23

In a surprising turn of events, my busting the DeKalb police made the Sioux Falls police rethink fucking with me or my pack. Apparently, they finally realized just how vicious I could be to dirty cops.

And I was. I hated giving interviews, but I gave a few about that situation and have a few lined up.

It was the one time I would willingly deal with the press and bullshit of interviews. I hated dirty law enforcement. Anyone who tarnished a badge when I respected mine… They should fry, and if I could help that, fuck—where could I buy more lighter fluid?

The city council and some of its members aren't going away. They're pissed I outed the one guy's affair and know I'm not going to back down. They're full of themselves and think they're awesome while I'm some lowly slut wolf and… Blah, blah, blah.

It's all ridiculous even if it wasn't stupid.

I'm a billionaire.

I'm a division chief of the FBI.

I'm a successful businesswoman.

I'm Alpha of not one but two of the biggest packs in the country.

Seriously, did I need to list anything else to show how stupid they were to think they were more important or had more pull than me? I mean… Seriously ?

Oh, and I held grudges.

But for now, they're being hostile from a distance and just bitching. Yeah, yeah, go bitch all you want. I've still got more I'm going to pull once school is back in session and I can—proverbially—smack some more kids and parents around who were bullying my wolves.

Good times.

Someone at the bank leaked the list of houses I bought and every bullshit contractor looking to screw over supes or church trying to call them names is showing up to harass them. It sucks, but with my permission, the council has sent two teams to help and be visible. They're wearing cameras and reporting it all to the new remote FBI office there.

Though I had to remind the police who keep showing up to care more about the crimes being committed instead of the council guards they keep trying to run background checks on. They weren't even allowed to get involved in that shit, and my office handled it.

So we made three steps forward and one back, but there was progress. I was hearing from Felix that a lot of the neighbors were nice and couldn't care less that wolves had moved in. The ones who did… They could be ignored as long as they bitched from afar.

Awesome.

The wolves from Milwaukee who were involved in the DUI—and the others who were doing penance for the summer—learned fast not to piss me off and my packs were not a joke. They were privileged that they had the lives they did when other supes were shot on sight or suffered other horrors.

And not just supes. There were people who were beaten for breathing in other parts of the world. People so poor they skipped most meals in this country.

My wolves were blessed , and I bled to make that a reality. I wasn't going to let any of them be fucking stupid and risk all of that so they could be stupid .

They would never forget it. Every time I saw them return to the packhouse apartment, they looked ready to drop… And Ashley looked amused.

Good.

The only bad thing is we're running out of chores for them. It gave me an idea, so I called up the Chief of Police and asked if my idiots could wash and detail some squad cars. I could get some extras, and maybe it would show these asshole police in other areas how nice it is when the police are decent to their local shifters and get along.

He agreed… Probably because I'm not someone he wants annoyed with him now that I'm in charge of both Chicago FBI offices more than he wanted to make the statement, but it works for me. So we've got that set up for soon.

Noah is getting over a hundred new vamps. The council is handling that Master vampire and it's a bit of a mess.

A mess they want to clean up on their own, and now Noah's getting a bunch of vamps. Awesome.

No, not really, and it's a group package deal, so it's bullshit.

The council isn't happy that I said it was a 90-day trial since it wasn't the normal application process. Too fucking bad. Then they could drop them all off on someone else. This wasn't our mess, and I was tired of cleaning it all up for everyone. I was the biggest Alpha next to Alena with all my packs, not their fucking fixer or garbagewoman.

Assholes.

Seriously.

I did also bring up what I discussed with the judge and found out a lot of humans thought Master of the City was a unisex term like actor or waiter. I floated by the council that maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea or at least to allow each person to choose for themselves. Mistress was too bastardized in the US from what they were used to… And the actual term of the "other woman."

So it was tricky, but something to think about. Even if they were sexist and some hated me, they had to hate how often I was demeaned for one of their roles and wouldn't like it when I was the boss of some of their most talented vampires. That last part seemed to perk them up.

Good.

Zeno loved his Father's Day gift. Absolutely adored it and the "date" we had picking it out. I promised we would do it again, and he's checking out other exhibitions coming up in Chicago that we could experience together. It's really so cute, and I adore having something to share with a parent like that.

Alena seems to be a bit jealous I have a thing with him and we don't. That amuses Eva and even Mauro.

