Chapter 19

Dr. Wallace shines a small flashlight into my eyes. "Do you feel dizzy or nauseous?"

"No, just a headache." I try not to flinch away from the bright light. "My face hurts."

"You're going to have some colorful bruising." He gives me a sympathetic look. "Apply a cold compress for fifteen to twenty minutes today and tomorrow. It will help keep down the swelling."

While waiting for my turn with the doctor, I had glanced in the bathroom mirror. The left side of my face appeared red and swollen, with a budding purple bruise on my cheekbone and broken blood vessels in the white of my eye, making the blue stand out vividly.

But at least I didn't need stitches like Jade did.

"Your pupils dilate normally, so I don't think you have a concussion." Dr. Wallace tucks the flashlight into his pocket and straightens. "Keep the wrist wounds clean and dry. Wrap them in gauze, and if they become hot or seep pus, call me, and I'll return."

"Thank you. We will." I glance down at the white bandages around my wrist. They throb in rhythm to the bruises on my face, making me want to lie down.

Dr. Wallace packs up his equipment. "I must say, aside from the new wounds, you're looking much healthier than the last time I saw you."

The observation brings a smile to my face. "Nolan's been feeding me three meals a day with healthy snacks."

"That's good." His expression turns serious. "I need to ask if anything else happened. Did you get hit in your abdomen? It could endanger the health of your baby, if there is one."

"All the blows were to my face, but it doesn't matter, anyway." Which may be a small blessing. Tony came so close to drugging me. Had I been pregnant, being forced into Heat would have caused a miscarriage. "I took a bunch of at-home tests this morning, and there's no baby."

"Those tests aren't reliable until four weeks after the end of your last Heat. That's why we had planned to do a blood test; it can detect pregnancy as early as ten days post-conception." Dr. Wallace's expression softens, and he places a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Would you like me to take a sample today and give you a more definitive answer?"

My heart stutters before beating faster.

Is there still a chance I'm carrying Nolan's child? I realize I want this more than anything, but it also terrifies me. My parents were horrible role models, and I worry if I won't be any better. But Nolan's family is large and close-knit. With their support, our baby will be loved and cared for.

"Yes, please." I push up my sleeve. "I want to know for sure."

"Excellent." Dr. Wallace prepares the necessary equipment, and as he takes my blood, he explains how it will work.

The blood draw barely stings, and smiley faces cover the band-aid he uses to hold down the cotton swab.

I watch him stow the filled vials. "Can we keep this between us for now? I don't want to get Nolan's hopes up again unless we're certain."

Dr. Wallace studies me for a moment, then nods solemnly. "Of course, Leo. Your privacy is important to me. I won't mention it to Nolan until we have the results."

Relief floods through me. "Thank you."

Dr. Wallace makes sure I've memorized my wound care instructions, then hands me a bag of antibacterial solution and bandages before departing.

With a deep breath to steady myself, I make my way downstairs to join Nolan, Jade, and Caleb in the front room of the townhouse.

Caleb and Jade perch on one of the delicate love seats while Nolan paces, speaking intently into his phone.

When I enter, his green eyes flick to me, and he strides over to cup the uninjured side of my head and drop a kiss on my hair.

"Leo, come sit down. Your poor face must hurt so bad." Jade waves his arm, where the white bandage wrapped around his bicep stands out beneath the shorn sleeve of his black shirt. "Look! We're gauze buddies."

As he breaks out in giggles, Caleb shakes his head with indulgence. "Ignore him. The doctor gave him drugs."

My body throbs in time to my pulse as I take the accent chair next to Caleb. Dr. Wallace only administered an anti-inflammatory for me and left acetaminophen for if the pain worsens.

"Dammit!" Nolan rubs a hand through his dark brown hair, frustration clear on his face.

I lean toward Caleb, my voice low. "What's going on?"

