30. Sutton

30

SUTTON

Nerves bubbled in my belly as I walked up the front steps to Cope’s house. The anxiety had been my ever-present companion throughout the day, just like the hum beneath my skin. It was as if my body was reliving the feeling of Cope’s hands on me, his mouth, his— nope, nope, nope.

I needed to get ahold of myself. This was ridiculous. Cope was just a man. A man who gave you the best orgasms of your life. I shoved that thought down as I punched in the lock code on the front door.

Steeling myself, I opened it and stepped inside. I didn’t hear anything at first, and then there was a shriek. Not one of terror but one of joy. I moved through the house and toward the sounds of laughter coming from the backyard.

As the rear windows came into view, all my nerves melted away. I wasn’t worried about whether sleeping with Cope was a horrible mistake or if he would break my heart far worse than Roman ever had. All I could think about was how happy my kid looked.

Luca let out a peal of laughter as Cope threw him into the air. He hit the water with a massive splash, and Cope grinned. I slid open the back door just as Luca’s head broke the water’s surface. He shook out his hair like a dog would shake water out of its fur.

“That was…AWESOME!” Luca shouted.

Cope turned at the sound of the door closing behind me, his glistening golden skin on display. “She’s home. Finally.”

“Yeah, we’ve been waiting forever ,” Luca complained.

A hint of guilt stabbed at me. I had stayed later than usual today, and I wasn’t finished.

A cake still needed frosting, so I’d have to go back after dinner to finish it. Or maybe after I put Luca down.

“What’s with the frown, Warrior?” Cope asked.

I shook my head as I toed off my sneakers and sank my feet into the lush grass near the pool. “Just a long day. And I have to go back after dinner to finish up a cake.”

“Aw, man,” Luca complained.

“Sorry, kiddo,” I said, guilt digging in deeper.

“That just means you and I get a boys’ night.” Cope grinned at Luca.

“Thea said she could babysit,” I said quickly. “You don’t have to?—”

Cope shot me a look that had me snapping my mouth closed. As Luca chattered on about what a boys’ night included, Cope climbed the pool steps and walked toward me. His swim trunks hung low on his hips, revealing too many abs to count and a trail of hair that disappeared into his shorts. I nearly swallowed my tongue.

He moved into my space, his hand dipping under my hair. “I really want to kiss that worried look off your face right now.”

“Cope…”

His eyes searched mine as his fingers squeezed the back of my neck. “I know you’re probably not ready for that. Not in front of Luca. But know I want it.”

A burn lit behind my eyes, and I suddenly recognized the true fear behind my anxiety. I’d been afraid Cope wouldn’t want more than one night. That he’d stolen my heart but hadn’t given me his in return. “Okay,” I whispered .

Cope moved in a flash, scooping me into his arms bridal-style. “Now, I think it’s time for a little afternoon swim.”

“Copeland Colson, don’t you dare!” I shrieked.

But it was too late. Cope was already running toward the pool’s edge. He jumped with me in his arms, sending us both crashing into the water. I spluttered and coughed as we broke the surface. Cope laughed as Luca hooted.

“You’re both grounded!” I shouted.

They just laughed harder. But the truth was, it was exactly what I needed. We swam and played until my energy wore out, and I moved to the edge of the pool, hoisting myself out and hoping my shorts and tee would dry a bit before I headed inside.

Cope moved to the edge with me, pushing out of the water with ease. We sat there, watching Luca demonstrate his dives and cannonballs, and Cope laid his hand over mine. He didn’t link our fingers but still gave us that point of contact.

The move made my chest ache. It respected my wishes but still gave me a taste of affection. I turned to look at him and took in all that sun-kissed beauty. “I hope you guys wore sunscreen.”

Cope’s lips twitched, his scar looking more pronounced. “My mom taught me well. I used the spray kind and made Luca rotate like a rotisserie chicken.”

The mental image had me fighting a grin. “Thanks for giving him a great day.”

Luca yelled, “Cannonball!” and hit the water with a splash as if to punctuate the statement. My stomach churned, a million worries setting in. Luca was getting used to this life. To Cope. And none of it was permanent.

“Where’s Luca’s dad?” Cope asked softly.

I stiffened, the urge to bite Cope’s head off strong. But the truth was, it was a miracle this was the first time Cope had asked about it. My throat worked as I swallowed. “Probably back in Baltimore. He’s not in the picture anymore.”

