18. Ryan
What a complete disaster. Having Maddox around was throwing me so far off balance, I wasn't sure I even knew how to walk straight anymore. Everything was confusing. I didn't know what he wanted or expected from me. He kissed me, he told me that it had always been the two of us. And he and Quinn had both made it abundantly clear at lunch today how they felt about Yates.
But I didn't know what to do with all these feelings or information because the truth was it didn't change anything. I still had to save this ranch. I closed my eyes for a second, feeling the gentle sway of Storm's walk and taking a deep breath, letting the humid air center me. I opened my eyes again and steered Storm toward the pasture we'd been working in earlier today, the hay half gathered.
I didn't know if Maddox would be coming back with Quinn, and if he was, I didn't know what I'd say to him. I got my answer a couple of minutes later when Quinn rode up on Daisy by himself. He tilted the brim of his cowboy hat at me with a sly smile as he rode up beside me. "You okay?" he asked, sliding off of Daisy and tying her rein to the wooden fence post in front of us.
Following his lead, I did the same with Storm before sighing heavily. "I honestly don't know, Quinny. What was that in there?"
He shrugged. "Yates is a tool and doesn't deserve you. Maddox and I wanted to make sure that message got across."
Quinn met my questioning gaze with a crooked smile, and I felt my own smile tug at the corner of my mouth. "I can't deny that it was a little bit fun to watch you two make him squirm."
Quinn laughed and patted me on the shoulder. "I had a feeling you'd enjoy that."
I groaned. "How am I going to stay married to him for an entire year ? The more time I spend around him, the more I realize we have nothing in common and come from two different worlds."
"One look at him and I could have told you that," he pointed out. "Besides, what about Maddox?"
"What about him?" I asked, knowing I sounded defensive but not caring one bit.
"He likes you. Maybe even loves you."
I scoffed, turning to walk toward where we were working earlier, and Quinn followed, falling into step beside me. "He left Quinny. He's back now, and maybe it's the nostalgia, but he hasn't exactly asked me not to marry Yates. I'm just his fun new toy," I argued.
Beside me, Quinn stopped walking, gripping my elbow and spinning me, so I faced him. He cocked his head at me while he stared as if he were trying to figure me out. "What's wrong with you?"
"Nothing." I tried to yank my arm out of his grip, but he held on tight, refusing to let me walk away before facing whatever he thought I needed to. This was one of the things I both loved and hated most about my best friend.
"Nuh-uh. That's not gonna work on me, sweetie," Quinn said, using a finger to tilt my chin up, so I had to look him in the eye. "Tell me what's going on with you."
It was a demand, and we both knew it. Sighing heavily, my shoulders sagged. "I don't know. He confuses me because I thought I had everything figured out. I was going to do this whole thing with Yates, and our problems were going to be over. It wasn't exactly clean, but it seemed simple enough. Then Maddox fucking Everleigh comes strolling back into my life, and he actually apologizes. And he's the same and at the same time so different. He kisses like a hurricane, Quinny. He sucks me up and consumes me, scattering little bits of me all over the place because I can't tell which direction is up. And now I'm so confused because it feels like maybe I have something to lose that I didn't have before," I ranted.
Quinn had let me go, and I started to pace in front of him, really getting on a roll as words poured out of my mouth faster than I could think about what I was saying.
"When I was a kid, I always imagined it'd be him and me riding off into the sunset, you know? I know it's cheesy, but it was what I wanted. I didn't even care what happened or where we were as long as we were together. He was my first best friend, my first protector outside of my dad, my first kiss, and my first love. When he left, it broke a part of me that I didn't think would ever heal. And then he came back, and those broken pieces started to sew themselves back together. When he apologized, I had no idea how much I needed that. And then he just shows up. Every day he's here, and he's putting in the effort to get to know me now. But not only me, you, too. He wants to know the people in my life, and I don't know what to do with all of this."
Quinn stepped in front of me and gripped my upper arms, a soft smile playing on his lips. "Take a deep breath, sweetie."
I did as he said and inhaled the thick afternoon air, blowing out slowly. "Look, from what I've seen, the guy can have anything and everything he wants. But the one thing he's never allowed himself to have is you. Now he's trying to make up for everything he fucked up in the first place. If I had to guess, I'd say he wants you to give him a chance," Quinn said.
"I don't know if I can. Giving him a chance means giving up on this place." I waved my hand around at the land that surrounded us.
"A place you don't even really want to be."