"He's checking in with the clean-up team." Jade leans across Caleb to get closer to me. "They're responsible for dealing with the bodies and wiping the place clean of anything that can tie us to the crime scene. Tie…"

His eyes widen. "Nolan was going to tie you up." He rears up, nearly head-butting Caleb in the chin. "Did you know Nolan was kinky?"

"Shut up, brat." Caleb pushes him back on the couch.

Jade collapses against the armrest, falling silent as the ornate decorations on the ceiling distract him.

Caleb turns back to me. "How are you feeling?"

I touch my tender face. "I'm going to have some bruises for a couple of weeks, and the deeper wounds on my wrists may scar, but I'll live."

"Living is what matters." Caleb's fingers brush my bandages. "Take the scars as proof that you survived."

A lump forms in my throat, and I nod.

"Alright, I understand." Frustration laces Nolan's voice. "Keep me informed."

He hangs up and pockets his phone.

"Everything okay?" I ask, trying to stop fear from overtaking me.

At least one person was killed today. If the police had arrived before the warehouse was cleaned up…

Nolan's expression softens as he looks at me. "Yes, there's just been a minor complication. My shot didn't kill Tony, and the rat got away."

I stiffen. "Are you in danger?"

"No, nothing like that." He catches my hand and tugs me up to take my chair, then pulls me onto his lap. "He and Bugrov on the run, but our people will catch up with him. In the meantime, we can look into the local gang's involvement with your kidnapping. They're already on our list to deal with, but if they're targeting our family, we need to escalate things."

"Actually, I don't think the gang had anything to do with this. Gino and Tony were too disorganized. They didn't even have a plan for how to send the ransom." I take a deep breath, anger and shame warring within me. "Gino also admitted that my debt to the gang was all fake. He made the whole thing up. He and Tony were scamming me from the very beginning. My brother, Foley, never took out a loan."

Nolan's expression shifts from surprise to rage in an instant. "Then why did Gino target you?"

"When I asked the same thing, he implied that we've met before." I pull Nolan's arms around me. "I think Gino knew Foley, and he must have told him about me."

"I'm so sorry. Gino's confidence in coming after you probably means that your brother is dead, as you suspected." Nolan takes my hand. "But we can find out for sure. At the very least, we'll locate his body so you can lay him to rest."

His words fill me with more worry than reassurance. Messing with the gangs is risky. If they're not aware of what's been going on, I don't want Nolan drawing their attention.

I meet his steady gaze. "Foley isn't a part of my life, and now Gino is dealt with. Finding out what happened to my brother isn't worth putting you or your family in danger."

"That's so sweet." Jade pats the side of Caleb's face. "Isn't he so sweet? I want to bubble wrap him so he never changes."

Caleb sighs and stands, hauling Jade up. "I'll leave you to handle this conversation. We need to report to the President."

"Mmm, yummy. Aaiden's so hot." Jade sways against Caleb. "I want to climb him like a tree."

A beat of silence follows before Caleb laughs. "Oh, damn, I'm so going to hold that over your head when the drugs wear off."

"Get him home safely." Nolan cuddles me closer, making no move to see them out. "And thank you for today."

"Anytime." Caleb drags Jade to the door. "That's what family is for."

Nolan lifts one of my wrists and kisses the bandage. "What did the doctor say?"

"I'll heal." Unexpected tears rise to my eyes, and a tremor goes through me. "He said I should ice my f-face…"

"Oh, my sweet boy." Nolan gingerly tucks me against his shoulder. "I'm so sorry you went through this because of me."

"I was so stupid to believe Gino," I sob into his shirt. "And then I got myself kidnapped and put you in danger."

"Shhh. You were scared." He rubs my back. "You've been in survival mode for a long time. When I walked into that warehouse and saw you hurt, it terrified me, but I could also see that you fought like hell. You are so much stronger than you realize."

"I'm not, though." I sniffle and wipe my eyes. "If I hadn't doubted you, I never would have been in that position."

