Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2

ELEANOR

F irst times are uncomfortable and painful.

That’s what Elena, my nursemaid, had told me in an unsolicited attempt to educate me before my mating night.

But all I felt was a pleasure so heady that I felt disconnected from reality, like I was in a cocoon where only Alexander and I existed.

Only his lips on my skin could cool the raging fire of desire within me. I couldn’t remember the reason I’d come here. I couldn’t even recall my own name.

I just wanted, wanted, and wanted.

My hands were pinned above my head by Alexander’s iron grasp, my nipples pebbled and hardened under his gaze, and my hips gyrated as Alexander rubbed my still-throbbing clitoris, edging me toward another orgasm with his masterful fingers.

I bit my lip so hard I tasted blood in a failed attempt to hold in a sob of pleasure.

I was so wet that the sheets beneath me felt damp.

I’d lost count of how many orgasms I’d had, and although I felt more than a little sensitive, I couldn’t help but spread my legs wider for him, my need for him only growing.

I wanted to rake my hands down the rigid muscles of his back. I wanted to kiss my way down his chest. Even though I wasn’t sure exactly how to, I wanted to wrap my lips around him and taste his arousal.

And even though we hadn’t exchanged a word since Alexander pushed me onto my back and pushed my legs apart, he knew it—and that was why he was keeping my hands pinned above me.

Because he delighted in taking away any illusion of control I might’ve had about the situation. There was only one person in control—him.

That shouldn’t have made me as aroused as it did. Alexander curled his fingers inside me and I gasped, the molten heat within me building to a peak. A throaty moan escaped my lips as Alexander moved his fingers, fucking me through my orgasm.

I choked on air, my body arching off the bed, my walls contracting around his fingers as the world went blissfully dark.

I came to as Alexander pulled his hand from me, those ice-cold eyes steady on mine as he licked my wetness off his fingers.

And just like that, I needed him again.

I jolted awake, my body aflame with desire from a vivid dream about the night before.

I was naked and alone in Alexander’s bed, my body pleasantly sore and achy, my cheeks burning hot.

Had…had I really done all of that?

Alexander sat at the small table in the side of the room, eating his breakfast without a care in the world.

I didn’t know what to say to him, so I just watched him eat. He handled his cutlery with almost as much expertise as he’d handled me the night before.

Goddess, what was I thinking of?

“You can stop staring any moment now,” Alexander said dryly, his gaze never leaving his plate.

Bury me. Just bury me now.

“Last night—” I began awkwardly, my cheeks burning, but before I could string my words together, Alexander interrupted me.

“Spare me your sentimental pleasantries, little rabbit. It was nothing special,” he said caustically, making a dismissive gesture with his hand. “You wanted revenge, and you got it. Now get out.”

It felt like Alexander had doused me with ice-cold water, freezing any intimacy that remained from the night before.

Of course he’d be like this.

The reality was that Alexander still hated me, and last night had been… interesting, but in the grand scheme of things, it was just a fluke that had helped me move closer to achieving my goal.

I was only using him to get my bonding ceremony today called off.

“Don’t worry, the feeling is mutual,” I said, matching Alexander’s flippant tone as I got out of his bed and picked up my discarded nightdress. “I don’t want anything to do with you, either, Alexander Hawthorne.”

When I opened the door to my room, Father was waiting for me.

His face was twisted with rage. The emerald-green eyes I’d inherited from him burned with ire. The door had barely closed when he slapped me so hard that I fell to the ground.

Usually, he preferred to hit me where no one could see the marks, even if literally everyone in the pack knew of his violent tendencies—he liked to keep up appearances.

The only thing that would make Father pissed enough to discard his normal rules would be if he knew about my night with Alexander.

Good.

Dylan hadn’t been in his room when I left Alexander’s, but if Father had found out so soon, then it was only a matter of time until he did as well.

“Do you have any idea what you’ve done?” Father spat with disgust and anger, a growl warping his voice. “You had one duty, just one, but you spread your legs for the wrong brother at the detriment of our pack?”

Our pack? I almost laughed.

What pack?

The Red Moon Pack that had socially ostracized me?

The pack that never let me participate in pack runs?

The pack that had looked the other way while Father and Drew, my younger half-brother and the future alpha of this pack, tormented me?

The pack whose members thought it was fun to bully me as a child, claiming I was clumsy until I learned how to defend myself?

That was the pack I was supposed to sacrifice my future for?

How silly.

The Red Moon Pack had never truly been my pack. It was a prison I’d been desperate to escape, until I’d been faced with an even worse fate—being Dylan’s mate.

I met Father’s gaze unflinchingly.

“I won’t be Dylan’s mate,” I announced.

Father’s jaw clenched, and faster than I could blink, he grabbed my hair and yanked me up, his lips curved into a vicious snarl.