I hated when he was right, but that didn't change how I felt. "Doesn't matter, Quinny. Whether I want to be here or not, marrying Yates solves both problems. And if Maddox really wants me, he'll be willing to wait while I do this." My tone was final, and I was done talking about this. My stomach sank as I thought about whether Maddox would still be here in a year willing to give us a chance.
A lot of things could change in a year, and with a life like his where he'd no doubt be surrounded by adoring fans who'd give him whatever he wanted, I wasn't sure I stood a chance. Why would he ever want to stay here waiting for me?
Don't get me wrong - I knew I was a damn catch. But I was also realistic. I nudged Quinn's shoulder with mine. "C'mon, Quinny. Let's finish this pasture."
"Only if you promise to swim in the pond with me after," he countered, his eyes glinting with something I wasn't sure I liked the look of.
I sighed because he knew I needed his help today. "Fine."
"No backing out."
"I know," I snapped, completely over this conversation. "Now, get to work." I didn't know what he was up to, but I was pretty sure I wasn't going to like it.
By the time we finished way too many hours later, I was drenched in sweat, covered in dirt, and bits of hay were in places I didn't want to think too hard about. My muscles ached, and I didn't know if I'd ever been more thirsty. I wouldn't admit it, but that swim with Quinn sounded like the perfect end to this day.
I followed his lead, riding over to the shady area near the pond that I liked to go to when I needed a break or some time to myself. We stopped to let the horses drink from the pond before we tied them loosely to the trees. Quinn and I had gone swimming here probably hundreds of times, and even Maddox had swum here with me tons when we were kids. This was my favorite place on the entire property.
I watched as Quinn pulled his t-shirt over his head, admiring his toned body even if I wasn't actually attracted to him. I could still appreciate the view. He caught me staring and chuckled with a wink. "Glad at least one of us gets to enjoy the show," he teased.
I pulled my tank top over my head and tossed it at him playfully. "Just because you're gay doesn't mean I can't look."
"Oh, trust me, sweetie. I don't mind the attention," he assured before undoing the button on his jeans and sliding them and his boxer briefs down his legs. I did the same, and as we stood there, me in my underwear and Quinn completely naked, I grinned at my best friend before we both took off for the water at the same time, splashing into the warm pond.
I dove in, tucking my head so that the water would cover my body completely. I immediately relaxed as I felt the day wash away with every brush of the water surrounding me. When I surfaced, I sucked in a lungful of air and relished the water's feeling dripping down my skin. I slicked back my hair and turned at the sound of approaching hooves. Quinn surfaced next to me, and his gaze drifted to where I was watching Maddox ride up to the pond.
Any confusion I'd been feeling about him was quickly put to rest by the sudden racing of my pulse and the flutter in my stomach as he approached and hopped down off the black stallion he'd rode out here. The horse fit him like they'd been made to be together. He was no white knight riding in to save the day. He wore his darkness like armor he spent a lifetime earning, which made him that much more appealing.
"Damn," Quinn breathed next to me, and I just bit down on my lip to keep the stupid grin that wanted to escape in. I didn't want Maddox to know how much he affected me. That didn't mean I kept my eyes from wandering up and down every inch of his body, from his messy brown hair, down every peak and valley of his muscular torso. He was currently covered in black from head to toe, down to his heavy black boots with the laces untied.
He smirked as he caught me checking him out and I grinned right back. I didn't care to hide my interest, even if I didn't know what to do with it. I may be inexperienced, but that didn't mean I was shy. Maddox Everleigh had always been the sexiest guy I'd ever seen, and I didn't see that changing anytime soon.
"Mind if I join you guys?" he drawled, still wearing that hot as hell smirk on his face and reaching back to yank his shirt over his head, knowing neither Quinn nor I planned to say no. As his clothes hit the ground, I saw Quinn's jaw drop next to me, and I couldn't help the giggle that bubbled up and escaped my lips. I pulled my hand out of the water and used my index finger to push up on Quinn's jaw.
"I think you've got a little drool right there," I teased, wiping my hand across his chin. I looked back at Maddox, but his eyes were locked on mine and filled with heat. They were so dark they almost looked black, and as I watched him wade into the water, I was suddenly very aware of the fact I was wearing only a bra and panties.
When he dove under the water, swimming in our direction, Quinn finally tore his gaze off him, and his face broke into a boyish grin. "Like the view?" I asked.
"Fuck, yes. That man is sin personified, and I love every second I get to stare at him," Quinn said wistfully, splashing into the water to float on his back. I followed his lead, floating on the surface of the water, the sound around me muffled as I stared up at the cloudless blue sky before letting my eyes drift closed.