Mauro is amazing . I seriously love him and not in a sexual way at all. He is like… Honestly, a brother from another mother in the not weird way given Eva is his mother. But he's like a male older me. He's abrasive, distrusting, sarcastic, no-nonsense, and just amazing.

A. M. A. Z. I. N. G.

He's still doing his audit of everything, but the first thing he put an end to is everyone wearing so many damn hats. He is now my business manager and agreed to do it for at least the next few years. That shocked Eva to the point she couldn't speak for a full minute.

Which Mauro enjoyed. A lot.

I did too.

But he explained that this was a challenge unlike any he'd seen and starting businesses to sell them had become boring for him. This was exciting, thrilling even.

I laughed and told him to please, please take it all.

Yeah, he had the same reaction to how much I loved my job, so we were two peas in a pod but with different passions. Fair enough.

The twins and Betas were thrilled because the business side was what was overwhelming them all. They didn't have the background for it, and it was—they had no idea how to manage the blood bottling or any of it. We were winging too much.

So I was ready for any changes Mauro was going to come up with to help. Whatever he wanted.

The lady I saved from the carjacking talked about me being an angel over and over again to anyone who would listen. It was honestly a bit weird to me. No one ever acted like that, and I'd saved a lot of people. Eva said she probably saw a struggling mom just as I'd seen her as someone in need. We recognized our own, and she could help me in this way.

I appreciated it. The nice press about me for once was a pleasant change.

And apparently, it was going to be a trend. The mom whose daughter I saved from her ex-husband and his family was all over the news as well. She said I came in like a warrior ready to do battle for her daughter and cut through all the crap. She didn't care if I was a wolf or alien and simply respected me for getting the job done and knowing how awesome I was.

I wasn't sure that was true, but I appreciated her singing my praises even if there were a few too many comments about me being a real dog now chasing down scents. Assholes.

And finally, there was the judge on the case, and I almost fell over when I saw his press conference. He admitted that he was a rude, old-school asshole—even if he didn't use that word—saying he was too sexist in his opinion of me and listened to rumors when he knew better than to do that in his profession.

That he still had reservations about my personal life but it wasn't for him to judge, and it wasn't his beliefs, so he got a healthy dose of coming off his high horse meeting me. He said that maybe it was what I deserved after having such horrible parents and childhood, but in the end it wasn't for him to say or judge, and that was between me and my god.

Then he asked for my forgiveness in how we first met. He said he'd never been more impressed with someone keeping their composure and professionalism when he'd been anything but. My mouth just dropped open, Perez enjoying seeing me so shocked.

The judge wasn't done though. He went on to say that I could have used his rudeness to smear his long career or just not care that it was trashed because I'm a very busy person with too much on her plate. But I cared about something like the legacy of an honorable judge I'd never even met and jumped through a lot of extra hoops because of that.

And that needed to be recognized in a world that didn't take the time for details. He would never forget it because his career is a point of pride for him. He's always run a clean court and wants to be remembered for that in a world with so much corruption.

He was glad to meet someone so like-minded, and he thanked me from the bottom of his heart that I preserved his legacy even if it took so much extra time away from my son and family. That I was a gem who cared in a world of so much horrible and even offered to help his family through something medical after he'd been so rude to me.

Basically, he couldn't say enough good things about my leadership and skills, much less my people and how diligent I was. Not just for my own work but how I was using the case to teach those under me to do things right and learn from the mess life was.

He felt like Chicago and the surrounding area were hitting a turning point for the better and I would be the leader we needed to make everything safer for our kids in the future. Plus, criminals—especially corrupt cops—had better watch out because I wouldn't stop until I saw them behind bars.

I checked no one slipped anything in my coffee and Perez might still be laughing but like seriously, that judge had been such a prick and then he gave that kind of glowing press conference about me? Yeah, most would check if they were high.

The guys liked their Father's Day presents from Topher… Even if they all gave me a lecture about not spending so much money. I nodded my head along with it, and none of them hid their frustration when it was clear that I wasn't remotely listening.

Brian busted me for having my earbuds in that my hair was covering. He's still a bit salty about that.

Yeah, well, they could stuff it. They don't tell Topher no either.

Eva being here is a huge help, like a ridiculously huge help. And I think Mauro seeing how much I'm struggling and the care Eva has to give a powerful female siren now from the eyes of an adult and not just his sibling helps him understand better, heal maybe.

My wolf isn't all healed and just okay, but she's at least letting me know when she's not comfortable making the call. So she'll let me know when someone is lying or when she wants to stay out of it.

