Chapter 8

Chapter 8

As Caroline should have expected, William did not give her much time to get used to the idea of marrying Sebastian Fairchild. In fact, the announcement of Caroline and Sebastian's engagement spread through the ton like wildfire. Of course, William Wentworth wasted no time in declaring that the pair had been privately engaged for weeks—claiming that this had been kept secret due to the Wentworth family's desire for privacy.

"We are not people who are fond of the gossip mill," he stated firmly to everyone, "and we thought that an announcement was unnecessary but now, with the two of them having been caught together so indiscreetly we had to admit that they were about to get married all along," he explained, the lie rolling off his tongue with practiced ease.

Caroline, however, noticed quite quickly that this lie did little to quell the whispers and speculative glances that followed her wherever she went. For her part, she felt as though she were trapped in a nightmare—one from which she could not awaken.

She had always known that one day she'd marry. It was what was expected. However, marrying under the shadow of a scandal, especially one involving her sister, meant that her mother blatantly refused to share with her the realities of marriage—leaving Caroline to reach for the hidden stash of novels she kept tucked away beneath her marriage. Her heart ached as she reached for one in particular, remembering how often she and Beatrice had giggled over it in secret.

She'd always been too shy to read it all the way through—merely skimming certain pages as her cheeks tinted crimson with the words. Now though, without her mother's guidance, she scanned the pages desperately—hopeful for any hint of what she might expect from her marital bed.

Caroline's cheeks flushed with heat as her eyes traveled over the pages—her pulse quickening at the descriptions of heaving bosoms and throbbing manhoods, of stolen kisses and wanton caresses. The heroine, an innocent maiden not unlike herself, trembled with longing as a rugged lover lay her down upon the bed—his hands roaming over her curves with eager abandon.

Would this… would this be her marriage?

Caroline squirmed uncomfortably at this vivid image, pressing her thighs together. Though she did not want to entertain the thought, she could not help but imagine the touch of Sebastian's fingers on her skin, the press of his lips against her own. Even as the thought terrified her, it filled her with an aching desire.

She slammed the book shut quickly and tucked it back into its hiding place, her breath coming in shallow gasps. The novel had done nothing to ease her anxiety. Instead, it awakened a curiosity within her.

The curiosity made room for even more fear however, when her father insisted that the wedding take place as quickly and quietly as possible—in yet another attempt to convince the ton that the engagement was not a recent one.

To Caroline, it came as a fair bit of a shock when her father announced that she'd marry within a fortnight.

"Father," she protested weakly. "Surely… surely we can wait a week longer? I… we need time to prepare, to…"

William did not allow her to finish her thought, instead fixing her with a stern glare. "There is no time, Caroline," he said coldly. "The longer we wait, the more people will speculate that perhaps this wedding had not been in the making already. We must act swiftly if we want any chance to put this scandal behind us."

There was nothing she could do other than mutter a reserved "Yes, father." She knew that arguing would not be tolerated.

The only thing that made this catastrophe bearable, was knowing that she was helping to preserve Beatrice's reputation. Her sister had not spoken to her at all—but Caroline desperately clung to the hope that in saving Beatrice's reputation, her sister would marry after all. This would restore their fractured relationship, she was certain of it.

Of course she had tried speaking to her sister, tried her best to explain everything to her but Beatrice did not want to listen to a word that came out of her sister's mouth. Instead, she turned away whenever her sister entered the area she was in—speaking only in short syllables and avoiding any talk of the wedding.

As Caroline made her way to her bedchamber after yet another day of wedding planning and arrangements, her mind drifted to her future husband. Would he be a cruel or indifferent husband? Would they learn to love one another?

Desperate for a reprieve from her thoughts, Caroline once again turned to one of the worn little books beneath her mattress. She was not quite certain what it was she was looking for—all she knew was that she needed answers of some kind to ease her nerves about her upcoming wedding. She paged through the book lazily, her eyes widening when she turned a page.

Lady Amelia trembled as Lord Thornton's strong hands roamed over her curves. His touch ignited a fire within her.

"My lord," she gasped, her voice breathy with desire. "It's not proper."

"Hang propriety," the rakish lord growled, his lips hot against Amelia's ear. "I have waited too long to make you mine."

With a suddenness that stole her breath, he captured her mouth in a searing kiss. His tongue plundered the sweet recesses of her mouth and Amelia melted against him. Her body molded easily to the hard planes of his chest as her hands thread through his hair.

Thornton tore his lips from hers and blazed a trail of heated kisses down her throat. "Tell me you want this," he demanded in a gruff voice. "Tell me you burn for me as I burn for you."

