Chapter Eleven

Partner for Life (8 Letters)

Seb

"You've met someone."

My strained frown deepened as I glanced up at Ludo, who was spotting me while I bench pressed at our local gym on Thursday morning.

"No, I haven't." It wasn't a lie. I hadn't met anyone.

I'd just started fooling around with the person I'd been pining over for a year and a half.

So he could practise having sex to go off and fuck other people.

"You've started seeing someone, at least."

Grunting through my last rep, I lifted the barbell and Ludo helped me slot it onto the rack, still eyeing me suspiciously as I sat up. I didn't answer, trying to catch my breath and lifting the hem of my T-shirt to wipe the sweat from my forehead.

"Who?" he pressed.

I rolled my eyes. Werewolves could be just as relentless as dogs when we caught scent of something. And Ludo had clearly decided he'd caught scent of something going on with me .

"I haven't met anyone," I reiterated in a grunt, standing up so we could swap places.

A young orc was hovering nearby, clearly waiting to use the bench, but gym etiquette and all that. We'd got here first, and we were alternating. While this place didn't cater exclusively to non-humans, it was run by an orc couple, so a lot of the supernaturals in town chose to come here. Which meant it was always stupidly busy.

I knew I could've just used the gym equipment at the club, but some of those wrestlers were insufferable when it came to working out, probably because they were in a whole different league. I'd done it once and decided never again. Dullahan Dan liked to ‘help' by eagerly showing different, better ways to work muscle groups, while Crossbody preferred to just stand there and imperiously let everyone know what they were doing wrong without offering any help at all.

"But you're seeing someone." Ludo smirked at me as he settled on the bench. "You're getting some. I can tell, man."

"How can you tell that?" I asked flatly, like I wasn't interested in the answer.

He snorted, lying back and wrapping his hands around the barbell. "Pal, we've been friends for years. I know the signs. You're just… different. More relaxed, but tense at the same time. Which means it's new."

I huffed derisively, hovering my hands over the bar to spot him. "How do you figure that?"

"Because you're not a particularly easy-going guy, Seb. When you like someone, you like them." He grunted through a rep. "So you get all wound up about making the best impression, being extra attentive and all that stuff. Doing the most."

I couldn't really argue with that, so I stayed silent. That was normally true, but this wasn't a normal situation with Larkin. He didn't want to date me. We weren't seeing each other or embarking on a new relationship.

I hadn't been in a fuck buddy type situation since my early twenties, but this wasn't that either. This was a surreal, probably ill-advised arrangement that was definitely going to get messy. For me, at least. Larkin would be fine when it ended.

I'd be a wreck. I already knew it.

I wasn't typically one for casual sex. I liked being with someone, getting to know all of them, spending time together outside of fucking. I liked the dinners spent anticipating what might follow, the lazy and relaxed mornings after, the boring stuff like going grocery shopping together, and just watching TV and cooking for someone other than myself.

Those things wouldn't ever happen with Larkin. I was slowly coming to terms with it, trying to force myself to be in the moment and enjoy what I could have with him.

I was trying not to worry about what would happen to me when he decided he didn't need any more "sex lessons." That was a problem for the future, and while I was a habitual forward-thinker, if I let myself start obsessing over this thing's inevitable end, I was going to fuck up the tiny scrap of Larkin I was being offered right now. Even though I knew this was eventually going to hurt worse than possibly anything else, I also knew I'd always regret messing up my one chance to experience the parts of him I never thought I'd get to witness.

"So." Ludo had got through his set while I was lost in thought, so I quickly helped him lift the barbell onto the rack. "Who is it?"

I huffed and grabbed my water bottle. "It's… nothing."

Ludo frowned, standing up and wiping down the bench before we moved away from it so the young orc could hurry forward to claim his turn. "You don't want to tell me?"

I sighed. Ludo was one of my oldest friends. We'd met shortly after I'd moved here about ten years ago. My parents still lived in the next town over, so they weren't far and I saw them often, as well as my two sisters and their kids.

"It's just a weird situation, man," I told him. "It's… not serious. So."

"That's not like you." We made our way over to the rowing machines to finish our workout with some cardio. Lowering his voice, Ludo asked, "Are they human? Is that why it can't get serious?"

It was rare for supernaturals to form long-lasting relationships with humans. It required an incredible amount of trust to confide something so strange and possibly difficult to grasp in a human so that you could form a true, honest relationship with one. Holt and Taylor's situation was unique, and it was just lucky that Taylor had been so understanding. Telling a human we existed put the entire community at risk.

I didn't like lying, and I really didn't want to lie to Ludo, but this was an easy excuse. "Yeah. They're human."

Ludo stopped and looked at me. Werewolves latched on and bonded strongly with each other, especially if we were away from our familial packs. The two of us were close—close enough that he could tell something was up.

"I don't think that's actually it, but if you don't want to talk about it right now, that's okay, man." He squeezed my shoulder. "I'm here if you change your mind."