That's fine. I was pissed she just left me hanging. I shouldn't leave everything on her all the time anyways, and as long as we're communicating, that's what's important. Really important.

Eva's already working with me on my new power. It's weird to go looking for a fight for me to basically cool it off, but she said I'm progressing faster than Alena. She said it's my lack of patience and how in tune I am with myself already. Probably my martial arts training but also my therapy which Alena had never attended.

For as closed off as I was, I tried really hard and opened myself up to suggestion… Which didn't seem all that closed off, but it was. I was different.

We all knew that.

She also made me realize that I needed to speak up more on what I needed. Well, I knew that, but she's forcing me to do it instead of pushing gently.

I asked for more meals with my guys. The breakfasts with Brian, and then Reagan helped me. We just talked and it was all calm instead of always in passing or loud groups or when there are issues. So for now it's breakfast or lunch with one of them, but maybe two would be better—I'm figuring it out.

And it seems rude to be like "bring me lunch," but… They can. Hagan and Reagan can. Dain can. They can make me a priority. They asked what I wanted and I want that. Dain only comes when we need to decide adult matters or there's an issue.

That feels like a business partnership, not a marriage. At least to me. I just wish he understood that or saw it as well. I think the twins do.

The weekends will be for those who work at the training center since we can only do breakfast, but—it's flexible and fluid. It's just the idea for now, and—we get too distant too fast and ignore problems. I can't ignore issues anymore or they can snowball into what happened with Carter.

And then I'm destroyed. No more of that.

Hopefully.

I have no clue what I'm doing there. I still haven't asked the question I'm dying to know and can't handle the answer to.

Did he touch her?

If he did, I would break, so I cannot handle asking. I think he did because no one is telling me that he didn't.

So we're back to limbo about the ancient coven. Some want Helmer to take over, but he doesn't want to. Others want Rayne to, but he doesn't want to either. Too fucking bad to both of them, and it would be temporary, soooo yeah, good time.

I don't know the answer either.

Ashley and her friends have helped with refugee kids going to school in the fall and got them set straight on how to handle American kids and potential pitfalls. Most of the parents are on board or at least understand it's better to get out in front of things without starting trouble and their rules, not look down on things. It won't be perfect and there will be hiccups, but I'm not worried.

The cop who gave us the tip on the whole case is a techie natural from what my guys tell me, and I gave the recommendation for Quantico. Galvin says they need more techs since the world is terrifying and he's in for the next class. The FBI is hiding him out until then, and the vamp movers already got his apartment boxed up and in storage.

Yeah, the DeKalb cops figured out fast it was him and there were some not-so-subtle death threats, so we've got him covered.

On the topic of death threats… The wolf who manipulated Carter will be getting some from me, so she better stay far, far away from me and my packs. And my people. Technically, she didn't do anything wrong—though I could argue several points on that—so she's not going to jail.

I do plan to have some harsh words with her Alpha and make sure that she's smacked around until she pulls her head out of her ass. He doesn't seem to give a shit one way or another, but he's smart enough to be scared of me, especially when I'm pissed.

And I'm pissed . I'm very, very, very fucking pissed .

Someone from his pack who met Carter at the last APA event caught on that he might be bonding with wolves and probably me from what he was getting. He knew it well because his grandma had been through a similar situation. So he discussed it with his Alpha.

The woman overheard and immediately signed up to become a trainee for the FBI with the sole intent of meeting Carter and trying to steal him from me. She thought if she could become his bonded wolf, she would sit pretty here in Chicago like the pampered lover of an ancient instead of a bitch in her shitty pack.

Fine, that wasn't exactly how they told me, but… I'm not wrong either.

I had some strong words about the Alpha gossiping and starting trouble for me instead of communicating what his wolf had sensed. We were supposed to be allies in the APA, and he better show his face at the next event so I can tell this to him directly or his pack would be banned.

So yeah, I was going to beat his ass publicly to make an example because I knew he needed the APA. Hell, my pack bought a ton from them, so I was extra pissed he didn't reach out to me.

And I couldn't bust this bitch for like fraud. All around, I'm pissed.

I told Dain I wanted a shirt and hoodie made saying I was pissed and to proceed with caution while I sort this all out.

I think I might get it after I snapped at him and threw his prepackaged kale meals at him that he'd loaded into my fridge like his fucking chores he was ticking off. Why could he never hear me on how that feels to me?

