Chapter Eight

I waited anxiously in my room. I didn’t want to barge into Dad’s office too soon. But the longer the wait took, the harder it got to stay put.

A knock sounded and I practically flew toward the door and ripped it open.

Mom stood in the hallway. “Can I come in?”

Her face was unreadable, which made my heart sink. I would probably cry if Paris didn’t work out. It seemed my only chance to live my dreams until marriage would crush them.

I stepped back. “Of course.”

Mom walked in and sank down on my sofa. I sat beside her. “And?” I asked, unable to hold back any longer.

“Your dad had a long conversation with Santino.”

I nodded, ready to burst.

“Santino convinced your dad that he can protect you in Paris, so your father and I will allow you to start your fashion design studies—”

I screeched and threw my arms around Mom’s neck. Mom laughed and patted my arm.

“Let me finish,” she pressed out, obviously struggling to breathe because of my tight hug.

I pulled back, my cheeks flushed.

“We’ll allow you to start but how long you’ll be allowed to stay that depends on the overall safety situation and your behavior. If we feel at any time, that your safety is on the line, you’ll return.”

“Of course, Mom. I’ll be on my best behavior.”

Mom searched my eyes. “Your father trusts in Santino’s abilities. He’s a very competent soldier.” She paused. “I, however, don’t know if I like the idea of you alone with him in Paris.”

I swallowed and made a shocked face. “Why? He’s been protecting me for years.”

“Yes, yes,” Mom said slowly. “I’m your mother, but I’m also a woman, and I have eyes.”

I tried to look as unsuspecting as humanly possible.

Mom’s expression made it clear I could drop the act. “That look works on men, not on mothers.”

“Why?”

“Because fathers want to believe their daughters are the epitome of innocence and they’d rather preserve it than see it crumple.”

“I don’t want to do anything bad, Mom. I just want to live a little, is that so bad?”

“If you ask most men in our world, yes. If you ask me, it depends.”

I knew I was treading thin ice confiding in Mom about the freedoms I wanted to experience, but Mom was the most understanding person I knew. And despite our world, she was a feminist and wanted equal chances for women and men.

“I want to have some fun before I’ll have to marry Clifford.”

“I know Clifford is having his fair share of fun and I suspect he won’t hold himself back at the frat parties he’ll attend in the next few years.”

“Definitely not,” I said then told Mom about the strange conversation he and I had a while back.

She touched my arm. “Like Clifford has said, discretion is the key. As long as you use protection, I don’t mind you having fun. With your marriage to Clifford, you have more freedoms than most women in our world…” She trailed off. “Freedom of choice doesn’t mean we should choose every option available to us. Some remain unwise.”

I knew she was talking about Santino. I chose to stay silent. Every word I said might reveal more than I wanted. Mom was on a trail and I didn’t want to ruin my chances of going to Paris because she thought I had the hots for Santino.

“I want you to stay away from Santino. That’s my condition. If I get the feeling that there’s something going on between you and him, then you’ll be on the next flight back to Chicago and he’ll have a new job.”

“Mom, you really don’t have to worry. Santino doesn’t have the slightest interest in me. He can barely tolerate me and he takes his job way too seriously.”

Mom’s eyes seemed to x-ray me. “You have an iron will and you like getting your way, sweetheart. Both can be an advantage but it can also get you in trouble. I want to be sure that you, too, keep the expected distance to Santino. It would reflect badly on your dad if the man he chose to protect you disrespects him by inappropriate conduct toward you.”

Ouch. Mom knew how to land a hit. “Is this really about Santino or do you and Dad prefer if I stay a virgin until marriage?”

“This is solely about Santino. He has a responsibility for you and he’s much older and experienced than you. You should pick a boy your age if you want to enjoy your temporary freedoms.”

Santino being more experienced was one of the reasons why I found him sexy. I had a feeling Santino knew how to give a woman a good time. Mrs. Alfera probably wouldn’t risk her husband’s wrath for a lackluster lover.

Of course, I didn’t mention either of this. “Dad’s twelve years older than you.”

“Our situation was very different. I was already married before and I was a grown woman. You’re Santino’s ward, and he’s known you a long time, that puts you at a disadvantage.”

That showed how biased Mom was as my mother. “You were only twenty-three when you had to marry Dad. In a marriage you are at a greater disadvantage because the husband holds all the power, especially if he’s Capo. Dad knew you from social events since you were much younger. And you told me yourself your first marriage was never real, so really we weren’t on so different levels. Only I’m not married to Santino, so he doesn’t have any power over me.”

