Chapter One

Mina

S ix Years Later

"Hey. How are you?" Theia asks, worry evident in her voice as soon as I answer my ringing phone.

"I'm okay," I promise my best friend, staring out the window as Nashville passes by in blurs that make my skin crawl. I think maybe I'm lying to her. I feel wispy and insubstantial, as if a stiff enough wind might blow me away. "It's strange being back here again after all this time."

When I left town four years ago, I didn't intend on ever coming back. There were too many memories and too much pain painting every inch of this city. Everywhere I looked, I remembered him. I saw him. I felt him.

I couldn't take it anymore. So I ran all the way to California… somewhere I felt like I could breathe.

Funny thing, though, my lungs didn't hurt any less in San Diego. The memories didn't haunt me any less frequently, either. I just learned to live with Grayson's ghost constantly looming on the peripheral.

My gaze falls to the date tattooed on my wrist, tears blurring my vision. "It still feels like he's everywhere here," I admit, my throat raw. "I guess it always will."

"You never had closure," Theia whispers. "We see it a lot with families who lost a service member overseas on classified missions or those who don't have remains returned to them. They're frozen in grief because there's no resolution. They need answers or need to see a body to move forward but can't. It's called ambiguous loss."

I guess she probably understands the ins and outs of grief like this better than anyone. She works with the families of veterans at a nonprofit in San Diego. Her husband is a veteran himself.

"Black pit of loss would be more fitting," I mutter, only partially kidding. It is a big black pit…and I've been swimming in it for six years. Ever since Grayson flew to Mexico and disappeared.

I spent the first year praying for a miracle, hoping against hope that he'd come back. That he was being held hostage somewhere and that he'd materialize. I spent the next year harassing every official in Mexico City for information, trying to piece together where he went when he got off that plane and what happened to him.

All anyone could tell me was what we already knew—they found his rental wrecked with blood all over it. They dug around for a little while and then wrote him off as a lost cause, killed for being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

It wasn't good enough for me. I needed answers.

I looked for them everywhere, but no one could tell me anything. Eventually, I had to accept that he wasn't coming back. Grayson died in Mexico…and part of me died, too.

I'm not sure that I'll ever be ready to move on.

He was the love of my life.

He's the father of my child.

And he never even got to meet our daughter. Never even knew I was pregnant, actually. I found out about Brinley a week after he went missing. I thought it was just exhaustion and stress causing a stomach virus to linger. But it was Grayson's little girl growing in my belly.

It took four months before I could even tell anyone because I couldn't say the words out loud without feeling like I was going to splinter apart. I just kept clinging to hope that he'd come back and I could tell him first.

He never did.

I gave birth alone. I raised her alone. Every milestone, every birthday, every challenge I've faced alone. Because my husband vanished in Mexico.

If there's a guidebook that helps you heal from that, I haven't read it yet. And I've read a whole lot of books trying to navigate this grief.

"It would be more fitting," Theia agrees. "But you know therapists prefer fancy-pants words. Big black pit is not fancy pants enough."

"True." I smile despite myself. "Speaking of fancy pants…"

"If you're going somewhere glamorous right now in the back of a limo, we might not be friends anymore," she says, teasing me.

"I am, actually," I laugh quietly and then groan. "This is so bizarre."

"What?"

"I just inherited a law firm I don't want," I mutter. "Now, instead of doing school drop-offs and drinking cheap wine from the bottle, I have backstage passes to the biggest music festival in Nashville because I'm supposed to be meeting and greeting famous people who now kinda rely on me?"

My dad died six weeks ago, leaving his company to me. We weren't even on speaking terms and hadn't been since…well, since Grayson disappeared, honestly. He was the reason Grayson was in Mexico in the first place. Him and his need to control my life. If he'd just left us alone, Grayson would still be here. Brinley would have her dad. My life wouldn't be shattered to pieces.

But he couldn't do that. He hated that I chose a man like Grayson instead of a man like him. Grayson was good enough to use but not good enough for me to marry. So, my dad did everything he could to keep us apart. And in the end, he got exactly what he wanted because Grayson is gone.

I've never been able to forget that. I was never able to forgive my dad for it, either. He tried to make amends. He did everything he could to help me look for Grayson. But it was too little too late.