Why can I not let it go when so many other women would kill to be taken care of like that by their husbands? Another problem for another day because Phobie is going to get burned out on all of my bullshit.

So far there's been no backlash for the call with the president, but some of his aides and cabinet made it clear through official channels that I was an ungrateful bitch for not being a loyal dog to my master. And yes, they used those words specifically like they were being clever. It was hard not to send them pictures of my claws or maybe a nice dog leash for them.

Galvin made it clear back to them that they should go fuck themselves and Eva was planning a trip to DC to make it very clear they were stupid. The First Lady still hasn't apologized but has stopped saying shit about me... For the moment. That's all going to blow up for sure.

And I've filed a lawsuit against Galvin's ex-wife. Defamation? Slander? I forget. Dain told me, but he was shirtless, and we started sparring which led to me getting hot and bothered and sex. Whatever, we were fighting back. Fun.

The sex was at least.

The supe outreach events are doing amazing. People are thrilled and excited… And not just for the free food and what they can get out of it. I found that surprising, but it seems people want to genuinely learn the truth for themselves. The clip of me saying we weren't infecting people anywhere like the news was lying about circulated all over social media and made a ruckus.

Good. It should. Those lies were dangerous .

And stupid. They came out with a whole expose last month about how we're building armies of more shifters and hiding the numbers. The kicker? Their huge proof?

They used a shifter species that was non-infectious.

Yeah, really. Idiots.

Their whole expose was bullshit. The council put out a statement the next day, but I told Councilwoman Haton they needed to sue. Stop being so fucking passive and make people obey the damn law and enough with this shit. They went on their "news" network and told blatant lies about something completely impossible.

Start fucking holding them accountable.

The council might actually do it, which would be great. I was shocked someone didn't push me to do it but yeah, that would be a conflict with work especially when it wasn't my species.

And I start enough shit. Someone else tap in.

But the events are going well. People are showing up in droves and bringing kids. Some are treating it a bit too much like a petting zoo and it offended the shifters—which I understand—but I reminded them that while we all thought zoos were bad morally, they've taught kids to love animals. So if it means sucking it up and being a bit like a petting zoo—do it.

Do it so things get better and especially with the next generation. Seriously. I'd let every fucking kid in the US scratch my belly and play with my tail if they wanted so I never had to see another horror show like I did in Memphis. I was pretty sure everyone was on the same page after I said it like that.

It took about four events before protestors showed up. I think they were shocked how many came and wanted to be a part of it, probably thinking they would fail if it wasn't in liberal places like NYC. But people liked new and were curious by nature.

Luckily, the protestors were lame. Like a dozen, and their signs were ridiculous asking if we had our rabies shots and crap like that. I was pretty sure the shifters who were there are still laughing and the media caught that, so it really was pathetic.

We're almost done with the office overhaul and ahead of schedule. We've got a week off to get everyone moved to different floors so we can keep going, but it's been a lot less painful than we'd thought. And that is 100% because of the vamp painters and flooring guys. Our whole office knows that and keeps leaving food and treats for them with thank-yous.

Noah keeps cracking jokes that they love it and like they're good elves going in overnight to help. It's probably offensive to elves in some way, but I think he's funny. Plus, he's hot, so I'd smile even if they were lame jokes.

We did agree to let them go do the other offices since Perez will be there and promised to protect them. He's going to talk with each division chief and make it clear this is a line not to cross. To leave them alone because they've suffered enough and we need them to help the FBI handle this all quietly and quickly.

Now, if he could manage his marriage the same as the plan for the updates, that would be great. I adore his wife, and she's valid that this is too much to ask for his fucking job. I hope they work it out, and I offered him to use my planes and have the FBI pay for the fuel—whatever. She really is amazing and has put up with a lot.

Hell, he knows he's lucky that woman ever looked at him twice. She's a top-tier woman, so he needs to fix this. I think he's trying to get her dream job in Chicago… And I'm a bit worried I might be involved in that somehow.

Oh well, something else I'll have to clean up for someone.

Everything with the tech college is moving forward. Marc Swan was the right person to partner with. Most of his instructors are more than fine with having a fairy interpreter in their classes to help anyone who might need it and work with any of our refugees.

Laila loved the idea and is bringing in a few teachers who need a safe place to live along with their families. So they will help any who participate and hold additional classes for any to get their American GED so they're qualified. Marc was glad to hear that as well because there's only so much he can wave or give exceptions on before he's in trouble.