The waves around me gently lapped at my arms and legs as for a few minutes, I was weightless. I let my mind empty of everything before I felt arms wrap around my waist and pull me down into the water. I plugged my nose just before I was pulled under, submerged in the dark water, and held down with a pair of strong arms wrapped around me before he let me go, and I floated back to the surface.
When he popped up a second behind me and flung his wet hair out of his face, my breath caught at the dark beauty of this man. The way the sun glistened off of his wet, tan skin and the way his eyes were dark with intent. He didn't try to hide the desire in his gaze. Oh, no. Instead, his tongue played in the corner of his lips before a sinful smile crept across his face, telling me everything he wanted with just one look.
This was a man who wanted me just as much as I wanted him. Maybe more.
I tore my eyes away from his, shaking my head and trying to remind myself that I was engaged, even if it was bullshit. Maddox didn't know it wasn't real. To him, I was in love with Yates and tying my life to his. I had really and truly created a mess of epic proportions without even trying.
Moving to swim away and put a little distance between us, Maddox moved with me, grabbing my hand and pulling me back so he could wrap his hand around my waist. His thumb stroked the bare skin above my hip, and a shudder rolled through my body involuntarily at his touch. I wanted to wrap my legs around his waist, but that felt like an invitation to me, one I wasn't ready to extend.
It wasn't that I didn't want Maddox. It was the opposite. I spent my entire life wanting this man to be mine. To come home and claim me, tell me he wanted me as much as I wanted him. But the hurt was still there from what he did. I could tell he was trying to make up for it, and every day he came back and stuck around, showing me that he really had meant his apology, made me trust him a little bit more. But I needed time to figure out what to do with Yates and to be sure I wasn't just some fleeting challenge for Maddox.
"Hey, man. Glad you could make it," Quinn greeted him with a smug smile as he watched the two of us.
I rolled my eyes. "So, that was how he knew we'd be swimming."
Maddox chuckled darkly. "Quinn and I had a discussion after lunch. When he made the suggestion to your fiance, I thought it sounded like a fun walk down memory lane. Remember when we used to do this as kids?"
Nodding my head, I wrapped my arms around his neck so I could stop treading water with them, but I kept my legs firmly pointed toward the bottom, not giving into temptation. "Remember the rope swing?" I wondered.
Maddox lit up and moved his head from side to side, trying to find it. "Yeah, where'd it go?" he asked, adjusting his hold on my hips as he twisted his body back and forth.
Reluctantly pulling my hand off of him, I pointed at Quinn. "This guy thought it could take his very grown-up and muscular weight, and it snapped right off the branch mid-swing."
Quinn shrugged. "I had to test its limits. You never know unless you try, right?" He glanced at Maddox with an unreadable expression on his face.
Maddox smiled knowingly and nodded. "Right. Maybe we'll have to rebuild it."
My eyes lit up. "Can we?"
Maddox turned his attention back to me, his eyes locking on mine as they searched deep into my soul like only he could. I wasn't sure what he was looking for, but I didn't want him to ever look away. "I'll build you anything you want, Freckles." He seemed totally serious, as if he meant more when he said it, and then he leaned in and placed a gentle kiss right on the tip of my nose.
I couldn't help the sigh that escaped my lips, but he didn't seem to mind. If anything, he held me closer to his body and his warm, smooth skin pressed against mine as he closed whatever distance was left between us.
"Okay, I'm starting to feel like a third wheel," Quinn complained. That broke the spell, and I put a little distance between Maddox and me. He seemed reluctant to let me move even a little but did it anyway.
"What do you want to do, Quinny?" I asked.
He grinned at me wickedly. I cringed because I knew whatever he was about to say would probably be something that would embarrass me. My awareness was brought to the fact that Maddox's hands were still holding me close to him but moving up before they stopped just underneath my bra. His thumbs stroked the skin just below my breasts, and electric tension flared between us.
Quinn's deep voice brought my attention back to him. "Truth or dare?"
I groaned, and Maddox let out a low chuckle. "Well played, Quinn," he grinned.
"I thought so."
Men.
Letting go of Maddox completely, I swam between the two of them, so we formed a triangle in the middle of the pond, all of us treading water. They'd roped me into this, and I honestly didn't know what to pick. If I chose truth, Quinn would undoubtedly ask me something embarrassing either about Maddox or about my pathetic love life up to this point. I wasn't sure I wanted Maddox to see how desperately I clung to the idea of my happily ever after being with him.
