's take a little while to think about it," I said with an air of calmness I absolutely was not feeling. "Just so we're both sure this is… a good idea." It definitely wasn't a good idea, for multiple reasons. "Is that okay?"

"Yeah, of course," he rushed out, fidgeting with nervous energy. "Of course. I… Um, th-thank you so much, Seb. For… being cool."

I nodded, staring down at my hands resting limply on my thighs. My fingertips were tingling. My cock was still painfully hard, but thankfully he couldn't see that from his desk.

I'd just agreed to give Larkin sex lessons.

I already knew I wouldn't come out the other side of this with my heart or my sanity intact.