Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

Ashley

A shley had never been so exhausted in her life as she was when they’d checked into the hotel. Sometime over this last car ride, she had processed enough of what had happened to move on and now she was drained.

Clearly, she had slept before, naked and on Carter’s chest. Knowing he had to come get her out of the shower was insane. He was unbothered, so she chose to not worry about that now. Later, she’d process it.

“Well,” Carter said as they went in the hotel room.

“What?” Looking around the room, she noted the one bed. “Nothing we haven’t done before. We have to rest.”

The only way forward through this was to be sensible and pragmatic about it. If not, she’d panic.

“True. We don’t need to stay long, just get some rest and then I want to get back on the road.”

“You have to rest, too,” she told him. “When was the last time you even slept?”

“I slept some in the hotel.”

She put her hand on her hip as she studied him. “Not much if you did.”

“Order some food for both of us. I’m going to shower.”

Ashley sighed but grabbed the room service menu off the side table and looked through it. Making a decision, she placed the order.

The TV remote was near the bed, so she sat back against the pillows and stretched her legs out in front of her. It was taking all she had to act like this was totally normal, but she was going to do it.

Carter emerged from the bathroom with wet hair and new clothes. She did her best to ignore him.

“Did you order something?”

She nodded. “I got you a burger.”

“Cool. They say how long?”

She looked at the alarm clock on the nightstand. “About ten more minutes.”

He looked around the room before walking around the bed and taking up the only chair in the space.

If he didn’t want to sit with her, that was fine. She wasn’t going to be offended or hurt. This was his job, she reminded herself. She hoped he was getting paid well for all of this.

When they knocked to deliver the food, she didn’t move. Carter went and retrieved it, bringing it back to the side table.

“Either I’m really hungry or this actually looks really good.” He lifted the covers from the meals on the tray. “Did you get the same thing?”

“I figured it was a safe order. Hotel food can be weird.”

“Fair. Do you want the chair and table, or should I bring you your dinner?”

“Here’s fine.” She sat forward and crossed her legs so the plate could go on the bed in front of her.

“For the price of this room, you’d think there’d be at least two chairs in here.”

“I don’t think people are spending much time in their rooms here.”

He grunted.

They ate and watched some weird TV show in silence. The room was heavy with anxiety from her . . . and maybe him, too.

She set her empty plate on the tray, having eaten everything, and grabbed her bag. Closing the bathroom door, she sighed. Sharing spaces with Carter was getting to her. Hopefully at his home, she’d get her own room.

Ashley brushed her teeth and changed back into her sweats before leaving the bathroom. Carter was stretched out on the bed when she got back, surprising her.

“We have to get some rest. We aren’t on a timeline really, but I’d prefer to travel at night where we can.”

“Do we need to stay in another hotel room before we make it to your place?”

“Hopefully not.”

Ashley lay down next to him and got comfortable. The TV was still on, playing the news for the area now.

“I’ll go get ready for bed.” She felt the mattress move as Carter got up.

She was facing the other direction, not wanting him to think she was trying to cuddle with him again. Twice now, she’d had some kind of breakdown in his presence where he’d had to hold her. It was so unlike her.

The last thing she wanted was for him to think he had to hold her. He was being paid to be around her, and even though they’d nearly kissed the other day, she didn’t think this was what he wanted.

Carter returned, and the bed moved again as he lay down. “What are we watching?”

She had no idea and handed him the remote. “Not a clue. Feel free to find something.”

He flipped through channels and ended up on a baseball game. “This works. Okay with you?”

“Sure.” She’d never watched baseball before in her life.

“Cool.” He dropped his arm and it grazed her butt. “Sorry.”

“It’s fine.” She didn’t dare move.

The TV was the only thing in the room that made a sound after that.

As she lay there, her hip started to hurt from being on her side for too long. Carefully, she turned over to face Carter, only to find him looking at her.

“You’re doing great with all this,” he told her.