"I burn for you," Lady Amelia whispered. "I burn for you, I yearn for you…"

With a groan of triumph, Thornton lowered the young maiden to the bed—his fingers deftly removing the fastenings of her gown. As the fabric fell away, baring her creamy flesh to his hungry gaze, Amelia knew that there was no turning back…

Caroline slammed the book shut, her heart racing and her cheeks flushed. A warmth pooled in the pit of her stomach and settled between her thighs. Would… would Sebastian take her in this way?

She shook her head guiltily and glanced at the door before sliding the book back to its hiding place. It was treacherous to entertain those thoughts, she told herself. She could never give herself to him… Could she?

As it had been since the fateful ball, Caroline's sleep was erratic—intercut with memories and visions of the man who plagued her existence despite the fact that she had not seen him since agreeing to marry him.

This changed the very next day. In a woeful attempt to grant her sister some reprieve, Caroline had taken to remaining in her room when she was not busy with wedding planning—though her part of it consisted mostly of nodding and smiling.

"My lady," Anne's voice drifted towards her where she sat, staring out of her chamber window. Caroline looked at her maid quickly and Anne looked down, still avoiding her lady's eyes. Caroline suppressed a sigh at this. She wondered if even the maids blamed her for Beatrice's misery.

"My lady, Lord Casterbridge is here to see you," Anne got out at last, and Caroline's eyes widened, her heart racing as she slowly rose to her feet.

"To… to see me?"

The question, she realized at once, was utterly ridiculous and she did not waste time waiting for an answer. Instead, she passed Anne slowly on her way to the parlor where her mother stood in the door impassively.

Behind her mother's stony face, she could make out Sebastian's broad shoulders. Geraldine Wentworth looked at her daughter sternly. Sebastian met her eyes over her mother's shoulder and shot her an apologetic smile—one she returned hesitantly.

"Lady Caroline," Sebastian said softly, and Geraldine moved to the side slightly—allowing Caroline to see her future husband. "I am sorry for the intrusion," Sebastian continued. "But I felt it was imperative that we speak before the wedding."

To Caroline, this was quite a relief and she glanced at her mother before looking back at Sebastian. "Thank you, My Lord," she said softly. "I… I suppose that would be good. Please… do have a seat."

Sebastian obliged, settling himself on the cushions and waited for Caroline to do the same. She perched on the edge of the seat, her hands clasped tightly in her lap.

For a moment, neither of them spoke, the silence stretching awkwardly between them. Caroline could feel her mother's eyes boring into her back, and she struggled to find the right words to say.

Geraldine stood suddenly, her face still stony. "I shall give you… some privacy," she said coldly before moving through a door connecting the parlor to the next chamber. Caroline let out a shaky sigh. Sebastian looked at her with something akin to sympathy coloring his features.

"Lady Caroline," he said softly at last. "I know that this situation… is far from ideal. But… I do want you to know that I am committed to making this… as painless as possible."

Caroline's cheeks flushed and she looked up at him shyly. There was something different about him—in fact, she now found that she did not mind his close proximity at all, something that was rather surprising seeing as how she always found Edward far too cloying when he looked at her so intimately.

"Forgive me for asking," Sebastian said hesitantly. "But… I must know if you are satisfied with this arrangement."

Caroline hesitated and her brow furrowed. "I am not sure," she admitted softly, and he lifted his brows. An uncomfortable silence settled between them and it was Sebastian who broke it at last.

"Please help me understand," he spoke softly. "You did agree to the arrangement out of free will, did you not?"

"I agreed," Caroline admitted, avoiding his eyes. She released a breath before looking up at him. "You must understand, My Lord, I never planned this."

Tears formed in her eyes as she looked at him earnestly, and Sebastian's brow furrowed. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees as his eyes searched hers. "Lady Caroline," he said gently. "I want you to know that I would never dream of forcing you into a marriage if you do not want it. If you believe that this union will bring you misery, I will go to your father and call off the engagement—scandal be damned."

Caroline's eyes widened at this. She could see from the look in his eyes that he was serious and it sent a comforting warmth to her chest. She flashed him a shaky smile and for a moment, she considered taking him up on this offer—telling him that she could not go through with the marriage.

Then Beatrice's pale face flashed through her mind, and she shook her head. She could not be selfish. She had to think of her sister—she'd already hurt her enough.

"I appreciate your offer, My Lord. Truly I do. But I cannot accept it." Despite her doubts, her voice was steady. "I must do the right thing now—by my sister. I cannot do anything that will harm her reputation. I will go through with this marriage, and I will do my best to be a good wife."