Cope was quiet, but I felt his eyes on me, his gaze probing. “Can’t imagine being willing to give up a relationship with that kid. ”

The burn behind my eyes was back, and there was pressure along with it now. Wasn’t this always what I’d wanted? What I’d wished for? Someone who saw Luca for the amazing tiny human he was? So, why did it feel so terrifying?

“He doesn’t talk about him. His dad,” Cope pressed.

“No.” Because he didn’t. After I’d healed from my so-called car accident and we left Baltimore, the only thing Luca had said was, “ Dad’s not coming, right? ” God, that had shattered my heart. Because even though Roman had never hurt Luca or me, he’d disappointed us over and over again. He’d broken promise after promise. Had stolen from us both.

“Did he hurt you?” Cope’s voice was a low growl now, so contrary to Luca’s cheerful shouts in the background.

“No,” I whispered. “Not like that. But he’s not healthy enough to be in Luca’s life. The courts agreed.”

I felt a little of the tension bleed out of Cope. “Losing the two of you should’ve been a wake-up call to get healthy.”

It should’ve. But it never was. And some tiny part of me would always wonder if it was because I wasn’t enough.

Cope grabbed my hand, tugging me toward him as I headed for the front door. I hit his chest with an oomph , sending him a chastising look. “I have to go. And Luca will riot if you aren’t down to watch that game in about sixty seconds.”

Cope gave me a full-on pout. “You work too hard.”

I couldn’t help the way my muscles stiffened. “I’m building a business.”

“Yes, and you were there by four this morning. Working this late on top of it isn’t healthy. You’re pushing too hard.”

I shoved away from Cope’s chest. “I’m working this hard because standing on my own two feet is important to me.” And after the pieces of my past I’d shared with him today, Cope should understand that.

He scrubbed a hand over his face. “Okay. I get it. I just…I worry about you. These are long hours, and I don’t want you getting sick.”

I softened at the genuine worry in his tone and moved back into his space. “I just have the frosting left. It should only take me an hour or two tops. Then, I’ll be home and?—”

“Coming to bed with me,” Cope said, a growl lacing his tone.

I couldn’t help the smile that stretched across my face. “That depends. Do you promise not to throw me into the pool again?” My hair was still damp from my after-swim shower.

His wolfish grin was back. “That’s a promise I can’t make. You look too good in a wet T-shirt.”

I smacked Cope’s chest. “You’re hopeless.”

“I’m honest,” Cope said, pulling me against him. “Text me when you get there and when you leave?”

He’d taken to requesting these check-ins, even in the early morning hours. Said he liked waking to the knowledge I was safe. Something about that grabbed the organ in my chest and wouldn’t let go. “You could implant a homing beacon in my arm.”

Cope smiled against my mouth. “Don’t tempt me.”

I gave him a lazy kiss, one that easily could’ve turned into more, but I pulled back, cutting it short. “I need to go.”

Cope didn’t release me.

“The sooner I leave, the sooner I’ll be back.”

Cope let go then. “I might be motivated to dole out rewards if it’s less than two hours.”

I chuckled. “Bribery?”

“I never said I was noble.”

No, he hadn’t. “You’re way better than noble, Cope. You’re the best man I’ve ever known.”

A look of surprise morphed into something that resembled pain, but Cope quickly masked it. “Text me when you get there.”

I frowned but nodded. “Okay.”

I headed out the front door and down the steps toward my SUV, but I felt Cope’s eyes on me as I went. His stare felt different than any other I’d experienced. There was a warm strength to it. A sensation that somehow managed to ground and heat all at once.

As I beeped the locks and slid behind the wheel, I glanced up at the entryway to Cope’s house. There he stood, hands in the pockets of a pair of joggers that hugged his hips perfectly. But there was something in his dark-blue eyes in that moment. I swore it was sadness. It could’ve been a memory of Teddy surfacing perhaps. But something told me it wasn’t.

I stared back for a long moment before forcing myself to start the engine and head into town. Darkness was just starting to coat the landscape in a breathtaking deep purple. I didn’t mind the drive, not when I got to take in this sort of beauty. But I did miss popping downstairs to the bakery to frost in my pajamas. Or hopping up to the roof to tend to my bees in just a bathrobe.

