Chapter 19

CHAPTER 19

ELEANOR

I was drowning.

Drowning under waves of anger, confusion, and a deep-seated fear that today would be the day I lost him.

My mate.

An image of Alexander flashed through my mind: hair as dark as night, stormy ocean blue eyes I could drown in, lips I longed to feel against mine, and a body that could drive a woman to sin.

Alexander, with his cutting words and contradictorily gentle actions.

My mate, who’d hidden so much from me. Who’d apparently altered my memory, as crazy as that sounded. My mate, who had a lot to answer for, but to whom I wanted to apologize.

I had to get to him.

But first, I needed to survive this.

“I have your penchant for desiring men who aren’t yours to thank for my freedom.” Micah’s smile was as vicious as it was sweet. “Anastasia sends her regards.”

The door shut ominously behind her as she stepped into my small cell.

Anastasia had set Micah free. I doubted it was out of goodwill.

“Now, it’s just you and me,” Micah crooned, a familiar glint in her eyes. “Just like old times.”

The last time I’d seen that look on her face was the night before my bonding ceremony.

The night everything had gone to hell.

It felt like an entire lifetime had passed since then, not just a handful of months.

But unlike that night, I could read that look. Micah had made her decision.

She was here to kill me.

“Micah, please—” I started, but she didn’t let me finish.

“Did you know my grandfather was the wolf your grandfather deposed to steal his position of alpha?”

The shock that raced through me was almost enough to shatter my concentration as I subtly tested the give of the silver manacles around my wrists and my eyes assessed the length of my chains.

Micah tilted her head to the side, her gaze bitter and distant as she spoke.

“Some days when I listened to a lucky bastard complain about how shitty her privileged life was, I wondered what could have been if my grandfather had won that challenge. If my inheritance had been something other than a failed bloodline.”

So our entire friendship had been a lie from the beginning. However, instead of betrayal, I felt…pity.

How lonely must it have been for Micah to be so caught up in her own bitterness and resentment that she could never let anyone in?

“I never knew that,” I whispered. “I’m sorry.”

Micah’s expression didn’t change. She was so lost in her memories I didn’t think she even heard me.

“I envied you. Hated you. Hated watching you whine about the life I wanted.” Her lower lip trembled, her voice shaking. “I hated the way you pretended we were friends while you stole the life I should have had.”

I took a step forward, making the chains rattle, and Micah’s gaze settled on me.

“I always saw you as a friend, Micah. Always,” I said carefully.

I wasn’t just trying to buy time. It was the truth.

I met Micah’s gaze silently, willing her to see my sincerity.

For a moment, Micah paused. In that moment of hesitation, a thousand memories passed between us.

A pink Band-Aid on my knee, Micah’s soft laughter when I tackled her to the ground, Micah and I hanging off the side of my bed giggling late into the night as we talked about the boys we liked and what our future would be like.

Micah’s hand fell to her belly, and her gaze hardened.

The moment of hesitation passed.

“My child will live the life of luxury I never could.” Mania crept into Micah’s voice as her hand left the folds of her flowing dress, revealing an elegant silver dagger in her grasp. “I will rule as the luna of the Nightshade Pack alongside Dylan, and you…you will never steal anything from me ever again.”

I tensed, steadying myself.

With the silver chains, not only was my range of movement limited, but I couldn’t shift or take strength from my wolf.

But I wouldn’t die without a fight.

Since she was pregnant, Micah couldn’t shift either.

Micah drifted closer, her footsteps barely a whisper against the stone floors.

I shuffled back, my look of terror only slightly feigned.

One misstep and I was dead.

Micah stepped into my personal space, her hand poised to stab the dagger into my heart.

I swung with all my strength, knocking the dagger out of her grasp. Micah gasped in shock, blindly reaching for the fallen dagger, but I was faster.

I picked up the dagger.

Micah froze as our gazes locked.

In one movement, I could kill her.

I had enough reason to. She’d betrayed me. She’d tried to kill me three times now.

The blade trembled in my grasp.

And I found that I…I couldn’t do it.

Not with the memories of our past hovering so close that I could have touched them.

Not when Micah was pregnant with an innocent child who had nothing to do with this.

Micah saw my hesitation, and her eyes went wide with disbelief.

It happened fast. These things often do.

I heard the dull clang of metal, and Micah gasped.

