Chapter 27

Delaney

Today is Thanksgiving, and I can no longer avoid everyone. I’ve sure done a good job up until now, though.

After waking up the morning following Halloween night, I quickly realized that hooking up with all three of my stepbrothers wasn’t just a dream.

The evidence was clear in the form of Logan’s dried cum between my thighs.

Knowing I haven’t been good at consistently taking my birth control, I showered and headed to the pharmacy to grab a Plan B.

When I got back to my dorm, I was hit with gut-wrenching guilt. I have never been so conflicted in my life.

I felt like I cheated on Kai, only Logan and the guys came before him. There’s always been those lingering feelings between Elijah, Owen, and me, not to mention the intense ones between Logan and me.

But I haven’t been actively dating them. However, I wasn’t dating Kai either, not really. We were only running together. Apart from when Kai brought me to his place to tend to my hand, we’ve not gone back to his place. Just running or seeing each other in class.

Speaking of World History, I’ve missed a month’s worth of classes. I haven’t been able to bring myself to look Kai in the eyes and tell him that, even though he made his feelings and intentions for me clear, I fucked three other guys.

Okay, well, dry-humped one, sucked down another, and fucked the third, but it’s pretty much the same thing.

I’ve been ignoring his calls and texts and avoiding him like the plague.

I feel horrible. He deserves better, deserves an explanation, at least. But I don’t know how to give him one.

I’m running from my problems, but maybe this is my breaking point.

The guys aren't the only thing I’m avoiding. I’m on the verge of getting kicked out of the photography club. If it wasn’t for Winter taking over my job, I would have already been replaced a long time ago.

That girl is amazing. I don’t deserve a friend like her.

But she says she understands and is willing to help until I get my head in the right place.

I know I can’t run forever. I plan on messaging Kai back after I get through this dinner with my family.

Winter and Justin are going to be there, too. Both of their parents are away for the holiday, and my mom and James were more than happy to have them over. So, at least I won’t be totally alone.

God, I am not looking forward to this at all. How am I going to look any of them in the eye?

I still can’t believe that night actually happened, and I hate how much I loved it. Fucking hell, did I ever love it. The way Owen talked, the dirty words that left his mouth, the confident masculinity. And the way Logan just lost all control, this primal need for me and only me. It was a new side to both of them I’ve never seen before.

Would I have if I had gotten to know them?

“You just going to stand out here all day?” Winter asks me as she comes to sit next to me. I’ve been sitting on the edge of the fountain for the past hour, just staring at the front door, thinking.

“Maybe?” I sigh, looking at my best friend.

“You're a big girl, Laney. You can do this. You're the one who got yourself into this situation.”

“Thanks for reminding me,” I groan, leaning forward with my face in my hands.

“Do you know how hard it is to see both my besties hurting? Elijah is doing his best to give you the time you need, by the way. If you don’t think anything will happen between the two of you, maybe you should let him go. Let them all go.”

The idea has my stomach rolling and panic fluttering through me. “I don’t think I could ever let them go, Winter, not really.”

“But you can’t leave them in a state of limbo for the rest of your lives either. They’ve told you what they want, now you need to tell them what you want.” I go to open my mouth, but she keeps talking before I can say anything. “And before you say the stepbrother thing, or the Stacy thing, you need to think. What matters more? The chance your parents get upset or you being unhappy. You’re adults, you don’t even have to tell your parents right away if you don’t want to. And if they love you, like I know they do, they will just want you to be happy.”

I hate how right she is. Am I the one who’s made all this more complicated than it needs to be? Thinking far more into it than I should have.

The idea of messing with my mom’s happiness, of letting her down, scares me. I never want her to be disappointed in me.

“Fine,” I sigh. “Let’s say I agree with you about the stepbrother thing. That doesn’t change the issue with Stacy. She doesn’t want me with Logan. She doesn’t want anyone with him. And until she’s out of his life, it could never work.”

