Chapter Seven

Cassie

My reflection stares back at me in the mirror of the garden bathroom, revealing my flushed face and swollen lips.

Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!

What the hell? How could I have let this happen? I think, my heart racing as I pace back and forth in the bathroom.

My lips tremble slightly, tingling a bit.

That kiss. It was consuming and visceral, as if he was licking his way into my soul, speaking directly to my heart, finding the innermost, vulnerable parts of myself and devouring them.

The way I acted…. it was so out of character. It was as if something had taken over my body. It was like I wasn't in control. The energy between us was charged with an arousal that I had never felt before.

It was reckless and spontaneous. It was everything that I'm not.

My breasts tighten against the bodice of my dress, which hugs me like a second skin. I smooth down the satin fabric, trying to make my appearance more appropriate.

The low light in the bathroom casts a dim glow on my pale skin, highlighting the desire in my eyes. My appearance throws me off.

Closing my eyes for a minute, I inhale and exhale, taking in one breath at a time while rubbing my thumb against my wrist.

It was a trick my mother taught me. It always made me calm in situations like these.

I had never acted like that before. It was as if something primal awakened in me, urging me to throw caution into the wind.

The air buzzes with electricity, complementing the chaos I feel within me. I place my hands on the sink, the cold ceramic a nice contrast to the heat within me.

My body feels like it's on fire. My hair clings to my skin, sweat trickling from my neck and over my shoulder blades. My underarms are damp.

I can't believe I just had my first kiss with the very first man I came across in the garden. It's a decision that a sane me would have never made.

I can still feel the way his grip felt around me. It was cautious, but firm. I can still feel the hardness of him melting into my soft contours. I think of the way his pheromones took over my senses.

He felt and smelled like a true man. His body was all ridges and contours of hard muscles. His hand, which was hard and rough, felt nice pressing against my hips, caressing my face, almost as if he was trying to imprint me into his memory.

The moans and grunts that escaped his mouth still rang in my ear. I remember how powerful I felt in that moment to be able to extract such sounds from a man like that.

I thought of the way his hands had felt on my thighs, confident and comfortable. Rubbing and grabbing, it felt like he was touching something familiar.

It wasn't only him, though. I whimpered and groaned like a wolf in heat. If it was possible, I could have sunk into him, desperate to reach beneath his skin.

He made me feel alive.

I have always had sexual urges. They were a normal occurrence for me. But I had never felt the need to act on them. I couldn't.

It didn't have to do with the fact that no one was even attracted to me in that manner. It had to do with the fact that I didn't want to.

When girls my age talked about their mates or the intense feelings they experienced while with their respective partners, I stayed mute.

Some snickered while I passed. I heard the whispers about who would want to be with me. They called me a weakling, a burden, sickly .

A deeper part of me once felt sad, hoping and longing for something I would never get to experience. Who would want to even be with someone as sickly as me? So, I shoved it all deep into a corner of my mind that I couldn't reach.

But all that came crashing down because of him. He only had to look at me once, and I jumped his bones— literally.

The residue of his taste lingers in my mouth, proof of how long we kissed for. I rub my thighs together and let out an involuntary moan.

I feel the slickness in between my thighs, a testament to the attraction I felt toward him. It doesn't seem to be stopping. My heart races, and my skin prickles with an unfamiliar heat. It feels like something is trying to tear out of my skin.

Swallowing hard, my throat constricts painfully as I gag and throw up.

I look down at the black bile in the sink. What the actual fuck? Scrunching up my nose, I turn on the tap and watch as it goes down the drain.

This must be a side effect of having avoided taking my last pill. I need more medicine now before I end up doing another thing that I might regret.

Swallowing hard, I reach into my purse with trembling hands, looking for the one thing I know will help me. My pill. But as I pull it out, the door to the garden's bathroom slams open, making me jump slightly. I'm face to face with Leila, her eyes ablaze with fury.

Leila is slightly taller than I am, and there's an air of superiority around her. The combination isn't helping my nerves. Leila is walking toward me with a murderous look in her eyes.

The air is filled with the scent of chocolate and cinnamon… her scent…

"Slut!" she spits, the harsh word slicing through the air. "Throwing yourself at my intended, just like the whore you are."

Oh, so he was to be her husband ?

"You know, I didn't think you were so desperate to find a man that would show you a little semblance of affection that you'd try to get with Ares."

Ares . His name echoes in my mind, flashbacks of our unexpected kiss racing through my thoughts. I can't believe I kissed a betrothed man.

My heart clenches, the realization hitting me like a blow. I can still taste the sweetness of his pheromones on my lips, but he isn't mine. He's promised to another female.