"Thanks."

"Don't let them mess your head up." His brows drew together in concern. "You're a sensitive guy, Seb, and you feel things strongly. Don't make me go and kick some turd's ass if they make you feel like shit."

I huffed in amusement, patting his side. "I can handle it."

I didn't think I actually could, but I wasn't willing to stop. I needed more of Larkin. More time with him, more chances to see him desperate and pleading and shivering with pleasure, knowing I was the one to make him feel like that.

We finished up our workout and showered, then parted ways as Ludo headed off to his construction job—a family-owned business, run by his uncle—while I made my way to the club.

It had been two days since our impromptu "second lesson" at work, and I was already getting tense and impatient to have Larkin again. Show him something new.

Maybe show him how well I could suck him off this time. Slowly, drawing it out until he was a shivering, panting mess. Feeling him come in my mouth, knowing I was taking a part of him that he could never take back. I tried not to think too hard about the fact that I was going to be his first for pretty much everything, because I didn't think he cared all that much about that. He was just concerned with getting it all out of the way. It wouldn't mean anything to him. This was all just a means to an end.

Holt had told me that he planned to take some time off this week to be with Taylor as much as possible before he officially started his new role as Goliaths' marketing manager. He'd asked if I wanted to take the week off, seeing as he wouldn't be around much, but I'd refused. I mean, my job was pretty redundant already when it came down to it—Holt definitely didn't actually need a bodyguard. I was fairly sure he only had one for the image it portrayed—but my main motive for coming to work while he wasn't even there was because I didn't want to go that long without seeing Larkin.

I didn't want to risk him deciding he was ready to try out his new skills on one of the wrestlers.

Holt had been popping in and out of work erratically since Tuesday. He'd left Larkin a list of stuff to do, and I'd never appreciated my boss more. I'd grown tense when I found out that Holt and Taylor would be off for the majority of the week, convinced that Larkin would just go and hang out backstage with the wrestlers as much as possible while the boss wasn't around.

But he hadn't. He'd stayed in the office. I didn't think he'd actually been working all that much—a few times I'd gone and sat in there with him, and he'd either been playing on his phone or we'd ended up talking casually.

As much as I told myself not to, for my own sake, I found myself talking to him more. Laughing and joking with him. Getting closer to him in that way was a bad idea. It was just going to make this all so much more painful when it ended, but I couldn't help myself. I loved talking to him. He was funny and sweet and a little clueless about some things, but not unintelligent. He just didn't know much about stuff that didn't already actively interest him, but he was eager to learn new things.

And honestly, I could just listen to him talk for hours. It didn't matter what it was about. Gaming, his little brother pissing him off, what he'd had for dinner the night before, the weird bug his dad had brought in from the yard, the kooky customer his mom had told him about who'd gone into her shop. I just liked his voice. I liked hearing him be so animated about everything. He was so energetic. Full of life.

It made sense that he wanted to experience everything he could, not just in terms of life, but sex specifically. That was just who he was. And he was still young. He didn't want to settle down and get serious at his age. Some people never did, and that was perfectly fine.

I did, though. I wanted serious. I wanted simple and quiet and uncomplicated. It was my problem alone that I wanted it all with him, and it would be unforgiveable of me to start trying to turn our arrangement into something he hadn't intended it to be, especially when he'd been so upfront about what it was. There were no false pretences here. No empty promises. The nature of what we were doing had been clearly laid out from the start in unmistakable terms.

On my way to the office, I stopped and grabbed a newspaper. I knew Holt would definitely be coming in today, because there was a show tonight, but I wasn't sure what time he'd be making an appearance. I'd need to pass the time so I didn't sit there imagining Larkin spread out on a desk, grinding his pretty blue cock against mine with his head tipped back and his pulse pounding in his throat, face scrunched up with pleasure.

My chest ached with longing as I opened the office door and saw him already sitting behind his desk, spinning his chair in a slow circle as he played on his phone. His head popped up as he stopped abruptly, grinning at me.

"Morning."

"Morning." I closed the door behind me. "Mind if I sit in here?"

"No way. Of course not." His cheeks briefly stained dark blue, before he lunged for a takeout cup on his desk. "Oh, I got you a drink. It's, um, hot chocolate… again…?"

He trailed off uncertainly, because I'd definitely confused him with my drink orders. Yesterday he'd done the same thing, but that time I'd actually accepted the hot chocolate, because I didn't want to make it too obvious that I was only asking for them so he could drink them.

"What did you get yourself?" I asked casually, making my way over.

"Coffee…?" he said just as hesitantly, seemingly waiting for me to pick.

I pursed my lips and cocked my head, eyeing the two cups on his desk like I was trying to decide between them.

"Think I'll have the coffee today," I told him, then flashed him a brief grin. His eyes lit up, mouth curving into a smile.

"'Kay." He passed me one of the cups, then quickly grabbed the other and took a deep gulp. "Mmm."

