13. Blaise

Seated beside Cole on the couch, I watch the flames flicker in the fireplace. Above it, a moose’s head with big antlers is mounted on the wall.

My father paces in front of us, pinching the bridge of his nose, thoroughly pissed off.

When we returned to the cottage, he ordered us into the living room, away from the girls. I swear his eye twitches when he levels Cole with a glare.

“I asked for one damn family holiday without you causing a scene. One! But you just had to start a fight on the first day, didn’t you?”

Cole is stiff beside me, and tension radiates off him in waves. He remains quiet, staring straight ahead at the fireplace.

“This was supposed to be a chance for us to bond as a family. How do you think it makes your mother feel when you fight with your brother every chance you get?”

I glance down at Cole’s clenched hands on his thighs, and when I lift my eyes, a muscle tics in his jaw. There used to be a time when I would get a sense of satisfaction from seeing my dad lay into him, but something feels wrong tonight. I feel wrong.

“She’s tired of your behavior, too. It doesn’t matter what we do or how many chances we give you, Cole. You go out of your way to ruin everything.” He points a finger in Cole’s direction and narrows his eyes. “It ends now.”

The muscle in Cole’s jaw tics again, and the ache that’s pressing on my ribs intensifies.

“Do you hear me, boy?”

“Dad…” I rip my eyes away from Cole, then rise to my feet. “He gets it, alright?”

Dad looks at me, blinking like he’d forgotten I was here. I’ve never thought about it until now, but I’m embarrassed. Cole is an asshole, sure, and he’s temperamental, argumentative, and…broken. But my dad never gave him a chance. No, in his eyes, Cole is cut from the same cloth as his alcoholic father.

“He gets it…” I emphasize, pleading with him to drop it.

My chest fucking throbs. What’s that shit about?

I don’t like how my father skates his attention to Cole, and I like it even less when a look of disgust flashes in his eyes.

It dawns on me that I’m protective of Cole. The instinct to defend him tingles my fingertips.

No one hurts him but me. No one gets to crawl beneath his skin.

I swallow down the lump in my throat. “I started it.”

Cole looks up at me. I stare at my dad, fighting the urge to check on him to ensure he’s okay.

I’m so confused.

Dad tightens his jaw, looking between us. Then he points at Cole again. “I will not tolerate you ruining this family holiday.”

Then my father walks out without another word, all but slamming the door shut behind him. I want to run after him and shove him so fucking hard that he crashes into the opposite wall and breaks his fucking nose.

I peer down at Cole, but he’s not looking at me. “He shouldn’t have treated you like that.”

Cole sucks on his teeth, the flames casting flickering shadows over his face. “Why did you do it?”

“Why did I do what?” I ask.

“Stand up for me.” His eyes lift, hooking my heart and tugging at something inside me. I take him in, sweeping my gaze over his lips and the stubble on his jaw—lips I want to feel pressed against mine. The emotions he evokes when he looks at me scare the living daylights out of me, yet here I am, unable to break eye contact.

My throat jumps. “I did what I thought was right⁠—”

He flies to his feet, standing so close that his heated breaths fan my mouth. “Next time, don’t.”

I frown, bouncing my eyes between his. Why is he so angry? What have I done wrong now? My father was a dick to him, and I couldn’t just let that slide.

“I don’t want you to defend me, Blaise,” he seethes. “I didn’t fucking ask for it, alright? I can look after myself.”

“I know you can,” I reply, struck with the need to explain. “I didn’t suggest otherwise.”

“No? Then why the hell are you getting involved? Do you think your dad is the first asshole I’ve had to deal with? That I can’t stand up for myself? I’m not fucking weak.”

“I never said you were⁠—”

“Stay out of my fucking business, brother,” he sneers before turning on his heel and walking away.

I stare after him.

What is wrong with me? I almost feel like I want to…cry or punch something.

No, fuck that.

“You’re scared, Cole,” I call out, and he pauses in the doorway with his back to me. “You’re so used to being treated like shit by everyone—your dad and mine… It’s where you feel safe. You would rather push everyone away than allow yourself to be vulnerable.”

When he stays silent, I throw my hands out defeatedly. “Not everyone is against you, Cole. Sooner or later, you will need to let someone past those fucking walls you’ve built so damn high. You want to hate me? Is that what you need to feel good? To feel safe? You want a villain? Fine. I’ll be your worst fucking nightmare.”

This time, when he walks out, I slump.

What the hell was that? He makes no secret of hating me, but when I try to do the right thing, he throws it back in my face. I can’t fucking win. Screw him and his wounded pride. I couldn’t just stand by while my dad was being a dick.

