Chapter 34

thirty-four

PAUL

Reading Amy a bedtime story had taken longer than I thought. By the time I made it downstairs, Liam was in the kitchen, drying the last mixing bowl.

He looked up and my heart squeezed tight. Whether he wanted to or not, he'd become an important part of our lives. "Thank you for doing the dishes. I didn't think I'd be so long."

"That's okay." He opened a cupboard and placed the mixing bowl on top of another. "Did Amy enjoy the story?"

"She did. Except she wanted me to read two more stories." I turned on the coffeepot, trying to steady my racing heart. "Let me make you a drink. I'll find some cake as well."

"What are your plans for tomorrow?"

I smiled, though it felt forced. "Apart from finishing the cookies and decorating the cakes, I thought I'd update my website. What about you?"

"I promised a little girl I'd take her on another sled ride. "

The sincerity in his voice made my heart ache. "It's okay to say no. You must have other things you need to do."

Liam took two plates out of a cupboard. "I enjoy spending time with her."

I organized our cups, then waited beside the coffeepot, trying to gather my thoughts. I didn't know how to talk to Liam about Amy, how to tell him we needed to be careful without hurting him.

"Liam?"

His eyebrows rose. "Yes?"

"I need to say something, but I don't want you to take it the wrong way."

"Should I sit down?" His attempt at humor made my heart twist.

I sighed, feeling the weight of the conversation pressing down on me. "This is important. We need to be careful. About Amy."

"Amy's safe. Alex hasn't received any more emails threatening her life."

"That's not what I meant."

Liam frowned, a look of concern clouding his eyes. "If you're worried about someone finding us, the risk is extremely low."

"It's not the terrorists I'm worried about. It's you."

The gleam in Liam's eyes was replaced by confusion. "What do you mean?"

"I'm worried that Amy's becoming too attached to you."

"She likes my company because I'm different. If there were other people here, they'd be a distraction and keep her busy."

"It's more than that. Amy wanted to know if we could stay with you forever. It'll be hard on her when we leave." I took a sheet of paper out of my pocket. "She made this for you. I think she sees us as a family."

Liam studied the picture for so long that I didn't think he was going to speak.

When he handed the picture back to me, there was a hint of sadness in his eyes. "Everyone's your best friend when you're six years old. Once Amy's in Milwaukee, her life will settle into a normal routine. She won't even know I'm not there."

I poured two cups of coffee and handed one to him. "I think she'll miss you more than you realize."

Liam sighed. "I guess this means our sled ride tomorrow won't happen."

The disappointment in his voice broke my heart. "I know it's hard to understand. Amy's at a tricky age. What's happened has been stressful enough for her. I don't want her getting hurt."

"I don't want that either." Liam cradled his cup in his hands, his gaze dropping to the floor. "I could do less around the house with her."

I didn't know if that would help. Amy had a way of becoming involved in almost everything around her. "I could take her sledding tomorrow."

"You can't be on the mountain on your own. Even though the risk of anything happening is extremely low, it's still there."

"You could watch from the sidelines."

"How long do you think that would last?" Liam looked up, a mix of frustration and understanding in his eyes.

"I know it's not ideal, but it's the best I can come up with. I've already talked to her about your life in Boulder. She knows it's a long way from Milwaukee, but she still thinks we can spend time together. "

Liam left his coffee on the counter and stood in front of me, his expression earnest. "What if I could move to Milwaukee?"

With a pounding heart, I looked into Liam's eyes. "Why would you do that?" When he held my hands, I held my breath, waiting for what came next.

"I'm not very good at showing people how I feel, but I really like you. I want to spend more time with you after this is over. If I moved to Milwaukee, we could go to the movies. Have dinner. Do things most people enjoy when they're getting to know each other."

"What about your job?"

"The FBI has an office there. I could request a transfer."

Deciding to spend more time with Liam was one thing. But knowing he'd left his house and job to be closer to us was a big commitment. "What if it doesn't work?"

"It's a risk I'm willing to take. I enjoy spending time with you and Amy, and I can't see that changing. If it does, at least we'll both know it wasn't meant to be."

What I needed to do was think logically, but I couldn't see beyond the warmth in Liam's blue eyes.

"I would never do anything to hurt either of you."

I took a deep breath. "I know you wouldn't but, for Amy, life doesn't come in shades of gray. If you move to Milwaukee, you'll become an even more important part of her life."

"Nothing comes with guarantees. I promise I'll do everything I can to make you both happy."

I lifted my hands to Liam's shoulders. Beneath his shirt, his muscles tensed. "I don't know what the future holds," I began, my voice trembling, "but I like you, too. I want to be part of your life, but?— "

Liam's lips brushed against mine, sending a jolt of electricity through me.

Instant heat spread through my body. I forgot about the reasons why this wasn't a good idea, why I should step away and end whatever was happening between us. All I could think about was Liam and how good it felt to be kissing him.

I moved closer and Liam groaned, molding me against his hard body.

Before my brain completely switched off, I made an important decision. Tomorrow would be soon enough to wonder if letting him into my heart was a good idea.