God, that sound. That desperate, tight little moan, just like when he was trying to hold back from coming, basking in the sensations I was inflicting on him like he'd never felt anything better.

My cock started to thicken, so I took my coffee over to the couch and sat, getting settled with my newspaper.

"What time do you think Holt will be in today?" Larkin asked, licking his lips as he set down his cup.

"Probably just a couple hours before the show starts. It's good that he's taking some time off to be with Taylor." Holt was a bit of a workaholic.

"Yeah." Larkin grinned at me, his big blue eyes sparkling. "Think they'll get married?"

I chuckled. "I get the feeling Holt would marry Taylor tomorrow if he accepted."

"Yeah." There was a pause. "I've never seen boss man in a relationship before. I didn't know he'd get so… mushy and shit. And so fast, too."

I smiled, but it was a little tight. "I guess when you meet the right person, that's it. There's no point hanging around, because there's no one else who could compare."

"That's what my dad says." He snorted. "My parents got married, like, three weeks after meeting. In a meadow or something. They said they just knew . And they've been happily married for decades now, so I guess they were right."

"Yeah." My chest ached again, and I resisted the urge to reach up and rub it. I forced myself to say, "But that doesn't happen for everyone—instantly knowing when you meet that person, I mean. And for some people, it never does, and that's okay too."

There was a moment of silence, before Larkin tentatively asked, "Do you… do you think that'll happen to you?"

It already has.

I struggled to answer at first, my eyes burning as I stared down at my paper, not taking in any of the words. Eventually, I cleared my throat and muttered, "Yes."

It's you, Larkin. You're my person. You're the one no one else will ever compare to.

As if sensing my inner turmoil, he went quiet and turned to his computer, leaving me to read my paper in peace. Predictably, after just ten minutes of doing work, he sighed and picked up his phone.

My mouth twitched, warm affection flowing through me. Glancing over, I asked, "How much is left on your list?"

"Like, a lot." He sighed again and set his phone down to rest his cheek on the desk. "It's all boring stuff too."

"Want some help?"

His head popped up, cheeks flushing. He shook his head quickly. "No way, dude. That's not your job. You don't have to do that."

"I don't mind." I folded my paper and stood up. "It'll pass the time."

Rounding his desk to stand beside him, I leaned down and scanned the email from Holt on his screen. I heard Larkin's breath catch, his face right beside mine. One of his wings brushed against my suit jacket as they fluttered.

"Says the most important thing is to call the supplier to get the merch replenished before this week's shows."

"I already did that," he said quickly. "The delivery's coming this afternoon."

"Alright." I looked again. "And the restock for the bar?"

"Done that. Everything came yesterday."

I turned my head to give him a tiny smile. Larkin struggled to concentrate a lot, and he probably wasn't the best assistant, but he wasn't downright irresponsible. He did the stuff that was needed to keep the club running smoothly. Although I was sure his motive for that was just to keep Holt from getting pissed at him.

He grinned back, looking pleased at my mild display of approval. Before my gaze could drift down to his mouth, which was so close to mine, I looked back at the screen.

"Did you get the plumber to come and fix the leak in the restrooms?"

"Shit. No. I put it off because he's such a grouch and I hate talking to him." Larkin nibbled on his lower lip anxiously. "Fuck. Holt's gonna be pissed that it's not fixed for tonight."

"I'll call the plumber. He knows Ludo, so I think I could get him to come down and do it today."

"Really?" Larkin gazed at me with wide eyes, as if I'd just offered to give him one of my kidneys.

Which I would absolutely do.

I nodded, straightening up. "Get me his number and I'll do it now."

"Are you sure?" He was still gazing up at me with those big, guileless eyes. "I feel bad, dude. You shouldn't have to. It's not your job."

"I don't mind." I would do literally anything for him, so this was nothing. "And then we'll move on to something else on the list."

He beamed up at me, looking beyond grateful. It took everything in me not to lunge and crush my mouth to his.

"Thank you so much, Seb. I'll make it up to you." His breath hitched, eyes growing jumpy and excited as he peeked up at me. "I'll definitely make it up to you."

My cock twitched. I managed to give him a wry smile, resisting the desire to reach down and stroke his cheek. His skin was so clear and smooth, and now I knew how it felt under my fingers. Like silk.

I wanted to rub my face over every inch of him. Breathe in his sweet, caramel-and-bonfire scent and get it all over me. Mark myself as his.

Because I was. He'd never know it, and he was sweet and kind-hearted enough to probably feel guilty about it if he ever found out, which was why I'd never tell him. This wasn't his burden to bear. It was mine.

But I'd always be his. When this all ended, and he'd moved on to live his life, and one or both of us eventually left Goliaths for a new job and our flimsy connection through work fizzled out, I would still be his.

Larkin was it for me, but I was wise enough and mature enough to know that sometimes, that just wasn't enough.