At the same time, if I picked dare, Quinn would find some way to embarrass me in front of the one guy I actually cared about what he thought of me. Ugh. "Dare," I decided, saying it out loud before I could chicken out.
Quinn was practically vibrating with excitement, and I knew I'd made a mistake. "I dare you to strip off whatever you still have left on and skinny dip."
I snuck a peek at Maddox, who was staring at me with what could only be described as pure lust. His eyes looked practically black in the shadows created with the sun at his back. Just that look made my thighs clench together as heat spiraled to my core.
In his gaze, I saw everything he wanted to do to me--every swirl of his tongue, every clench of my body, every spark of electricity and connection between us. I wanted it all, and we both knew it. But I couldn't go there. Not right now.
Damn Quinn and his dares. Taking off the last layers I wore would remove every last protection I had against Maddox. If I was naked and he pressed up against me, I wasn't sure I had the will to deny us both what we so clearly wanted.
But a dare's a dare. So, I tossed one last evil eye at Quinn before swimming toward shore. I stayed deep enough in the water that if I crouched down, I wouldn't expose myself to the guys, but I could still toss my clothes up on the shore so they wouldn't sink to the bottom of the pond. With my back facing them, I unhooked my bra before sliding the straps off my arms and tossing it to the shore. I looked back over my shoulder at Maddox, and I swore he'd moved closer.
Turning back toward the shore, I slid my thong down my legs and tossed the soaking fabric onto the sand beside my bra. I had a feeling it'd still be soaking even if we weren't swimming right now after being so close to Maddox.
The warm water caressed my newly exposed skin, and I turned back to face the guys. "Done. Now it's my turn." I swam out a little further until the water came up to just below my shoulders and faced Maddox, who was staring down into the water right at my breasts. I sucked in a breath, trying to act like I didn't care. In reality, his gaze felt like a warm caress, exactly where I wished his hands were.
"Maddox. Truth or dare?" I challenged.
I didn't think it was possible, but his eyes darkened even further. "Truth."
Swallowing hard, a million questions ran through my mind. There was so much I wanted to know, how could I possibly settle in on just one? But this was my chance to find out where we stood. More than anything in our past, this was what I needed to know most. "What do you want from me?" I asked, the words coming out louder than I'd intended because I was afraid if I didn't get them out, I wouldn't be able to.
A frown creased his brow as he watched me. "Isn't it obvious?" he answered my question with one of his own as he swam toward me. He stopped right in front of me, so he was looking down into my eyes, the intensity of his burning almost like fire. As he found his footing, he reached out and ran his fingertips down the side of my face, and I leaned into his touch but didn't break eye contact. "Everything," he whispered.
My heart clenched as my chest flooded with warmth. The way he was looking at me left no doubt as to his meaning. He wanted me. He wanted more. But could I believe he wouldn't walk away again when things got tough?
And even if I did, what would I do about the ranch? About Yates and the contract I signed?
My thoughts were obliterated when he lowered his mouth to mine. My hands moved on their own to glide up his chest and to the back of his neck, pulling him closer. I melted into him as he dotted my jaw with soft kisses. His lips covered mine again, and we devoured each other, both of us starved for the other. I didn't know what would happen in the future, but right now, I didn't care. Everything around us disappeared into nothingness as we got lost in each other.
A flood of heat rushed through my body as Maddox pressed himself against me, his hips pressing into mine. I felt the thick ridge of his growing erection press against me, and I moaned softly in the back of my throat, which just made him press closer.
Quinn clearing his throat behind us finally had me yanking my mouth away from Maddox, and I sucked in air. I didn't think I breathed for the entirety of that kiss, and my knees were weak and shaky.
"Goddamn," Maddox cursed under his breath, and I had to agree. Every time we kissed, it got better and better.
"As much fun as it is to watch you two suck face, we've got a game to finish," Quinn grumbled.
Maddox ran a hand up to his face and through his hair before focusing back on Quinn. "Truth or dare, Quinny?"
I didn't miss how he'd used my nickname for Quinn, and it gave me the warm fuzzies when Quinn didn't correct him. Instead, he flashed him a devilish smile. "Dare."
"You're feeling left out? I dare you to come kiss me," he said, and my eyebrows shot up in surprise. Maddox wore a smirk, and his eyes challenged Quinn. Maddox held up his finger. "One time only," he clarified.