At this, Sebastian reached out and took her hand in his. The feeling of his bare skin touching hers sent shockwaves through Caroline and her cheeks flushed when she thought of the way Lady Amelia felt when Lord Thornton touched her. She attempted to lift her eyes to meet Sebastian's gaze, but her eyes got stuck on his lips when he spoke.

"I promise you, I will do everything in my power to be a good husband to you," he said now. Caroline nodded absentmindedly. Her eyes were still fixed to his lips—the top made a slight cupid's bow, while the lower lip was slightly fuller. She suddenly had the strange desire to reach out and touch his mouth, wondering whether his lips would be coarse and rough or soft and gentle.

"I will try to make you happy," he was saying now and Caroline's cheeks flushed.

"Thank you, My Lord," she muttered at last, returning her gaze to her hands and pressing her thighs together in a futile attempt to rid herself of the odd feeling taking hold of her body.

"It means a lot to me," she continued softly. His lips—those enchanting, mesmerizing lips—curled into a smile and Caroline looked up quickly. His eyes crinkled at the corners.

"Please call me Sebastian. We are to be husband and wife after all."

Caroline returned his smile, the warmth spreading from her belly to her chest. "Sebastian," she repeated softly, tasting the name on her tongue.

Before she could say more, a footman appeared in the door—wringing his hands nervously. "The earl has requested your presence in his study, Lord Casterbridge," he said, and Sebastian inclined his head towards Caroline slightly before rising to his feet and following the footman—leaving Caroline rather breathless in the parlor.

Chapter 9

Sebastian was quiet as he followed the footman to the earl's study. He silently hoped that once he was married to Caroline, these visits to the man's study would stop. They only served to make him feel as though he had even less of a say over his own life, and it was rather frustrating indeed.

He entered the earl's study with a polite nod, though his smile was stiff. William Wentworth looked up as Sebastian entered, his own smile rather cold.

"Sebastian," he said after a pointed silence. "Please. Sit."

Sebastian settled into the chair across from the earl, who was looking at him with a strange expression. He let out an irritable sigh and William lifted his brows.

"I trust your conversation with my daughter was satisfactory," William said, then continued slowly. "Caroline—the one you are marrying now."

It took all of Sebastian's self control to merely nod and refrain from making a biting comment about William treating his own daughters as though they were interchangeable. "Indeed it was. Lady Caroline and I had a lovely talk. Thank you."

William's mouth turned in a grimace. "I find it heartening that you can manage a lovely talk with my daughter while keeping your hands off her," he said simply, and Sebastian scowled.

"My lord," he explained coldly. "I agree that the situation is unfortunate. But as I have explained before, it was a misunderstanding. Lady Caroline lost her balance and I was merely attempting to be chivalrous."

"Chivalrous," William repeated, a strange light shining in his eyes. "Forgive me, but the ton is abuzz with rumors of your rakish past. I must wonder if this misunderstanding was truly innocent."

A frown settled between Sebastian's brows at this. "If you do not believe me, my lord, believe your daughter. I would also appreciate it if you allowed my past to be just that—my past. I have been nothing but honorable in my interactions with your daughters."

"Have you?" William's tone was quite measured, but Sebastian could feel his cheeks heating up at the question. It was true, of course, that he had only ever been honorable in his interactions with the ladies—but he could not deny that his thoughts have been less than pure when he thought of Caroline.

In fact, perhaps his mind drifted towards the seductive softness of her curves a bit too often, and he shifted uncomfortably at the thought. William still stared at him and Sebastian could feel heat rising to his cheeks, as though the man could read his thoughts.

"I have," he insisted, and William nodded stiffly.

"Be that as it may, we are in this situation now. I would like your assurance that my daughter will be safe with you."

It was the first time that William showed concern for his daughter and Sebastian nodded slowly, strangely heartened by this. "You have my word, My Lord."

With this, the conversation soon dried up—William merely nodding before returning to his paperwork. Sebastian remained seated for a while, then stood uncomfortably when the silence continued.

"If I may…"

William merely nodded and Sebastian left the study with a lighter frown. While he was certain that William Wentworth did not approve of him entirely, he was rather hopeful that the man was merely looking out for his daughter. Perhaps, he thought, he could not blame the man for his hostility.

A smile appeared on Sebastian's face when the daughter he had been thinking of suddenly appeared in front of him, a delightful blush coloring her cheeks.

"I hid in one of the hallways," Caroline admitted with a tentative smile, her cheeks turning a deeper shade of crimson. "I wanted to see you off," she explained.