“What the fuck did you just say to me, girl?”

I didn’t let myself show even a flicker of pain. I shoved down Lara’s whimper as Father’s alpha dominance pushed against us. I glared at Father, refusing to show any sign of weakness.

“You can hit me all you want, but I won’t mate with Dylan.”

I would not trade this prison for a more binding one.

I could run away from the Red Moon Pack once I had enough money hidden away to buy myself a place in a smaller, lesser-known pack, but if I mated with Dylan, there would be no escape. Wolves mated for life.

I refused to do that to myself.

“Do you think Alexander Hawthorne will choose you as his mate because you shamelessly threw yourself at him?” Father scoffed, his words dripping with derision. “That the Dark Alpha who rejected proposed mating alliances from every major pack would choose you?”

I nearly rolled my eyes. Of course I didn’t. Not even I was that delusional.

Besides, even if he wanted me, I wasn’t interested. At all.

“I don’t want to be Alexander’s mate, either,” I bit out, and Father looked like he was on the verge of hitting me again.

But to my surprise, he let go of me.

“Get ready for your bonding ceremony,” Father instructed, his face frighteningly calm.

“What?” I gaped at him. “Dylan will never agree to mate with me after he finds out that I was in his brother’s bed mere hours ago. You need to call off the engagement before he does.”

Father’s eyes narrowed.

“Was that why you did this? To force my hand and sabotage the alliance I’ve had in the works for years?”

My expression must have confirmed his suspicions, because Father growled and grabbed my arm so hard I knew it would leave bruises.

“You ungrateful whore.” He scowled. “This is what I get after all I’ve done for you?”

“All you’ve done for me?” I retorted, trying and failing to yank my hand out of his grip. I settled for meeting his gaze with the cocky smirk I knew he hated.

“Do you mean beating me within an inch of death for even the slightest mistake—hell, even mistakes I don’t make? Stop blaming me, because you are the one who betrayed your fated mate.”

I expected the slap this time. I threw my head back and laughed, despite the coppery taste of blood in my mouth. Father was so damn predictable.

I straightened, a smile on my lips.

“Go ahead, hit me again,” I said. “I’m not scared of you. You can’t make me throw away my future for your own selfish goals. If you want to be allied with the Hawthornes so bad, then fucking mate with Dylan yourself!”

Father hit me hard in the stomach, and I fell to my knees, gasping for air.

I knew he’d broken something because I couldn’t draw a full breath. Not that it mattered–thanks to the alpha blood in me, I’d be completely healed in half an hour at most.

My bedroom door opened, and I heard the soft pitter-patter of steps before I saw Elena and the two other maids, Gia and Diana, who’d been assigned to serve me during the preparations for my mating.

“Took you long enough.” Father gestured dismissively at me. “Get her dressed and ready for her bonding ceremony.”

I snarled at him.

“I said I’m not doing this!”

Father didn’t even look at me, his gaze boring into Elena instead.

“Make sure Eleanor understands that if she tries to get out of this, your heads will roll, as well as those of your families.”

My mouth went dry.

“You can’t do that,” I said, but even as I spoke, I knew it was a lie. Father would sacrifice anything and anyone to get what he wanted.

Father crouched to my height and took my chin in his hand, his green eyes cold and unfeeling.

“I will chain you to the fucking altar if that’s what it takes to secure this alliance,” he said roughly. “If you care about these people, whatever happened between you and Alexander will remain a secret until this alliance is finalized.”

Then he straightened and walked out of my room. Guards that hadn’t been there when I arrived closed the doors behind him.

There were more guards outside than he’d ever had watching me before.

Elena was at my side in seconds, her arms around me and her eyes wide with worry.

“Eleanor? Eleanor, what’s wrong?”

The sight of Elena’s face pinched with concern made me break down in tears for the first time in years.

“I made a mistake, Elena…a big one.”

I should’ve tried running away last night, even though pack security was so tight that I would’ve been caught.

Now it was too late. I was trapped.

Elena cupped my cheeks delicately, her kind brown eyes steadily holding mine.

“Look, Elena, I don’t know what happened between you and Dylan, but if this mating is no longer what you want, you shouldn’t stay for us. Alpha Derek is bluffing.”

That was a lie, and we both knew it.

Growing up, Elena was the only one by my side before I’d befriended Micah, who I couldn’t think about now without losing my cool.

Elena had always wanted a better life for me, and I knew she’d give her own life up in the blink of an eye to keep me safe. I never met my mother, so Elena was the closest thing I had to one.

“Thank you, Elena.” I hugged her, burying my head in her chest.

“Eleanor.” Elena ran her fingers down my back, comforting me like I was still a pup coming to meet her with my tears and bruises.

