Chapter Twenty-One

" I have gone too far!" Clarity moaned while Purity brushed her hair.

"Why did you push your luck in such a manner?" her sister asked.

"I thought to remind him again of how good life can be."

"In a tree?" Purity shook her head. "You always knew how to have fun, but you were never reckless, at least not since you donned stays. What has gotten into you?"

Miserable, Clarity felt tears well up.

"I am in love with Alex."

Purity barely hesitated in brushing before she nodded. "And you're trying to show him by nearly getting you both killed?"

"Of course not! I simply want him to like me the way he used to." She broke into wrenching sobs.

"Nonsense," Purity scolded. "You don't want him to like you as a boy likes a girl. You want him to love you as a man loves a woman. I admit I find Lord Hollidge a bit stiff, but he's better than he was a month ago at the first ball. You have done wonders already, and he will see your suitability."

"I have done nothing," Clarity said through her tears.

"You have been a good friend to him and reminded him how to laugh. Being around you has awakened his latent sense of fun."

Clarity dabbed at her face with her handkerchief.

"Do you think so?"

"Yes. Now that he is practically ready to fall for you, instead of falling on top of the man, why don't you show him what a fine lady you've grown to be?"

"I won't pretend to be a Mrs. Princum Prancum," Clarity protested.

"No one would believe it if you did. You don't have to become like his Aunt Elizabeth, just a little less of a tomboy."

"You know I never liked that term. I am female through and through." They used to squabble when children about this same issue. While Clarity was out having her own kind of fun, flying a kite or braiding the horses' manes, Purity practiced the pianoforte and became adept at painting.

"I know you are, dear sister. And a rum doxy, too," she said, not using the most acceptable of terms except between sisters. "But perhaps with the fishing and the archery, Lord Hollidge has forgotten what a prime article you are. If you want the man to worship you, you must dazzle him."

"Dazzle him?" Clarity repeated.

"Dazzle him!" Purity concluded. "Wear your blue silk dress to the dance, and let Mary do your hair in the pink of the fashion with ringlets to spare."

"But Miss Brambury," Clarity reminded her, "is the paragon of placid perfection."

" Pish! She has nothing you do not have."

Then why had Clarity never felt more inferior in her life?

"Emmeline is a little taller, and she has that tawny-colored hair, currently in fashion, not black as a crow's wing."

"I like to think of our hair more as a raven's wing," Purity said, touching her locks, "or even rare obsidian."

"That does sound better than an old crow." Clarity put her arms around her sister. "Thank you. You should be the eldest."

"I should be," Purity agreed, "but no matter our order, never forget, we are Diamonds of the first water."

Her sing-song voice caused them both to start laughing over how many times they'd heard the phrase since coming out into society, and each time spoken by a man who thought he was saying something beyond clever.

"Very well," Clarity agreed. "I shall dazzle him!"

It was hard to show off one's gown and hairstyle to a man who wasn't there. Alex had disappeared, vanished after she'd fallen on him and walked away. Clarity feared he might have left Oak Grove Hall, but their butler confirmed his things were still in his room.

He hadn't shown up for the light buffet dinner before the dance, nor was he there for the opening grand march. Neither was Miss Brambury.

"They have run off together," Clarity predicted miserably. "Probably to Scotland."

"No, dear," said her mother. "Such people as Miss Brambury and, unfortunately, the young man Alex has become do not dash off to Gretna Green. They have banns and announcements and parties. Then they get married in the heart of London, have a staid wedding breakfast, and go off on a short, honeymoon somewhere extremely ordinary, such as Norwich or Leeds. Bath, if he's lucky, but only for his new wife to attend to her health. Moreover, because they know little of one another, which is painfully obvious, Miss Brambury will insist on a female companion to ease the transition to wedded life."

Clarity's eyes widened. "Mother, are you clairvoyant?" For surely, Alex had mentioned such a plan for his marriage, barring the part about another woman going on his wedding trip.

"No, sweet girl. It's simply predictable and dull, neither of which describes you. I wish Alex wasn't, either. His parents most definitely were not, and I am sorry he turned out that way."

Clarity recalled the conversation in her mother's sitting room.

"Because he blames himself for Lord and Lady Hollidge's death." She wasn't divulging any secrets by explaining it to her mother. "Since the age of thirteen, Alex has carried guilt over being too rambunctious and high-spirited, thinking he caused his parents to want to send him to Eton. I know it's not the case, and I even told him, but I'm not sure he believed me."

"Poor man," Lady Diamond said. "No wonder he became so serious."

Clarity nodded. If he hadn't run away with Miss Brambury, where was he?

"I have to get back to the ball. These things don't run themselves," her mother said.

"May I search for him?" Clarity asked.

Her mother's brow furrowed, a rare expression for her usually carefree face.

"I suppose. But not out on the grounds alone, and no farther than the stables."

"The stables!" Clarity repeated. "Mother, you're brilliant!"

Clarity knew with certainty Alex would be there. Whenever they had got themselves into the suds, he retreated to the loft, and sometimes she followed him. And often on the morning before his family was to leave, he went there. Sometimes Clarity thought he might try to hide up there in hopes his family left him, especially when his aunt was sharing their carriage.

In five minutes, she was at the base of the ladder.

Softly, she called up to him, but there was no response. With her gown draped over her left arm and her legs exposed up to her knees, Clarity climbed the ladder.

A sigh of relief escaped her when she saw him, stretched out in the hay. He'd removed his coat and balled it under his head and had one arm over his face, apparently sleeping soundly.

Rolling her eyes, she smiled, wishing she could capture this peaceful moment and look at it whenever she wished to see him. Instead, she committed it to memory and then dropped to her knees beside him.

"Alex," she said. "Wake up, please."

