7. Ella

7

ELLA

T he second we stepped foot in the stadium, something settled inside me.And it only got better when Letty and Peyton explained that we’d be sitting in the stands with the fans, not in a family box. I always loved being in the thick of it, and I’d be lying if I said I wouldn’t be disappointed if we were closed off in the luxury of a box.

I’ve spent too long watching games behind a screen, silently rooting for my boys.

Even before the game started, the buzz around the stands was just like I remembered. It didn’t matter that the walls, the seats, the jerseys around me were blue, not purple. The desire to win, the hunger, the excitement, were still the same.

But nothing compared to the moment the Saints came running out onto the field.

My eyes searched for Kane and Luca, just like my girls did. But I didn’t linger on them for long; I needed to see someone else.

Someone I hadn’t seen in the flesh for years. Someone whose name and number were currently printed on my jersey.

And the second I found him, in full uniform with his helmet on and a determined look in his eye, it was like the world was pulled from beneath me.

Even though he was wearing pads, he was bigger, stronger, more powerful, and more breath-taking than I ever remember. He stole every ounce of my attention as he prepared to go head-to-head with the Bulls.

I wasn’t na?ve; I knew who was on the Bulls roster. I knew who he was going to be going up against. It might have been petty, but I was desperate to see Colt wipe the floor with Sawyer. For a few months back in freshman year at college, I thought Sawyer Cooper was the one. He was everything I thought I wanted. Athletic, intelligent, funny, fit AF. He had no idea who Ella Myers from Texas was. All he saw was confident, outgoing Ella Myers, a student at Maddison Kings University.

But it wasn’t meant to be. He was great, but it soon became apparent he wasn’t the one. My eyes were wandering elsewhere—and so were his, I discovered after finding a pair of panties in his room that did not belong to me.

If the current situation wasn’t so painful, I might laugh at the similarities.

I should have cared when I found them. But mostly, I’d felt relieved. We’d had our fun, and it was time to move on. And move on I did. Because the next guy rocked my entire world, to the point that all these years on, I’m still feeling the tremors.

I didn’t speak—hell, I’m not even sure if I took a breath—as the game started and I got the pleasure of watching our incredibly talented boys boss the field and show the Bulls exactly how it’s done.

By the time Colt scores the final touchdown, my throat is raw and my voice is practically gone from how much I’ve screamed for all of them.

On either side of me, Letty and Kyan, and Peyton bounce up and down in excitement. We’re surrounded by other members of the team’s families. I’ve been introduced to a few but honestly, I’ve already forgotten. My anxiety and excitement over seeing Colt are too potent to focus on anything else.

The guys bounce around together on the sidelines, clapping each other on the back and bumping helmets before the three of them huddle together and turn our way.

I heard Letty talking to Kane on the phone before we left their home earlier, but I excused myself to give her some privacy, so I’ve no idea if she told him that I was here.

Although, from the lack of shock on his face when he looks at me, I get my answer.

My gaze doesn’t linger on him though, or Luca. Instead, my eyes are locked on someone else.

Colton Rogers.

The man who stole my heart all those years ago, despite telling me that he couldn’t be trusted with it.

My chest heaves, my heart pounds, and my entire body trembles with nerves and anxiety as he searches the crowd.

The second he finds us, everything around me vanishes. The screaming fans disappear until it’s just us that exist.

It’s intense, but it’s nothing compared to the moment our eyes lock.

He stills as shock rocks through him, and the crackle of chemistry that was always loud and powerful between us reawakens. I’d convinced myself that it would have died after all this time. But it seems I may have been lying to myself. Even through his helmet, I see his eyes widen, but that is all he gives away as he steps forward from his teammates.

Lifting his hand, he undoes his helmet and rips it from his head, giving me an uninterrupted view of his paint-covered, sweaty face.

“Holy fuck,” I mutter as I remember just how freaking hot he is. And it’s not just his looks, which should be freaking illegal. But his size, his power, his confidence. All of it talks to me on a level no one else ever has.

If only he wasn’t the ultimate player who never wants to settle for one woman , a little voice pipes up, reminding me of the red flags that come along with Colton Rogers and his wicked smirk and come-fuck-me eyes.

God damn him for being so perfect yet unattainable.

It feels like our connection lasts an eternity, but then the second he’s dragged away by more members of the team to celebrate, I realize that it was nowhere near long enough.

“Holy crap, girl. That was intense,” Peyton shouts over the chaos surrounding us.

Licking my lips, I swallow slowly, desperately trying to get my body under control.

“Intense?” Letty scoffs. “It was hot. I thought you were going to go up in flames from that look alone. Years of remembering how awesome you are rocked through that man in five seconds flat.”

