Chapter 18

Emmy sat with her back against the rough stone of their shelter, its jagged edges sharp through the fabric of her uniform. The wind howled across the narrow opening in the rock, hot and gritty, the curtain of driving sand trapping them inside. A storm of equal proportion raged inside Emmy's mind. Chigs's confession was more disorienting than the crash had been.

He thinks I'm his mate?

She couldn't deny that her heart yearned to accept his love. Yet fear whispered insidious doubts. She'd been burned by Dafari's betrayal, then razed again by Mek's obliviousness. Each wound had calloused her heart a little more.

As a psychologist, she was trained to compartmentalize and view her patients' situations objectively. Yet here she was, drowning in a tumultuous sea of her own vulnerability. If someone came to her with a similar dilemma, what advice would she give?

"Emmy, did you hear what I said?" Chigs's voice sounded strained. He looked disheveled from the storm, his dark hair a wild mess. Sand clung to his beard. Was he another emotional time bomb waiting to detonate? Or could he be the partner she'd always longed for, someone she could trust implicitly?

Emmy licked her lips, tasting grit. Her heart yearned for this gorgeous, honorable male kneeling before her now, sincerity burning in his copper eyes.

But her mind screamed for self-preservation. Don't be fooled again! You trusted before and look what it cost you.

She exhaled a shaky breath, tugging at her cloak of professional objectivity. "I heard you, yes. But I'm afraid this is just you reacting to stress."

"No, it's not, Emmy. I can't stop thinking about you." His copper gaze didn't waver.

At least it was gratifying to know she hadn't been alone in her obsession, but that didn't mean they were mates for life. He was most likely experiencing a classic case of cold feet now that they were so near his goal of finding the denaidan women where his true future—and mate—lay.

Emmy chewed her bottom lip, trying to see things from outside her own emotions. "I think your feelings are probably arising from transference," she said.

His eyes narrowed. "What's transference?"

"It's a common phenomenon between doctors and their patients. It's when feelings about someone in your past are subconsciously projected onto your therapist." She spoke with all the zeal of a first-year psychology student, despite the denial in her heart. "But the emotions aren't real."

"First of all, you're not my therapist," Chigs pointed out. "Second, I know now that my dream was guiding me to you all along." He chuckled dryly and shook his head. "Ellam Cua is probably laughing right now over my misinterpretation. I want to save these denaidan women, but the actual goal Ellam Cua intended me to reach was you."

Emmy swallowed, trying to suppress the flutter in her stomach, the ache in her chest. He thinks the dream was about me. Past betrayals played again through her consciousness. She wanted Chigs far more than she'd ever wanted any of them. Yet how could she trust herself to recognize love now when it had betrayed her so cruelly before?

"I want to believe you, Chigs. More than anything." She shook her head. "But I can't. Not after what I went through with Dafari and other lovers."

Chigs reached out, engulfing her small hands in his larger, calloused ones. "I'm not them, Emmy. What we have is real, tangible. This isn't some scientific mumbo-jumbo. It isn't a fleeting infatuation or lustful diversion. I will never choose another, even if you reject me." His thumb stroked over her knuckles in a soothing caress that sent shivers right to her core. "You are my destiny."

Emmy suddenly realized she was being a coward. She'd come to trust Chigs deeply, and knew, without a shred of doubt, that he would never intentionally hurt her. His loyalty, his unflinching integrity—those qualities had captivated her as surely as his striking eyes and powerful physique. He was worthy of her trust, of her heart, if she could find the courage.

Releasing her hands, Chigs stood, his broad frame stooped beneath the low rock ceiling. "But if you don't feel the same, I won't pressure you. Just know that I'll be waiting. Always."

His offer of space felt like a stopper had just been pulled from the bottle of her emotions, dissipating the storm within her. She glanced at the curtain of sand, realizing how close they'd come to death in that crash. She didn't want to die, never knowing what it was to be truly loved.

Before he could move away, Emmy reached up and took his hand again. "Wait." Her voice caught on the lump in her throat, but she found the courage to push past it. "I think… I want to take that chance. On us."