He stirred, slowly lowering his arm and opening his eyes, until he was peering up at her. Then he grinned, and her heart lurched against her ribs.

"You look beautiful," he said. "Am I dreaming?"

Before she could answer, his hand snaked out and grabbed hold of her arm, dragging her across his chest.

"You feel real. Very warm and soft."

Her pulse racing, blissfully happy to be in his arms again, Clarity could hardly speak.

"I am real."

"I was dreaming about you. Thus, I'm not sure," he said. "Let me test."

With one of his hands at the back of her head, and the other at her back, he pulled her down for a kiss, agonizingly tender until the moment it wasn't.

Like oil in a hot pan, their mouths sizzled, and her body burned where it rested atop his. She wished she could strip off all her garments and his, too, and feel his bare skin against her own. It was her greatest yearning, to be naked with him.

When his mouth opened under hers, she slid her tongue inside, and he groaned. In a dizzying motion, Alex rolled her over until she was on her back, and he loomed above her.

"My Diamond," he murmured.

A shard of bittersweet memory pierced her as she remembered him calling her by that same name. Although there were five siblings, she was his , the one who would play his games and get into trouble with him.

"Come along, my Diamond, we shall see what we can do with this rare find of milk paint." They had wickedly turned one of the brown horses dappled white.

"The day is fine, my Diamond, and we shall sail to the West Indies." They'd made a wretched raft that broke apart as soon as they put it in the river beyond the pasture.

"Alex." His name came out as a whisper of wanting, and she closed her eyes, thinking she might cry.

Lacing their fingers, he captured her hands in the straw on either side of her head, and then his mouth claimed hers again. Every particle of her body was tingling with urgency. Where their hips met, she pulsated maddeningly, and squirmed beneath him, trying to ease her plight.

His lips left hers to scorch a path along her chin and down her neck, and she arched to give him better access. Releasing her hands, he levered himself on his forearms so he could gaze down at her.

Her thin silk gown had a fashionably low neckline that gave him pause.

"I like this dress," Alex murmured against the upward swell of her right breast. "Very much." Then he licked her heated skin.

Gasping, she bit her lower lip as liquid heat pooled at her core.

"It's almost too easy," he said, tugging gently at the décolletage until both her breasts were exposed.

Wild and wanton, and nearly desperate, Clarity wanted his mouth on...

"Yes!" she hissed.

His lips had closed over one of her nipples. When he sucked and soothed it with his tongue, her body jerked at the sensual assault. And when he treated the other nipple in a similar fashion, she couldn't help the soft sounds of pleasure that he drew from her, while shivers danced down her spine.

But she wanted more.

"You must touch me," she begged, writhing against the prickly hay beneath her.

"I know I have been a tedious bore," he said, drawing her skirt up with one hand until the cool night air caressed her silk stockings and the bare skin of her thighs above them.

He'd never bored her, yet she couldn't find her voice to gainsay him.

"But I hope you will do me the honor of marrying me, anyway?" he added.

She didn't hesitate. "Yes! Just touch me!"

His husky laugh caused the junction of her thighs to throb with need. And when his fingers tantalized the soft curls between her legs, her body hummed with anticipation. Finally, the pad of his thumb touched her pulsing bud.

"Oh!" she breathed out on a sigh.

In the space of a heartbeat, the long-simmering yearning blazed through her veins while every muscle coiled and tensed. Alex stroked her again and again, rapidly yet delicately sending her into an exquisite euphoria.

Gripping him tightly, she clenched her fingers into the fabric at his shoulders.

Lifting her hips to give him better access, she couldn't control her movements or stop the thundering tremors that shook her. Eyes closed, arching against his hand, her legs splayed farther open, and then she keened as a quivering release took hold of her.

With her body trembling from the power of it, she was grateful he kept touching her while the sensations peaked and then began to ebb.

For a long moment, she could do nothing but breathe deeply as his fingers slowed their blissful movements. Her heart was still racing, but her body calmed and stilled.

"Sweet Mary!" she muttered, opening her eyes.

Alex had a half-smirk on his handsome face. It made her chuckle.

"I bet you want to sleep now," he said, brushing his knuckles against her cheek.

Part of her did, but there was another part that knew there was more.

"No, I want ... you." She cupped her palm against his face.

"Clarity," he warned.

She lifted her hips. "All of you. I've waited long enough."

"Proper ladies don't do that until after they're married."

"Proper?" she repeated, wishing the word had never been invented. "Like Miss Brambury."

"She's gone," he said. "Before I fell asleep, I heard a footman ask the stable boy to hook up the carriage to take one of the guests to the station. By the way, I am eternally grateful you are nothing like her."

She digested this fact — Emmeline was gone!

"You sent her away because you don't want her?" she asked, needing to be sure.

"Correct."

" Hm. " The evening was getting better and better. "Well, I am a proper lady, yet I still want all of you. That is, if you are truly going to marry me."

"Oh, you remember that, do you?" He pretended to wince.

She giggled. "I do. And it's the only time in our whole lives I shall ask if you were being serious?"

"I was. I am! Desperately serious, in fact. I cannot imagine a life without you by my side." Then he cupped her breast. "And under me. And sometimes astride me."

"You are not being serious!" she scolded.

"I am. I love you, Clarity Diamond. And you cannot take it back. You said yes."

"I love you, Alexander Ashley. I don't want to take it back. I cannot wait to marry you." She stroked his cheek again. "And I cannot wait for the other thing, either."

"As you wish. I have grown into a responsible man. I cannot leave my lady wanting more. It would be grossly irresponsible! Why, the code of gentlemanly behavior practically dictates I concede to your wishes and make love to you!"

And he did, slowly penetrating her before beginning a steady rhythm with his hips until she couldn't catch her breath and would swear she saw stars swirling behind her closed eyelids.

Gracious!