“I bet he’s still thinking about it,” Peyton says, just as Colt turns back toward us. “See,” she says smugly.

His eyes find me with little effort and my lips pop open.

“He never forgot you, Ella. You can tell yourself as many lies as you like about the two of you not meaning anything to him, or him seeing you differently now,” Letty says, leaning right into my ear so that no one else will hear, “but that is not the reaction of someone who isn’t interested in what you have to offer.”

I want to believe her. I really, truly do. But I’ve been so beaten down by life, by my own mental health as well as by Chad, that I’ve no idea how to overcome all those things and do so.

Spotting me a few feet away under the harsh lights of a stadium and seeing me standing before him in real life, allowing him to see what the past few years have done to me, are very different things.

“It’s just shock, Letty. I’m sure my presence will make very little impact on his new life.”

She chuckles as if she knows something I don’t.

“You want to put money on that?”

“No, not really. I don’t have any,” I sulk.

I’m not bitter about my friends’ successes or the lifestyles that have come with it. They deserve everything they’ve worked so hard for, and then some. But seeing Letty’s house, being part of just a snapshot of her and Kane’s, and Peyton and Luca’s lives, makes me realize just how much of a struggle the past few years have been financially as well as physically and mentally.

Really, the whole thing has been a clusterfuck of epic proportions while my friends have all been building these incredible lives.

“Yeah, probably for the best anyway,” Letty muses as the cheering around us finally begins to die down. “You’d lose.”

“She’s not wrong,” Peyton adds, reaching over to take Kyan from Letty’s arms when he begins to get restless. It’s late, and the poor little guy looks like he’s about to pass out.

We stand there watching the teams as they soak up the atmosphere, celebrate their win and mourn their loss. But it doesn’t matter how many bodies walk around that field; my eyes only find one.

He shakes hands and bumps knuckles with Bulls players and coaching staff before celebrating with his own, and long before I’m ready, he disappears down the tunnel with the rest of the team.

With their beloved Saints gone, a calm ripples through the stadium.

“Well,” I say as Letty begins gathering Kyan’s things. “That was?—”

“Enlightening?” Peyton asks.

“Let’s get this boy into the car and we can dissect everything in detail while we watch the interviews and drink cocktails,” Letty says.

My stomach does a weird summersault at just the thought of seeing Colt on TV tonight.

Although, I guess it could be worse. It could be in person.

Kyan is out for the count before we even manage to get out of the Saints parking lot. My heart swells watching his eyelashes flicker and his lips move as he floats off into dreamland, hugging his Saints bear to his chest.

I know he’s too young to appreciate it, but one day, he’s going to be in that crowd and appreciate just how much of a legend his dad really is. I can’t even imagine how mind-blowing that will be.

Watching some of my best friends play and win is a rush, but someone you love, your hero, out there doing incredible things…I shake my head. I can’t even comprehend it.

“You do realize that you and Kane make the world’s cutest babies, right?” I ask as Letty hits the highway, heading for home.

“I’m totally biased, but yes, I agree.”

“He was on fire tonight,” Peyton muses.

“They all were. It’s like they knew they had an extra supporter or something,” Letty says, her eyes finding mine briefly in the rearview mirror.

I let out a pained sigh. “Don’t even pretend like you didn’t tell Kane I was here,” I tease. “Neither he nor Luca were shocked to find me standing with you.”

“It might have slipped out.”

“Didn’t look like they shared the intel though, did it? Not sure I’ve ever seen Colt that blindsided,” Peyton points out.

She’s not wrong. Colt has always been a roll-with-the-punches kinda guy. He had his end goal in mind, and nothing ever fazed him. The house could have been burning down around him and he’d have just walked out calmly after grabbing his most prized possessions as if everything was cool.

It’s why his reaction to seeing me was so unnerving.

He genuinely looked like someone had just run up and kicked him in the balls.

“Me neither. It was like someone tugged the grass right out from under his feet.”

“Oh, the power little Miss Myers holds over that hunk of a man.”

“Stop,” I plead. “Whatever was between the two of us was years ago. And as I’m sure you remember, it was never serious because?—”

“Because he was a fucking idiot who couldn’t see what was right in front of him?” Peyton offers.

“No. Because the only long-term relationship he’s interested in is one with an inanimate object that just happens to be covered in pig skin and white stitching.”

“A lot can change, El,” Letty points out.

Don’t I fucking know it.

“Oh yeah, because every post and article about Colton Rogers really points out how he’s changed when he’s got a different girl on his arm in every photo. Pretty sure I read recently that he’s Seattle’s number one bachelor and that any girl who manages to tie him down must be some kind of glittery unicorn, or some horse shit along those lines.”