She doesn’t say anything because she knows I’m right. “I’m gonna head back inside. Supper was just getting served when I came out to get you. Justin, the guys, your mom, James, James’ sister and her stepson are in there. Jefferson, her husband, couldn't make it due to work.”

I forgot about that. Mom mentioned James’ sister was going to be there. I didn’t get to meet her at the wedding because she was out of the country on a business trip and couldn’t come.

“I’ll be in soon, I just need a few more minutes.”

She smiles and nods before heading into the house.

“You can do this, Laney. You’re an adult, and if you’re going to make adult choices, you need to deal with the consequences. Go in there, talk to them. That’s all you’ve got to do.”

And tell them what? That I’m willing to stop denying them and give in? What about Kai? Can I just let him go?

Is Kai even an option anymore? I’m sure he hates me, probably moved on.

No, I don’t think he has because every morning, he hangs outside my dorm for an hour, just in case I wanted to run.

I never go outside. I miss it. I miss running with him. The freedom of feeling safe when he is around.

I’ve been tempted to come back here in the morning and run within the walls of the property, but that’s stupid.

“Here goes nothing,” I sigh and finally get my ass inside the house.

I’m met with a chorus of voices and a mix of mouth-watering smells. I want that turkey and gravy more than anything. And my mom’s mashed potatoes are to die for.

Following the voices to the dining room, I grow more and more nervous the closer I get. At least Benny is going to be here; he’s the one I can’t wait to see the most. I bet he’s grown so much already. I can’t believe he’s ten months old.

The first person I see through the entrance to the room is Mom. She’s sitting at the end of the table, James on her right, Benny’s high chair on the left.

She turns her head and smiles when she sees me. She stands up and walks towards me. “There’s my sweet girl.”

“Hey, Mama. Sorry, I’m late. Everything smells amazing,” I tell her as I hug her tightly.

“All that matters is you're here. Come, sit down. I saved you a seat next to Benny.”

Giving her a smile of my own, I turn my attention to the table. Logan is across the table, next to his dad and Owen’s on the other side of him. At the other end of the table is a woman I haven’t met yet. That must be James’ sister.

“Delaney, this is James’ sister, Teresa. Teresa, this is my daughter, Delaney.”

The older woman gives me a friendly smile. She looks to be in her fifties. “Hi.” I give her a little wave. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you as well. James has told me a lot about you. Sorry, we didn’t meet at the wedding.”

“Oh, and we can’t forget Teresa’s stepson. Delaney, this is Malachi.”

My eyes drift over to the man sitting next to Teresa on her right, and my whole world stops.

His stormy grey eyes meet mine, and my stomach drops.

No. No fucking way. This can’t be happening. You have got to be fucking kidding me.

“Kai?” I let out a hysterical laugh. “This is some sick fucked up joke, right?”

“Delaney!” Mom hisses. “Manners.”

“Delaney.” Kai pushes his chair back and stands.

“Do you two know each other?” Mom asks, and I can feel everyone’s eyes on me.

I can’t stop laughing. It’s coming out a bit hysterical and panicked.

“Delaney,” Kai says again, taking a step towards me.

“Stop.” I suck in a breath, shaking my head. “Don’t. Just don’t.”

“What the hell is going on?” Logan’s booming voice sounds, but I don’t look away from Kai’s worried gaze.

“I can’t do this. This can not be happening.” I shake my head as I turn around and leave the room.

“Delaney!” Mom calls out.

But it’s not her who follows after me, it’s Kai.

“Sweetheart.” He grabs my arm, pulling me to a stop just as I get to the fountain in the front of the house.

“Did you know?” I shout, spinning around to face him. “Did you know who I was?”

“Not when we first met,” he promises. “When I found out your real name on the first day of class, I knew the last name sounded familiar. I couldn’t place it. After some thinking, I remembered my stepmom’s brother just married someone with the same last name. I knew she had a kid, I didn’t remember her name. I didn’t try to find out because I wasn’t sure if I wanted the answers.”