Chigs was motionless for a handful of heartbeats, his fingers curled around hers. Then, with a low rumbling growl, he swept her up into his arms and captured her lips in a searing kiss. Emmy gasped at the ferocity of his embrace, instinctively opening for the questing stroke of his tongue. She clung to his shoulders, fingers tangling in the long hair at the nape of his neck as her desire burst into flames.

His large hands roamed over her body with possessive urgency, calloused pads leaving trails of delicious friction through the thin fabric of her shirt. When his fingers found the soft swell of her breast, she arched into his touch with a ragged gasp.

Panting harshly, Chigs murmured against her tingling lips, "You are my unqu akhala, my heart's choice."

Emmy's hands trembled as she traced her fingers through the rough beard covering his jaw. "Yes," she whispered fervently. "Yours."

They kissed passionately until they were both left panting. Her hands struggled with the fastening on the front of his uniform, palms sliding under the fabric against his skin.

"Let me see you, akhala." He helped her shrug out of her uniform shirt and bra, his gaze devouring every newly exposed inch of flushed skin. Emmy felt powerful and cherished.

He nuzzled the slender column of her neck, his deft fingers plucking at her nipples until they peaked into aching points. Heat bloomed in Emmy's core, and she rocked her hips against his solid length, seeking friction, craving that intimate connection. "Chigs, please..."

He growled against the throbbing pulse at her throat. "Patience, akhala. Let me worship you properly first."

Removing his shirt, he laid it on the soft sand like a blanket in the middle of the cave before lowering her onto it and resuming his attention.

His lips trailed lower, nibbling her collarbone before blazing a molten path between the valley of her breasts. When he closed his mouth over one tight peak, Emmy cried out, voice lost to the storm as warm wet heat pulsed between her thighs.

She slid her hand down the hard planes of his chest, seeking the stiff rod of his arousal where it pressed along her hip. He felt enormous, straining against his pants, long and hard. She fumbled at the closure of his waistband, but he pulled away, tugging her pants and panties off in what felt like one deft sweep of his arm. His palms were like brands against her skin as he knelt between her thighs and pressed them open, pausing only long enough for her to see the glint of passion in his eyes before he delved toward her center.

Her world narrowed to an electric jolt of pleasure as his mouth claimed her sex in a sensual, penetrating kiss. His beard scratched the tender flesh of her inner thighs, adding to the sensation, and she cried out again, bucking upward. He grabbed her ass, holding her against him like he was devouring a feast. The broad swirls of his tongue over her clit alternated with deep penetrating thrusts that brought her to the edge of climax and tumbled her over into ecstasy.

Mindless with bliss, she rode the wave of pleasure, his mouth never stopping until her body stopped convulsing. She floated in a hazy, lust-soaked delirium, half conscious of Chigs shedding his pants before climbing on top of her, one heavy thigh pressed against the slickness between her legs. The hot, thick line of his cock rested against her hip bone, pulsing as if in time to a heartbeat.

He leaned close to her ear, his breath hot against her skin. "Last chance to change your mind, akhala. There will be no turning back after this."

Her fingers curled into the soft sand as she opened her eyes to lock gazes with him, his heavy-lidded eyes dark with passion. "I want you, Chigs."

Satisfaction lit his features, and he shifted, placing the broad head of his member against her opening. She was slick and ready, widening her legs to accept him. With excruciating purpose, he pushed into her, stretching her until she was panting with a pleasure that verged on pain. She clawed his back, needing him more than she'd ever needed anyone or anything in her entire existence.

"Chigs, please…" She wrapped her ankles around his hard backside and pulled him deep inside her, gasping as his hips settled against hers and his cock filled her completely.

He groaned. "My Emmy."

Kissing her with an urgent passion, he began to rock, stroking in and out in an increasing rhythm that made her insides flutter and an orgasm rise within her once again. Over and over, he drove into her, his huge body covering hers. All she could do was try not to drown as a tsunami of sensation carried her up, up, up, then rolled her over in a wave of pleasure. She thought she might never touch the ground again.

With a shudder, Chigs thrust forward a final time, filling her with the heat of his release.