“Arguing with you used to be easier.”

I grinned.

Mom sobered. “I have one non-negotiable condition, Anna. I don’t want you and Santino to happen. That’s all. You can have fun, but not with him.”

“Don’t worry, Mom. He’s not interested in me, and I’m more interested in meeting a cute Parisian artsy guy. I don’t have any interest in Santino. Maybe I had a tiny crush on him when I was twelve or thirteen, but I’m not that little girl anymore.”

I could tell that Mom wasn’t completely convinced, but she nodded anyway.

My pulse was pounding in my veins as I stepped into Dante’s office. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d been this pissed. Anna had backed me into a corner and I had only one option to get out of it, telling Dante the truth about my fling with Mrs. Alfera and kissing Anna.

The former was something that might only lead to disapproval and a warning from my Capo. The latter however could cost me everything, and not just me. Dad had worked hard all his life and was well respected. Even if he had nothing to do with my shit, he would probably be dragged into the mud with me.

“Santino,” Dante said with a curt nod. He stood in front of the window, his arms behind his back and a look of worry on his face. Despite his age, he oozed strength, and his authority certainly hadn’t been diminished over the years. He was one of the few people I truly respected. Lying to him didn’t sit well with me for various reasons.

“I’ve asked you to come to my office because I need your honest opinion on a matter.”

“All right. Dad always tells me I can be brutally honest, so that shouldn’t be the problem,” I said, my voice reasonably calm considering the rage still bubbling under the surface.

Dante turned to face me fully, which made me work even harder to keep my face controlled. “Anna’s been accepted to attend a school for fashion design in Paris starting this Fall and I have to decide if I’ll allow her to go.”

“Paris,” I said, surprised, as if that was news to me. “I assume you’re not talking about Paris, Texas.”

Dante let out a dry laugh. “Unfortunately, Anna’s dream is a year in France. Possibly longer.”

Did she really expect me to live in France for years? I sure as fuck wouldn’t learn French just so she could eat baguette with a view of the Eiffel Tower. I couldn’t believe I’d allowed Anna to blackmail me. Why had I kissed her? What the fuck had gone wrong in my brain? “That’s a long time away from home.”

“Indeed. You’ve been responsible for Anna’s safety for years and I trust your judgment. I need to be sure that Anna will be safe living in Paris. That would require your presence at the very least.”

I took a deep breath. “Paris is probably safer than Chicago for Anna, considering that the Camorra and the Famiglia are far away. If we make sure Anna’s presence in Paris isn’t widely known and we arrange for her to live as a normal student there, I doubt she’ll face more dangers than here.”

“For the time of Anna’s studies in Paris, you’d have to uproot your entire life. You could only visit home when Anna comes back to Chicago for social events, which will happen frequently, but you’d still have to give up your life for her.”

What life? I wanted to ask. Since I’d become Anna’s bodyguard, I’d worked almost every day. And it wasn’t just a fucking nine-to-five job. More like seven to ten in the evening. I had to always be available when she wanted to go anywhere. I was at her beck and call. So the only thing that would make Paris an even harder experience was that I wouldn’t even be off at night and that I’d have to sleep with an eye open to make sure Anna didn’t sneak into my bed. “I don’t have a wife or girlfriend, and my sister isn’t living at home anymore. And I’m sure I’ll see my father whenever you and Valentina visit or when Anna and I come to the States.”

“You’d have to live a lie. It would probably be feasible to pretend you’re her brother in public to explain the two of you being together all the time.”

Brother? Of course, Dante wouldn’t want us to pretend to be a couple, which was probably for the best anyway. Crossing boundaries had let me here in the first place, so getting me in the mindset of seeing Anna as firmly off limits again was key.

“You can’t have any days off, not even a night,” Dante continued, unaware of my racing thoughts.

I nodded. “That’s true. It’ll be challenging.” I cleared my throat. “I’ll do it and I’m confident I can keep her safe, but after I’ve watched Anna in Paris, I’d like to resign as a bodyguard and return to working with Arturo. I miss that line of work.”

Dante’s brows drew together. I wasn’t sure if it was a good or bad sign. Despite knowing the man for decades, I had trouble reading him. He finally inclined his head. “I give you my word that you’ll become Enforcer once you’re back.”

Fuck yes!

I couldn’t wait to tell Anna one day, but definitely not any time soon. “Better not tell Anna yet. I don’t want her to think I won’t work properly because I have my head elsewhere.” The little she-devil would only find a way to convince Dante to keep me as her bodyguard or blackmail me into staying. After Paris, I was fucking done. Things between Anna and me were spiraling out of control, and Paris was already a ridiculously high risk.