Quinn practically dove for Maddox, and I giggled. "You just made his entire life," I told him, moving aside as Quinn stepped right in front of him. If Maddox thought Quinn was the type of guy who was shy and wouldn't take exactly what he wanted, he was in for quite the surprise.
Quinn gently placed his hands on both sides of Maddox's face and leaned in, kissing him once gently, and I was surprised when Maddox closed his eyes and leaned in, their lips connecting again. This time, Quinn deepened the kiss, and I watched basically the hottest thing I'd ever seen happen right in front of me. Both of their hands stayed above the shoulders, and the kiss was surprisingly gentle and over much too quickly. I could have watched them kiss all night long.
When Quinn pulled away, I watched his cheeks turn pink, and Maddox stepped back once and winked at me before he said, "Don't make it weird."
Quinn giggled, and I had to laugh with him. I'd only heard him giggle a couple of times, and it always made me laugh because he wasn't the giggling type. He was this big macho cowboy-type of guy, so when he lost it, I did, too. Finally, Maddox joined in, and all the tension that could have been there was just gone as we all cracked up.
I drifted backwards to float on my back again with a soft smile on my face, and I felt Maddox take my hand, weaving our fingers together. He tugged me upright and leaned in to whisper in my ear. "You know I did that for you, right? Did you enjoy the show?"
I bit my lip. "It was hot as hell."
He nodded once. "Burn it into your memory because it's not happening again. I may be comfortable with my sexuality, but I don't usually swing that way. Besides, I only want one person on this entire planet, and she's standing here in my arms." He snaked his arms around my waist and pulled me against his chest, but I didn't fight him.
Once Quinn had gathered himself, he came back over to us. "Last round. Maddox, truth or dare?"
Maddox sighed, resigned. "Last round." He moved his hand down until it rested on the curve right above my ass. If he inched it just a tiny bit lower, he'd be able to grab me, and I shimmied a little because I couldn't help myself, I wanted him to grab me and pull me against him. He chuckled darkly against my ear and lowered his hand, squeezing me once before moving it back up. "Dare."
"Strip off the rest of your clothes and go skinny dipping," Quinn dared.
"Not very original," Maddox said with a smirk before letting me go and wading toward the shore. Instead of staying in the water like I had, he waited until he was on the shoreline before stripping off his black boxer briefs. He turned back around before striking a pose and gave Quinn and me both an eyeful before he waded back into the water.
I didn't even try to hide the fact my eyes roamed every part of his body, and he did not disappoint. If anything, his muscular torso that led down to a delicious vee at his hips that pointed directly at his very big and semi-hard cock was better than I'd fantasized about. Real-life Maddox was temptation incarnate. I suddenly found myself fighting off a deep, intense craving to get up close and personal with every last part of the crazy hot man making his way toward me.
My cheeks heated up. I wasn't sure what to do with myself now that we were both naked. The look in his eye told me he had some ideas. As if on cue, Quinn cleared his throat. "Well, I think I'll head back and start dinner. You're staying the night, right, Mad?"
Maddox's smirk grew into a grin as he nodded. My head whipped around to Quinn, and I tried to catch his eye, but he was doing a great job of avoiding me. Instead, he swam toward the shore and climbed out completely naked. I'd seen Quinn naked so many times it didn't phase me at this point, but he was the only man I'd ever seen that way until today.
I was totally out of my depth, and now Quinn was leaving. I moved water with my arms while I balanced on the sandy lake bottom on my tiptoes with my eyes locked on Maddox. I was waiting to see what he was going to do.
A few seconds later, I got my answer when he stopped right in front of me and ran his fingertips down my arm before sliding his palm against my lower back and pulling me closer. "Looks like we're about to be all alone out here," he whispered against the shell of my ear, and I shivered under his touch.
"Looks like it," I managed to say, though I was surprised I even got that out. We were both breathing heavily, our chests pressing closer together with every breath. Just as I heard Quinn riding off on Daisy, Maddox lowered his mouth to my neck, sucking my skin gently. My head fell back as I closed my eyes, and he took advantage of it, nipping and kissing along my neck until he got up to my jaw.
He leaned back, his dark eyes looking back and forth between mine, the silent question in them. I closed my eyes slowly, letting him know I wanted this, and his warm lips covered mine. This kiss wasn't frantic, but it was consuming all the same. He was sweet, kissing me lazily, taking his time as if he had nowhere he'd rather be. His hand pressed harder into my lower back as his other hand slid up to my hair, where he gathered it into his fingers, tangling them in the wild mess of my curls.
