Chapter 39

By next morning, Melinda felt happier than she could ever remember and she wanted it to last. That made it necessary to clear away the dross frae the gold in their marriage.

After an active night making up for the lovemaking missed through her fear to tell Rob the truth, they were both as tired as one another. Her head rested in the crook of his shoulder and their arms stayed entwined as if letting go might change everything, which meant screwing up her courage to ask Rob, “What was it ye said ye needed to tell me?”

A shudder ran through him he couldn’t hide because they were so close.

“If ye are not ready—”

He squeezed her arm, interrupting her before she could give him an excuse to explain why he was acting furtively.

Then he began to justify his actions, “It’s not what ye would call a secret. Morag knows, as does Nhaimeth—they just don’t know everything.” He cleared his throat, but Melinda didn’t comment. Who knew how she would feel when she came to his next confession?

“As yer aware, like the twins I was born at Wolfsdale, as were Morag and Gavyn. My mother had a younger brother, Doughall. He died here at Cragenlaw attacking the castle with Kathryn’s father Erik the Bear, who ye will have heard was Nhaimeth’s father. Does that sound o’er-complicated?”

She shook her head, her face brushing his chest as she denied any confusion. She just didn’t yet understand what it had to do with Rob’s confession.

“I know ye have heard rumours about William Rufus preferring men to women. Doughall Farquhar was just such a one, but more much more wicked. The scar on Gavyn’s face is frae when Doughall tried to kill him in a battle afore I was born. Gavyn didn’t die, but he lost his memory, and it was while Morag was searching for Gavyn after the battle that she found and rescued the McArthur and I was conceived.”

Until then Rob had felt if not relaxed then untroubled by the story he revealed. Now the arms circling her felt tense, though she doubted that he realised. Her instincts told her they had reached the crux of the problem—his birth.

“Morag was very young. She had nae notion how to send Euan a message…” He paused and she wondered whether he was remembering that they had been kept apart by the failure of Melinda to send word, but she said naught, her silence the signal for him to continue.

“So we lived with my grandfather. Doughall had become his heir and was confident enough to bring his so-called friend, Kalem, to live with us. My grandfather was wise enough not to let on. It was my fault he was killed.”

Melinda drew in a sharp gasp. There was no chance Rob hadn’t noticed. She squeezed his hand and said, “He must have getting on in years. Mayhap—”

“I said it was my fault. I didn’t mean I had killed him. Kalem did that, worried I might complain to my grandfather. I’d warned him I would.” He lifted her hand to kiss. “Doughall hated me. Morag was only a woman, younger than he, but I was my grandfather’s favourite and a danger. I can’t remember how young I was when he began whispering ‘bastard’ in my ear.

Kalem was inclined to join in the jest, but he carried it farther. He was the one who explained that bastards were fit for only one thing, and he kept reminding me of it, taking the opportunity to fondle me every time he found me alone.” He dragged in a harsh breath, almost a sob.

After his courageous effort to keep her safe, she couldn’t bear to hear him recount any more. She could see it had left a scar on his soul that still ached. “Ach, my love, don’t say another word. My heart aches fer ye.”

“That was when Morag determined that we had to escape Wolfsdale afore Doughall had us killed as well. I was big for my age and Morag made out I was her brother, I’ve called her by her given name ever since we left Wolfsdale.” He pulled her close, wrapped her in his arms, resting his chin on her head until his breathing calmed, finally saying, “Ye can understand why I forced ye into this marriage. It wasn’t for me, it was for our sons. I couldn’t bear them to go through what I did. There are so many wicked men, aye, and women,” he told her, and Melinda knew he thought of Brodwyn as he said it.

“Ye can include my father in that number.”

Rob felt confused. He knew about Henry La Mont and the wrestling that took place in the ancient Roman cavern—St Clair had told him. He hadn’t imagined La Mont to be that way inclined. Easier to say naught, he decided. Melinda had listened to his tale; he owed her the opportunity and the release frae the past he’d had, having got it off his chest. This morning was about trust, not to be mistaken for love; the former could cause much more heartache than the latter.

“Did ye never wonder why my father never even scolded me for taking a lover and getting with child?”

“Nae, I knew ye were a bit spoiled, but that’s because ye were his only child. Now I’m not so sure, after discovering yer mother’s fate. I’m sure that’s why he didn’t remarry. He blamed the difference in Rowena on himself. Even Erik the Bear had his doubts when Nhaimeth was born,” he said, explaining the example he had given her.

“I didn’t realise why until well after the twins were born. My father is obsessed with having an heir of his own bloodline. Did ye never wonder why he went off to Winchester and left his young daughter alone at Wolfsdale with a handsome young Scotsman, held ransom yet given the run of the house? I have. My father manipulated us, and he was fortunate, for we gave him not just one heir, but two. It mattered naught that I refused to reveal the name of my lover. I’m certain he had an inkling I would be drawn to the handsome young Scot he had captured for ransom.”

She covered her mouth with her hand and he thought for an instant she might burst into tears. Melinda proved him wrong when she removed her hand from her mouth to show him her smile. “I should be annoyed that he was proved correct, but I can’t. Without his interference we might never have met, and look at all we would have lost. I love ye, Rob. I’m profoundly happy to share my life with ye and I’ll never keep secrets from ye again. I nearly ruined everything we have by being too clever for my own good.”

“Ach, my love, ye have my heart, and I’ll try to prove myself worthy of yer love every day for the rest of my life. And, of course, there will be no decisions made in our family unless they’re unanimous. I love ye, Melinda. Never forget it.”

Rocking her in his arms he became aware that his hard prick had sought out her softness again the way it had done all through the night. He nuzzled her ear and whispered, “It still looks fairly early, I’m thinking we needn’t get out of bed for a while yet.”

Melinda pushed away, her hands on his chest above the thud of his heart and for that she was entirely responsible. He recognised mischief in her bonnie green eyes as she stared directly into his. “I agree,” she said pressing against his erect prick, and afore he could reply she giggled. “I think we just made our first unanimous decision.”

As he made that first long delicious thrust inside her, it occurred to Rob that his wife was absolutely and deliciously correct.