Grinding my teeth to dust, I rip my eyes away from the door, then glance up at the moose’s head. The huge antlers cast grotesque shadows over the walls, and its eyes are as dead as my soul once used to be before Cole fucking Carter had to go and awaken these foreign emotions. I don’t know how to handle them, which pisses me off.

“What the fuck are you looking at?” I sneer at the moose.

Is thereanything cheesier than board games? I think not.

Cole’s mom came prepared on this trip, and now we’re seated around the dining table, playing Monopoly while it’s snowing outside.

I’m bored out of my mind, slouched in my chair, arm stretched out on the back of Mia’s chair. I twist a curl of her hair around my finger while making no secret of watching Cole. He hasn’t looked at me once.

Fuck him.

He tries so hard to play the perfect boyfriend, but I see through him. Unlike me, who has perfected my social game to fit in, he can’t hide his disinterest in his girlfriend. Every time she leans into him, he shifts away, even if it’s only slight. When she plays with the curls at his nape, he stiffens. His smiles are forced and don’t reach his ears. But he tries. He tries so fucking hard to keep his eyes off me while giving her flirtatious looks, engaging in a far more intriguing game than the one spread out before us.

The only time Cole feels safe is when he’s hiding.

It’s what he’s good at—hiding behind masks, walls, and harsh words.

With that thought in mind, I discreetly unlock my phone beneath the table and send him a mirror selfie I took earlier of me naked and wet from a recent shower.

Me: I fantasize about you chasing me again.

After placing the phone on my thigh, I reach for my Coke bottle, watching him closely while taking a swig. He must have his burner phone on him. I bet my girlfriend’s non-existent virginity on it. He’s too fucking curious about me to leave it with his things back in the room.

“It’s your turn,” Dad says, dragging me from my musings.

I pick up the dice and toss them on the board. Two threes. I move my wheelbarrow.

“Go straight to jail,” Mia sniggers, leaning into me and scratching her nails over my thigh beneath the table.

Curling my fingers around her wrist, I’m about to shove her off.

What the hell am I doing? I didn’t even think as I gripped her. It was instinct. I didn’t want her to touch me because of the asshole across the table.

Fuck him and the effect he has on me.

I loosen my grip, stroking my thumb over her wrist. My lips curve when Cole digs something out of his hoodie’s front pocket. His hair falls over his brow as he looks down.

Gotcha.

He stiffens, ignoring Allie’s excited squeal beside him when she throws two sixes. I hide my smile behind the rim of my Coke while he works his jaw before typing out a response.

The phone vibrates on my thigh.

Cole looks up at me, straightening in his seat and flicking his hair out of his eyes.

My dick likes that he looks annoyed. Maybe even angry. Whatever the emotion is behind the hardening of his eyes, I like it.

I’ve crawled beneath his skin, and I have every intention of burrowing deeper.

His hand trembles as he swipes up the dice, rolling them in his closed palm before tossing them back down. Two fives. He moves his piece past mine and picks up a card.

Dad drinks the last of his red wine, then refills it to the top. Cole follows the movement, watching him place it back down. He pays the bank and settles back with his arm stretched out on the back of Allie’s chair.

I finally have his eyes on me, and I pretend I don’t notice as I unlock my phone beneath the table.

Cole: You want to choke on cock that badly, huh?

I almost chuckle out loud. Now that I know it’s Cole behind the messages, I get one heck of a kick from riling him up.

Me: Not just any cock. Yours.

I look up through my lashes, smirking.

Allie throws her head back and laughs at one of Mia’s stories while Cole stares at his phone beneath the table. Then he types, and I wait.

My dick likes seeing him visibly rattled like he is now. He tries to hide it, but I track every subtle stiff shift of his muscles.

When Allie beams at him, he drags his eyes away from his phone, but his attention is elsewhere. A bead of sweat trails down his temple as his eyes flicker my way, then back down.

My phone vibrates.

“Isn’t this nice?” Cole’s mom asks, leaning into Dad. “Us here, together as a family.”

He makes an affirmative noise, his eyes narrowing on Cole as he picks up his glass of wine. I watch the movement while grinding my teeth. What is his fucking problem now? I never realized what a fucking ass he is to my stepbrother, and it doesn’t sit right with me.

I reach for the phone to distract myself, typing in the passcode one-handed. Mia trails her nails over my back, picking up a card. Imaginary spiders crawl down my spine as her nails scratch me through my hoodie. It’s a physical struggle not to shake her off.

Fuck...

I don’t want her to touch me.

Cole: I’m blackmailing you, yet you still want to suck my dick. Are you that desperate?

Chuckling, I wet my lips.

He’s so damn serious, frowning across the table. It’s simple—I want to make him jealous. Now that I know it’s Cole behind the mask, I can’t stop replaying how he chased me down and showed me a rare glimpse of the true him.

He has urges no one knows about, and I like that knowledge a little too much.