She clung to his waist as her orgasm responded to his, an echo of micro shocks that went beyond mere carnal compulsions. It was as if their souls were joining. As if the entire purpose of the universe had come down to a single moment.

Chigs rolled to the side to take his weight off of her, propping his head on his elbow to look into her face. "I love you, Emmy. You're my destiny, my chosen."

A profound sense of peace and rightness settled over Emmy. This was her path, her destiny—not chosen for her by the capricious hand of fate, but claimed through her own courage and open heart. "And you are mine, Chigs."

* * *

Emmy woke to find Chigs gone. His shirt still spread against the sandy ground beneath her, her clothes draped like blankets across her body. Sitting up, she glanced around, peering through the darkness. The air had cooled with the coming of night. "Chigs?" Her voice echoed hollowly from the cavern walls.

The wind outside had eased, and the narrow opening in the rock gave her a glimpse of a velvet black sky glistening with stars. Rising, she quickly dressed, fumbling with the closures on her uniform. Surely he hadn't left her here alone? She went to the cave entrance and looked outside. Tiny stings of blowing sand pricked her skin, but at least it wasn't trying to flay her alive.

"Chigs!" She moved forward.

Within two steps, she was wading halfway up to her shins in sand. She cartwheeled her arms, but fell backward onto her ass. Crawling back inside the shelter, she rubbed the grit from her eyes.

What was Chigs up to? She couldn't imagine why he'd left her here to go off on his own. What if he got lost in the desert? Panicked questions zipped through her mind one after another as she imagined herself stranded in this desolate wasteland alone.

Heart pounding against her ribs, she paced back and forth in the cramped shelter, watching the entrance. He'd be back soon, right? The minutes stretched into an eternity as she waited. Just as she was considering heading back out to look for him, Chigs appeared with a pack slung over one shoulder.

"Where did you go? I was worried sick!"

"Sorry, akhala. I didn't mean to scare you." He stepped inside, black sand pouring from his broad shoulders like rain. "I went to check on the shuttle."

"Is it fixable?"

"Not by me," he said with a grimace. "The wiring's fried."

She returned his pained expression. "Any idea how far we are from the lab?"

He pulled a small device from the pack and peered at the screen. "Looks like the facility is only a few clicks away. It should take a couple of hours to reach it on foot."

She thought about the way the desert had tried to swallow her like quicksand. "On foot? How do we keep from sinking?"

"I'll carry you using my ionic powers." He hooked the scanner on his belt before retrieving a unit of water from the pack and handing it to her. "At least Tovik packed us a few supplies, though I have a few choice words for him about his shuttle maintenance skills when we get back to the Icarus."

"I'm sure the lab's security team knows we crashed." She popped the seal on the water and took a deep gulp, realizing how parched her throat was. She wanted to down the entire thing but wasn't sure how much water they had available, so she handed it back to Chigs instead. "Should we wait for a search party?"

Chigs took a small sip of water before capping it and putting it away. So she'd been right—that was probably the only source of water they had. "We weren't exactly on the guest list. Might be better if we get to the lab on our own."

She grimaced, remembering their plan to bluff their way in. Arriving on foot would only add to the scrutiny. "They probably don't have many guests knock at their front door, either."

"Every facility I was ever stationed at during my Syndicorp days had a back door. The layouts are always similar. I'm sure I can find it."

Emmy nodded, remembering rumors of an executive escape tunnel back on Xeranis. That way, the bigwigs wouldn't be trapped if the convicts rioted. "If you think so."

"Ellam Cua will guide us. Assuming I don't misinterpret the signs again." His teeth flashed in a wry grin in the darkness. "Better get going." He crouched down with his back to her. "Hop on."

Placing one hand on his shoulder for balance, Emmy climbed onto his back. The subtle scents of earth and masculine sweat clung to him, and her nipples tightened with awareness as they pressed against his muscular shoulder blades. She leaned close to his ear. "Is it wrong I want you again?"

He craned his neck around to meet her gaze, his eyes glinting in the darkness. "Don't tempt me, akhala."

She smiled, settling herself more comfortably against him. They might be on a dangerous mission, but she didn't think she'd ever felt so happy in her life.