Chapter 9

9

M istake! A voice in the back of Felicity’s head was shouting the word over and over as she watched Albright transform right in front of her eyes.

Mistake, mistake, mistake!

What had she been thinking?

She hadn’t. She hadn’t used her brain at all. She’d gotten swept away by the moment. A bolt of blasted hope had hit her square between the eyes, sure as lightning.

But now, seeing this dark hardness in his eyes—so unfamiliar, so cold—she made her smile even brighter and forced a laugh. “Well, you mustn’t look as though I’ve just asked you to commit a crime.”

Her heart was aching, but she laughed again. She was terribly good at laughing in the face of pain, and right now that skill was a godsend. “Really, Albright. So serious.”

His eyes narrowed slightly, and Felicity felt as though she were talking to a stranger. “Marriage is a serious matter.”

It started to make sense then, and that hope she’d felt disappeared, snuffed out like a candle in the wind. It wasn’t disappointment that made her stomach fall to her feet. It was something that made no sense.

It was something so much worse.

It was no longer about what she wanted, but about Albright. About what he wanted. Who he wanted…and why. She swallowed hard, and some distant part of her marveled at the way her smile stayed true.

His jaw worked and she would have taken his heated anger any day over the coldness in his eyes as he said, “Marriage is nothing to make light of, Miss McGovern.”

She felt so very small. “No, of course you’re right. Forgive me.”

He seemed to be looking right through her. Maybe he was seeing Ann, the woman he’d actually wished to marry. Or no…his wife. The woman he’d sworn his heart to.

The woman who’d have his heart forevermore.

She swallowed a thick lump. What would it be like to be loved like that? To know that even after you passed, you lived on in someone’s heart?

No, not just someone’s heart, this man’s heart. A man who was so kind and good and loyal and true.

And he believed she’d just made a mockery of that devotion.

The urge to cry came on so quickly, it shocked her. She did not cry.

She shifted away from the tree, itching to run away. But she also did not run. Ever.

And yet here she was, on the verge of tears, and looking for a chance to flee.

She swallowed hard and shifted away once more. “I do apologize for making light of such a serious topic.” Her voice sounded stilted to her own ears, but she forced herself to continue. “Please, accept my apologies. And…” She held up the parchment that had been all but forgotten this past hour during their conversation. “And thank you for including me in your investigation.”

“Felicity,” he started, his voice a low rumble.

But she didn’t want to hear any lectures on the topic of marriage, and she couldn’t bear to hear him expound upon all the reasons he would not wish to marry her, in particular.

He did not love her, and he couldn’t imagine ever loving her. That much was clear.

She had to clear her throat to continue. “If you’ll excuse me, I should go. We came close to disaster just now and I should not wish to tempt fate by staying out here any longer.”

He made a move in her direction, but she turned and fled before he could stop her to say…what?

She didn’t know. She didn’t care. Anything he said now would only make her feel worse.

She slipped into the house and padded toward her room, navigating the dark hallways with ease.

It seemed to her in this moment that she was forever creeping about in the dark. Always spying on others or learning to go undetected so she might have her freedom.

Perhaps she’d missed her calling. A wry smile curved her lips as she headed up the stairs. She swiped away a tear as she hitched up her skirts and deftly avoided the creaking stairs that would give her away.

She’d always suspected she’d been born to the wrong family and the wrong life. A gently bred young lady? Ha! She’d never fit that role. And the wife of a handsome young gentleman was not for her either. Just look at Albright’s horrified reaction.

But wife to a surly old brute like Bargedale?

She stilled on the steps as her stomach dipped and weaved with dread.

No. She lifted her chin and continued her climb. That was not for her either.

She would find a way to avoid that fate. By the time she reached her chambers and slipped inside, resolve had filled that empty space in her chest, and determination washed away the last of her tears.

She lay awake for hours as her thoughts spun and her mind readjusted to this new fact.

She would not marry Bargedale. No matter what she must do. No matter the consequences. She’d find another future, a different way forward, even if it meant she was disowned and an outcast.

But even as sleep finally claimed her, she had not settled on a plan.

How could she avoid such a fate?

And, most importantly, how could she find her freedom instead?

Days later she was no closer to a plan, though she had the overwhelming sense that it was coming together. Like a jigsaw puzzle scattered on the floor, all of the pieces were there just waiting to be fitted together.

Everson. His devious plans. Her great uncle who needed her protection from Everson—even if he did not know it.

Albright.

No, she gave her head a shake. Albright had no part in her plans. She refused to think of him any longer. He did not care for her, and while she might care for him, it was her future at stake. She couldn’t waste time worrying about him. He did not want her, let alone need her.