Sebastian could not help but smile at this and a warmth bloomed in his chest. He could not deny that he found Caroline more intriguing than Beatrice. Where her sister was preoccupied with propriety and appearances, Caroline had a spark of wit and independence that drew him in. There was something about her.

"I should be thanking you, My Lady—for agreeing to marry me," he said now, his voice low and earnest. Caroline ducked her head and a small smile played at the corners of her mouth.

"I will admit, it is a rather intimidating thought, getting married," she admitted and Sebastian took an impulsive step towards her.

"Is it?"

Caroline looked up at him with wide eyes. They were closer together now than they had been since he'd caught her, and this time Sebastian took his time to truly look at her. There was no denying that Caroline Wentworth was beautiful. Her blonde locks were braided, though a few strands had escaped and framed her face. Sebastian moved his hand slightly, allowing it to hover over her hips as he studied her. Her fair visage was adorned with almond shaped eyes the color of the ocean, a delicately sculpted nose and full lips.

His eyes fixed on those lips now, an inviting pink color. The point of her tongue darted out now, moving over her lips nervously.

"I do believe that we will make a fine match," he said, his voice low. Caroline's eyes widened at the words, and she blinked slowly. Sebastian leaned his head slightly forward, his breath ghosting over her skin. "I am quite pleased to be marrying you, Lady Caroline," he whispered.

Her mouth opened slightly at this and she looked up at him through her lashes. For a mad second, Sebastian wondered what it would be like to kiss those waiting lips. Caroline pressed a soft hand against his chest and looked up, her eyes stormy.

Then a door creaked down the hall and the pair stepped away from each other quickly. Sebastian flashed her a crooked grin, surprised by his own breath feeling quite fast.

"Until our wedding day," he said softly before turning on his heel and making his way back to his carriage.

A sweet scent clung to him as he climbed into the carriage. Roses, he realized as he shifted on the seat and nodded at the driver.

Caroline Wentworth was different from anyone he'd ever met, he realized as he gazed out of the carriage window. The slight throbbing between his strong thighs alerted him to the fact that he was not unaffected by her beauty—not at all.

***

As much as Sebastian had to admit that he was not unaffected by her proximity, Caroline had to admit the same. She had no idea what had possessed her to wait for him but she could not regret it.

Her body felt strangely light as she made her way to her bedchamber, her heart racing wildly in her chest. They had been so close together that she had felt like the heroine between one of the pages of the books she'd been devouring since her engagement had been announced.

But nothing in those pages could have prepared Caroline for the way her body reacted to Sebastian Fairchild. In fact, as she sat down on her bed, her heart was racing wildly in her chest and there was a strange slickness between her thighs.

Caroline pressed a hand to her heart and let out a shuddering breath in an attempt to calm the fluttering within her stomach. It did not work and she rose to her feet slowly. Despite the attraction she admittedly felt for her future husband, she could not be entirely happy about her impending marriage—at least not yet. With a sigh she walked out of her own bedchamber slowly, walking towards her sister's closed door.

Beatrice was still furious with her, she knew—and though she yearned to talk to someone about the confusing feelings rising within her, she knew she couldn't talk to her sister about it. Still, she wanted to talk to her sister about something—anything.

With a deep sigh, Caroline raised her hand and knocked on the door, her voice soft and pleading. "Beatrice? Can we talk? Please?"

Though Caroline heard muffled sounds from within, Beatrice did not answer and Caroline pressed her forehead against the wood, her heart aching. "I know you are angry and hurt… and I know you don't believe that it was all a misunderstanding, but please Beatrice… you are my sister and I love you. I do not want to lose you. Please don't be angry…"

She hesitated, tears forming in her eyes. "Or be angry—be furious, yell at me, curse me, but please talk to me. Please, Beatrice."

Still, there was no response from the other side of the door. Caroline let out a shuddering breath and blinked back the tears that threatened to fall. She felt like a traitor for liking Sebastian, for being attracted to him… although she knew that this marriage was for her sister's sake as much as her own.

"Beatrice," she tried again, her voice desperate. "I do not have a choice. I must marry Sebastian in order to save not only my reputation, but your own. I am doing this for both of us!"

She waited—certain that this assertion would at least elicit some reaction. When it did not, she sighed deeply before returning to her own bedchamber.

To her surprise, her mother was in her bedchamber and Caroline hovered at the door uncomfortably. The stubborn tears still stung behind her eyelids and for the first time since the ball, the countess looked at her with something other than contempt.

In fact, Caroline was quite certain that there was a hint of sympathy in her mother's eyes.

"Beatrice will not talk to me," she admitted softly and entered her bedchamber to take a seat next to her mother. Her mother sighed deeply at this, a frown furrowing her brows.