“Why? Because if you knew who I was, you wouldn’t have pursued me?”

He reaches up and cups my face. I let him, craving his touch. “Nothing, and I mean nothing, would have kept me from making you mine.” His voice is hard, confident, and promising. “I was just afraid that if it was true, and you knew who I was, you wouldn’t want me.”

It’s strange to see this big, burly-looking man look so vulnerable. “Because that would mean you’re my step... cousin?”

He lets out a laugh. “I guess so? With that, on top of the fact I’m your professor and there’s this big age gap between us, I thought it would be too much, too overwhelming. So, I guess I kept myself in the dark. If I didn’t know, it wouldn’t be an issue. I know. Stupid.”

He brushes his thumb against my cheek, eyes boring into mine. “My head is a mess right now,” I whisper.

“Tell me, Sweetheart.” He leans forward, putting his forehead to mine. “Tell me how I can make this better?”

“How do you not hate me?” I ask.

He pulls back with a frown. “How on earth could you think I hate you?”

“I’ve ghosted you for a month, Kai. I’ve stopped running with you, I ignored your calls and texts. Hell, I’ve skipped out on classes.”

“I know,” he says softly. “And it’s been eating at me. Not because you're avoiding me but because I know you’re going through something, and I just want to be there for you. To help in any way that I can. I wasn’t going to let you run for much longer, Sweetheart. I was giving you time to come to me. But if you didn’t, I would have come for you.”

“Kai.” My eyes water as my voice breaks. This man... this man is one I don’t deserve. He’s so sweet, kind, and understanding. Any other guy would have been pissed, moved on by now. But not him.

“Shh,” he soothes. “Everything will be okay.”

“You don’t know that.” My heart aches as he wipes my tears away. “There’s still so much you don’t know. The reason why I’ve been avoiding you, for starters.”

“Whatever it is, I’m sure we can work through it.”

“What the fuck is this?” Owen’s voice has my head snapping to the side. Logan, Elijah, and Owen storm over to us. “You know him?” he asks me when they stop a few feet away.

“I can explain,” I say in a rush.

“Please, for the love of god, Delaney, don’t tell me this is the guy you’ve been seeing,” Logan growls, looking just as furious as Owen.

My stomach turns as more tears fill my eyes. I bite my lip, my throat clogging with emotion. I don’t know what to say.

“He is, isn’t he!” Owen’s nostrils flair. “I’m going to fucking kill you.”

“Would you chill the hell out?” Kai barks. “Look, I know this is a lot to take in, but dial down the protective big brother bit.”

Well, this just got more awkward.

Owen laughs, but it’s not a nice one. “Oh, trust me, Mal , the things we feel for Laney are anything but brotherly.”

Kai’s brows jump, his eyes turning to mine. “What does he mean?”

“You going to tell him, Laney? You going to tell him how just a month ago, you were grinding that sweet little pussy against my cock. How you got down on your knees and swallowed me down. Or how about how Logan’s cock was buried deep inside that tight little cunt?”

“Stop,” Kai seethes, getting into Owen’s face. “You will stop it right fucking now.”

“Why? Don’t like the fact that she’s had us first? Or that she’s been with us while she’s been with you?”

“No. It’s because I don’t fucking want to hear you talk about Delaney like that. Do not try and make her feel bad.”

“She cheated on you!” Owen shouts.

“No. She didn’t. We were not together, not officially. And while I’ve known for a while that I wanted her to be mine, I was giving her time to come to terms with her feelings. Clearly, she’s been dealing with a lot. And I’m going to assume a lot of that is what she feels for the three of you. I can only imagine just how fucking hard it’s been on her. If you do not stop trying to make Delaney feel bad, I will do it for you,” Kai snarls, getting so close to Owen’s face that they're only a breath away.

“So that's it?” Logan asks. “You're done with us because you're with him now?”