Both our gazes fell to her chest and the silver blade that protruded from it.

A strangled sound tore out of me as her assailant pulled the silver out of Micah’s chest and sliced open her throat.

Warm flecks of blood spattered across my cheeks. The dagger fell from my limp fingers as my old best friend fell to the cold hard floor, her eyes wide and unseeing, her hand still on her pregnant belly.

I couldn’t move. Couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t look away from Micah’s fallen body, a scream trapped in my throat.

“You’re weaker than I thought,” Anastasia said as she wiped the blood off her dagger. “She tried to kill you three times, but you still hesitated.”

“You killed her,” I said uselessly, as though both of us didn’t already know that.

I was still in shock, processing what I’d just seen. This was the first time I’d seen someone I’d known die.

Micah was…Micah was gone. Forever.

“Did I?” Anastasia asked as she retrieved Micah’s fallen dagger. “Luna Micah escaped from her cell in an attempt to assassinate the woman her mate had chosen over her. In the process, both she-wolves fought and died tragically.”

I barely registered that Anastasia had just admitted she was going to kill me too, and frame Micah for it.

Anastasia and Alexander had a relationship. If she was here, then he still had a chance.

“Dylan…Dylan intends to betray Alexander and kill him,” I said, not caring that my voice rang with desperation. “You need to warn him.”

Anastasia twirled her dagger as she moved closer to me, carefully staying out of my reach.

“Dylan will never win a fight against Alexander.” She shrugged.

She had a point. Dylan would never win a fair fight against Alexander. But what if it wasn’t a fair fight?

Anastasia’s cool blade bit into the skin of my neck, and I didn’t even realized she’d moved this close.

“For what it’s worth,” she said from behind me, her voice lazy and reassured. “This is nothing personal.”

A lightbulb went off in my head as I realized what she was doing.

This is nothing personal.

“You think killing me will break Alexander’s curse.”

Anastasia’s hold on me wavered, the blade moving slightly away from my neck.

“How do you know about the curse? Did Alexander?—”

I headbutted her, feeling her nose break as I took advantage of her distraction, simultaneously smacking the dagger out of her hand.

Anastasia growled, diving to pick it up. Knowing I couldn’t reach it before her, I kicked it right through the bars and out of my cell, then lunged for Anastasia.

Anastasia stumbled back, blood running down her nose as she backed away from my silver chains, palming her second dagger.

I settled into a fighting stance even though I knew I couldn’t win against Anastasia, who was a terrific warrior who still had access to her wolf.

“I don’t intend to die here,” I said evenly. “Now, we can either fight and waste valuable time, or we can get out of here and help Alexander.”

Anastasia blinked, her eyebrows climbing high.

“Did you really think I’d fall for that?” The edges of her lips curled into a mocking smile. “If you care about Alexander so much, why don’t you just stay still and die?” she rasped, and then she launched herself at me.

I scrambled back, ignoring the burn of the chains as I moved, using them to block Anastasia’s attacks.

I couldn’t move very quickly while I was hampered by the silver, but Anastasia couldn’t come any closer to me without getting burned by the long silver chains. We settled into a deadly game of tag.

Stab, block. Stab, block.

My breath came in harsh gasps. If I kept up this defense, I’d be tired soon…and then I’d be dead.

What had West always said during training?

When in doubt, feint and run like hell.

I couldn’t run now, but I could make a feint.

I let my movements lag, exaggerating my fatigue.

Anastasia closed in for the kill, but I moved faster, hitting her across the face with a length of the silver chain.

Anastasia fell back, a curse on her lips and a red welt on the side of her face.

“Does Alexander really have less than two months left?” I asked, both curious and hoping to distract her.

Anastasia circled me warily, but her gaze held a touch of distraction.

“I can’t believe he told you,” she rasped, her voice low and pained. “I was at his side for years, yet he cut me out of his life and chose you over me.”

I didn’t bother correcting her. Seeing her at that moment, something hit me.

“You love him,” I said.

Anastasia’s gaze flicked to mine, but she didn’t deny it.

“It doesn’t matter,” she spat out, and suddenly there was a dull thud above us.

Anastasia glanced away for a moment, and I launched myself at her, kicking her feet out from under her—or at least I would have, if she hadn’t turned at the last moment and placed her blade above my heart.

