17. Kenzie

17

KENZIE

K enzie spent the next day at the local ballet theatre, losing herself in the last days of the production’s preparation with her grandmother.

Somehow, even the awkward ending to her day with Aidan couldn’t keep her down when she was in the cool, dark theatre, surrounded by happy people.

Kenzie was working with the “Waltz of the Flowers” dancers quietly in the back, while the dress run-through went along onstage.

A crew of women stood at the ready to make last minute costume adjustments as the dancers moved through their parts in the space and Grandma Lee stopped and started for lights and sound.

It was hard to believe that they were less than a week away from the first performance. The dancers were brimming with excitement and the crew were all smiling and working hard.

As usual, the performances were sold out, but Grandma Lee had surprised Kenzie with three tickets for the weekend.

“I thought maybe you could bring Aidan Webb and his little boy,” she suggested lightly, before heading into the fray of dancers where Kenzie couldn’t argue.

A day or two ago, Kenzie would have been thrilled to be able to offer those coveted tickets to Aidan and Walt. In her mind, Aidan was her knight in shining armor, and it would only be a matter of time before they fell madly in love.

But after that strange, reluctant air descended over him yesterday, she wasn’t feeling so sure anymore.

He hadn’t said or done a single thing to make her think that the growing bond between them was fraying. But she had felt it instantly, in spite of the pounding music and flashing lights of the arcade. It felt like a sign had suddenly lit up over his head that said, not interested.

A month ago, she hadn’t thought about the guy since high school. It was odd to feel devastated about him—all without him ever telling her that he liked her, or even that she was beautiful. Plenty of men came up and told her that after performances. She’d even had partners say it in that same awed tone, and it never failed to make her uncomfortable. But somehow, she knew it would feel different if Aidan Webb said he thought she was beautiful.

Maybe she’d just been reading too many romance novels. Of course she was seeing him as the hero. If she’d spent the week reading thrillers, she’d probably think he was a secret jewel thief or something.

A glance at her phone told her it was time to go. She had promised Mal she would help out with some gift baskets at the bakery tonight, and Mal’s friends would be there too. It would be nice to have another distraction from Aidan Webb.

She had met Valerie and Ana separately in town with Mal over the last few days, but tonight would be her first time attending a Girls’ Night event.

She looked around for Grandma Lee, but she was deep in conversation with the Nutcracker prince, so Kenzie just gave her a little wave and headed out again.

The air outside the theatre was cold and fresh. Tiny snow flurries sparkled in the streetlights and Kenzie felt like a little kid again, coming out of rehearsals and feeling like she was part of the scenery of the fairy tale herself.

She made her way to Mal’s place slowly on her crutches, drinking in the beautiful Christmas decorations on the storefronts.

The display at the jewelry shop was a dream of items from nature laid with sparkling gems. And the Victorian dollhouse in the window of the real estate office rested on a bed of cotton snow and was hung with tiny Christmas lights and bedecked with a wreath and tiny pine boughs.

At the desk behind the dollhouse, a tireless Sloane Greenfield waved to Kenzie, a pile of papers in one hand and a phone in the other. Kenzie wondered if the poor young woman would work on the actual holiday too.

The lights were all on in the bakery, though the sign read Closed . Mal and her friends, Valerie, who owned the jewelry shop and Ana, who co-owned a clothing store with her mother, were all inside, laughing and sipping from paper cups .

For a moment, it made Kenzie think of her roommates back in New York, and she felt a pang of loneliness for the nights they had spent sewing their toe shoes and watching movies, or stretching while the radio played, all the while gossiping about the ballet—who was going to fall in love, who was going to be moved up to principal dancer, who was leaving…

I might be back there soon, she told herself. Anything is possible.

Honestly though, when Kenzie herself had been moved up to principal, she had sensed a cooling off with her friends. It was awkward to wonder if they really thought she deserved it, and to know their next move would be to take bets on how long she could hold onto it.

I’m not going to think about that, she told herself. I’m going to focus on what my life could look like in Trinity Falls.

And since that life started with crossing her fingers that Mal’s crew of women would include her, she took a deep breath and headed into the bakery. But the door handle stuck when she tried to turn it, and made a loud rattling sound that had the three of them looking up to see what was going on.

Of course the door was locked. The shop was closed. Kenzie felt her cheeks heat with embarrassment and tears prickle her eyes. What a first impression.

Mal darted over and unlocked it with a big welcoming smile. But the smile disappeared when she saw the look on Kenzie’s face.

“Hey,” she said. “Are you okay?”

“Yes,” Kenzie said. “Of course. Sorry, I don’t know what’s wrong with me. ”

“Get in here,” Valerie called out. “We need to get some coffee in you so we can start on the baskets.”

“Hang on,” Mal said over her shoulder.

“I’m okay,” Kenzie told her. “Really. I just came from the ballet theatre. It was a long day. That’s all.”

“Hey,” Ana said softly, tucking her long, dark hair behind her ear. “It’s good to see you.”

