Chapter Thirty-One

Silence reigned in church. Everyone stared at me and Mom.

I couldn’t believe Mom would have stopped the wedding if I hadn’t said no. Or maybe she’d seen on my face that I was about to say no and wanted to show her support.

A boulder seemed to fall off my shoulders and I couldn’t help but smile, for the first time today, in earnest.

Then my eyes met Clifford’s and guilt crushed down on me. He still held the wedding ring but slowly lowered his hand and then dropped it to his side, balling his hand to a fist.

“I’m sorry, Clifford. So sorry. I should have said something sooner, but I really thought I could go through with marrying you.”

He smiled bitterly. “You make it sound as if I’m a punishment.”

“No! That’s not how I meant it but I’m in love with someone else.”

“Of course. Santino.”

I swallowed. The shocked whispers were picking up around us.

“You don’t have feelings for me, and I’m sure it won’t reflect badly on you that our wedding got canceled. I thought being left at the altar would look better in your CV than a divorce, especially with conservative voters,” I said with a teasing smile, but Clifford didn’t smile. He looked dead serious and so did his parents.

“Couldn’t you have decided this before our wedding day?” he asked. “I thought Santino was only a fling.”

He was meant to be only a fling. But he was everything. I should have realized it sooner and been brave enough to act on my feelings. After all, I’d visited him every day despite Enzo’s disapproving gaze and had spent almost every moment worrying about him and not my wedding.

“Excuse me,” Clifford said in a clipped voice. “My father requires my presence. I assume he needs to brief me on how we can destroy your family in the most public way.”

I didn’t get the chance to say more because we walked off. My heart sank. The Clarks would undoubtedly cause major trouble, unless we stopped them. Judging by Dad’s calculating expression, he was already trying to come up with a plan.

I wished I could help him but my mind was a mess. Mom appeared at my side and ushered me through the side entrance, and then back into the room where I’d waited before.

“I can’t believe you stopped the wedding,” I whispered with a stunned giggle.

Mom shook her head as if she couldn’t believe it either. “Your father isn’t happy with us, and I can’t even blame him. He’ll have many sleepless nights trying to figure out a way out of the mess.”

I nodded. Despite my guilt, a relieved smile once again tugged at my lips. I wanted to dance in joy. I’d never felt more relieved in my life, as if suddenly the future held promise again.

“The look on your face is the one of a happy bride,” Mom said with a small smile, touching my cheek.

I bit my lip. I could hardly contain my happiness, even if today marked the day my reputation would be shredded. Maybe things wouldn’t be as bad because many Made Men had been against a bond with a politician. Still, they probably wouldn’t be happy with how things had gone down.

“I know this is because of Santino, and I want you to know that I don’t approve of your bond. I stopped this wedding because I knew you’d be unhappy in it.”

“Is it really so bad that Santino and I have feelings for each other? He took several bullets for me, Mom. He would do everything for me. You shouldn’t be angry at him. I’m the one who put him through hell.”

Mom pursed her lips. “We’ll see.”

Santino was well respected, especially among the soldiers. I knew he’d eventually win Mom over as well. Dad, however… I was anxious about facing him. “Does Dad suspect anything?”

“About you and Santino? Even if he didn’t want to suspect anything before, he’ll certainly come to his own conclusions now, and a failed wedding always makes people assume there’s someone else.”

“I’ll do whatever it takes to protect the Outfit from the waves I’ve caused, okay?”

Mom kissed my temple. “We’ll all handle it together as a family. Now wait here while I try to talk to your father.”

I nodded quickly, and Mom left.

I stared at myself in the mirror. I glowed. Glowed like a bride should on her wedding day. Glowed because my wedding had been canceled.

The door swung open and I expected Dad or Leonas, but Sofia and Luisa slipped in, their faces slack with shock.

I gave my best friends a sheepish smile.

“What the hell just happened there?” Sofia shouted.

Luisa seemed incapable to find words.

I shrugged but a relieved grin split my face. I couldn’t put into words how glad I was that I wasn’t going to marry Clifford, which was totally unfair toward him.

“Mom had something against me marrying Clifford, and I couldn’t go through with it either.”

Sofia widened her eyes comically. “Anna! The press is all over this. Tomorrow everyone will be talking about this.”

“It’s bad, isn’t it?” I asked, but I couldn’t feel regret. Guilt for bringing this down on Mom and Dad? Yes. But not regret.

I should have put a stop to my bond with Clifford a long time ago. I’d clung to our arranged marriage out of some misguided sense of duty, wanting to be the good, virtuous daughter everyone thought I was.

Luisa touched my arm. “You really love Santino, don’t you?”

I bit my lip. I’d never said it to him and hardly dared to admit it to myself. “Yes.”

“I mean, if he’d been present, it could have been straight out of a romantic comedy. With him in the hospital in a coma, it has potential as a drama though.”

I shook my head at my movie-loving, romantic friend. “I bet the Clarks aren’t laughing, Luisa,” I said with a small laugh.

Sofia snorted. “They didn’t look very amused, that’s true.”

Luisa nodded with a worried look. “Maximo Clark will make sure the Outfit and your family pay for this public humiliation. He isn’t someone who presents the other cheek.”

I nodded, worried. “Maybe I can straighten things with Clifford. I need to talk to him in private.”

Sofia gave me a doubtful look. “Maybe you should let your father handle it. This might be an instance where only threats work.”

A knock sounded and a second later Leonas poked his head in. He gave me a sly smile that made me want to hug and punch him.

“We should probably leave. This is family business,” Luisa said to Sofia. After hugging me, they slipped out, leaving me alone with my brother who still smiled broadly.

He sauntered over to me and patted my shoulder. “Thanks, Sis.”

“What for?”

“For making all my past wrongdoings look like a piece of cake.”

I grimaced. “That bad?”

“Pretty bad, yeah. I mean, it could have been worse if you’d killed Clifford to evade marrying him, or if you’d been caught banging Santino in a cupboard during the wedding party, but otherwise you really picked the worst possible moment to decide you couldn’t stand Clifford.”

“You really know how to lift my mood,” I muttered.

“I’m trying,” he said with a smirk, but I could see tension in his eyes. Leonas always pretended he cared about nothing, but our family and the Outfit meant a lot to him, and I might have hurt both today.

I swallowed, guilt weighing heavy on me. “It’s not even that I can’t stand Clifford. He isn’t bad. He’s nice, with a great career ahead of him.”

Leonas made a face as if he doubted it. “Only if voters give him pity votes after today, but being left at the altar doesn’t really scream tough future leader of the state.”

Had I really ruined Clifford’s career today? I didn’t want to believe it. “He’s really ambitious and clever. He’ll turn today into a great story and advantage for him.”

“Whatever. I don’t give a fuck about him, but we should really rack our brains how to make sure the Outfit leaves this shitshow as the winner.”

“I’m surprised you think we can still win after the mess I made.”

Leonas shrugged. “We might have to fight dirty, but that’s all the more fun.”