29. Emily

29

EMILY

I was nervous as I dressed for work. My skirts were all just slightly too tight, which made them snug across my hips. I knew Olivia would judge me, but I had no choice. Until I found some maternity clothes, I had to make do with outfits that were too tight. It wasn’t any tighter than a pair of skinny jeans, but it wasn’t exactly professional, either. I checked myself out in the mirror. The extra snugness accentuated the curve of my ass. I thought it was sexy, but sexy wasn’t how I was supposed to look at work.

Instead of the jacket that went with my suit, I chose a sweater that hung low, covering most of my backside. It was a bit warm for a sweater, but it would be better than hearing the lecture. It also was a bit loose around the middle, which would hide the tiny bulge I had. Though, I did stand and look in the mirror as I pulled the outfit tight against my stomach to see how my body was changing. The nurse at the clinic was right. I was well on my way to showing quite early.

Shaking the sweater out so it hung loosely again, I put on some earrings, a touch of makeup, and picked up my purse. With a new routine of regular tiny meals and the addition of the anti-nausea medicine, I felt well enough to work. I also felt badly for missing so many days, and I was ready to jump back in the saddle and catch up on any missed assignments Daniel had for me.

I was eager to speak with him too, maybe over lunch, and discuss exactly why I had been absent. He hadn’t called or texted me, which made me think he was very upset, but I knew when I told him what was going on, he’d understand why I hadn’t been at work. I just hoped that he’d also be happy about the babies and not angry with me for delaying telling him. And as for the bit about his not seeing himself as a father, well, he’d have to get over that. Like it or not, he was going to be a father. Even if he didn’t want a relationship with me.

The subway was packed, standing room only, and my feet hurt already from the walk to the station. I wished I was really showing. Maybe one of the men seated around me would give up his seat, but no one did. So I stood, clinging to the pole in the center of the aisle as the train took me to my station. I arrived early, no rushing to the building, so I stopped and got Daniel his favorite blend of coffee and one for myself as well. I smiled as I thought about seeing him again. God, I’d missed him.

But when the elevator doors slid open and I saw Grace and Michael standing near reception, I knew something was off. They were always locked in their offices hard at work, or not even in for the day when I arrived. They straightened, ended their hushed conversation, and turned to face me as I stepped off the elevator. Fear trickled down my spine as Grace spoke.

“Ms. Kline, we’d like to speak to you for a moment.” She used a very professional voice, hands folded in front of her waist.

“Uh… sure,” I said, glancing between her face and Michael’s. Jill was there instantly, taking Daniel’s coffee from my hand. It had his name written on it, so it was obvious where it went.

“I’ll take this in for you,” she said, grimacing and offering a look of compassion. When she walked away, I addressed Michael.

“What is it, sir?” My hand trembled, coffee sloshing, and I grasped both hands around the paper cup.

“Emily, while we both agree that your work here has been done well and you’ve made very few mistakes, your conduct has been very unprofessional. Unbecoming, even.” Michael’s voice sounded robotic, monotone. He had no emotion on his face, not even a furrowed brow. “We have decided to terminate you effective immediately. Jill has taken the liberty of cleaning out your desk for you.”

Grace rounded the end of the reception desk and picked up a box and carried it over to me. The few things I had in my desk were all in this box. I stared into it as I accepted it from her in shock. “What?”

“Ms. Kline,” Grace said sternly, “it came to our knowledge that your family has threatened a lawsuit against the firm and against Mr. Jacobs. While we cannot prevent you or your family from pursuing any legal action you may feel is warranted, given Mr. Jacobs’s interaction with you in the privacy of his office, we do strongly recommend that you reconsider litigation. It will not end well for you.”

“Because we do respect your financial situation,” Michael cut in, “we are prepared to offer six months’ salary in addition to your final weekly compensation check. We hope this affords you plenty of time to arrange a new job. And Olivia will write you a professional letter of recommendation.”

I felt dizzy. I blinked my eyes as they faded from light to dark, my vision blurring. My blood pressure had to be skyrocketing. “My family did what?” I mumbled. “I have to see Dan.”

“I’m sorry, Ms. Kline, but contact with Mr. Jacobs is off limits now. You may not speak to him, and it is strongly recommended that you do not try to call him, email, or send text messages. Any attempt on your part to communicate with him will be considered hostile, and we will be forced to defend him.”

“But I?—”

“I’m sure you may be confused, but we take threats seriously. If you need further information as to the nature of this threat, you should speak with your sister, Evelyn.” Grace was cold, her tone exacting.

I blinked slowly and looked up at her face. I had no idea what she was talking about, but I didn’t put it past Evelyn to do something like this. I felt like I was going to pass out, my head swimming. “Please, I think this is a big misunderstanding. I need to speak with Daniel.”

