4. Matvey

4

MATVEY

I'm startled awake by someone shaking my arm. "Matvey," my brother's voice calls, "wake up. Something's happened."

I pull myself up and check my watch: 2:33 A.M.

"It's the dead of fucking night," I snarl. My head's pounding with a hangover; it hasn't been an hour since I've actually managed to fall asleep. "This better be good."

"It's about April."

I freeze. "You found her?"

That's when I finally take stock of Yuri's appearance: his mussed hair, his trembling hands. His eyes, wide with panic.

"Brother, what's wrong?"

I'm terrified. For the first time since that day at the hospital, I remember what fear tastes like.

Yuri swallows. "There's something I have to tell you."

Then he speaks.

"Yuri. It's me. I need your help."

I got her call at the wedding. Petra was off entertaining guests, and I'd lost sight of you in the crowd. I figured she was calling me because she couldn't reach you, so I started looking for you.

But then she asked me to come alone.

She gave me a hospital's name. That's the kind of thing no one wants to hear on a phone call. So I got there as soon as I could.

That's when I saw them.

April, in her hospital bed, holding a bundle in her arms. I was so happy for her—for you both. I got closer to see the baby; I wanted to know if she looked like you.

Then April said, "I need you to help me hide."

At first, I didn't understand. I couldn't understand. Why would April want to get away? Why would she want to hide your kid from you?

Then she told me.

She told me about what had happened between you two. That you told her you'd marry Petra and refused to explain yourself. That she was pregnant with your legitimate heir.

You can imagine how I felt then.

I was so selfish, Matvey. I asked you to keep that secret; to marry Petra so she could be safe. So that my child could be safe.

I wasn't thinking of April when I did.

But now, she was staring at me, begging me to understand. Begging me to help her.

So I did.

I brought her the discharge papers. I walked her to the car. I held her up the whole way there, watching her grit her teeth against the pain.

Then I took her to the penthouse. I helped her pack a getaway bag. I got the baby's things, all the stuff she'd need on the run. I watched April write that letter.

I don't know what I was thinking, Motya. Only that the guilt was tearing me apart. The guilt of ruining her life. The guilt of ruining yours.

When I took them away, I didn't think it would be forever.

I thought April just needed a little time. A little space. To think, to heal. But the days turned into weeks.

I saw you fall apart. I saw you turn the city upside down looking for them, then the state, then the country. I saw you stop sleeping. I saw you start drinking.

But I couldn't tell you where she was. I'd made her a promise. After forcing you to keep yours, how could I break mine?

I still thought she'd come around one day.

I hid her in a motel. Every time you ordered to sweep the area, I made sure it was me who handled it. I brought her food, clothes, medicine. I gave her a gun to keep herself safe.

I tried to give her money, but she wouldn't take it. "You've already done so much," she'd tell me. I wanted to scream.

I don't expect you to forgive me. I don't expect you to tell me I did the right thing. Hell, I don't expect you to ever speak to me again after this.

But can you at least understand why I did it?

I don't let Yuri get one more word out.

I slam him into a wall, hard. "You traitor," I spit into his face.

"I'm sorry" is all Yuri says.

I clench my hands around his throat, trembling with rage. "You're sorry?" I snarl. "You took my child away from me, and now, you're fucking sorry ?"

"I didn't know what else to do," he croaks, voice shaking. "It was my fault. What was I supposed to do?"

"You were supposed to come to me !" I roar. "You were supposed to tell me !"

Yuri's throat bobs up and down. I can feel the motion around my hands, can feel the rabbit-quick pulse of his blood against mine. Traitor, traitor, traitor. "You didn't see her in that room, Matvey."

"Damn right I fucking didn't!"

"She needed to leave. She needed to get away?—"

"Shut up!" I bellow, making my grip tighter, tighter, tighter . "You don't get to talk about her! You don't get to?—"

"She was scared!" he yells. "She was scared of you !"

That stops me in my tracks. Scared. Is that how I made her feel? Scared of talking to me, of seeing me? Scared of letting me raise her baby?

Your baby , the possessive voice inside me growls. That was your baby, too.

"You can hate me afterward," Yuri chokes with the last of his voice. "She's in danger now. They took her. They took both of them."

My blood freezes.

April's in danger. My child is in danger.

The second it sinks in, I drop Yuri to the ground. It doesn't matter how badly I want to beat his face to a pulp. How badly I want to take revenge on the brother who betrayed me. Who betrayed his own blood.

Right now, only one thing matters. "Where?" I demand.

"I'll take you," Yuri gasps, clutching at the red imprint of my hands.

"Not a fucking chance."

"It's in the middle of nowhere," he protests. "I don't need to drive, but let me guide you there."

"I said?—"

"Please," Yuri begs. "Just… trust me."

A part of me wants to keep arguing. I'm dying to punch the answers out of this man I once called my brother. This man who now dares speak to me about trust.

But time is ticking, and we've already wasted far too much of it.

"So be it," I reply icily.

"Thank y?—"

"But it's the last time I do."

With that, I grab my phone and dial. "Grisha. Meet me at my loft. It's an emergency."

Then I train my cold gaze on Yuri. "Well?" I demand, voice filled with spite. "Lead the way, brother. "