But why would he kiss me if he belonged to her? I thought Alphas were known for their fierce loyalty. But I guess that rule doesn't apply to him.

He seemed like the type of man who always had everyone cowering in his presence. He looked like someone who dared to do whatever the fuck he wanted without caring about the consequences of his actions, unlike me.

I always made sure to think my thoughts through carefully before acting on them. I couldn't risk being spontaneous and getting myself and my mother into trouble.

We already had enough things to deal with, and being on bad terms with Leila would only add to the shit-ton of things happening to us right now.

My fists tighten into a ball., What the actual hell was I thinking? Almost having sex with a random person? Not just a random person, but an Alpha? Who's marrying Leila?

It goes against every bit of my moral compass.

Something inside me can't help but blame him, too. He's an Alpha and should have some semblance of self-control. He should have stopped that from happening instead of giving into the primal desire that sparked between us.

I pride myself on being a rule follower. I speak the right way, move the right way, avoid certain people, keep my head down, don't speak unless spoken to. I don't draw unnecessary attention to myself.

It was how I had managed to stay under the radar for most of my life, but now, my cover was completely blown.

I cringe inwardly, remembering Leila's scream when she found us, her husband-to-be kissing another woman.

If only he wasn't promised to her….

I furrow my brow at the thought. Why should I care if he's promised to her? He's a nobody to me and it will stay like that. Men like him don't look for women like me. They don't even know we exist.

So why do I feel bitter and sad about that fact? Why does my heart tighten in this strange way? What was I expecting? That I was supposed to be betrothed to him? That what we had together was enough for him to magically decide to be with me? I almost laugh at the absurdity.

He was probably just looking for an empty hole to fuck, and I just happened to be there.

We were from different worlds and it should stay that way.

I gasp silently as I suddenly feel a painful pang in my heart, almost like I'm about to have a heart attack. I grab my chest, turning away, my gaze falling on the pill bottle on the counter. I need it now or never.

"Don't you have anything to say? Are you seriously ignoring me right now?" Leila's shrill voice fills the room, making my eardrums ring.

"I didn't know he was your man, Leila." I manage to say calmly. "I'm sorry it happened, but it wasn't entirely my fault."

She scoffs loudly, crossing her arms. "So, does that excuse you from spreading your legs like a little whore?"

I clench my jaw, willing myself to stay put. It would be stupid to provoke Leila right now, considering the fact that she's much stronger than I am.

"I'm talking to you! Stop fucking ignoring me. Who the fuck do you think you are?" Leila yells, her entire being trembling with rage.

"Shit," I murmur silently, holding my head in my hands. A buzzing sound fills my head, making the earth sway.

Swallowing hard, I stretch my arm forward in a bid to clasp the pill bottle, but it happens so fast.

Leila lunges at me, fingers tangled in my hair. The world spins as she twirls me around, and her palm connects with my cheek in a heavy slap that sends a shockwave through my body. The pill bottle clatters out of my hand, the last pill falling to the floor.

I stumble, my legs giving way as I crumble to the ground. Pain radiates from my cheek, but it's nothing compared to the emotional turmoil within me. Leila continues, her voice tinged with rage, calling me all sorts of names. Weakling , worthless , desperate .

My eyes well up with tears as I fight to stay conscious, my vision blurring.

A scene from the past forms in my mind. In it, I had to watch my mom being berated for not heating up Leila's meal. I hid behind the metal door at the entrance of the kitchen, watching my mom, head bowed, getting insulted by Leila's mother.

It was the first time I felt a deep surge of injustice within me, but it was also the first time I realized that I couldn't do anything about this problem, even as I watched my mom get treated like the dirt on Mrs. Kaye's shoe.

I realized what power really meant and how different dynamics of power were made to favor the rich and powerful in society.

So, I learned to stay mute. I learned to bite my tongue even while being mistreated. It was the only way for my mom to keep her job and keep a roof over our heads.

Leila seems to have been caught a little bit off guard. She stoops to pick up my fallen pill as she says, "I knew you were a sickly weakling, but you're that weak?"

I can hear the surprise in her voice. After all, it is her first time seeing me so helpless and distraught.

I try to crawl toward the pill, but my limbs fail me. Darkness creeps in at the corner of my eyes, Leila's voice a distant echo.

"What kind of illness would make a wolf this weak? I didn't even hit you that hard," she's muttering half to herself as she lifts the pill as though to give it to me. I can see slight regret and worry on her face as she tries to help me, but then she freezes completely, her gaze on the pill while I am still trying to reach out for it.

Why did she stop?

"Leila… please…" I manage to choke out, straining to reach her hand.

She looks back up at me as darkness begins to fill my vision, and her expression is the last thing I see as I pass out.

It was one of horror.