I had no idea how much time had passed. All I knew was that my toes were curled into the lake's sandy bottom, and my body ached for him to be closer. No matter how close we pressed together, it wasn't close enough. His hard-on pressed into me, sliding against the slick skin of my hips and belly, and I moaned, letting my hand wander down his chest and lower until I'd explored every defined ridge of his abs.
I didn't let my hand drop below his abs, though. If I did, I knew I wouldn't be able to stop myself from taking this further, and there were no clothes between us to get in the way.
Maddox pulled back slightly, whispering against my lips, "Truth or dare?"
My lips curled into a smile against his as I kissed him again. "Truth."
He leaned even further back so that he could properly look into my eyes. He studied me for a long time before he sighed and asked me what he obviously had been wanting to know. "What's going on with you and this Yates guy?"
My whole body stiffened, and he tried to pull me closer, but I resisted. It wasn't that I didn't want to be in his arms. The opposite, actually. That was the only place I ever wanted to be. But not like this. Not when I was technically engaged to someone else, even if that person was a stranger. Not when I was lying to the man standing in front of me, doing his best to make up for all of his past mistakes.
God, I was a horrible person.
The worst part was I couldn't come clean and tell him the truth even if I wanted to. Maddox wasn't the kind of guy to take the deal Yates had cornered me into without doing something about it. He already hated my fake fiance. What would he do to him when he found out he'd taken advantage of the fact I was desperate and needed help?
And yeah, I was starting to see this whole deal for what it really was - Yates taking advantage of me. But I wasn't without blame, and I made my bed. Now it was time to lie in it. Besides, I still needed Yates's help to save this place, even if I had a feeling I didn't have even close to the whole picture as to why he wanted to marry me in the first place.
Did it really matter, though? I'd agreed, and now I was stuck.
"What do you mean? We're getting married." I thought I'd try to act like everything was fine.
Maddox let me go and growled in frustration as his eyes stayed locked on mine. I watched as he worked the muscles in his jaw, clenching them tightly while his eyes searched mine. "You know that's not what I meant. You're not stupid, so don't act like you are," he snapped. "I mean this. Right here." He waved his arm at me. "You're kissing me, and we're both naked. I can tell you want more from me, and you sure as fuck know I want more from you."
"We're naked because of truth or dare," I weakly pointed out.
He narrowed his eyes. "That's bullshit, and you know it. You could have said no. You could have left with Quinn. You could have slapped me across the face when I tried to kiss you. But you didn't. To any of it."
He moved closer to me again, his intense gaze bored into me. "Want to know what I think? I think you don't love him. You don't even like him. So, why are you doing this, Freckles? What does he have on you?" His fingers ran up and down my spine. I shivered as he left goosebumps in the wake of his touch.
Maddox leaned closer, close enough that I could kiss him if I just tilted my head up a tiny bit. "Look at how your body responds to my touch," he murmured, gently running his fingertips across my heated skin. "I know you don't want him. You've only ever wanted me, and we both know it. So, tell me why you're really marrying him and let me help you."
His voice was hypnotic to me, and I was putty in his hands again. I didn't think a time would come where I wouldn't be weak for this man. I'd spent my entire life wanting him, and he was serving himself up to me on a silver platter, and there was nothing I could do about it.
Maddox was the worst kind of torture.
"I can't," I whispered, and he shifted back to look at me again.
"Can't or won't?"
"Can't," I said, and he sighed, letting me go and putting some distance between us.
"Fuck. I don't know what to do here, Freckles. I can tell you don't want to do this. The expression on your face whenever he's around. The way your body responds to me and not him. It paints a picture I don't like, and I can't help feeling like there's a whole lot more going on here. I know I left, but I'm back now, and I'm sure as fuck not going anywhere. Maybe eventually you'll trust me enough to let me in," he said, his shoulders tense as he turned and made his way back to the shore.
"Where are you going?" I called after him as fear clawed up my throat, and my heart started to race. Was he going to leave? Would I ever see him again?
"Home. I need some time to think," he called out as he waded out of the water completely naked, bending to pick up his clothes and pulling them on before climbing up on his black stallion. He never even looked back at me.
As I watched him ride away, I couldn't help but wonder if I was making a huge mistake by not just coming clean and telling him the truth about what's going on. But if I broke the NDA and Yates found out, and I had to assume he would, there'd be no way I could handle the financial consequences of that, let alone save the farm.
Making my way to the shore, I watched Maddox on the horizon until he was only a tiny dot. I wanted to cling to every second I could and hoped that wasn't the last time I'd ever see him.