“Mr. Jacobs is in a meeting. You are not to speak to him or try to contact him.” Michael reached into his pocket and pulled out a crisp sheet of paper folded in thirds. He dropped it in the box and continued. “This is a restraining order, filed last week against you. If you attempt to make contact with him, set foot on his property or that of the firm, you can be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.”

I knew they didn’t like me, but they were taking this a bit too far. “Guys, I swear, this is just a misunderstanding.” I felt tears brimming in my eyes and had the urge to drop the box and rush past them. I needed to see Dan.

Michael turned his back and walked off, and Grace put her hands out and herded me back into the elevator, which was being held open by Olivia, whom I hadn’t even seen walk up. “I understand this is difficult, Emily, but please, we are trying to protect Dan.” Olivia talked in comforting tones. I blinked and tears streamed down my cheeks. “Please just respect him at this time, alright? I’m sure eventually, things will calm down and he will be open to hearing from you.”

The doors slid shut, obscuring my view, and the elevator descended. What the hell just happened? I stood there sobbing as the doors opened to a different floor, and the people ready to join me stood back, staring. They didn’t get in the elevator, and I was relieved. I rode the thing to the ground floor and found a bench outside the building to sit down on. When he hadn’t contacted me, I assumed he was upset, but I never thought this would be his response. He didn’t even know I was pregnant yet, and how would I tell him now? They would file a suit against me? For telling him I was having his baby?

The thought made me cry harder. I was so angry I pulled out my phone and dialed Evelyn’s number. Her voice was groggy when she answered, like I had awakened her, but I didn’t care.

“Em? It’s early. What’s wrong?”

“Goddammit, Eve! What the hell have you done? You told Daniel I was going to sue him? Do you even know what is happening? I’m fired. I have no job now, thanks to you. I’m fucking pregnant, and I have no job.”

A few people passing by stared at me, and when I glared at them they looked away. I was thankful I didn’t know any of them, that they walked right past the law building and didn’t enter. It didn’t matter that I was sitting on a bench in public, raging at my sister. No one in this town knew me, and I had nothing to lose.

“Em, I?—”

“I hate you, Evelyn. Okay? You have no idea what you’ve done. I needed him. I love him. I can’t do this without him.” I cried so hard I thought I’d throw up. I didn’t want a severance package. I wanted a family.

“Emily, please. Stop this. You come stay with me. I’ll take care of you.”

“You think I’d even consider that? You ruined my life. I never told you to go talk to him. You had no right to even say a word to him, and you told him I was going to sue. For what? Everything we did was consensual. I wanted it as much as he did.”

“He was using you.” Evelyn’s voice grew hostile. She didn’t care about me. She just wanted to be right. She couldn’t stand that I could find love with someone powerful and wealthy, and she was jealous.

“You can’t use someone who wants what you’re asking. That’s not abuse.” I hung up, too angry to continue talking to her. I’d say something I’d regret later on.

The box wasn’t heavy, but my feet still hurt. I limped to the station, found the first train headed the right way, and slumped into a seat. An elderly man on the train a few rows away from me pulled a handkerchief out and handed it to me without a word. I took it and sobbed, blowing my nose hard in the small, thin cloth. It was something Dan would have done for me, or for any woman. He was kind like that.

That only made me cry harder.

This was why he hadn’t responded to me or answered. He’d seen how I lived, my apartment, how poor I was, and he’d decided to cut me off. Only he didn’t even have the guts to cut me off himself. He had to have his staff do it for him. And the worst part was, he told me the only thing that would end our relationship was a lie, but I hadn’t lied. Unless Evelyn had told him I was pregnant too, which meant he knew and that was why he’d ended things.

My head hurt. My heart hurt. I wanted to go to sleep and not wake up for months, until my heart healed. This couldn’t have been Daniel’s doing. He’d never treat me like this. Or maybe that was just an imagination I’d had of him and Evelyn had actually been right. If he were the sexist bigot Evelyn told me he was, this was exactly how he’d act, and I’d just gone off on her.

I was so confused, so overwhelmed. My mind rehearsed a million things I’d say to him if he called me. I replayed every conversation we’d had over the past few weeks in my head, trying to make sense of things, but nothing made sense.

By the time I got home, I was a complete wreck. The handkerchief donated to my sob-fest was soaked in snot and tears. I threw it away and left the box of my things on the counter before stripping off and climbing into bed in just my bra and panties.

Why hadn’t I told him immediately when I found out? Why had I been so scared of his knowing I was pregnant? Now that I had the confidence to tell him, it was too late. He didn't want me. Maybe he never wanted me for anything other than an easy lay, and I had been so easy. I never even played hard to get. I cradled my stomach and let the tears and wails of anger and pain pour out of me. What on earth would I do now?