“No,” my voice cracks. “I don’t know.” I start to cry, feeling so broken, so lost. “I like you all. I tried not to, but no matter what I do, I can’t get any of you out of my head! I tried to move on, and yes, with Kai, but clearly, that failed. And no, it’s not because I didn’t want to like you three; it’s because life would be so much easier if I didn’t.”

“What do we do now?” Elijah speaks up, his voice soft. When I look at him, he doesn’t look pissed, he looks sad, and it breaks my heart all over again.

“That’s up to Delaney,” Kai says, turning to me. “Whatever you want, Sweetheart, I’ll support you.”

“Even if it’s them as well as you?” I know Owen said that if I was to be with one of them, I’d have to be with all of them. I know that doesn’t extend to Kai, but if they’re willing to share with each other, would they be willing to share with one more?

Kai turns to look at the guys, his jaw ticking as he swallows hard before looking back at me. “I’m not going anywhere, Sweetheart, not unless you want me to. If that means sharing you with my cousins, then so be it. I just need you, that’s all.”

“No,” Owen growls. “I’ll share with my brothers, but not you.”

“Why the fuck not?” Kai growls. “What did I do to you? We’re fucking friends!”

“You fucked my girl!” Owen growls.

“She’s my girl, too,” Kai rumbles back.

“Enough!” I shout, stepping between the two of them. I spin towards Owen. “I like you a lot. There’s this attraction between us that's undeniable.” I turn to Elijah. “I like you too. You're so sweet, kind, and you make me feel safe, seen.” I turn to Logan. “And you.” My eyes water. “Me and you, there’s so much there left unexplored, and I want to change that. I love your son so much, I think you're an amazing dad, an amazing hard-working man.” I look at the three of them. “But none of that changes the fact that we’re family. That our parents are married. You're my stepbrothers. And while I might be fine and willing to look past that, it still doesn’t change that there is a big risk that we would be taking.”

“He’s your stepcousin,” Owen mutters. “Why is it so easy to be with him?”

“Not to mention he’s sixteen years older than you and your professor.” Logan glares at Kai.

“I don’t care about the age thing,” I confess.

“And I don’t care about the professor thing. If I lose my job, so what? I told Delaney, she’s what I want. The job is just a job.”

“Fucking hell,” Owen sighs heavily. “Well, I’m not backing away.”

“Same.” Logan crosses his arms. “I’ve already told you how I feel, Laney. I’m not losing you.”

“And what about you?” Kai asks, looking at Elijah. He stares at Kai with this look in his eyes that I can’t quite put my finger on.

He swallows thickly before turning a soft smile to me. “I’d love to have a chance to see where this could go. My feelings for you are still the same. Nothing’s changed.”

“Sweetheart.” Kai brings my attention back to him. My heart is a mess, and so is my head. “What is it that you want?”

“I want to be happy,” my voice is barely more than a whisper. “I want to be loved. I want to be needed. I don’t want to hurt anymore.”

“And what would make you happy?” Kai asks.

“You.” I swallow. “Them. But–”

“No buts. We will deal with everything as it comes. One step at a time, one day at a time. Take some time to think, to adjust. Then we can sit down and talk about everything.”

“I meant what I said, Delaney. I’ll wait until you're ready. I don’t expect you to want us all right away. Life is hard, it gets in the way. But I just want a chance,” Owen says. “And if you decide that I’m not it for you, at least give Logan and Elijah a chance.”

“What?” Logan glares at his brother.

“You need her, man. She’s everything you want. She’s amazing with Benny, she makes you happy.” He looks to Elijah. “And so do you. Don’t think we haven’t noticed your light left you a long time ago.” Owen gives his brother a pained look. “I just hope one day you can come to us, tell us what made it go. But Laney, she’s been the only thing to make it flicker back to life. And for that, I can’t thank her enough. And if you two were actually together, I know you would shine so damn bright. I just want you to be happy. You deserve it.”