Because of him, my daughter will never meet her father. She'll never hug Grayson. She'll never look into his eyes. She'll never hear his laugh or see his smile.

If leaving me a law firm I never wanted is supposed to be some big, final apology, it feels more like one final ploy to control my life. Because now I have to figure out what to do with the damn thing. Sell it? Give it away? Run it into the freaking ground? Actually try to run it right?

The petty part of me wants to dismantle it brick by brick as a great big middle finger to my dad.

Six years ago, I probably would have burned the damn thing to the ground without hesitation. But my rage has cooled since then. And I've matured. It won't hurt him if his company falls apart. He's gone.

The only people who suffer if I drive it into the ground are the bands and artists who rely on the company to look after their interests. I can't blow up entire careers because I'm still mad at my dad.

"My bestie is a big wig in Nashville," Theia teases before sobering. "Have you decided what you're going to do?"

"I have no idea." I huff a breath, leaning back in the seat with my eyes closed. I've been in town for almost weeks, and I still don't have my feet beneath me. "Any chance you know anyone who wants to run a multi-million-dollar entertainment law firm that has a full roster of rich and famous clientele?"

"Uh, no." Theia laughs.

"Figured you were going to say that."

"On the bright side, at least you get to meet all the fancy pants people, drink expensive wine, and see concerts for free while you're figuring it out," she says. "So it's not all bad."

"I need so much wine right now," I whisper, making her laugh. "Brinley was pissed that she couldn't come with me tonight. She said I was ruining her life by not letting her meet Kasen Alexander."

Laughter burbles down the line. "I'm on her side. I'd do shady things to meet him, too."

"Yeah, but you aren't five!"

"True." Theia laughs loudly. "Just ask him to sign something for her if you see him. You'll bet the best mom ever again in no time."

"Until she remembers I just moved her across the country," I mutter, sighing heavily. My daughter is going to take over the world one day…or destroy it trying. She is five going on fifteen. She's sassy, loud, and opinionated as hell. And right now, she is not very happy with me. I just ripped her away from everything she knew to bring her to Nashville. Her whole life changed overnight, and she doesn't understand why.

Most kids would be thrilled to go from a tiny duplex to a mansion overnight. Not Brinley. She wants her life back, not the one my dad just foisted on us. And honestly? I don't blame her one bit. I don't want this life, either.

I want the one that was stolen from us six years ago. It's all I've ever wanted. But I'll never have that. All I have are memories that haunt me and the daughter Grayson and I made.

Somehow, it has to be enough to sustain me for the rest of my life.

"Mina!" Riley Jamison throws her hand up, waving me over as soon as I enter the area roped off for VIPs. I sigh in relief when I see her familiar face and immediately make a beeline toward her, grateful as hell there's somewhere here I know, at least somewhat.

She owns a talent agency in town. She stopped by to introduce herself after the funeral. I guess my dad's lawyers help negotiate the contracts for most of her clients. She wants me to keep the company, but I don't know the first thing about entertainment law or intellectual property law, and I don't have a hankering to learn.

I do like her, though.

"Hey," I say, giving her a genuine smile as I reach her side.

She wraps an arm around me in a quick hug. "I'm glad you made it. It's a freaking madhouse here! Oh. Mina, this is Addison Devine, one of my managers. Her husband is performing tonight. Addison, meet Mina."

"Hi," I murmur, smiling at the petite, curvy brunette standing at Riley's side. She's beautiful, but she looks as anxious to be here as I feel. "It's nice to meet you."

"Hi," Addison whispers, her voice barely audible over the roar of the crowd. She gives me a shy smile. "I'm glad you're here." Her eyes fly open wide, her cheeks turning red as if she just remembered why I'm in Nashville. "Oh! I didn't mean…"

"It's okay." I place a hand on her arm, trying to reassure her. "I knew what you meant. And I'm glad I'm here too." I laugh softly. "My daughter may shiv me when I get home, though."

Riley's eyes light up. "You have a daughter?"

"I do. Brinley is five." I roll my eyes. "Going on fifteen."

"She sounds like she'd get along excellently with my oldest daughter," Riley laughs. "Tia hates the word no. Her daddy is the only one who can do anything with her. Naturally, he's wrapped around her little finger."