I understood that, but these were adults and not just some kids trying to start trouble or skip steps. As long as they could pass some sort of test showing they were intelligent enough to keep up with the material, that should be enough.

He agreed, so there's going to be some sort of shortened, general SAT-type test to cover basics and make sure people coming in have something to show. He promises it won't be AP Calculus on there but math needed for the courses and—none of it is a joke. But we have a month to work on what they need to know to pass before classes start.

He was definitely more on board when I said we were starting with a hundred but had more interest than that. And twenty at a time for the generalized construction courses.

Yeah, that was a lot of guaranteed tuition when the economy had taken a hit, and things weren't amazing for people to have extra expenses.

Brett has two different apartment buildings he's looking at while down there, and hopefully one of them works out. Or both. We could probably use both even if not for all the students. I'm not really sure, but someone in the pack will have to handle the management of it because I won't be able to.

Always expanding no matter how I keep trying to put the brakes on things.

Greg Camara's future was one of death. He was super dead once the investigation was over no matter my recommendation. The council said it was a nonstarter, and I wasn't going to argue for an asshole. He doesn't know it yet but yeah, cry me a river for the asshole.

The council wants him to be made an example of to keep makers safe from psycho fledglings but also as a glaring example of why not to turn people flippantly. They have been trying to make that a sticking point for a while because more humans want to become vampires instead of getting old or dying.

Fair enough, but to stay safe, vampires needed to be smarter. So yeah, they wanted Greg to be an example of why.

Again, I won't shed a tear or lose any sleep over it. His maker wasn't the only person he killed from what I'd already found. He killed a few in his last con in Nevada. We're working with the local police there to close some of their open cases and get the people there some answers.

Those people want his head as well, but who's even more pissed?

The people here who thought they were in the clear and their parents were locked away in some retirement home in Florida. Pulling back the curtain to fill them in on how fucked they were and how stupid they'd been would almost be funny if it wasn't all so serious and horrible. They all thought it was a done deal and there was nothing that could happen to them now.

Fools.

No, really, one demanded his money back if Greg didn't keep up his end of the deal.

His money? He stole it all and committed major fraud. He wasn't getting that somehow, his entitled brain seeing it all as his, and his parents were just in the way.

Seriously, it was hard not to give up on the world some days.

But it's huge, huge cases. The ADA we know, Russ, called me on the side and asked me to request to work with him on the stuff that would go to him. This is that big of a deal, and he wants the high profile of it.

Normally, I would stay away from that stuff and not get involved in the politics, but Russ genuinely wants the power to do good. He's tired of the bullshit and cases being passed over that should go to him because of politics or who's daddy has clout.

Or gives the right donations.

Brian and I agree that he would be the best option for the next DA so yeah, I'm cool with giving him recommendations. I made it clear to the DA that I wanted him handling it with my people because a few others in his office have been less than thrilled to be near a slut wolf or stupid rich bitch.

And I wasn't even making that up. The DA had made a crack that he didn't realize that Russ and I had become such buddies and I got snippy. I told him we shared a trauma for flying, not having nooners like people in his office ran their mouths about. So yeah, I wanted the clean ADA who I trusted and was actually professional.

He wasn't happy to hear that was what the FBI thought about his office, but the Chief of Police backed me up. Apparently, more than a few of the DA's office had been a bit loud in their opinions of me saying they were glad I mostly worked with the AG's office instead of them.

But also wondering if they could get a deal on an apartment if they were my friend like Havers did when he was human.

I made it clear that I expected him to handle his people better than that because if my people ever spoke about another office like that their asses would be grass. So what kind of leader was he?

Yeah, that might have been a bit much, but I was tired of the bullshit.

I had enough of that in my life already. Seriously.

Case in point, the humans who were working for Greg at the trailer park as jailers. He promised to make them all vamps which was hysterical since he was too young to do it and for a while. They weren't happy to learn that.

Too bad, so sad.

They tossed the elderly out on the streets and kept others captive with bogus everything saying it would be a real facility. Yeah, I gave a shit about them never.

And they would never recover all of their belongings. Some maybe since they didn't sell everything right away because they weren't that dumb, but a lot they tossed that didn't have monetary value.

But those were normally the things that meant the most to people.

It broke my heart, but at least we've found almost everyone who was evicted and they're safe. We're still missing two, but hopefully with all the press coverage we will find them soon.