Her eyes were ice-cold as she spoke.

“I will stay at his side long after you’re gone, like I have all this time, and eventually Alexander will see me. I know it.”

The blade tore through my shirt, pricked my skin—and fell out of Anastasia’s limp grasp.

My jaw dropped as Anastasia fell to the ground, Seraphina standing behind her with a brick in her hands.

Seraphina dropped the brick before patting down Anastasia, presumably looking for a key.

“I know you know everything,” Seraphina said as she searched, her voice heavy with regret and urgency. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. Father swore us all to secrecy, and Alexander wanted it to stay that way.”

Her eyes met mine, silently begging me to understand.

“I just wanted both of you to be happy for the few months he had left.”

My heart clenched painfully as I thought of how difficult it must’ve been for her to keep this from me, especially when I’d come asking for answers.

Seraphina found the key.

The moment she unlocked my chains, I pulled her into a hug.

“I understand,” I whispered. “I do.”

Seraphina relaxed into my hug, a sigh of relief leaving her. “Thank you.”

She pulled away quickly.

“You need to go. West has the guards distracted for now, but they’ll be back at any moment,” Seraphina said, a strength in her gaze that reminded me of her brother. “I’ve got this.”

I left, hearing the click of chains behind me as Seraphina chained Anastasia up in my place.

I was out of the dungeons in seconds, the guards gone as Seraphina had promised.

I ran, hoping against all odds that I would make it to Alexander in time to prevent what Dylan was planning.

For the first time, I actively reached for the mate bond between Alexander and me.

With a tug, it unfolded in my mind.

Before it had felt like a slender but resilient rope between us, and now it had evolved into a path.

A path that I couldn’t turn away from now that I’d seen it—a path that led straight to Alexander’s mind, which he’d currently walled off from me.

Following it, I headed to the northern border, where the troops had been deployed.

Please be fine. Please be fine.

I didn’t know how long I ran. It could have been minutes or hours. Time slipped through my fingers like sand.

Then I saw it—a cluster of tents in the Nightshade Pack’s colors, smoke from cooking fires, and the din of people.

I began to move toward the tents, only to halt several feet away from the camp.

The mate bond was tugging me in the opposite direction.

Alexander wasn’t at the camp.

Cold fear flooded my veins. Was I already too late?

No. No.

Turning around, I followed the mate bond, my heart racing so fast I could barely breathe.

The overpowering stench of blood and death hit me, and my knees buckled at the sight before me.

I’d run right into a massive valley that might have been beautiful once, but not anymore. Not with the bodies carelessly strewn about, some whole, others in pieces, their blood and innards splattered across the grass.

Alexander stood in the center of the carnage, bloody and fearsome, with his claws at Dylan’s throat.

A sigh of relief ripped from me as their voices reached me in the deathly quiet of the valley.

“You never deserved any of it. Not the alpha position. Not Eleanor,” Dylan spat out venomously, his face contorted with hatred.

I couldn’t see Alexander’s expression from where I stood, but the compassion in his voice drew me up short.

“I don’t want to hurt you, brother,” he said softly.

Dylan’s expression darkened further.

“You are no brother of mine,” he growled.

Alexander’s hand lashed out, but not with enough force to kill him. Dylan fell out of his grasp, unconscious.

I felt an intense surge of relief that almost bowled me over.

We had less than two months left together, but it didn’t matter. Alexander was fine, and he was right in front of me.

“Alexander,” I called out with a voice that was shakier than I would’ve liked.

Alexander froze, and then, very slowly, he turned around.

Those ocean-blue eyes latched onto mine, his disbelief palpable.

“Eleanor?”

I closed the distance between us and leaped into his arms, tears blurring my vision.

Alexander caught me easily, cradling me in his arms. He buried his fingers in my hair to hold me even closer as he inhaled my scent, a slight tremble racing through him.

Through the mate bond, I felt the wall blocking me from his mind waver for a moment, and nothing could have prepared me for the influx of emotions that hit me.

Betrayal, pain, and…love. So much love that I wondered how I’d ever doubted it.

I saw myself as he saw me.

My blond hair was drenched with water from the pool, my dark green eyes locked onto his, a tentative smile on my lips as we pressed up against each other, hiding from Elena.

I saw myself arguing with Alexander, saw myself asleep in his sheets, a soft snore escaping me.