The comment is innocent, but memories of Grayson are too close to the surface. It feels like a dagger stabbing me right in the heart. Brinley won't ever have Grayson wrapped around her finger. She'll never have him at all.

Something of my thoughts must show on my face because Riley reaches for my arm, her expression falling. "I said something, didn't I?"

"No, of course not," I whisper quickly, shaking my head. "I just…" I clear my throat. "Brinley's dad died before she was born."

"Oh, Mina." Riley's expression wells with empathy as she throws her arms around me in a fierce hug. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to bring up a painful subject for you on a fun night out." She hesitates, nibbling on her bottom lip. "Can I be honest with you?"

"Of course."

"I didn't start working with your dad until a couple of years ago," she admits softly. "I didn't even know you existed until the funeral. He never mentioned you. So I'm sorry in advance if I say the wrong thing. I don't mean any harm."

Of course he didn't mention me. Once upon a time, I was his pride and joy. And then I chose Grayson. I don't think he ever really forgave me for that. He had plans for my life, and none of them involved a foul-mouthed, tattooed guitarist he found living on the streets or a tiny little apartment. They didn't involve me getting married and pregnant at nineteen, either. Guess he stopped talking about me after I moved to San Diego. Why bother bringing up the widowed, single-mother daughter who hated him?

"We weren't on speaking terms," I say. "We hadn't been for most of the last six years." I exhale a quick breath, pasting a bright smile on my face. "So being back here is bringing up a lot of old memories. But please don't apologize. You don't know what you don't know."

Addison reaches for my hand, squeezing gently. "Memories are brutal sometimes, aren't they?"

I bob my head, grateful she seems to understand. "They're hell, honestly. But I don't want to think about that tonight. I'm here to have fun and meet everyone before I figure out what to do with this company." I force a laugh that falls flat to my own ears. "I'm pretty sure keeping a company because my five-year-old wants to marry Kasen Alexander in twenty years isn't a sound business decision."

Addison covers her mouth with her hand, fighting laughter when Riley groans loudly.

"What?" My brows furrow.

"Kasen," Riley mutters like she's announcing she has the plague, exasperation written all over her face. "That man is the bane of my freaking existence."

"Ah. Client?"

"Client. Problem child. Man I'd like to murder." She bounces her shoulders in a shrug. "Same difference, right?"

"They're practically siblings," Addison says, smiling.

I smile, bemused that I'm having this conversation right now. Two months ago, I was drinking cheap wine in the bathtub, listening to Kasen on the radio. That was the future I had all mapped out. Not…whatever this is.

Maybe I'm supposed to be grateful for this, but in this moment, I'm not. I feel like my entire world is spinning out of control because of my father again. Last time, I had to keep it together for Brinley. I was pregnant. I had to survive so she did. Maybe it's wrong to blame a dead man for feeling like I'm right back there again, teetering on the edge of hysteria, but I'm mad as hell that I'm being dragged right back to that place, being forced to face the same things, all because he decided to leave me his stupid company.

Maybe it's childish, but I don't care. I'm mad at him for dying and leaving me the company. I'm mad that Grayson is dead, and I'm alone. I'm just…sick and tired of my life being collateral damage because of my father. But I can't say that.

So I just smile instead. So big it feels like it's going to crack my lips.

Someone bumps into me from behind, knocking me forward into Addison.

Riley scowls daggers at the man until he mutters a quick apology and scurries out of view.

"Come on." She loops her arm through mine. "Let's go sit before we get trampled."

"I don't even know where my seat is," I mutter, reaching for my lanyard to check the seat number stamped on the back.

"Doesn't matter." Riley waves me off. "You're sitting with us up front. You can tell us about your daughter and your life before you inherited this company, and I can tell you all the reasons we need another female CEO in this city. None of which have anything to do with Kasen, by the way."

"Riley," Addison says, her voice soft.

"What?" Riley pauses, a frown pulling at her lips. "Oh! That wasn't me trying to get you to spill the beans about your daughter's dad. You don't have to tell us anything you don't want to tell us."

"There isn't much to tell," I murmur as we squeeze through the crowd. "We met, fell in love young, and got married. And then he was killed, so I moved to San Diego with my aunt and had Brinley there."

It's the same answer I give everyone…complete bullshit. But the truth? Well, I've never had that. I wish I did, though.

God, I wish I did.