Chapter 9

Bryce was checking out the engine later that morning, making sure it was fully equipped for the first call of the day, when Toby's voice startled him. "Thanks for the timer. We would've overslept otherwise."

"Yeah, no problem," Bryce said, keeping his tone neutral. What the hell was Toby doing bringing that up at work anyway? Did he want people to know he'd spent the night at their place? Of course, he could have been there as a friend, a friend who got drunk and had to sleep over. They were friends, right? No one would even suspect he'd fucked them. So why did he feel like everyone knew? Guilt?

Or because you can barely keep your hands off them, even now.

Images of the night before assaulted him, and he had to take a deep breath and think of sickening things—roadkill, roaches, brussels sprouts—to keep his cock from getting hard. Toby and Matt had been fucking perfect, so responsive, so happy to let him be in command.

Toby walked away and helped Matt straighten the cabinet where they kept hoses and other supplies. Matt laughed at something Toby said, and Toby pushed him, which set off a round of horseplay Bryce should have reprimanded them for. How could they be so fucking cheerful? They'd had as much to drink as he had the night before, and he was still suffering from his hangover. Fucking twenty-two-year-olds.

Why did he feel so damn awkward around them when—at least as far as he could tell—they were unaffected by what the three of them had done? Was it that easy for them to see the previous night as a get-him-out-of-our-systems fuck? He hoped so.

The hell you do.

That was all it was.

Then why can't you stop looking at them this morning? Why are you wishing you could drag them into the supply closet and put them both on their knees?

Bryce survived his workout and a training session without having to talk to Matt and Toby again. He hoped they hadn't noticed he was avoiding them, but Matt had given him an odd look when they'd headed to the showers. Had that been hurt in his eyes?

Later in the afternoon, Bryce played cards with WT and two guys from another unit while Matt and Toby sat together watching TV. Occasionally, one of them glanced his way, but he couldn't read their expressions—curious? Hurt? Angry? They had to have picked up on the fact that he was ignoring them. Why couldn't he stop acting like an ass? He'd known things would turn weird if they slept together. He was too much of a pussy to enjoy a night with a man he really liked, then just forget him. And he didn't just like Toby and Matt, he wanted to make them his. Sleeping with strangers was so much easier.

In the early afternoon, a call came in for a traffic accident, and Bryce's unit was sent to assist. They arrived on the scene just after the police. Bryce sent WT and Matt to assess the condition of the vehicle's occupants while he and Toby collected the necessary gear. With a crisis to focus on, there wasn't any awkwardness working side by side with Toby. EMTs arrived on the scene a few moments later, and everyone focused on getting the victims, a middle-aged man and his teenaged daughter, free from the wreckage. Both were injured but not critically.

When both victims were loaded into the ambulance, and all that was left was cleanup, Bryce finally took a deep breath. Everything had turned out better than he'd expected when they'd first pulled up at the scene and he'd seen the crumpled car.

"Good work!" Matt clapped him on the back.

He flinched before he realized it was completely normal for Matt to touch him or any of the other firefighters that way. "Sorry. Just jumpy."

Matt gave him an odd look and walked off toward the truck.

Fuck, he needed this day to end. Maybe after a few days without seeing Matt and Toby, he'd be able to get his act together.

Bryce survived the rest of his shift without having to spend time talking to Toby or Matt. After the traffic accident, they were called to the home of an elderly man who'd fallen and then to the scene of a five-car pileup. When he finally got a break, Bryce grabbed some dinner and then tried to sleep on one of the bunks at the station. All he managed was a light doze as his head spun with questions he couldn't—or wouldn't—answer.

The next morning when his shift ended, Bryce tried to get some more sleep, but he didn't have any better luck. He finally gave up on the notion of rest, went for a run, then dragged himself to Nathan's. At least as exhausted and cranky as he was, no one was going to suspect he'd had some of the best sex of his life less than two days earlier.

He pushed open the employees' entrance and stepped inside, managing to make it all the way to the bar without having to do more than nod to a few of the guys in the kitchen as he passed by. Of course he wasn't going to be able to keep that up. Bartenders were generally expected to talk to customers.

When he reached the bar, he saw Mason serving beers to a couple of guys who didn't look more than eighteen, though he was sure Mason had carded them. Damn kids get younger every year.

Kyle had been scheduled to work with him, so he wasn't prepared to face Mason's teasing—or worse, questions—about the other night.

"Kyle call in sick?" he asked.

"His mother's in the hospital."

"That's too bad." From what Bryce knew of Kyle, he no longer talked to his mother, but illnesses had a way of breaking down family barriers.