I saw myself in the many little moments we’d shared, and every time, one thing remained constant: the way Alexander’s heart ached with love as he watched me.

The way his heart bled with so much emotion that I wondered how anyone could feel that deeply without losing their mind.

Beyond that, I saw a darkness that made my chest feel ice-cold. The darkness seemed to look back at me and?—

Alexander ended our hug abruptly, his mental wall sliding firmly back into place as an annoyed scowl twisted his mouth.

“You shouldn’t be here,” he snarled caustically, his mask of cold indifference showing no hint of what I’d just seen in his mind.

Goddess, all this time I’d never seen beyond that mask. I’d taken it all at face value.

Alexander hadn’t saved me repeatedly because of his sense of responsibility. He’d done it because he…he loved me.

Alexander was still speaking, his voice as frosty as ever.

“I will have a warrior escort you back?—”

I cut him off with a kiss, and Alexander froze.

Alexander pulled away, breaking the kiss, confusion igniting in his eyes.

“Eleanor—” he began, but I didn’t let him finish. I had so much to say, and I’d be damned if I let him continue to lie to me.

“I—” I started, but my words died in my throat as I noticed Dylan less than a foot behind Alexander, his hands raised and a chipped silver sword in his grasp. He was going to stab Alexander in the back, even after his brother had spared his life.

That moment felt like forever as I shoved Alexander out of the way, only to feel a piercing pain in my chest.

Dylan’s eyes widened in horror, his momentum carrying him all the way forward as he buried the sword in me to the hilt.

I couldn’t breathe.

“No, no…” Dylan gasped, his hands still around the sword’s hilt.

He pulled the sword out of me in a misplaced attempt to salvage his mistake.

My knees gave out, as if the sword had been the only thing keeping me standing.

My world slowed as I fell to the ground. I’d never felt anything as vividly as I did in those moments.

Alexander’s howl of pain and anger tore through the air, and I felt the wall in his mind detonate as an all-encompassing wave of fury crested through our bond.

I heard a sickening crunch as he snapped his brother’s neck.

Even if I hadn’t seen his lifeless body drop to the ground, I knew with an awful certainty that Dylan was dead…like I would be soon.

My wound wasn’t healing. There were too many pieces of silver lodged within me from the chipped sword.

It hurt to breathe. It hurt to not breathe.

It hurt to just exist. The wetness on my chest rapidly spread, drenching my clothes in a matter of seconds.

Alexander was instantly at my side, putting pressure on my injury.

“Eleanor,” he said desperately, his gaze dark and desperate, with no sign of his usual detachment. “Little rabbit, stay with me.”

Goddess, I still hated that nickname.

I laughed, or at least I tried to, but I choked on my own blood as my world grayed around the edges.

“I…I…” I tried speak, but forming words was harder than I remembered.

Alexander’s gaze darkened further and he trembled as if he were a child, his fear zinging through our bond.

“Save your strength,” he demanded. “The healers are almost here.”

I knew they wouldn’t get here in time. Despite Alexander putting pressure on my wound, my strength was diminishing with every breath I took.

I had to tell him. I wanted him to know.

“I… I remember…” The words were painful to get out, and I tasted my blood as I spoke. “The pool…you saved me.”

Alexander’s breathing stalled as realization set in.

Tears filled those beautiful blue eyes, and his next words were a plea.

“No, Eleanor, please?—”

I’d never seen Alexander cry before. Before today, I didn’t even think it was possible.

“T-the curse… Dylan said—” My words were cut off by a sudden, intense coughing bout that made blood spill over my lips. “Time…I wish we had more…”

Alexander’s tears felt warm against my cool skin as he insisted that I save my strength. I heard his mental bellows through the pack link as he called out for help.

My chest felt like it had caved in from the inside. My entire left side was drenched in blood.

I couldn’t feel my hands and toes anymore.

“I…I love you,” I whispered, but Alexander heard it, and his gaze went wild with panic.

“No, you don’t,” he growled, pulling me into his arms as though if he held me tight enough, I would stay. “I forbid it. You hate me, and you have your entire life ahead of you. The physicians?—”

My head dropped against his chest, my neck unable to bear its weight anymore.

“It’s…cold.”

I heard Alexander yell my name, but it felt distant, and my eyes refused to stay open.

Then everything went dark and blissfully silent.