That thought reminded me that it was time to harvest honeycombs from another one of the hives. Cope had said he wanted to learn how. I added it to my mental to-do list as I pulled into a spot behind the bakery. As far as I could tell, Rick hadn’t had much luck renting the apartment upstairs. I couldn’t help the tiny flicker of satisfaction I felt at that. Sometimes, karma came through.

I grabbed my keys and purse and headed for the back door. It only took me a matter of seconds to get inside and lock up behind myself. I shot off a quick text to Cope, letting him know I’d made it, and flicked on the lights. I moved to the stereo system, and waves of country music filled the air.

As I moved into the kitchen, I refastened my hair in a tighter bun. It was a compulsion when I was baking or decorating. I couldn’t stand hair falling in my face and impacting my vision. The only problem was that I constantly lost my hair ties. So, when I couldn’t find one, I got creative, using butter knives, piping bags, or anything else that could tie my hair back.

Thankfully, I had a silk scrunchie in my possession tonight, so no cooking utensils were needed. I crossed to the sink and thoroughly washed my hands, drying them on a fresh towel. Then I turned toward the cake.

It was one of my largest. Four tiers. A belated graduation party for a local boy. I didn’t know him or his family, but I had a list of his interests, and his mom had given me free rein. Her only instruction had been, “Make it fun.”

That, I could do. The rising college freshman was into dirt bike racing, so my plan was to create a track all around the cake while his other hobbies served as landmarks along the way. At the top, I’d have him on his dirt bike.

Grinning, I reached for the frosting and dove in. One of the things I loved most about baking was how I could lose myself in the process. Five minutes or five hours could pass, and it wouldn’t matter because it transported me to another world. Everything disappeared but the music and the art I was making. It forced me to stay in the present, like an active meditation.

It was that altered state and the music that kept me from hearing what I should’ve, the squeak of a shoe against the tile floor that had me stilling and then whirling. What I saw came in snapshots. A tall, broad figure. A man. All in black. Wearing some sort of ski mask that hid any distinguishing features other than the fact that he was white.

The seconds it took my brain to register what I was seeing were seconds too long. The man lunged. I tried to dodge and escape his grasp but wasn’t fast enough. He caught me by the hair, yanking me to him so my back was to his front. Cold metal pressed against my jaw.

“Empty the register,” he snarled. But it wasn’t a normal voice. It was distorted somehow. Robotic, like a computer’s tone. Or affected in some way.

My heart hammered against my ribs, and blood roared in my ears. The man shook me by the hair, and I couldn’t help the cry of pain that left my lips.

“Open the fucking register.” He pushed me forward toward the counter, the gun jabbing into my jaw.

A million thoughts ran through my mind: the pepper spray at the bottom of my purse, the self-defense move that meant sending an elbow to the man’s ribs. But none of that helped when a gun was pressed to my head.

My hand shook as I punched in the code, and the drawer shot open. There wasn’t much in there, just enough to get us started tomorrow. I’d taken everything else to the bank on my way home. Just like I’d done every day since moving in with Cope.

“Put it in a bag. Nice and slow.”

My trembling didn’t let up as I reached for one of our to-go bags under the counter. Luca’s face flashed in my mind. “Please don’t hurt me. I have a son?—”

The man’s hand tightened in my hair, and he shook me with a ferocity that stole my breath. “I don’t wanna hear it, bitch.”

A strangled noise left my throat, but I swallowed any words that wanted to escape. I grabbed for the bills in the register and stuffed them into the paper bag. I’d worked so hard on the design. The adorable little emblem that went with the words The Mix Up . It was quirky and a little off-kilter, so in opposition to a violent crime.

“Where’s the rest of it? I know you’ve gotta have more on hand with your fancy-ass hockey fuck buddy.”

I stiffened, my muscles locking as if cement had been poured into the sinew. “Th-this is all I have.”

The man’s grip changed, moving from my hair to my throat, his fingers constricting my airway. “You’d better be fucking with me. Because if there’s no more cash here, I’ll take my payment in flesh.”

I shook violently as I struggled to suck in air. “I take it to the bank every day,” I croaked.

The man’s grip on my throat tightened, and he whirled me around, shoving me against the counter so hard that white-hot pain flashed through me. “I’ll find it my goddamned self.”

In the kitchen lights, I saw a glint of metal behind the man, and then it was colliding with my face. The pain was all-consuming, taking over every inch of me before I felt the world falling away and descended into blessed nothingness.