“You too, Ana,” Kenzie said. “It’s been too long since I had serious girl time.”

“ Yes ,” Mal said. “There she is. Why don’t we get you off your feet, and you can let me know what kind of drink I can make you? Gingerbread latte? Peppermint mocha?”

“Chai latte?” Kenzie asked.

“Coming right up,” Mal declared, sliding behind the counter to get it started.

Ana walked Kenzie over to the long table the three women had been lounging around when she arrived. Most of the table was laden with trays of beautiful holiday treats.

“Here we go,” Ana said, taking a seat beside Valerie at the empty end of the table.

Kenzie lowered herself to the chair opposite them, marveling at how different these three women were.

Ana had a sort of refined hippie-chic style. She wore the beautiful long flowing skirts and blouses that she and her mom sold in their store, Pura Vida. Her hair was long and dark, and she was stunningly lovely without a bit of makeup. Her soft voice was echoed in the softness of her movement and her gentle smile, which could light up a room.

Valerie’s hard angles stood out beside her friend’s softness. The jewelry store owner was rail-thin, wore fashionable clothing no matter the occasion, and even her hair was cut at a sharp angle. Two slender silver bangles clicked on her arm when she moved, and Kenzie suspected that she utilized the sound to emphasize her points.

Kenzie had been a little intimidated by Valerie after their first meeting. But Mal assured her that Valerie was tough, but as loyal as they came, and that there was no one better to have in your corner when the chips were down.

“How’s The Nutcracker coming along?” Valerie asked.

“It’s amazing,” Kenzie sighed happily. “As usual.”

“Probably a little less amazing now that you’ve done it in New York,” Valerie suggested.

“Oddly, no,” Kenzie said. “In New York, it’s amazing but stressful. Here, it’s amazing but… joyful.”

“I can see that,” Ana said with a smile. “That’s your grandmother’s influence.”

“And there’s probably less pressure when the tickets aren’t a couple hundred bucks a pop and people aren’t coming from all over the world to see it,” Valerie said, nodding.

“I don’t know,” Mal called out, over the sound of the steamer. “I had to stand in line for two hours for our tickets this year.”

“You’re coming?” Kenzie asked, amazed.

“Of course we are,” Valerie said. “We always go.”

“It’s a tradition,” Ana added with a smile.

“That’s so cool,” Kenzie said, feeling personally gratified, even though she’d had almost nothing to do with this year’s production.

Mal came over and set a steaming paper cup in front of Kenzie. The sweet scent of cardamom drifted up to her, and Kenzie hummed with pleasure.

“Thank you,” she said.

“Oh, wait until you’re done packing baskets before you thank me,” Mal laughed. “It’s going to be a long night.”

“I think it’ll be fun,” Kenzie said, gazing down the table at the array of treats.

There were peppermint rolls, gingerbread boys and girls, raspberry tarts, chocolate-covered delicacies, pecan sandies, rum balls, and so many more. A stack of pretty baskets sat beside them, along with bins of tissue paper, shredded paper in a red and white candy cane style, a huge box of plastic wrap, and a bag of Christmas bows.

Mal handed out lists and put everyone to work, giving Kenzie the job of laying a tissue paper bed into each basket before the others set to work filling it.

“The only trouble with this is that our mouths will be watering the whole time,” Ana teased, as she put peppermint frosted mini-brownies into the first basket when Kenzie handed it off.

“Not to worry,” Mal said, pointing to a pastry box on the counter. “Those are the not-quite-perfect treats. We’ll feast on those when we take our first break.”

“ Yes ,” Kenzie said with a smile.

“It must be nice to get to eat whatever you want for a while,” Valerie said.

“It is,” Kenzie told her .

“I guess you have to live it up now,” Ana said sympathetically. “When you go back to New York, you’ll be down to nothing but yogurt, is that right? Is that what dancers eat?”

“Yes,” Kenzie said, laughing. “We do eat a lot of yogurt, and fruits and vegetables, and hard-boiled eggs, and whatever is high in protein and won’t slow us down. But I’m not sure I’m going back.”

“Really?” Valerie asked.

“Your leg is going to be fine,” Mal said firmly. “I’m sure of it.”

“My grandmother offered to let me run the ballet theatre with her if I stay,” Kenzie said before she could stop herself.

There was absolute silence for a moment.

“ What? ” Mal asked.

“She told me when I went over there the other day, after I left here with Natalie,” Kenzie said. “I wasn’t really ready to talk about it then, but I think I am now.”

“It’s an excellent backup plan if you can’t keep dancing,” Valerie said. “Your grandmother runs a tight ship.”

“I’m thinking of doing it either way,” Kenzie said. It felt good to say it out loud.

“Does this have anything to do with a certain Aidan Webb?” Mal asked with a furrow in her brow.

“Gosh no,” Kenzie said, shaking her head. “I have no idea what’s going on with him.”

To her absolute horror, tears threatened again, and she had to press her lips together and gaze down at the basket in her hands to stop herself from crying .