“I told Anna she could leave in February. We have to wait for her engagement and a few important social events to pass before she can leave.”

“Will the Clarks agree to her going to France?”

“They follow very different rules than we do, which brings me to my next point.”

I waited. I had a feeling I knew where this was going, and it probably had partly to do with me.

“Because of her bond to Clifford, Anna has more freedoms than most girls in our world. I’m sure Clifford has told her so. He doesn’t strike me as someone who cares what she does before marriage and possibly not even after.”

The disapproval in Dante’s voice surprised me. He and Valentina had decided to enter the bond with the Clarks but I supposed it was a bit like the deal with the devil. Necessary at times, but not pleasant. Dante didn’t like Maximo Clark, not even his own wife did.

“Fidelity isn’t guaranteed in their, nor in our world,” I said. I’d had too many affairs with married women who sought comfort in the arms of another man after being cheated on for years and suffering in silence. Maybe that was why I no longer believed in marriage or love. My parents had loved each other, and it had almost killed Dad when Mom had died. Love fucked you over either way.

“In our world, any man would know better than to betray Anna.”

“That’s true.” Most would shit their pants out of fear of Dante. “But Anna is tough. I’m sure she’ll wrap Clifford around her finger in no time.” The words really cost me. Anna was a major pain in the ass and drove me up the wall almost every day, but she was also a mafia princess, proud and clever, not to mention gorgeous. She deserved better than Clifford. She deserved a man who knew her worth, who really understood who she was and the weight she carried on her shoulders. Clifford was too wrapped up in his daddy and mommy issues, not to mention planning his future career to realize what kind of gem he was given without any work of his own.

“Why I’m bringing this up is because while I want Anna to enjoy Paris, even attend the occasional party with you at her side, I still need you to make sure she abides to our rules and is safe.”

“I assume you are talking about boys.”

“If Clifford and the Clarks decide to break the engagement for whatever reason, they’re not bound by our oaths and honor so I won’t rule it out completely, I need to make sure Anna won’t face an unfortunate scandal if she enters a marriage with one of our men. Our world remains old-fashioned in this regard and my and Valentina’s efforts to lead to a change haven’t been successful, at least in that point.”

“I’ll make sure Anna stays away from boys, don’t worry.” I’d thoroughly enjoy cockblocking any guy who wanted to put his paws on her. I tried not to dwell on why this gave me such a fucking thrill.

“I appreciate it,” Dante drawled and slowly strode closer to me. Now it was coming, the warning I’d been waiting for. “As a father, I try to ignore certain developments, but I’m not blind to the fact that Anna has become a beautiful young woman who’ll soon be of age, and you aren’t committed to anyone. Living in such close quarters might make Anna or you forget certain boundaries.”

I chuckled as if this was completely unrealistic. “Trust me, neither Anna nor I are at risk to lose sight of any boundaries. Anna is very driven and dutiful. She’ll focus on her studies, and if she fawns over a boy, it’ll be some Frenchman who’s into drawing and the opera. But even if Anna suddenly had any interest in me, I’m not in the slightest interested in her. I’ve always been more drawn to older women.” That was the absolute truth. All of my affairs and even short-term girlfriends had been older. Arturo, in a rare moment of being funny, had called me the MILFinator once. I wasn’t sure what it was about Anna that was different, that made me show even the slightest interest in her. But it sure as fuck wouldn’t be enough to make me land in bed with her. I’d go looking for a nice French MILF to keep me company. “My Dad was more worried about me making the moves on your wife than Anna when I started working here,” I said in a true foot-in-mouth moment. One day I’d end up with a bullet in my head, because of my dick or my mouth.

Dante’s eyes flashed, and he raised one eyebrow. “That’s certainly reassuring,” he said in a low voice.

I decided to keep my mouth shut before it spewed some even stupider shit. Dante was a controlled man and even more controlled Capo, which saved my life right now.

“I don’t think I’ll have to tell you what will happen if I find out you acted in any way inappropriate to Anna, or my wife, in Paris or at any other place.”

“I’ve been your Enforcer, Capo. No need to give me any details. And knowing Arturo’s freaky brain, he’ll probably see it as an even greater challenge to torture me.”

“Rest assured, I’d handle you myself in this case.”

I chuckled and nodded. “While it would be an honor to die at your hands, I assure you it won’t come to that.”