Me: Your threats have me in a chokehold.

Cole looks down at his phone beneath the table.

Shifting in my seat, I type out another message.

Me: I like it when you steal my breath.

My fingers fly over the screen, and I glance up at him as I hit send.

Me: You have me by my balls, so I might as well enjoy it. Besides, I can’t stop thinking about how you stroked my dick.

What intrigues me about Cole is that he looks conflicted for reasons other than the mere question of his sexuality. He almost looks…jealous. His jaw is tight, and his eyes are hard.

He shoves his phone into his pocket and swipes his Coke bottle. Allie startles at the sudden movement and asks him if he’s okay.

Ignoring her, he swigs his drink, his eyes burning into my face. I whisper in Mia’s ear, and she giggles.

This is the difference between me and Cole. I’ve mastered this game, whereas he’s struggling to read the rulebook. I can play the doting, loved-up boyfriend and make it look real.

Mia’s eyes glitter with happiness, and I know that I should feel bad for using her as a pawn on this playing board. But everyone plays a part in the grand scheme of things.

The only person I care about, and who stirs the numbness inside me, is the boy across the table.

He looks at me, and I tilt my head.

What are you thinking about, Cole?

“It’s your turn to roll the dice, son,” Cole’s mom says to him, reaching for her wine glass.

Seconds pass while we watch each other, caught in our own world. Flames flicker in the fireplace, and snow flurries sail through the air outside, but he’s all I see.

He looks away first, picking up the dice and shaking them in his palm. With a flick of his wrist, they fly across the board, knocking over my wheelbarrow in the process.

Two sixes.

I raise a brow, and he smirks.

Well played, Cole.

Sharinga bed with Cole and our girlfriends isn’t how I imagined this trip. Needless to say, I can’t sleep.

Not when my cock is hard, and Cole looks so damn irresistible asleep on his front with his bare back on full display.

Mia was pressed up against me earlier with her thigh over mine and her cheek on my chest. I was too hot and restless to sleep.

Instead, I found myself hovering by Cole’s bedside. I’m hard. Frustrated. His dark hair obscures his eyes, so I reach out to stroke it away. Why does my heart thud harder when I feel his warmth?

I linger on his skin, tracing my finger on the scar on his hip, glancing at the girls, who’re fast asleep, snuggled up together. They’d make a perfect couple if they didn’t like cock so much. I can’t blame them. Cole’s dick is all I can think about these days.

I lift my eyes to the girls one final time, wetting my lips in anticipation of what I’m about to do. When I’m reassured that they won’t wake up after I spiked their drinks with Rachel’s sleeping pills, I straddle him naked on the bed. He startles awake, and I loop my belt around his neck while he tugs on the restraints that I used to secure his wrists to the bed frame. What can I say? I came prepared. Did he think I would make this easy on him?

His words are muffled behind the duct tape on his mouth, and he tries to look at me over his shoulder. I pull the belt tight, then lean down to whisper in his ear, “You want a fucking villain, Cole?”

He stiffens, throwing a panicked glance at the girls.

“Villains don’t ask nicely,” I whisper, circling the belt around my hand. “They take. Is that what you want? A bad guy who steals your choice?”

His back breaks out in a cold sweat, and I smile against the shell of his ear before tracing it with my tongue. I bite down, making him grunt from the sharp sting. “Do you know what I think, brother?” Shifting, I settle on top of him. “Beneath your bad attitude, you’re a slut.”

When I yank down his boxers to expose his firm ass, his struggle renews, and he pulls on the restraints as he tries to wriggle out from beneath me, but soon stops when I pull on the belt.

“Shhhh. You don’t want to wake our girlfriends.”

My big cock nestles between his ass cheeks, and his harsh breaths rattle his chest. I pull his short hair with my free hand, forcing a groan from his throat, then rock forward, sliding my dick through his ass crack.

“Fuck,” I grunt, looking between our bodies. It’s dark in the room, and I can only just make out the outline of my weeping dick.

“I guess you’re weak, after all.” I chuckle, shoving his head into the mattress. “Fight me all you want. You’re taking my dick tonight whether you want it or not.” Swirling my tongue through the sweat on his nape, I breathe against his ear, “But we both know you do. Your ass feels empty, doesn’t it? Want me to fill you up and fuck you until you can’t walk tomorrow?” I hum, grinding against his ass. “I like thinking of you waking up next to your girlfriend, with your brother’s cum leaking from your ass. Does she rim you, Cole? Do you let that pretty girlfriend of yours lick your ass?”

He yanks on the restraints, breathing harshly through his nose.

If I hadn’t tied him up, he’d shove me off and ram his fist into my face. Punch me bloodied. Why does that thought turn me on? I like him naked and defenseless.