"I'm not surprised."

Caroline looked away quickly, hurt by the hardness in her mother's tone. Perhaps she was wrong about the sympathy after all, she mused. Perhaps she had not only lost her sister, but her mother as well.

The countess sighed, though, and placed a soft hand on her daughter's knee. "Give her time," she encouraged, and Caroline looked at her hopefully. "For now, however, you must focus on your marriage," she insisted, and Caroline sighed.

"I suppose so," she agreed and her mother flashed her a hesitant smile. "I spoke to him earlier and I do believe it is prudent to visit the home where you will live with your husband—the home he will inherit after your marriage. We will leave in the morning."

With this, she left—leaving her daughter shocked and slightly curious.

To Caroline's relief, the night passed rather quickly and she was spared any dreams. In fact, it was quite early when she joined her mother in the carriage—on the way to what would soon be her home.

A soft smile appeared on Caroline's face when the carriage came to a halt in front of the cottage and she noticed Sebastian's tall figure in the garden. She supposed it made sense for them to get to know each other before the wedding.

Sebastian flashed her a charming smile and inclined his head in her mother's direction. "Lady Lincoln, Lady Caroline," he greeted with a smile. "Welcome."

Geraldine nodded at him before walking to the veranda where she sat, her eyes following the betrothed pair coolly. Sebastian glanced at the countess—an obvious chaperone—before facing Caroline.

"Shall I show you the garden?"

Despite the obvious awkwardness of the situation, Caroline felt a smile forming around her lips. "I'd be delighted."

As they walked through the garden, Caroline could not help but admire the easy way that Sebastian strolled or the way his lips curved when he smiled. As she had said to her sister a lifetime ago—he truly was handsome and though the circumstances of their marriage were far from ideal, she could not help but feel comfortable next to him.

"Here is my pride and joy in the garden," he said as they arrived at a flowerbed. "Hollyhocks—by far the most beautiful flower here."

"The most beautiful?" Caroline shook her head with a smile. "Certainly you are mistaken," she challenged. "Or did you not see the roses?"

"I tend to the roses daily, Lady Caroline," Sebastian teased, "and I maintain that the hollyhocks are far more beautiful."

Caroline merely laughed and shook her head. "Please—next you will tell me that you prefer the works of Lord Byron over William Wordsworth."

At this, Sebastian let out a mock gasp. "Oh, do not dare tell me that you are a Wordsworth-maiden!"

"Of course I am," she retorted quickly. "In fact, his prose is far more beautiful than any I have read."

Sebastian laughed and shook his head. "I fear we will not agree on much," he teased and Caroline shrugged, her eyes twinkling with delight.

"I know! Is it not delightful?" she said with a soft laugh. The joy faded slightly when she thought of her sister and as though he had read the reason for her sudden shift in mood, Sebastian looked at her earnestly.

"How is your sister faring? I do feel quite terrible about the situation."

There was true concern in his voice and Caroline sighed. "She won't speak to me. She used to be my best friend, but now… she ignores me, it is as though I have become naught more than a specter in her life," she admitted.

The sympathy was evident in Sebastian's eyes and Caroline quickly averted her eyes, fearful of the tears building beneath her lids.

"Give her time. I am certain that all will be well eventually," he said gently, and she let out a soft sigh.

"Thank you," she whispered simply, using a finger to wipe the budding tears away. The lightness of their earlier conversations was gone now.

"She should have been the one to marry first," Caroline said softly. "She cares about the ton, what people think… I cannot help but feel as though I took it from her."

Sebastian came to a sudden halt at that, and he tilted his head as he looked down at her. Caroline looked up at him curiously and a soft smile appeared around his lips.

"Dear child of nature, let them rail," he whispered, and her eyes widened slightly before a smile settled around her lips too.

"Wordsworth," she teased with a soft laugh. "I am quite impressed that you chose him over Byron."

Sebastian shrugged and fine lines appeared next to his eyes as he laughed. "I will always aim to make my future wife happy," he said softly. Caroline returned his smile before following back to the veranda, frowning slightly when he halted suddenly and bent down. When he turned to her, he held a deep red rose in his hands.

"For you," he said simply, his eyes meeting hers and the air suddenly changing around them. Caroline could feel her heart fluttering as she gazed from the flower up at him, and her hand trembled when she took the rose.

A shockwave coursed through her body when his hand brushed against hers, his skin warm and soft. His lips curved up in a smile and she released a shuddering breath, her eyes fluttering closed for a second before she turned away and sped back to her mother, her heart beating wildly in her chest.