"Or they would have found a different way to get to you." He tucks a lock of hair behind my ear. "If I was more transparent about my family, you would have known the risk being with me posed, but I was selfish. I didn't want to scare you away. Once you're in, it's for life, though. No more offers of NDAs and payoffs. No more running away. This is for life. So you need to be sure this is what you want."

Rather than instilling fear, the warning brings me comfort. When Nolan asked if I would be with him forever, it wasn't mere words; it was a vow. "You killed Rich and Gino, and I'm still here. I'm not afraid of the blood on your hands. When I left, I thought it was for your happiness, because you loved Jade, but I'm not going to be a martyr again. You're mine, and I'm yours."

"That's right, sweet boy. I'm yours, and so is my family." He cups my uninjured cheek. "We're not good people, but we have our own code that we live by. We have rules for what's allowed in our territories, and when people cross those lines, we take care of them. Sometimes that involves doing things that others might consider extreme."

"Like killing," I say, the words a statement instead of a question.

"Yes." He holds my eyes. "That doesn't scare you?"

I shift on his lap to straddle him. "The only thing I'm afraid of is you being hurt."

"I can't promise to stay out of danger." Nolan grips my hips. "But I will always come home to you, no matter the cost."

"Then I won't be afraid. I already had an idea that you were crossing the line of legality when I told your family I wanted to spend the rest of my life loving you, and I meant it." I take his hand. "I want to know."

Nolan searches my face, and when he doesn't find any sign of hesitation there, he squeezes my fingers. "The Rockford family has been around for a long time. They started as landowners, buying property and businesses whenever they could. They used the money they made from that to smuggle guns but eventually moved into drugs and prostitution. They built a sizeable fortune, but my grandfather somehow managed to gamble it all away.

"Our father refilled the family coffers by returning to crime. He focused less on guns and drugs and moved into sex clubs and money laundering. The family already had a number of cash heavy businesses, so washing money was easy to integrate."

"Your clubs?" I ask.

He nods. "One of several places where we make dirty money clean. We also run the docks, making sure the right officials are on duty when smugglers move their products."

"Drugs?" He nods. "Gun trafficking?"

"Yes, although we've found more ways to make money and are moving away from guns and drugs." His thumb rubs over my fingers. "We're getting heavily into imported cheeses, caviar, high-end fashion, art, etc. Whatever the market demands."

"Slaves?" I whisper.

"No." His firm tone reassures me. "As I said, we have a code. We don't allow human trafficking. We don't allow drug dealers to target children. We're working to get rid of the gangs that terrorize neighborhoods like yours. We invest in affordable living and schools, too, implementing meal plan programs. Not everything we do is bad, but we do cross that line, and I won't hide it from you."

Drugs had stolen my brother from me, but I can't blame Foley's addiction on Nolan any more than I can blame him for my mother's need for alcohol.

Nolan touches my cheek. "Leo?"

I place my palm over his heart. "Now that I know the family business, does this mean I get a tattoo like yours?"

Nolan's gaze roves over my body. "You want one?"

I bite my lip. "Does it have to be as big as yours? I'm not very good with pain. Can I be a tiny cog?"

"You're already a tiny cog." He flattens his hand on my chest, his fingers spanning the length of my collarbone. "But if we're talking about how big of a part you are to my family, your tattoo will need to cover your entire body. You're going to be the man I come home to, and the papa of my children, after all."

My throat tightens. "Are you disappointed about the negative tests?"

"A little. I was excited to see you round as a beach ball." His hand moves down to my stomach. "But that also means we get to spend another Heat together trying again."

He leans forward to kiss my neck. "And again."

His lips move to my uninjured cheek. "And again."

My pulse quickens, and I tip my head back. "That's a lot of attempts you're talking about. Maybe we should practice, so we get it right."

His smile forms against my skin before he grabs my ass and stands. Gasping, I hold on tight as he heads for the stairs.