For the first hour of his shift, the bar stayed busy, and he and Mason didn't have a chance to talk. Jack and Gray came in and settled at the bar like they usually did on nights when they weren't working and Mason was. Eventually, there was a lull as the dinner crowd thinned and the later-night crowd hadn't filtered in yet.

"How'd it go the other night?" Mason asked, a shit-eating grin on his face.

Bryce pretended to ponder the question, tapping his forehead with his index finger. "How did what go?"

Mason punched his upper arm. "You left here with Matt and Toby. You know you did."

"We left at the same time. I do remember that."

"You left with them, not just at the same time," Mason insisted.

"I never kiss and tell."

"So you did…"

"Did I what? Kiss?" Bryce asked, determined not to give an inch.

"You're infuriating," Mason said, scowling.

"And you're a snitch. What were you thinking telling them my schedule?"

Mason shook his head. "I didn't tell them anything, though I probably should've become their informant ages ago."

Bryce narrowed his eyes at Mason. "You really didn't tell them?"

"Cross my heart."

"Then who…" His words trailed off as he looked down the bar at Jack and Gray. Mason followed his gaze. "Would they?" Bryce asked.

"Not Gray. Can you imagine that?"

Bryce couldn't. "Jack?"

"Yeah, but only because he wanted to?—"

The rest of Mason's words were drowned out by the noise of customers as Bryce stalked toward the far end of the bar.

"How's it going?" Jack asked, all smiles.

"Good. Bad. Awkward. I'm not sure." That was the goddamn truth if anything was.

Jack just grinned and nodded.

"Mason says he didn't share my schedule with Toby and Matt. You got any ideas who did?"

"Jack." Gray's tone was full of malice.

Jack raised his hand. "Guilty. I'd like to say I was sorry, but…"

Bryce wanted to be annoyed, but Jack was so damn sincere, not to mention cute. And he'd had an amazing night with Matt and Toby, a fucking unbelievably good night. If only he didn't want another and another and…

Jack waggled his brows. "Mason said you left with them a few nights ago."

"Now my sex life is evening entertainment for the three of you?"

Gray snorted. "I entertained them far better than that."

Bryce chuckled at Gray's defensive tone. "If they ask again, and I doubt they will, don't encourage them."

"All right. I'll restrain my matchmaking abilities next time." Jack pouted a little.

"Damn right you will," Gray said. Bryce was surprised when Gray backed him up instead of defending Jack.

Gray must've sensed Bryce's surprise. "If someone had pushed me toward Jack before I decided for myself I was ready to make a move?—"

Jack snorted. "You made a move? I'd still be waiting if it had been up to you." He looked at Bryce. "I got fed up with waiting, and I told him?—"

"Enough," Gray interrupted. "That's not the point."

Bryce sighed. "It's okay. I know you were trying to help but…"

"Things didn't go well?" Jack asked.

Bryce considered what he should say. "They went too well, and that's the problem."

He turned away from Mason's boyfriends. There were more customers at the bar than Mason could handle on his own now, and Bryce was glad of an escape.

Gray continued to bitch at Jack as Bryce walked off. The little shit deserved it, but Bryce wasn't really mad at him. Only one person deserved his anger and that was himself. He could have walked away and found a random fuck like he'd planned.

Telling them was the right thing. You needed someone to talk to before you drowned in those memories.

Maybe, but I didn't have to get stinking drunk and fuck them afterward.

It was inevitable.

Why did that seem so true? Why were they so different from other men he'd been attracted to?

Because they're perfect for you?

And now, after sleeping with them, he knew just how right that was. He'd always loved taking a dominant role in bed, but he'd only occasionally explored the limits of his need to take charge. Everything about the other night told him Toby and Matt would be willing to explore with him, to submit to more than a few commands and a rough fuck.

Bryce had tried the BDSM scene when he was their age, thinking that would be the best way to get some of his desires met. But most of the men he met wanted more from him than he wanted to give. He wasn't interested in a slave or a twenty-four-seven sub. He wanted men who enjoyed being dominated in bed, then walked away the next morning, not a relationship. But some of his kinks required more trust and the time it took to build that trust, so he'd relegated those to the realm of fantasy.

Could he explore those with Toby and Matt? He imagined what it would be like watching them respond as he delivered pain and pleasure, but even if he'd guessed right and that's what they wanted, he couldn't seriously contemplate anything more than a fling with them. He sucked at hiding who he was and what he wanted, and he certainly couldn't expect them to come out and change shifts or stations for him.

He pushed those depressing thoughts away and concentrated on making drinks and flirting with customers. He was feeling proud of how well he distracted himself. Then Matt and Toby walked into the bar.