Elijah dips his head, wiping at his face. I’m crying harder now, my hand over my mouth as tears spill down my cheeks.

Owen pulls me into his arms, and I cling to him tightly. I can’t push myself away anymore. I can’t let the fact that our parents are married keep us apart. I want them, maybe even need them. There’s no way these feelings are going to go away, not after hearing how much they want me. The idea of Mom being disappointed in me hurts, but I need to hope for the best.

“I want to try,” I tell him, pulling back. “With all of you. For real, this time. But there’s still so much going on. I need to take it slow. One day at a time. We need to get to know each other before diving into something so big.”

“I agree,” Kai chimes in.

“You really mean it?” Owen asks whith so much hope in his eyes.

“I do.” I nod. “If you're willing to have patience with me. And not get upset if things are more developed with one of you before the other.”

“I’m willing to wait,” Owen says.

“So am I.” Elijah gives Kai a quick look before smiling at me.

And now I’m crying again because I’m so overwhelmed.

There’s still the bullshit with Stacy, something I need to come out with to Logan. But not right now, not today. I’m too much of a fucking mess, and there’s only so much I can handle right now.

Kai pulls me into his arms and holds me tightly.

“How are you all okay with this?” I ask after I’ve calmed down. “Me being with all of you? It’s not very conventional.”

“No. But polyamory is a thing. And there’s nothing wrong with it. As long as we’re open, honest, communicate, and work together, I think it could work,” Elijah says.

“You’re all too good to me,” I sigh, leaning my head against Kai’s chest.

“Not possible.” Logan grins.

How did we get to this point? Life has changed an insane amount in the past three months. So much has happened.

But there’s a big part of me that’s eager to get this off my chest, to stop living with pain and worry.

I just want to be happy. To be able to breathe without worrying about what bad thing is going to come next.

“I think we better pick this up later,” Kai suggests. “It’s Thanksgiving, and I’m sure there are some very confused parents inside.”

“We can’t tell them.” I look at all the guys. “Not yet, at least. I just... I need some time.”

“This can stay between us.” Logan nods.

“I hate lying to my mom, but I need things between us to be stable before this comes out. So we can all be ready to deal with whatever the outcome might be.”

“Agreed,” Owen says, and his brother nods.

“What about him?” Elijah asks. “What are you going to tell your mom about him?”

“Ah, well.” I scratch the back of my head. “Mom kind of already knows about him.”

“She does?” Kai looks at me.

“I was a little overwhelmed when I found out who you were on the first day of our class. I told her about you. She didn’t seem upset, just wanted to make sure I was okay.”

“I know we can’t really be out publicly, but I’d like to at least tell my mom, maybe James?” I turn to the guys. “Would you be okay with that?”

“I’d like to show you off to the world as mine,” Logan mutters. “But clearly that would cause more harm than good. But I don’t want you to feel like you have to keep your whole life in the dark. We’re going to tell them eventually, so tell them about you two for now.”

“What he said,” Owen grumbles.

Elijah just nods, seeming more quiet about this whole development. I hope he’s not just agreeing because he thinks he has to. I’m going to have to get him alone and talk to him myself.

As we head back into the house, I feel better. Even if my head is killing me, my make-up is fucked, and there are still so many things up in the air.

“Are you okay?” Mom asks as soon as we step inside.

“Can we talk?” I ask, looking from Kai to her.

“Of course.” Mom leads us into James’ office. “What’s going on, Delaney? I’m freaking out right now.”

“I’m sorry if we scared you. It’s just seeing Kai here was a lot to take in.”

“But why? How do you two know each other?”

I chew on my lower lip as I think of how to tell her. “Remember when I told you I had a one-night stand and then later found out it was with my professor?”

“Yes,” she says slowly, her brain trying to process what I’m saying.

“Well, meet my World History professor.” I laugh awkwardly.

Mom’s eyes widen. “Oh.” She blinks. “Ohhh.” She looks between the two of us. “I’m going to assume that you didn’t stop seeing him like you said you were going to.”