I had to protect her now, as well as Gia and Diana, whose only faults were being unlucky enough to be assigned to me.

I pulled away from the hug, pushing myself to my feet despite the pain racing through me.

“I want to get ready for my bonding ceremony.” My voice was stronger than I’d expected.

“Eleanor.” Elena’s voice was panicked, but I didn’t let myself look at her.

“Now, please. We don’t have much time left,” I said.

I didn’t shed any more tears as my ladies escorted me to the bathtub and scoured my body clean. I was completely numb as they dressed me up, applied my makeup, and did my hair.

I felt dead inside. Lara was curled into her protective mental cocoon. What sort of mating was this going to be?

The one where slowly but surely my mate would stifle me, and I would have to smile and ignore his whoring around while I bore his heirs.

My nails bit into the soft flesh of my palms so hard they drew blood, but the wounds closed almost immediately. Still, the pain was the only thing keeping me grounded.

I was doing this to save Elena. I couldn’t falter.

And then finally, we were done.

I didn’t look like a bride being forced to the altar. My dark blond hair was pulled away from my face and cascaded down my back in soft waves, and my forest-green dress highlighted my sage-green eyes that looked like a watered-down version of Father’s.

Elena pressed a kiss to my forehead and took my hand. I almost broke down in tears again, but a knock on the door brought us back to reality.

Dylan walked in without waiting for permission to enter.

“I would like some privacy with my mate,” he told my ladies. Elena seemed like she was about to argue, but I caught her eye and nodded.

Elena hesitated, but then after squeezing my hand, she left with Gia and Diana, and I was alone with Dylan.

“You’re stunning,” Dylan said in an almost awed tone.

I stood up from my dressing table to face my groom.

He looked good. His long black hair, so similar to Alexander’s, was pulled back from his face. With his attire perfectly tailored to him, he struck an imposing but benevolent figure.

Lara bared her canines at him mentally, and I did my best to remind her that if I clawed off his face, Father would kill Elena.

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

Dylan smiled tentatively, his mask of niceness that I’d gullibly fallen for back in place.

“I’m glad you chose to give us another chance,” he said softly, and I almost snorted.

Give us another chance?

What in the Abyss had he smoked that had enabled him to forget that he’d threatened me into staying engaged to him?

Dylan closed the distance between us and took my hands in his, a slight tremble running through him and…were those tears in his eyes?

“I know an apology isn’t nearly enough, but I’m sorry for last night. I wasn’t thinking straight.”

Dylan hadn’t been drunk yesterday. I would have scented it on him while he almost choked me to death.

He had been thinking perfectly straight—just like I had been when I fucked his brother.

I didn’t say anything, though. I simply pulled my hands from his grasp.

Dylan’s expression fell slightly, but then he mustered up another smile.

“I love you, Eleanor. I know we can build a life together. Please leave the past behind us so we can focus on our future.”

What future?

Even if he had to cheat on me, why Micah? I had just one friend, and he’d taken her from me, along with any hopes I had of a happy mating.

And now he loved me? I wanted to scream at him, but I knew the moment I started to talk, everything would come spewing out, and Father would hurt Elena.

So I remained silent.

Dylan’s expression shifted.

“Eleanor—”

“I need to finish getting ready for the bonding ceremony,” I interrupted him, before he said something that would trigger Lara into attacking him.

Dylan nodded, somewhat reluctantly.

“Of course. We’ll have a lifetime to discuss this,” he said, leaning in to kiss my cheek. Then he was gone.

I scrubbed at my cheek with the sleeve of my dress, fighting the urge to break something.

A lifetime together?

Oh, Goddess. I wasn’t strong enough to do this.

But I had no other choice.

So I let the guards escort me to the sacred patch of woods where most of our ceremonies were held in the Red Moon Pack.

And as I walked, I found myself thinking of Alexander. I could already imagine the smug look on his face when he realized my plans had failed epically, and I scowled.

Thankfully, I was fairly certain he wouldn’t be at this event, since he’d not attended any of the other ceremonies leading up to this one, even though he was here to represent his and Dylan’s father, Alpha Maximus.

I thought of Micah, my best friend, my partner in crime, my ride or die, who’d betrayed me so deeply, and my chest hurt.

I’d been avoiding thinking of her because I knew I’d be devastated once the fact that our friendship was over really hit me.

How could she do that to me? I hadn’t wanted to listen to Dylan’s side of the story, but I realized that I wanted to hear Micah’s.

Maybe I wanted her to lie to me and tell me Dylan had forced himself on her, even though I’d seen her be an active participant. I just wanted her to say anything at all that wouldn’t mean our whole friendship had been a lie.

Pathetic. I know.

We reached the clearing, which was teeming with pack members from Red Moon and Nightshade who were there to bear witness to my union with Dylan.