At first, no one wanted to come in, but then once the news spread the trailer park was all fraud and shut down, the victims were flagging down any police officer to tell them who they were. The problem had been where to take them since a lot of them weren't in the best of shape being on the street at their age and some for months.

The local hospitals couldn't take that sudden influx, and now they didn't have insurance. In a miracle of kindness, someone started a GoFundMe for the victims to get hospital care, and it was Dr. Sloan who called me to suggest the supe hospital could take care of them.

They had the beds and space if a human nurse or doctor could take an extra shift to help out for issues they shouldn't handle as shifters. If the victims were willing to accept care from supes.

They were. Marie went on the news and made it clear that she was treated with great care and everyone was professional and gentle with her case.

Of course, she did. She had been out of the hospital for days already and staying at TimeQuake, but she inserted herself and made it clear the staff at the supe hospital were top-tier and knew who to call for human issues they weren't used to.

I think it was the project she needed because I heard she was talking with several law offices about getting them to take pro bono cases. I think Laila is sending a few attorneys as well who are licensed in Illinois to help with the DeKalb cops' suit.

They're talking also about suing the doctor's office that illegally declared them with medical conditions they don't have and signed off on bullshit. Also, the law firm that handled all the court everything and was involved. It would all be punitive and civil… But yeah, drain them for all the money they have to recover what those people lost.

How much are they owed in suffering damages from living on the streets? Millions. To me, it would be millions.

But I don't know the details, and I made it clear not to tell me and to keep me out of it. But yeah, Marie clearly needs to stay active, and this is her way to fight back? Phobie said it's not an unhealthy response to what she's been through but is worried that she might take it too far.

I'll check in on her. From what I already know, Marie wants to sell her grandmother's house once she gets it back. Marie said there's just too many bad memories there now and it feels dark. She wants to start over once it's all hers again.

I couldn't agree more. I put her in touch with Simone and told her she could have her pick of apartment from any of my new buildings. Marie was shocked to learn about all of it since it wasn't reported about, but I made it clear that we wanted it quiet.

Everyone involved in the doctor's and attorneys' offices is trying to take plea deals and point the fingers at everyone else now that they know the people weren't tucked away in Florida. How stupid to get involved with something so dark and not even fucking check?

I preferred criminals be stupid. It really made my job easier.

And honestly, I hope they all take plea deals or I will be testifying constantly for years. I'm not even kidding. There were a dozen cops. Ten humans working for Greg. A law office . A doctor's office. And dozens and dozens of people who did this to their family. Plus, those with the two courts that were involved.

Just thinking of how much I will have to testify makes me want to cry and quit. I hate testifying… But it's part of the job.

Stupid fucking job.

It is what it is, and I'm sure we'll uncover more people I will have to suffer for by testifying more. I should have become a cop. I hear they get paid extra for that or overtime.

No, that wouldn't have been worth it, and I could do more good with the FBI. I was just salty about too much.

The only good news was Dr. Sloan wasn't worried about Topher walking early. He looked at me like I was a goof for worrying my son was too advanced, especially when I was a genius. He did agree to try and keep it under wraps, but he promised Topher's body wouldn't let him walk if he wasn't ready.

Still, Dain and I made it clear he needs to cruise more by walking and holding onto people or the furniture. Especially around other people. I think Topher gets it. He's more focused on how all four of his dads are constantly trying to get him to say "Dada." He keeps looking at me like he's clearly missing something.

Oh yeah, a serious trap and pitfall because someone's going to be happy to hear it from him first and the others will be hurt. So I think he understands to do it next time they're all together and like group hug it. Hopefully, no one's feelings are hurt then.

They shouldn't be after they all got new fucking wheels.

But I also get it because I got Mama first and to see him walk.

Actually, Hagan hasn't been pushing. He hasn't really been anything. He's there but… Distant? Not in a bad way but more like he doesn't know what to say or do. I heard him say something to Phobie about a therapist who specialized in working on self-growth. I don't know if that will help, but I'm glad he wants to?

Yeah, I think I am.

Maybe once I can figure out my own damn head and shit with my wolf, I can make up my mind on that. I want him happy. That's what I know. I want us to all stop feeling like we're about to drown and completely overwhelmed.

That has to stop being our answer, and hopefully Mauro and Eva's sister maybe can help... Whenever she might be arriving.

For now, I'm taking Eva's advice to heart, and if I can fill in the blank with something negative, I'm trying to fill it in with something positive instead. At least from the people who love me. Some of the time... Fine, half of the time. That's progress.

The End