“No,” I sigh. “I tried. Trust me, I did,” I mutter, shooting a look at Kai, who is grinning at me like he has no shame. “He wouldn’t let me.”

“Oh really?” Mom looks amused. “And why not?”

“Because a man cannot simply walk away from someone like your daughter,” Kai explains. “I’d be crazy not to fight for just a chance to make her mine. She’s perfect for me, and I’d like to be the man for her.”

“But your job.” Mom frowns. “How would that work?”

“We would be keeping it between the two of us,” Kai says. “And when the semester is over, I’d let the dean know that we’ve started dating. There are no rules against professors and students having a relationship. Only if the student is in their class.”

“She is in your class.” Mom looks to me. “Are you dropping out?”

“No,” Kai answers with a slight growl, and Mom raises an amused brow at him.

“Another thing he won't let me do,” I sigh.

“And before you get the idea, no, I do not plan on being controlling towards Delaney,” he states. “If there ever was something she truly didn’t want, I’d never force her.”

“Good.” Mom nods, and I smile up at Kai. This is going a lot better than I thought. Maybe this could work. “But again, what about your job?”

“This is just a job to me. If I lose it, it won’t be the end for me. My true passion is photography. I’ll always have that to fall back on.”

“You really do care about my daughter, don’t you?” Mom smiles, and God, I love this woman.

“Very much so. She’s quickly become my everything.”

“Kai.” My eyes widen, tearing up. I’ve cried so damn much already. His words heal little rips in my heart that I didn’t even know were there.

“Well, if this is what you want, Delaney, then I’ll support you,” Mom tells me, then glares at Kai. “And don’t think just because you’re family, I won’t kick your ass if you hurt my baby girl.”

“I wouldn’t expect anything else.” Kai chuckles.

“The step thing doesn’t bother you?” I ask Mom, knowing the risks of bringing that up.

Mom shakes her head. “You’re both adults, and there’s no blood relationship. It’s not like he’s your stepbrother.” Mom laughs. And there goes my heart, sinking into the deep depths of the ocean. One thing at a time, Delaney.

Kai gives me a smile, knowing just how much her words hit me.

“Do you think James will be mad?” The idea of making James upset with me hurts almost as much as my mom. He’s the closest thing I’ve had to a dad, and I don’t want to lose him.

“No. Not mad,” James interjects, stepping into his office. “But I agree with my wife. Hurt my daughter, and I’ll kick your ass.”

That’s the first time he called me his daughter, and I lose it, throwing myself at him. James hugs me tightly. “Thank you.” I cry into his chest.

It might seem like I’m overreacting, but I hope they all understand just how big this is for me. How much it means to me.

I can tell my mom does when I pull back to see happy tears in her eyes. “Come here.” James pulls Mom into our hug. “My girls.”

When we’re done, we join the others in the dining room. I immediately smother Benny’s face in kisses as he giggles.

Kai takes his seat next to his mom and smiles. Poor Teresa looks so confused. “By the way, have you met my girlfriend?”

Teresa’s brows jump as she looks at me and then back to him. “You're going to tell me everything after this supper,” she scolds.

“I will.” Kai chuckles. He doesn’t seem worried, and she doesn’t seem upset.

Sitting down, we finally start to eat, and as things drift off into friendly conversation, I feel like a big weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

I’m not sure how long this will last or what life is going to throw at me, but I need to take this as a win. To enjoy it while I can.

“Anyone want to tell us what the hell just happened?” Justin asks.

“I think she forgot we were here,” Winter pouts.

My eyes widen as I gape at them. And then I burst out into hysterical laughter. “I’m so sorry.” I do feel bad, but I didn’t get a chance to see them before everything spiraled.

“I feel the love,” Winter sighs.

“You owe us the tea.” Justin narrows his eyes.

“Later, man,” Logan tells him. “For now, we eat.”