“Felicity?” Meg’s voice called her out of her wandering thoughts.

Felicity blinked and realized belatedly that Meg, Jane, and Ann were all staring at her.

She smiled. “My apologies. You’ve caught me daydreaming. Did you ask me something?”

The others shared a look that held more concern than she could bear. So she forced her smile even wider. “Come now, I may be distracted, but there’s no need to fret.” She flounced down on her great uncle’s settee beside Jane and patted her knee reassuringly. “Now, what did I miss?”

“Felicity,” Ann started slowly. “Is there anything…amiss?”

Felicity didn’t let her smile falter. “Why would there be anything amiss?”

Meg frowned. “Have you been unwell? Carver said that Albright tried to visit and was turned away because you were not feeling well.”

“Ah.” Felicity laughed. “Forgive me for making you worry. I simply was not up for company. Particularly not Albright.” She shook her head. “He is kind enough, undoubtedly, but I cannot bear too much time in his company, I’m afraid.”

The words rang true—because they were true—and Felicity took some pride in the fact that she’d thus far managed to avoid lying to her friends. She truly disliked lying, and particularly to those she loved.

Jane’s brows furrowed. “I thought you and Albright were working together to catch Everson. Was that not what you wished for?”

“Indeed. However, I believe Albright and I have different ideas on how such a task ought to be accomplished.”

There. She clasped her hands in her lap with a smug smile. She’d done it again. Yes, they shared a desire to see justice served, but she could not imagine their tactics would be the same.

Albright was so careful. So patient. That was not her at all. Felicity sniffed and gave a sharp nod. No, indeed. It was likely for the best he’d been so horrified at the thought of marriage. Why, they wouldn’t get on at all.

He was likely even now watching Everson, waiting patiently for him to fleece the ton and take off for parts unknown so he’d have the evidence necessary to arrest him.

If it were up to her…

Her smile faltered. If it were up to her, what would she do?

A nagging sensation was tugging at her as it had been for the last two days since her awful encounter with Albright. And it was back now in full force, that feeling like it all connected. As though this puzzle could be completed if she just rearranged the pieces. Perhaps looked at it all from a different angle…

She tilted her head to the side, her gaze distant as if she might actually see the moving pieces if she stared long enough.

Meg cleared her throat. “Felicity? Did Albright…offend you in some way?”

“Kal seems to think he wishes to apologize,” Ann added.

Felicity knew they were speaking to her, and she ought to respond. But she was so close to making this connection. And then sweet, quiet Jane spoke up. “Marlin’s worried they’ve put you in too much danger with the Everson matter. I believe he’d like to apologize as well.”

Lord Marlin.

Everson.

Felicity getting too close…

Her initial conversations with Albright came back to her all at once, as if a dam was lifted. The reasons she’d argued to be a part of the investigation in the first place. Her own words came back to her.

You do realize that Mr. Everson has of late been more flirtatious than ever with the young debutantes of the ton , do you not? Honestly, I’m surprised I wasn’t first on his list.

And then, What’s to stop him from taking investment money from unsuspecting gentlemen like my uncle and disappearing with it?

And then her uncle’s voice was in her head. You’ve never been one to sit and sulk when you don’t get your way. You’re a doer. An action taker.

She shot up off the settee so suddenly, Jane gave a start.

“Felicity?” Ann sounded wary.

“She has that look in her eyes,” Meg said. She was talking about Felicity.

“Am I the only one afraid of that look?” Jane asked.

“Definitely not,” Ann said.

They were in jest. Mostly. Or…maybe they weren’t. Didn’t matter. Felicity began to pace the room, aware of her friends’ watchful stares all the while.

It was such an odd mix of emotions that filled her as the puzzle pieces fit into place.

Determination. Fear. Excitement. The occasional flicker of dread as she considered all the possible endings.

And yes, perhaps some of that dread had to do with Albright’s reaction when he found out.

She stopped pacing to stare out the window at the gray cloudy sky.

She could not worry about Albright’s disappointment in her. She owed him nothing.

All that mattered now was saving her uncle and the other unsuspecting marks from Everson’s plans—and potentially saving herself in the process.

And this plan she was concocting…it could do both, if she played her cards right. At the very best, it might save her uncle.

The trick was to time it so no one could stop her.

She bit her lip. And by no one, she meant Albright.

“Please talk to us, Felicity,” Meg said.

Felicity turned, her attention fixed on Jane. “Would you relay a message for me, Jane? I need to get word to Lord Marlin…”