“Thanks.”

He shifted so they were now facing each other and reached out, holding her hand. “Is this okay?”

“Uh-huh.” More than okay.

Neither of them looked away from each other. The TV continued the game, but she couldn’t tell you who was winning. Hell, she didn’t know who was playing.

“Come here,” Carter said, lifting his arm for her to slide closer to him.

She nearly rolled over but settled on moving the way she was so she could breathe him in. She didn’t know why he suddenly decided he wanted her close, but she wasn’t about to question it.

As she slid in, Carter wrapped his arm that had been holding her hand around her, pulling her even closer. Satisfied that she couldn’t get any closer to him than she was, he brought that hand up to her cheek, stroking it with his thumb.

Ashley sighed and closed her eyes, enjoying his touch and anything else he wanted to do. When his lips found hers, she froze, surprised.

“Is this okay?” he asked again.

She didn’t answer, instead closing her eyes back and kissing him again. Carter’s hand slid from her cheek to her hair as his tongue teased her lips open.

She eagerly let him deepen the kiss, living for this moment and praying for it to never end. As much as she willed his hand to explore her, to give her some sort of relief from the last several days cooped up with one another, he held her to the kiss only.

Ashley raised her arm, wrapping it around him and holding him close. Their connection was more than she’d ever felt before. Carter groaned as she accidentally rocked against his erection.

Pulling away, Carter looked at her and then tucked her head into his chest. “We have to stop.”

She attempted to kiss him again, but he pulled farther away.

“Ashley, we can’t do this. I’m sorry.”

“What?” she managed.

“This is so inappropriate, and you’ve been through a lot. I shouldn’t be taking advantage of you.” He rolled away from her and sat up. “I’ll make a pallet on the floor. You should get some sleep.”

Pissed, Ashley sat up. “Are you serious right now?”

“Please don’t. I know I took things too far and I’m sorry.” He went to the closet and pulled out the extra linens that were stored there.

“You would rather sleep on the floor than in the bed with me?” She couldn’t process the 180 that man had just pulled.

“Don’t. I’m trying to make things right.”

“Did I say you did anything wrong?”

He sighed and just stood there with his head down like a schoolboy in some kind of trouble.

“Fine. If you want to sleep on the floor, then be my guest. This is ridiculous.”

“I can’t lie there with you and keep my hands to myself.” His admission was full of guilt, and as much as she wanted to fight with him, he seemed to be doing the fighting all alone.

“Did I ask you to? Did I give you any indication that I wanted you to stop touching me?”

“No. But you are still reeling from everything that’s happened and I’m taking advantage. You’ll thank me later for not taking things too far.”

“Ugh!” She threw a pillow at him. “If you would have kissed me at any point in the cabin, I wouldn’t have pushed you away, and now you are telling me what I think? I hadn’t changed my mind about what could happen here until right now. Sleep on the floor if you want, or get back in bed. I promise I won’t touch you.”

She rolled over and pulled the blankets up above her face. She didn’t care where he slept, or so she told herself. If he wanted to be uncomfortable instead of here with her, then she hoped his back hurt like the devil in the morning.

“Ashley,” he pleaded. “Like it or not, I’m here to keep you safe and this is overstepping on my part. I can’t do that to you or your family.”

“They aren’t here, Carter. If I thought for a second you were taking advantage of me, I’d stop you. Clearly, I wanted to kiss you, too. Pick a place and lie down, your celibacy is safe with me.” Ashley didn’t pull the covers off her face, didn’t look over at him.

He heaved a sigh, and she felt him lie back on the bed. The blankets didn’t move, and he made no attempt to get under the covers with her.

Just as well, she told herself. She didn’t need him anyway. When this was over, she would walk away and not think about him again.

It didn’t matter that she knew she was lying to herself. Nothing mattered except the anger she was going to hold onto because if she didn’t, she’d realize how she’d just embarrassed herself by all but begging this man to kiss her.