Chapter 52

Sophie

Sophie tossed and turned as she tried to drown out the sounds of Marcus and Erica's lovemaking. She was positive they were being deliberately loud, trying to get under her skin.

The problem was, it was working.

She felt an uncomfortable bubble of jealousy in her stomach. But the sounds of pleasure were turning her on and making her desperate for a man's touch.

Stupid pregnancy hormones.

This was a bad idea. She never should've come here. What was she thinking? Marcus had moved on, and deep down she knew it even when she begged him for another chance. Her ego pushed her to embarrass herself and think she still had some hold over him.

He made it painfully obvious she did not.

The thing was, she didn't even love him. She knew that. Did she miss him? Yeah, sometimes she truly did. Something was intoxicating about being as loved as she once was by him. With Alex being so distant, and her hormones making her crazy, having Marcus back seemed appealing.

But she didn't want him. God forbid he took her back. She'd only cheat on him again, chasing something she thought was better.

Stupid pregnancy hormones.

At this point, what did she want? She thought Alex was it. Charming, devastatingly handsome. Incredible in bed. Absolutely fucking loaded. He should have been everything she wanted. He had been everything she wanted.

So, what changed ?

She glanced up at the ceiling as she registered the silence, breathing a sigh of relief. Finally, she felt as though she could relax, rolling onto her side as she felt the baby squirm inside her.

Ah, poor baby.

Was her little nugget the reason her feelings had died for Alex? Perhaps. But given everything that had happened, she wasn't sure motherhood was for her after all.

Surprisingly, even to herself, she loved her daughter. Every time she felt a little flutter, she imagined tiny little hands waving hello and felt her heart soar.

But love, as she knew well, was not enough.

Being a single mother wasn't for her. She'd only decided to have a baby when she had Alex's money to support her. Without it, she couldn't imagine how she'd cope. She could barely look after herself. She couldn't take care of an entire human that relied only on her.

So then, what?

She was far too selfish to consider adoption. She wouldn't feel right knowing someone else was raising her child. Adoption was completely out of the question.

But then, so was every other option.

"I'm sorry, Odette," she whispered, running her hand over her stomach. "I really fucked up your life and you're not even here yet."

Swallowing past a lump in her throat, she closed her eyes, trying to force herself to sleep. When that didn't work, she tried counting sheep. She heard a moan of pleasure through the ceiling. Sighing in frustration, she pulled a pillow over her head.

What was the point?

She couldn't sleep in this house. Not with the two freaks upstairs working the way through the Kama Sutra. Nor with her own mind looking to chip away at her self-esteem. And that's not to mention the weird vibes this house gave off.

What had Marcus said before he went out? Look out for Anna?

Sophie wasn't sure she wanted to know who the hell Anna was, or why she needed to look out for her. But she couldn't deny the awful feeling of being watched .

God, she wanted to leave.

She couldn't afford a hotel, not for how long she'd have to stay, and she'd burned all her bridges with her friends. Alex was obviously not an option, and her mother lived too far away for them to be a viable option.

It suddenly occurred to her just how lonely she was.

"Never alone though, am I?" She said, tracing patterns across her bump. Odette squirmed beneath her fingers, nudging back against her. "Yeah, you're always here, aren't you nugget?"

Maybe her mother was the only choice. What else could she do?

She just couldn't imagine rocking up on her doorstep pregnant, divorced and homeless. Why hadn't she told her about her marriage ending?

Well, because she knew dear ol' mum would blame her. Even without knowing the details, they would automatically assume she was at fault.

Nope. Forget that.

Her mother was out of the question. As far as she was aware, she was still in wedded bliss with Marcus, and Sophie had no intentions of correcting her. Much easier to keep her distance from her and keep her business to herself.

That really only left Alex.

Was that a possibility? He had that big house, after all. They didn't have to continue sharing a room. But he did promise he'd do his duty as a father and surely the very basics of that were providing a roof over his child's head.

It wouldn't be too bad.