The entire clearing fell silent as I stood next to my groom.

As I suspected, Alexander was nowhere to be found, but Micah sat in the front row, wearing a shade of green that was similar to mine, a pleasant smile on her face as though last night hadn’t happened.

I looked away from her, refusing to let my emotions show under Father’s eagle-eyed gaze.

Our pack’s priest began the rites.

“There is no bond as sacred as that between a mated pair, and today we are gathered to witness one of…”

I couldn’t look at Dylan next to me. My mind was blank except for the thought that these might be my last moments of freedom. My chest tightened almost painfully, but I tried to push the growing feeling of being trapped from my mind.

“Step forward,” the pack’s priest commanded, his voice hoarse.

We stepped forward, and his milky gray eyes locked onto Dylan first.

“Dylan Hawthorne, under the gaze of the Moon Goddess and her people as witnesses, do you accept Eleanor Ashford, daughter of the alpha of the Red Moon Pack, as your mate and future luna?” he rasped.

Dylan didn’t hesitate before nodding.

“I do.”

It felt like the world was closing in around me. My breaths came too fast and my vision narrowed.

After the affirmations, we would mark each other and be bound to each other…forever.

Those milky gray eyes shifted to me.

“Eleanor Ashford, under the gaze of the Moon Goddess and her people as witnesses, do you accept Dylan Hawthorne, alpha heir and successor of the Nightshade Pack, as your mate?”

My throat closed up.

“I…” I stuttered. “I…”

“Stop!”

Everyone in the clearing turned to look at the source of the interrupting growl.

I followed their gazes to see Alexander walking toward me, his light blue eyes not cold and detached as usual, but burning with so much emotion that I couldn’t look away from him. Lara unfurled within me, as entranced as I was.

“Brother,” Dylan gritted out. “What are you doing here?”

Alexander ignored him, his gaze never leaving mine as he closed the distance between us and pulled me into his arms.

I jumped, completely surprised, bracing myself with my hands on Alexander’s broad chest.

“Alexander, what—” I began to ask, but my voice cut off when Alexander fisted my hair, making a mess of the waves Elena had styled earlier, and bared my neck to him.

A slight tremble ran through me. Surely he wasn’t?—

Alexander bit down hard on my neck, marking me as his mate.

I gasped, a feeling unlike any other racing through me—a feeling of completion, fulfillment, and so much euphoria that Lara howled within me.

Alexander retracted his canines, sealing my wound shut with a precise stroke of his tongue that made my toes curl from the pleasure that flooded my veins. My gasp morphed into a moan as Lara took over to mark our mate.

And just like that, I felt our bond snap into place.

Our bond wasn’t like anything I’d imagined it would be. It felt like I’d been floating and lost, and then suddenly I had a tether. Not one that restrained me, but one that linked me to a companion.

And on the other side of that tether was Alexander.

I opened my eyes and stared into Alexander’s, feeling completely enthralled.

Had his eyes always been so beautiful? And that face, Goddess, he was?—

“What have you done?” Dylan growled, interrupting my reverie. His eyes burned black as he advanced threateningly toward my mate.

Alexander’s hand fell to the small of my back, a silent reassurance. Under different circumstances, I would’ve marveled at this complete change in his behavior, but all I could think of now was Dylan giving us some privacy so I could jump my mate’s bones.

Wait. What?

No. That wasn’t me; those were Lara’s thoughts. The marking had given her too much dominance, enough that she was at the forefront of my mind, and there was only one thing she wanted—her mate.

“I thought it would be obvious,” Alexander deadpanned in response to Dylan’s outburst. “I claimed Eleanor as my mate.”

“How dare you?” Dylan’s wolf was gaining dominance now, and I would’ve been concerned if I wasn’t busy mentally wrestling with my own wolf. “Eleanor is mine! We’ve been engaged for years!”

Alexander shrugged indifferently, his thumb moving in circles on my lower back and winding up Lara even more.

“I was carrying out my duty to do right by her, seeing as we spent the night together and I took her maidenhead.”

Maidenhead ? Who the hell still used words like that?

The wind went right out of Dylan’s sails, and murmurs broke out across the clearing.

“That’s not true.” Dylan sounded like he was trying to convince himself. He turned to me with so much hope in his eyes that I almost felt pity for him. “Right, Eleanor?”

I finally had Lara under control, but I didn’t respond to Dylan.

My silence must have spoken volumes, because the fury that suddenly flooded Dylan’s face reminded me of how he’d looked last night when he choked me.

Alexander tugged me behind him, protecting me from his brother, but he shouldn’t have bothered.

Dylan didn’t move toward us. Instead, he lunged toward the rapt audience and pulled Micah from her seat.

Then, keeping his gaze on me, he bit her, marking her as his mate.