They both laugh, sharing knowing glances with each other.

“What?”

“Is there any article about him that you haven’t read?” Letty teases.

“I’m not like…a stalker or anything,” I defend with a huff, folding my arms over my chest. “I keep tabs on all of you. On the guys’ success and stats.”

“And the girls they might be dating?” Peyton twists around to look at me with her brow lifted. “Are Brax and West currently whoring it up, or are they dating properly?”

My lips open and close as I try and summon up an answer.

“Fine,” I concede. “I don’t know.”

“El, give it up. We know you still care about him. We know that if he were to ask you to jump, you’d immediately ask how high. It’s just how it is with the two of you.”

“Yeah, to my detriment,” I mutter bitterly.

“Sometimes these things take a while to work themselves out,” Peyton says with a little too much hope in her tone. “Look at me and Luc. We could have got our shit sorted years before we figured everything out.”

“Colt and I, we’re…we’re not the same.”

“No. You’re not. You’re following your own path and figuring your own shit out in your own time.”

“There is nothing to figure out. We’ve always been nothing,” I argue.

The irritating pair share another look as Letty takes the exit toward her incredible house.

Thankfully, the conversation changes, albeit slightly, and they focus on the game and how the guys played before turning their attention to Sunday’s game against the Chicago Chiefs. The game I was initially invited here to watch.

My cell buzzes in my pocket. I turned it on while Letty was talking to Kane earlier and finally called Mom to let her know where I was. There were messages from Chad, but I haven’t read them. I’m not sure I will.

Pulling it free, I look down at the screen and smile. It’s as if he knew I was thinking about him.

I can’t help but laugh at his name. He saved it in there on our first day as freshmen and it’s remained ever since. A reminder that I really never need about the size of that boy’s ego.

Weston Motherfuckerfucking Rogers: YOU’RE IN SEATTLE!

Ella: Well, gossip sure does spread fast, huh?

Weston Motherfuckerfucking Rogers: Pfft, no one tells me shit. Saw you in the crowd at the end of the game. Big bro wasn’t expecting that, was he?

A loud groan rips from my throat, making both Letty and Peyton look back at me.

“You okay?”

“West,” I say, holding up my cell. “Some idiot with a camera apparently caught the whole thing.”

“Oh my god. Are you serious?” Letty gasps.

“Oh, I hope they got a close-up of Colt’s face,” Peyton says, immediately diving into her own cell, searching for the evidence.

“Let’s hope not, eh? The last thing I need is for the media to pick up on this and make me public enemy number one for stealing the playboy’s attention for even a second. Will you two stop doing that?” I snap when they do that know-all look again.

Back in the day, I’d have been the one sharing that look with Letty.

My phone buzzes again, thankfully distracting me from my depressing, lonely thoughts.

Weston Motherfuckerfucking Rogers: When you see him, smack him upside the head for being a cock. He deserves it.

A small smile twitches at my lips.

Weston Motherfuckerfucking Rogers: Tell me you’re staying in Seattle for our game. I miss you

Ella: I haven’t made any plans. Being here was a bit of a last-minute thing.

Weston Motherfuckerfucking Rogers: What happened?

Ella: If I’m still here this weekend, I’ll tell you everything. But just know, I’m finally free and single…if you wanted to take your shot.

Weston Motherfuckerfucking Rogers: In a fucking heartbeat, you know that baby girl. But I want to live to see a few more games yet. AND some of us took that pact seriously.

A weird mix of fondness and pain twists up my heart as I think about more of our college gang.

Ella: Whatever. Water under the bridge.

The girl who smashed that friendship pact all those years ago is long gone.

Weston Motherfuckerfucking Rogers: Enjoy celebrating tonight and I’ll see you this weekend, YES???

Ella: We’ll see.

Weston Motherfuckerfucking Rogers: Just tell me how much it’ll cost to keep you there and I’ll wire it in a heartbeat.

With a soft smile playing on my lips and warm fuzzies in my belly, I lower my cell to my lap.

“West wants me to stay for the weekend,” I confess as we pull up in front of Letty and Kane’s house.

“I hope you told him yes,” she says before killing the engine and pushing the door open.

“Uh…”

“The answer is yes, Ella. You’re not going back to Texas. Not until you have a plan.”

“But I have a life there, a job, a?—”

Letty glares at me, silently asking, do you?

“Okay fine, the only thing I have there to go back for is Mom.”

“Quit your job, El. Move here. Our guest room is yours until you figure everything out. You deserve to be surrounded by people who love you, your friends.”

“But—”

“No buts. Just…think about it.” She slams the door closed, and Peyton quickly follows, leaving me in silence for a beat.

Could I do it? Could I leave my miserable life behind and start over?