I bet his dick throbs as much as mine.

“You love it, don’t you?” My breaths tremble against the curve of his neck, and I suck his earlobe between my teeth. “You love that you have no choice but to take it.” I shudder, grinding harder against him. “I want to fuck your ass, Cole. I bet you’re tight.”

Jesus Christ… I’m so screwed.

I chuckle breathily against his ear, but it’s not to taunt him. No, he has all the power without even realizing it. I’m powerless against him when he shivers beneath me—tied up, naked, and trembling.

“Why do you drive me so fucking insane?” I’m struggling to keep my wits about me when he feels this good. He throws his head back, and I barely dodge in time.

“Fuck,” I laugh and dig my fingers into his sweaty neck. “Nearly broke my nose. Naughty boy.” Pistoning against his ass, I pound him into the mattress.

My hair falls over my brow as I watch my dick slide through his ass cheeks. Fuck me. It’s the most erotic thing I’ve seen.

I sink my teeth into my lip, circling my hips. I’ve never been this aroused. Not even with Mia.

Sliding my fingers through the damp hair at his neck, I press his face into the mattress. “I’m in control, Cole. You can build your walls as high as you want. I’ll demolish them every time. Don’t you think I can feel you humping the mattress?”

Braced on my elbow, I squeeze his hip, grinding harder against his ass. “One day, I’m going to fuck you. Remember that tomorrow when Allie asks you if you love her.”

I glance down in time to see cum squirt from my dick, and I collapse forward, panting against his neck. Cole’s out of breath, too, and his sweaty back is slick against my chest. I kiss his neck and shoulder before pushing up and climbing off the bed.

Cole turns his head away from me while I free his wrists, and I hesitate, struck with a pang of regret. What if I hurt him? What if I took it too far? But then again, so what? He asked for a villain, and I’ll be whatever he needs. Even if I turn into the bad guy.

When he’s free, he turns his body away from me, too.

“Don’t ask for a villain, Cole, if you don’t want to get hurt.” I stroke my fingers through his hair, and he flinches. “Do you feel safe now? Protected behind your walls. You didn’t get to come. I bet your dick is throbbing, huh?” Fisting his hair, I pull hard, and he shoots up from the bed and fights me off, causing me to stumble back several steps.

I’m relieved, to be honest, to see the fire back in his eyes. The way his nostrils flare as he rises to his feet, ripping off the duct tape.

“You like this, don’t you?” I taunt. “It feels good to hurt, right? This is what you want. To be treated like shit.”

Cole comes for me, and we crash into the wall, knocking down a painting.

“What did you do to the girls? Why the fuck are they still asleep?”

“I told you,” I whisper, “I’m not a good guy. Do you think I’ll let our girlfriends stand in the way of me hurting you? Owning you? I did what I had to do.” I fist his dick, stroking the firm length from root to tip and smiling. “So fucking needy, huh?”

He grunts. “I fucking hate you.”

“Good.” His dick pulses in my hand. “You can hate me while you come all over my fingers.”

“Fuck you,” he growls, thrusting against my palm, his choppy breaths fanning my mouth. “Fuck you to hell and back.”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you? My dick in your ass.”

“Shut up.”

I grin, nipping his jaw when he pulls away to look down at his cock in my hand. “You’re leaking all over my fingers. Such a filthy boy, hmm?”

Grabbing my chin, he shoves my head against the wall, and I laugh harder.

“Just admit that you love this.”

“Stop talking.” He shudders before crashing against me as cum erupts from his dick.

Seconds pass. Cole stays pressed against my chest, his face buried in my neck. Neither of us moves.

“Your heart is pounding,” I whisper against his shoulder, feeling the organ thrash behind his ribs.

He shudders, inhaling a ragged breath.

This is us.

This is our push and pull.

Our battlefield.

“If you ever touch me again,” he breathes against my skin, “I’ll kill you. I won’t hesitate to end you.”

Trailing my fingers through the sweat and cum on his back, I hum while his muscles shift and ripple. “That sounds like a promise.”

His husky voice drifts over my ear. “Stay away from me, Blaise.”

“That’s right, I almost forgot,” I say, feeling his shoulder blades move beneath my fingers. “I forget that you want me to hurt you. You’re not scared of me shoving you away or punching you in the face.”

His pulse thunders in his throat as I trail my lips over the curve of his neck, and I dart my tongue out to tease his earlobe, whispering, “You’re scared of what would happen if I hugged you now. If I held you close and told you how fucking perfect you are. You’d sooner cut yourself open on your own blade than let someone hold you after they’re done fucking you.” Though it pains me to do it, I press my palms to his chest and shove him away.

He stumbles back, and I walk past him. “Don’t worry, Cole. I could never fall for you. You’re safe.”

Lies.

Fucking lies.