Back at that house, she'd have support. The maid, the chef. A nanny. She wouldn't have to lift a finger and all would be well. They would care for Odette better than she ever could. Sophie could be there for the important stuff. Like make-up advice! And fashion choices.

Oh! And boys. She'd love to help her daughter with dating advice.

Reaching for her phone, she frowned at the picture of Marcus and Erica smiling back at her.

Shit .

This wasn't her phone, after all. It was Erica's and the stupid bitch had left it unlocked. Glancing around, her fingers hesitated, poised above the messaging app. Cries still came from somewhere above her, and the unmistakable squeak of bedsprings. No one would ever know.

Again, the feeling of being watched overwhelmed her. Scoffing, she opened the app defiantly. "Fuck off, Anna, you judgmental bitch."

There was only one person Sophie was interested in seeing texts from. She didn't care that Erica's mum had wished her a happy birthday. Or that her dumb brother sent pictures from their night out. She ignored the soppy I love you from Marcus and rolled her eyes as her father expressed how proud he was.

All she wanted to see was Alex's name.

With a sinking feeling, she realised she didn't have to scroll too far. In a message completely ignored, Alex wished her a happy birthday and expressed his love for her. When did he have time to send that message?

Scrolling further back through the messages, she blinked past the tears as, over and over, he tried to contact Erica and begged for her to come home throughout the year.

"... constantly miss you…"

"... nothing is the same without you…"

"... come home…"

"... she really means nothing to me. She's nothing compared to you…"

She paused and reread that message again, Odette kicking her as though sensing her pain.

"You can keep ignoring my messages. It won't stop me from sending them. And if you block me again, I'll get a new number. I can't believe you're being this stubborn over some slut that was so desperate she spread her legs for a married man. Yeah, I was weak, but so what? She really means nothing to me. She's nothing compared to you. No one is.

Have your fun with dickhead, but you'll be back in my bed before the year's out. "

Wiping away a tear, she checked the date of the message.

"So long ago now," she said to no one in particular. It must have been a week or two after Erica left him, but it didn't take away the sting of his words.

God, she really was pathetic.

Only ten minutes ago she told herself she didn't love him anymore and now here she was weeping over how much he hurt her. It didn't matter that he'd sent the message so long ago; the fact was, he'd followed it up with so many other messages since then.

How did she ever convince herself he cared for her?

And the real kicker was that he had been completely right. She had been desperate. Her entire affair with Alex was born out of jealousy over Erica. Yes, she had fallen for Alex, but in the beginning, she wasn't even really interested in him.

All she had wanted was to get one over on the woman who seemed to have it all. The beautiful clothes and immaculate hair. A rich husband who was good-looking and completely doted on her. A beautiful house and a fantastic car. The admiration of those around her and the security of loyal friends.

Sophie wanted everything Erica had.

She thought all it took was to present herself a certain way. Dress well and keep on top of her appearance. Stay friendly and open towards people. Hold herself high. She thought if she did all those things, everything else would slot into place and for the longest time, it seemed she was right.

Sophie stole Alex and stole Erica's wealth. She took her position at Alex's company and lived the life she always imagined for herself. All the pieces were there for her to erase Erica from Alex's history. But that was the problem - she wasn't Erica.

And what did it matter, anyway?

Erica still had the handsome guy who doted on her, the beautiful house, the thriving business and large cash flow. And what did Sophie have ?

In the end, everything Sophie had done had been for nought. Erica had won the war, and everything had changed without changing at all.

In fact, all Sophie had done was give Erica a better life with a better man and a better love story.

She laughed out loud into the darkness. "How's that for karma, Anna?" She said with a scoff. Looking down, she tossed Erica's phone away, not realising she still had it in her hands. What had she wanted her own phone for?

Oh, right. Yes. To text Alex.

Well, that was out of the question.

She wouldn't embarrass herself further and beg him to take her back. Not even for the sake of her child.

First thing in the morning, she'd leave this wretched house, book into a hotel and figure it out from there.

Screw Alex.

Screw Marcus.

Screw lovely, perfect Erica.

She didn't need anyone else.

Not now, not ever.