“Oh, Kenzie,” Mal said, moving to put an arm around her shoulder. “What happened?”

“We spent the day together yesterday,” Kenzie said. “It was just the two of us, for the first time. But just as things got super romantic, he… I don’t know. I guess he zoned out?”

“What were you guys doing?” Valerie asked.

“He took me to the mall,” Kenzie said. “And he got a few things for Walt, and I got everything for the family I’m sponsoring. Then he took me to the food court?—”

“The food court?” Valerie asked distastefully.

“I asked to go to the food court,” Kenzie said. “And then we went into the big snow globe. And while we were in there, I really thought he was going to kiss me.”

“Oh, wow,” Ana said.

“Isn’t that, like, a bouncy house for little kids?” Mal asked worriedly.

“It was the middle of the day, so there were no little kids,” Kenzie said. “And after that, he got my photo with Santa Claus, and we went to the arcade. And that’s when things got weird.”

“ That’s when things got weird?” Valerie echoed, her voice flat and sarcastic.

“We won a ring pop and when he looked at it… his face…” Kenzie trailed off, uncertain how to describe the way he reacted.

“He shut down?” Mal offered quietly.

“Yeah,” Kenzie sighed. “I guess he did.”

“I told you,” Mal said. “He’s the worst. I’m sorry I got you involved with him. I promise I just thought he’d do the work in the house and scram. ”

“If he’s not interested, why does he keep wanting to spend time with me?” Kenzie asked.

“It’s not that he doesn’t want to spend time with you,” Valerie said suddenly. “It’s just that he doesn’t want to date you. Think about it. Is it possible that everything you’ve done together is just stuff that he was going to do anyway?”

Kenzie opened her mouth and closed it again. Valerie was right, they’d gone to Cassidy Farm, but he would have taken Walt either way. And yesterday had been a glorified trip to run errands in the middle of the day.

“I guess so,” Kenzie said, nodding. “And I’m an idiot because I didn’t even think of that. It meant so much more than that to me.”

“You’re not an idiot,” Valerie sniffed. “He’s just a jerk.”

“He’s a single dad,” Ana pointed out. “He probably doesn’t have a lot of free time. Is it such a crime for him to mix dating with family stuff?”

“Or he just wants a friend,” Valerie said. “Someone that’s good company for running errands. There’s nothing wrong with that, if it’s what you both want. But that’s clearly not the case. The problem is that if neither of you put a label on it, then you don’t really know, and neither does he.”

“So, what would you do?” Kenzie found herself asking.

“Me?” Valerie asked with a wry smile. “I’d march right up to that big bozo and ask him if he thinks he’s dating me. And if he said yes, I’d give him a piece of my mind about how he’s been going about it. ”

“I don’t know,” Kenzie said. That definitely didn’t feel right to her.

“I say wait and see,” Ana suggested. “If he got thrown by yesterday, then the next time you hear from him I’ll bet he’ll be more clear about what he wants. If he takes you out on errands again, then he’s telling you he wants to be friends. But if he asks to take you out just to enjoy your company, then it’s definitely more.”

That made sense to Kenzie. And it seemed a lot less confrontational.

“And in the meantime, you have to decide whether you really want it to be something more,” Mal said. “He has a child, so it’s not going to be easy. And what will happen when that thing comes off?”

They all looked down at the boot on Kenzie’s foot.

“You’d better be sure you’re staying if you start something with a family man,” Mal continued. “Even if he is a big jerk, that little boy deserves some stability.”

Kenzie nodded slowly, imagining what it would be like to share her life with Walt and Aidan.

“I see what you’re doing,” Mal said in a warning tone. “You’re getting all romantic and mushy about it in your head.”

“Is there anything wrong with that?” Kenzie asked.

“You’ve spent your whole life cut off from the real world in those theatre buildings, dancing out love stories,” Mal said gently. “But real life isn’t like that. There is no prince who comes to sweep you away. Real guys aren’t so strong. They don’t have all the answers, and they don’t fall in love at first sight. Real relationships are hard work, and there are no guarantees. ”

Kenzie bit her lip and nodded. She knew her best friend was right. But she couldn’t help the soaring feeling she got when she imagined things working out with Aidan. Lately, whenever his eyes met hers, she felt like she was flying.

That wasn’t really just her imagination. Was it?

“Time for a break,” Valerie declared.

“We just got started,” Ana said.

“I think we need rum balls,” Valerie said. “Were any of them imperfect?”

“Not really, but a whole bunch of them still ended up in that box,” Mal said, laughing. “I know they’re your favorite.”

“I knew I liked you for a reason,” Valerie said, winking.

Ana laughed at the two of them and Valerie handed down the box of treats. The women passed them around, turning the conversation to their plans for the holidays.

Kenzie relaxed and joined in the fun, but in the back of her mind, she couldn’t help wondering when she would see Aidan and Walt again.

If Aidan doesn’t want to be romantically involved, maybe I won’t hear from him again at all. Maybe yesterday was just too much…

No treat was sweet enough to take away the ache of that thought.