Chapter 22

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

Orla stroked her hands across his chest and shoulders; he was so gloriously strong. She couldn’t believe this was happening. Two days ago, she was happy because she’d managed to have a dance with Shay. Now they were about to make love on his dining table and not because she’d persuaded and coerced him to do it, but because he loved her, because he’d always loved her. Tears pricked her eyes again because she was so damned happy right now, she felt like she could burst.

She pulled back slightly and he stroked her face. She caught his hand and pressed a kiss to his palm. Then she shuffled back, tugging on his hand to follow her. He climbed up on to the table and she lay down. He crawled up her, placing a kiss on her stomach, trailing his hot mouth up towards her heart where he lingered lovingly before moving over her and kissing her softly on the mouth. She stroked the back of his head.

He pulled back, grabbed the cushion and gently lifted her head, placing the cushion underneath. She smiled with love for him.

He pulled a condom from the box, ripped it open and then looked back at her. ‘You still doing OK?’

She smiled and nodded.

He moved back over her, and she wrapped her legs around him and with his eyes on hers, he moved carefully inside her. He let out a groan of need as he sank deeper inside her. ‘Orla, I love you, I love you so damned much.’

She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him and he started moving gently against her. She knew it was cowardly, but she couldn’t say it back. She wanted to trust in him, she wanted to believe this would be forever, but her poor damaged heart was too scared to go all in yet. If she didn’t say it out loud it felt like she was protecting herself.

Every movement was slow and exquisite, somehow making her feel things she’d never felt from another man. She loved how much care he was taking with her as well, even after all this time. He was always such a gentleman. And while she didn’t mind sex that was fast and hard, he was probably right that she needed to take it easy after the accident. Besides, slow, gentle sex with the man she loved was utterly wonderful.

He moved his mouth to her neck and she stroked a hand through his hair, gasping at the feel of his hot mouth on her skin. She had dreamed about doing this again with him and it was already far surpassing any fantasies she’d had about him. He stroked a hand across her breast and she felt that feeling coiling in her stomach, that tightening that ignited every nerve, every cell of her body, as he took her higher and higher. She clung to him as she soared, shouting out his name and she felt him fall over the edge too. He collapsed down on top of her, his breath heavy against her neck. Then he pushed back to look at her and she could see the love he had for her in his eyes and although she didn’t say the words, she knew she still loved this man and impossibly, after their conversation and after this, she’d fallen in love with him a little bit more.

Orla was lying sprawled out on top of Shay’s chest as he ran his fingers up and down her back. They’d lay on top of his table for a while after they’d made love, just kissing and stroking each other, rediscovering each other’s bodies after all this time. Then they’d made it back up to his bed where he’d made love to her again. She couldn’t be any more blissfully happy than she was right now.

She looked up at Shay and smiled when she saw his face reflecting her own happiness. He looked at her and gave her a sweet kiss.

‘I can’t believe we’re here after all this time,’ Orla said.

‘I know, I can’t believe it took us a near-death experience to get us here.’

‘Yeah, we really needed an honest conversation before now. I read all these romance books where I get really infuriated by the characters not talking to each other, as it would save them a lot of heartache. But in reality, people never do – they protect themselves, deal with hurt by running away from it, avoid confrontation as much as possible, they never have the big chat. Maybe those books I read are closer to reality than I thought.’

‘In my defence, I did try to have that conversation with you when you came back, that night on the beach when I told you I’d had counselling. But then you said you hadn’t loved me, you were young and confusing the emotions of sex with love and that you only loved me as a friend.’

‘Oh god, I was trying to save face, make things less awkward between us. If you didn’t think you’d broken my heart then we could be friends again without you creeping around me feeling bad for me.’

He stroked her face. ‘I get it, I do. But if I’d told you I loved you that night, would you have given me a second chance?’

‘Back then? Probably not. I’d carried that hurt with me for six years. I don’t think I could have thrown myself into your arms, I had to learn to trust you again. Maybe we needed this time to grow.’

‘Maybe.’

She shuffled up him and cupped his face. ‘None of this is your fault. You can blame your parents for all this. They made you believe you weren’t worth loving. People like that should never be allowed to have children. But I’m very glad they did, because I get to have the most incredible man I’ve ever known in my life.’

He smiled and she kissed him.

She pulled back and looked out the window. It was dark outside, but the snow had stopped falling, though it was still covering the ground like a glittering blanket.

‘What time is it?’

Shay checked his watch. ‘Just gone five.’

‘I feel like I’m losing all track of time since the accident, I don’t even know what day it is?’

‘Monday, 22 nd December.’

She snuggled into his neck and then sat up. ‘The boat parade. We were going to go.’

‘Theo will understand if we don’t. If you’re too tired, we can stay here.’

‘I’d like to go.’

‘We can still go. It doesn’t start until seven. We’ve got time.’

She grinned. ‘Time for what?’

‘Well, we should probably have a shower.’

‘Together?’

‘Is there any other way?’